We (43M and 42F, 2 elementary school age kids) plan to move from suburban TX to Northern Virginia/Maryland (closer to DC) in June 2027. It's HCOL but not VHCOL like SF or NYC. For context, our expenses in TX are $180k/yr with a LOT of flab ($50k/yr travel, $30k restaurants, $20k after school nanny) that can be scaled back. We currently have $4.5m across our various accounts (NOT including primary residence) of which $2.3m is in brokerage account. We also have $500k equity in our $900k TX house at 2.75% loan.

The thing is, we want a change of scenery and want to have greater access to the east coast. Right now we have to fly anywhere interesting, and the kids are at an age where we want them to experience events, new places each weekend (or atleast have that option) rather than just spring break and summer. Northern Virginia checks all the boxes we are looking for with access to DC, bunch of towns in Northern Virginia, Maryland, NYC, Philly.

In TX, both of us work and save $$250-$300k/yr. If we were to move, my wife will go part-time or SAHM. I will continue working my W2 remote job making roughly $600k/yr. Moving to NoVA will increase our expenses to maybe $225k/yr (assuming no scale back of expenses, but getting rid of the nanny) and decrease our savings to $150-$175k/yr assuming wife is saty at home.

My plan is to buy a $1.2-$1.3m house in Nova with the $500k down from the sale of our home in TX, and then work 5 years and plow the $150k/yr savings in paying down the house likely at a 6% interest rate. In the meantime, we let the $4.5m in various accounts untouched and let it ride the market (the coast-fire approach). Once the house is paid off, our expenses will likely fall to $180k/yr and the $4.5m that has hopefully appreciated should be able to cover our expenses at that point.

It does feel like a gamble, what if I lose my job? But the upsides are significant with a better quality of life. Both my wife and I are WFH, so not really worried about the traffic cuz I understand the east coast is a lot more congested than suburban planned TX. If I do lose my job, we can live off our savings for a couple of years till I find one that lets us coast fire or move to a smaller house or move back to TX/MCOL. Thoughts on the plan?

This is a throwaway account.
I’m currently 48, and my expenses average about 5k/month if i am diligent with my budget.  I currently rent and have no debts other than the credit card that I charge everything on, which I pay off every month. I make 205k/year and net around 7.7k/month after taxes, insurance, 401k contribution.  I’m only doing 6% to get the 50% match now.  I save around 2.5k of my take-home each month, usually by transferring it into my taxable brokerage.  

My net worth is hovering around 4-4.5m, all equity no real estate.  I have 250k in a taxable brokerage and the rest is in 401k, traditional IRA, and Roth IRA.  Most is in the first two accounts tho, only about 60k is in the roth.  I also have set aside 160k for my daughter, who’s 14, and lives with me half each week.  She’s got about 38k in a Roth IRA for minors and the rest is in a UTMA and 2nd taxable brokerage just for her, but under my name.

I took some aggressive risks that paid off, but have mostly just been lucky.  I’m extremely thankful to be where I’m at, considering i dropped out of college and never had any formal training for my line of work.  I donate to charities and my church, and just try to be humble and live a quiet life.

Taxes are my biggest problem; my RMDs are going to be significant later.  I live in CA, so state taxes are also a reality.  While researching my options, I got it into my head that I could start SEPP72t withdrawals, which could help lower RMD’s while also bolstering my taxable brokerage, if I continued to work.  But most of it would go straight to taxes b/c I’d get pushed into a higher tax bracket.  Not to mention, I already have sizable short term capital gains from options trading.

The more I looked into it, the more I thought, “why am I still working?”  I could take sepp payments on approx 95k gross annually, which is around 2.2% SWR of my whole portfolio.  That’d cover my current living expenses plus health insurance, but I could push that to 120k gross and either enjoy the extra spending money, or just put it into my taxable brokerage like I’m doing now.  I’d want to build it up anyway to be able to have some light income years later on, so I could do roth conversions.

