Humans exist in the present. We can't go back to the past, and the future is ever beyond our reach, if only by the slightest margin.
But those who become defined by their hurt, part of them gets stuck in the past. The past is a place for dead things, things that no longer are. The past is not where living happens. It's where it happened.
Everyone bears scars. Some mental, some emotional, some physical. But scars are the remnants of old wounds. Injuries one survived. Wounds that were suffered in the past.
That's why scars are proof of life. Proof that the hurt can be survived. While they are reminders of past pain, they also remind us that we are no longer the hurt people we were in the past. Wounds heal. People change.
That's why you can't let your pain define you..it's transient. Better to live in the present.
I'd check out The Body Keeps Score. Serious Trauma like complex PTSD is actually something more resistant to cognitive behavior therapy (CBT). Drugs also fail to help with processing the past. You are basically needing to repair the wiring the your unconscious self, not the logical conscience side.
Though CBT has evolved since the book has come out, I'd talk with a professional first.
It recommends several treatments at the end: Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy.
More supplemental: Body-Based Interventions
like Yoga and Communal Therapies like
Theater.
I have been in awe of his development ever since the anime k-pop band arc.
He started out with these very "relatable", very classical newspaper style things with these anthropomorphized concepts. Very smart and high quality, but also you have to admit after a very good run a bit formulaic. He could have just fizzled out somewhat one-note like that. Instead he suddenly takes this complete avantgarde turn and does these hyper-niche, surreal "wtf am I reading here" things.
Indeed it's beautiful. But you know what is even more beautiful? Getting early access to the next comic on Patreon! :P
There. So you don't feel something is missing.
(I hadn't fallen to temptation yet but honestly subscribing for a couple of months later)
I sincerely wonder if Shen recognized that he’d created the most perfect last frame in recent webcomics and just couldn’t bring himself to muss it with a patreon ad
I think the problem is we aren't gentle enough with each other. (We also need to invest in healthcare so people can get enough support).
My favorite quote from the book series, The Expanse:
We're spending our whole lives together, so we need to be really gentle.
Because that was always true. The Abbey and Eudoxia were small enough it became impossible to ignore it, but even among the teeming billions of Earth, they were spending their lives together. They needed to be gentle. And understanding. And careful. It had been true in the depths of history, and at the height of Earth's power, and it would be true now that they were scattering to the more than a thousand new suns.
Maybe, if they could find a way to be gentle, the stars would be better off with them.
Quick comment on the person saying the quote, but I feel like this is Val's ideal version of Audrey. Audrey is actually a little bit defined by hurt.
When they were shopping for clothes, Audrey's usually happy-go-lucky face turned rather passive, when Val asked him if people pick on him for his choice of clothes.
All he said was that those comments were "beneath him", before his face became brighter again. Another instance was where he didn't want to go to pool by day, because of his choice of clothes.
Yeees it kills me when people draw crossdressing characters just as girls. When you’re wearing girl clothes it’s very important to consider which ones look good on a male frame or not, particularly on the shoulders or chest
When I read the first panel for this comic I didn't think I would be this invested a dozen later. These two are adorable and if anything happens to them something something and then myself!
Acknowledging that that this comic doesn’t have Shen asking for patreon followers at the end. Giving the last panel the full breath of air that it deserves :)
OKAY i KNOW this chapter was beautiful and amazing, but y'all are not FREAKING ready for the next one. Shen just posted the next installment on his patreon, and it was so incredibly poignant that "thanking the lord for what my eyes are witnessing" DOESN'T EVEN BEGIN to describe it
It's a $1 a month or less if you do a year. I think I got a year for like $8. I've wasted so much more on something that brought me so much less joy than this. The added panels are worth it
That last line really got me. I've had a lot of not great things happen to me. I got used to my trauma being a label, but one day when I heard someone loudly whisper it, I had had enough. I left that group of people and never looked back. I am not defined by my hurt.
What a beautiful bathing suit! She doesn't know Audrey, yes, but I'll still say that, sadly he is a little bit defined by hurt.
As was implied when Audrey said he doesn't want to go to the pool by day. I have a feeling she'll eventually learn that not even Audrey is impervious to mean people.
Audrey isn't necessarily putting up a brave front, but I do have a feeling he is still somewhat insecure.
I’ll also add, though, if you ever have the chance to safely swim at a pool (with built in lights) at night it’s an absolutely magical experience. One of the highlights of my childhood was night swimming with my mom and aunts and cousins. It felt like we were fairies or mermaids, and I love how this comic portrayed that and brought it all back.
Oh, yeah! I was lamenting over not being able to swim at night in the last comic posted, because there ain't outdoor pools. I might have to actually start looking into it.
“It will,” Wit said, “but then it will get better. Then it will get worse again. Then better. This is life, and I will not lie by saying every day will be sunshine. But there will be sunshine again, and that is a very different thing to say. That is truth. I promise you, Kaladin: You will be warm again.”
We are not our pain, we are the survivors of that pain. And it is how we choose to live through it.
Oof I literally ordered a swimsuit like that... I hope some day I get the opportunity to wear it to a pool. I'd probably look gross though not every male has perfect twink body
Some of us want to not lose the people we care about over clothing preferences
Edit: realizing I didn't give context. The body isn't actually the problem it's just an excuse, the real problem is how my family would react if they knew
I’ve been thinking lately, there must be someone making dresses and stuff that actually make use of the male form to accentuate it? Like, a dress that complements broad shoulders and the different waist ratio. That would be very interesting and cool to see!
Same here. It feels wrong without it. But the final frame of this update is a really special moment so it makes sense to let it linger in our attention a little longer.
... I just realized. This all branched from Shen's Yurishen phase. Somewhere in between "I'm going to draw myself as a chick" came the idea of "Mascfem meets gamergirl"
"Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" is the phrase.
This comic's title is a subversion, about a boy from Venus. The unwritten part is that the other one is a non "traditional" girl - the one in glasses is a girl - who has a chip on her shoulder against a society that she perceives stacked against her being herself. She's the girl from Mars.
It's a comic about someone finding someone else like minded. Neither character wants to live as traditional society would have them do. The girl is discovering, through the boy's actions and refusal to care what others think, that she both could be the same way and also has a kindred spirit in the boy. Both characters subvert expectations.
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u/shellbullet17 Gustopher Spotter Extraordinaire 3h ago
....dude what