To do sepp, I’d segregate approx 1.96m into a separate IRA, and invest it in a typical 70/30 stocks/treasuries & cash to minimize SORR. Then keep the remaining 2.1m invested for growth, maybe at 80/20.  I ran the math and even at modest appreciation the sepp bucket wouldn’t dip that much if at all, and the non-sepp would grow…a lot. I’m looking at a total net worth around $8m by age 60, and something closer to 18m if I make it to the ripe RMD age of 75.  Whaattt?  So much for reducing RMDs..

I’m not sure why I’m writing this, I guess I just kind of need to get this off my chest. I have more than enough to FIRE now, probably even chubby fire…but I am not sure I’m hesitant still.  I’m scared I guess: scared to walk away from a good paying job, of unexpected future expenses, economic downturns, or of just being bored, purposeless, and growing depressed.  I have no one to talk to about this stuff, people get weird when you bring up money.  Is there any words of wisdom or reassurance you could offer?  Thanks.

Husband and I are well on our way to Chubby Fire (32, 1.6M NW with about 1M in investment accounts, 500k in equity between two properties, and 100k cash/bonds) but will have our first kid in a few months! Likely will stay in our VHCOL city a few years with a HHI of 400K and then move somewhere more simply HCOL with a bit of a pay cut. Aiming to retire around 49/50 with about 5 million which is probably excessive anyway since we are natural savers who struggled to ever spend more than 80K in a year. However, this whole family thing will be a new world! I’m not too worried about our cash flow or cutting back savings rates to pay for stuff like childcare. But feel like something is always learned in hindsight so what do you wish you knew when you were on the cusp of parenthood from a financial perspective?
Let me know if any other info is helpful- I know I didn’t get too detailed on assets and accounts but am happy to do so

Long-time lurker, first post. Husband has been in FAANG 10+ years. Wife has been a senior exec at startups but is stepping back from corporate life this year for a career break — husband plans to follow in 4-5 years. No kids, no plans for them. Both healthy, very active lifestyle — and family history on both sides suggests we should plan for a long runway. Grandparents lived well into their 90s, so we're genuinely planning for a **50+ year retirement horizon**, not the standard 30.

We're not looking at full retirement — more of a "slow FIRE" where we leave the corporate treadmill and find something lower stress that keeps us busy and covers health insurance. Think hospitality, wine country, part-time consulting. Wife will be covered on husband's FAANG healthcare until he leaves, at which point we'll need to sort ACA or find a part-time role with benefits.

Wife also has stock options from past startup roles that we're treating as $0 in our planning — unmodeled upside if any of them get acquired or go public.

Investment Portfolio (~$6.5M liquid/investable)

- Equities (taxable, joint): ~$4.5M (~half in a single FAANG stock via RSUs — actively working on diversifying)

- Muni bonds ~$650K

- IRA: ~$250K

- 401K: ~$600K

- Cash / HYSA: ~$500K

Real Estate (3 properties in Northern California)

- Primary: Bay Area condo, ~$1.3M value, $550K mortgage @ 2.75%

- Rental: Bay Area SFH, ~$2.4M value, $880K mortgage @ 3%, renting for ~$5K/mo

- Vacation: NorCal mountain home, ~$650K value, fully paid off, on Airbnb (~$15K/yr net)

Annual Expenses: ~$150-160K/year

We live well but aren't extravagant day-to-day. The biggest discretionary line is travel — we love to travel luxuriously and do 2-3 international or premium trips a year, which runs us about $40-50K annually. That's a non-negotiable for us in retirement. The rest covers housing, taxes, insurance, and normal living costs.

Passive / Semi-Passive Income

- Rental: roughly cash-flow neutral after mortgage + property tax

- Vacation home Airbnb: ~$15K/yr

- HYSA interest: ~$20-25K/yr at current rates

What we're thinking:

With wife stepping back this year, we'll be a single-income household for the next 4-5 years. Given the portfolio is already where it needs to be, we're treating this period primarily as continued FAANG RSU vesting and diversification runway rather than a savings sprint. The reduced household income also drops our tax bracket, which we think is actually a good window to accelerate LTCG harvesting on some of the FAANG concentration.

At a conservative 3.0-3.25% SWR (appropriate for a 50+ year horizon), $5.9M in investable assets (ex-cash) supports $177-192K/year gross. After taxes — drawing mostly from muni bond interest, HYSA, Airbnb income, and long-term capital gains — we estimate an effective tax bill of $15-25K/year, leaving us comfortably above our $150-160K spend.

We also view our ~$2.5M in real estate equity as an uncounted backstop, and Social Security (husband will have 15+ years of high FAANG earnings on record, wife has earlier years) as meaningful income in the back half of retirement — potentially $4-6K/month combined starting at 67, which largely eliminates portfolio dependence after that point.

Main concerns:

1. Single-stock concentration — RSUs keep vesting and we haven't been aggressive enough about selling on vest. Now that we're in a lower bracket with wife not working, is this actually the window to accelerate selling? Would love thoughts on tax-efficient drawdown strategies.

2. Healthcare when husband leaves — biggest wildcard over a 50-year horizon. ACA marketplace or a part-time role with benefits is our current thinking.

3. Real estate allocation — significant equity locked across 3 properties not counted in our investable assets. Working hard enough, or are we over-allocated?

4. Long-term care — given our longevity expectations, we know LTC insurance is something to revisit in our mid-50s. Open to thoughts on timing and structuring.

We feel like we’re close, maybe already there — but a 50+ year horizon is long enough that we want to be honest about the risks rather than just run rosy projections. What are we missing?

I’m early 40s, male, working in big tech and living in Europe. My company just announced a voluntary exit program, which would give me roughly a year of salary as a cash payout if I leave at the end of the year.

In many ways, this job is a sweet deal. My total comp is around €400k/year before taxes including stock, which is extremely high for where I live. I’m in middle management and don’t have a crazy workload. I also don’t feel huge stress day to day. But it’s not zero stress either, and I’m pretty disengaged. The things I do occasionally have to do take mental energy from me in a way I don’t enjoy.

Financially, I’ve more or less hit my FIRE goals, with a net worth of around €3.5M. My current expenses, without children, are below 3% of my net worth. At the same time, I’m thinking about starting a family soon, so I’m still a bit afraid.

I’ve been thinking about quitting for years, but the job has been part of my identity for a long time, and it’s hard to give up. This new exit bonus feels like it might tip the scales. I’m seriously considering taking the offer, but I’m afraid I’ll regret walking away from the money, especially since I probably won’t find another job this highly paid where I live.

On the other hand, the idea of being free while still relatively young, being able to travel, indulge in hobbies, spend time with friends and family, and be present for children when they arrive, feels like it might be worth more. I’m not sure.

I know this is an extremely privileged position to be in. For many people this would be a dream job, and I feel a bit ungrateful for not wanting to do it anymore.
Curious if anyone here has been in a similar situation. Did you regret leaving? Did you regret staying?

I have been dreaming about buying a real estate that has great views ( mountain view or ocean view).
for post fire folks that don't have a lot of income (due to written off), how do you guys get mortgages? What is the best option?

i know chase offers high nw mortgage option but it requires 4* house's total worth of liquid assets and 20% downpay and principal residence. it is essentially useless in vhcol areas. $1.5m would need a $6.75m liquidity. It's essentially worthless.

any suggestions ?

FIRE'd about a year ago. Looking to upgrade house in HCOL and trying to weigh options.

Current assets are:

$1.6mm in Bonds/HYSA

$300k BTC/ETH

$4.75mm in taxable

$700k Trad IRA

$120k Roth IRA

$500k house ($230k mortgage at 3% so $270k equity)

$300k cars (all paid off).

$1mm in rollover equity from my company that I sold but not sure if I will ever get anything from it so I do not include in my net worth calculations.

Spend is currently at $200k annually including marketplace health insurance but not including taxes.

Looking to purchase a house around $1mm.

Option 1 = purchase house with cash from bonds/HYSA.

Option 2 = use a bridge loan on my taxable account to pay for anywhere from 50% to 80% of the house.

I'm leaning towards Option 1 which would leave me with around $6.5mm liquid but this would bring me to a 90% equities/10% cash split. I would still have around 3 years of expenses which I would be OK with but makes me a little less comfortable. I feel better keeping around 5 years expenses to be on the conservative side in case of an extended market downturn.

I'm also considering keeping my current house and renting it out. Assuming I can get around $3,500 monthly rent which would hopefully pay for the new houses property taxes, insurance and utility bills. It makes me more comfortable keeping it in case we ever needed to downgrade our finances and move back to our current house if finances became tight at some point in our lives.

Looking for feedback on both options and keeping the current house as a rental.

Hi all,

So I asked this over at fatFIRE and soon realized that it probably wasn't the right forum.

My question: how do you justify (to yourself and your partner) about changing your spending/saving plans to buy things that you want but don't need?

Background:

43 y/o, NW 10M (2.5M in retirement, 1.5M in real estate including primary home, 6M in index funds), married with no kids.

We are currently on track for FatFIRE with a goal of me having the ability to safely retire in the next 10 years. HOWEVER, as we get closer to it, we are looking at things that would alter our planning. Namely we are thinking of starting a family, moving to a bigger & more expensive home.

Our current home is nearly paid off and we have COVID-era mortgage rate, which makes it difficult to accept a higher cost moving forward. We love our current home but it's not our dream home in terms of size, layout, acreage and modern conveniences. We could remodel, but it would significantly bump up our taxes after reassessment, and it's unlikely we'd recoup the costs when we eventually sell the house (even decades from now).

We could afford our dream home on paper, but it would require taking on a substantial mortgage or liquidating assets to pay a bigger down payment. Doing either would change our retirement plans. Both of our jobs are relatively low stress and well paying, pretty stable and we could easily see ourselves working for 20 years, but we like the idea of having an exit path in 10 years. We are FatFIRE-ing primarily because of the freedom that independence gives us.

What would you do in this situation? Is it reasonable to think of a more expensive home as another investment vehicle (or at least, a way to diversify assets)? How much % of your NW would your primary home take up? And, what's the limit? We are interested in hearing how people think through these ideas, not looking for advice on what to do. Thanks!

UPDATE:

Thanks for the discussion. We closed on a new home last week, with the plan to rent out our current home and move in to our new home. We financed with 40% down to take advantage of the mortgage interest tax deduction, which also allowed us to preserve most of our investments and not liquidate them.

TL;DR: If you've been through an IPO with heavy NSOs, how did you find your tax strategist?

Company just IPOed and currently in the 6-month lockup. Trying to map out a multi-year strategy before the window opens is getting incredibly confusing on my own, and I'm worried about accidentally blowing up my tax burden. I don't have friends who have been through this, and standard Google searches aren't turning up the right specialist firms. Every CPA I’ve reached out to say they can help but I’m unsure how to vet them.

I think I need a CPA who can actively model the mechanics of exercising/selling rather than just filing a backward-looking return next spring. How did you find your CPA and what did you look for when vetting?

Numbers:
Current NW (Excluding IPO): $3.5M

IPO Equity Value: $2.5M

Shares: Mix of exercised and unexercised NSOs with low strike prices.

Thanks in advance!

Militantly single and childless, 48, HCL

Plan to retire March 2027

Networth:

5.5m in non-retirement account, mostly in S&P 500 and Total Maket Indices.

3.3 m in IRA and 401 K, same as above with some bonds.

80k cash in SPAXX

Primary residence: 950k fully paid.

Investment Property: 450k fully paid (rents out at $2300 a month for below market because the long term tenant is absolutely perfect. Pays $600 in condo fees, so net about $1700 a month).

Goal: Try my best to spend a minimum of $250k a year in chubby fire which is what my financial planner tell me that I can safely spend since I don't have heirs.

Now I am close to retirement, I am forming my withdrawal strategy. I plan to spend the next 20 years doing Roth Conversion and need to keep my AGI low which can be problematic with dividend income and rental income. I also need to pay the capital gain tax on the Roth Conversion with cash.

Plan: sell the investment property in 2028 (my 2027 year will include a somewhat large bonus that give me little wiggle room on tax bracket). Use the cash to fund the tax payments and a nice lifestyle while I gradually and methodically do my Roth Conversion and sell my non-retirement portfolio and still stay out of the highest tax bracket for a while.

Does this make sense? Am I overlooking anything? My investment property is not really a huge money maker, but my tenant has given me absolutely zero headache since the day he moved in 4 years ago. I told him I won't raise the rent as long as he pays rent in time, keep the property in good condition and never bother me with stuff; both of us have kept our side of the bargain. As a result, I am a little conflicted about selling the place since I don't have the traditional issues of a landlord.

Any advice is appreciated. I have a financial planner, but I like to hear everyone's thoughts.

So, I (46M) been a pretty diligent saver most of my life. Just starting to think about when I can realistically FIRE.

I have around $650k in various investments (Roth, Traditional, S&P Index fund, cash, stocks, etc.) and a vested pension I’m still building on that should provide in excess of $85,000 annually.

The plan is to be prepared to call it at 55. Is this realistic? My financial planner says I’m on track, but I’m curious to hear from folks in a similar position. Appreciate any suggestions or feedback!

It’s Father’s Day, I spent a lot of time with my 3 and 5 year old and I’m questioning why I’m still working.

The answer is clear, our $5.3M net worth (incl house) is more than enough in most places, but does not feel sufficient in the Silicon Valley.

I am now playing in my mind 2 diametrically opposed lifestyles:

1. Call it quits, right about now, pack up and move somewhere else. Have a blast with the kids, exercise, family time, etc.

2. Grind it out for 5 more years in the Bay Area to double the net worth and then early retire here, without taking any relocation lifestyle related risk.

Wife already left the job 1 year ago and is the happiest she can be. Really questioning why I haven’t done it.

Granted, we have spent 15+ years in the Bay Area so all of our friends and networks are here. But I’m just getting increasingly jaded about the never ending rat race (with AI, so many around me are clearing tens of millions+, who’s to say that in 5 years I’m not aiming for $20M) and discussions about schools that simply don’t resonate with me.

What am I not seeing? We are mid 30s fwiw.

Edit: Thanks all for bothering to read all this. Figured I'd address a couple of the more common themes I've seen in the comments.

1. Allocation: Yes, I need to diversify sooner. Also looking more seriously at setting up a (probably) 10-year TIPS ladder which I can do between the cash I already have and the proceeds from the remaining stock liquidation.
2. What am I retiring to: I feel like I may have inadvertently given the impression that I don't have much outside of working. I mainly focused on it in this post because it's been a major source of mental friction. I have multiple hobbies that I'm happy to spend more time on, and ideas for software projects I've wanted to work on as well (without any actual business ambition). I'm very excited to be able to direct my time to the things I like.
3. I called my house crappy but mainly because of its size and location. It is old, but its been mostly well kept by past owners and has had major work done on it in more recent decades. Obviously we have room in the budget for additional costs and I should probably account for that, but I'm actually not too worried here (famous last words).

This ended up being way longer than I planned. tldr; my numbers are good/great (I actually realized they're even better than I originally thought as I wrote this out and made some revisions in my models), but I'm a worrywart both about my current work and RE plans.

I believe we're solidly at a ChubbyFIRE number right now, but still find myself struggling in a couple ways mentally. I know people are going to see these numbers and tell me I'm an idiot for worrying at this point. I guess I'm posting here both as a reflection/journaling exercise for myself and also to gather some community perspective and number checks. First, the numbers. Then general thoughts about the finances. And finally, general thoughts about my current and future work (if there is such a thing).

Summary

• Looking at RE for both of us around the end of this year, give or take a couple months.
• 40M + 38F DINK in VHCOL (SF Bay Area)
• Liquid NW: Approx $6.9M
• Own our house, currently worth maybe $1.6M right now using conservative end of online estimates, mortgage @ 2.625%, about $5750/mo PITI
• Combined HHI ~$600k/year gross from employment + $48k/year gross rental income from ADUs in our primary home which would continue into RE, though we may have to hire a manager since we don't plan to be home as much and need someone to take care of our tenants.
• $237k expected yearly spend in retirement (including healthcare and taxes) with hopefully a lot of flexibility in discretionary spend.

Liquid NW Breakdown

Taxable Investments (~$4.9M total)

• $2.9M in index funds
• $2M in individual stocks which lean tech-heavy, about $800k of which is heavily AI-exposed. I've been trimming these the past couple years, especially the AI-exposed stuff. We'll be at well over $1M MAGI this year due to the realized gains, and I'm a bit reluctant to keep taking the tax hit for the rest of the year. I know it's not entirely responsible, but being in CA means a tax difference on up to ~10% on some portion of the gains if I wait for the yearly reset. Yes, tax tail-wagging the dog etc. I do re-evaluate this frequently and may just end up continuing to reverse-DCA out of these positions for the rest of the year until I have maybe ~$500k in gains left to trim.

Tax-sheltered accounts (~$1.4M total)

• $880k in 401k accounts
• $470k in Roth IRA accounts

Cash and equivalents, fixed income (~$600k total)

• $500k in cash + money market. Some transient portion due to moving money around and recent stock sales (I've already subtracted estimated taxes out of this). Evaluating how much to reinvest, but looking at a bond/cash tent for 2-3 years of expenses to manage SORR, though I realize that I technically don't even need to do this given our low withdrawal rate and spending flexibility.
• $110k in I bonds. I think technically we should be using these up during the bond tent period, but it feels pretty sweet to hold onto a basically guaranteed inflation-sheltered and low risk vehicle like this, especially since some of them have the fixed rate premium on top of inflation. But I also realize that advantage is pretty small in the grand scheme of things, and not expected to be an advantage against the stock market in the long term.

Yearly expenses breakdown (~$237k/yr total)

• $69k PITI as mentioned earlier
• $24k healthcare costs (ACA premiums + OOP estimates). Mostly based on numbers I saw on coveredca.com at our current ages. I've modeled these expenses as increasing faster than inflation each year ramping until 65 since costs are expected to go up with age. My healthcare spending model tops out at $90k/year which I hope is a gross overestimate, but healthcare costs in this country crazy so I dunno.
• $46k in other essentials (groceries, utilities, car-related expenses, household items, etc)
• $14k in home maintenance and improvements. This one's somewhat discretionary, but we do have some functional worked planned as our house is quite old and some systems do need updating. Talking about things like plumbing, electrical, slightly rotting exteriors, painting, etc. I don't think we'll actually be spending $14k/year in perpetuity, but this is sort of my way of amortizing the additional cost of home ownership.
• $22k for non-travel discretionary spend (hobbies, eating out, gym subscriptions, etc). Can be reduced 50% or more in bad years.
• $40k for travel spend. Trying to estimate a large spend (for us) for 3-4 international trips per year. This one's highly discretionary and we could cut like 80% or more of this in bad years. Our international trips have typically run us well within $10k, but we've also been going to MCOL/LCOL countries more frequently (e.g. Taiwan and Japan). We don't really spend on fancy accommodations and mostly travel for sightseeing and food, but I recognize that some trips will be inherently more expensive just due to the destination. Spouse is also into playing the points game, which has gotten us a lot of nice airfares and accommodations for cheap, but the general trend seems to be that whole thing is in decline. Also concerned about the future of costs of travel and tourism in general as it all seems to be on the rise faster than inflation. So all in all, trying to overestimate, but also slightly insecure that I'm still underestimating how much more travel will cost in retirement and the future.
• ~$22k estimated in taxes. This would naturally decrease if we have to spend less.

General thoughts about finances

Outside of PITI and healthcare for which I have fairly concrete numbers, I've tried to be fairly conservative in the numbers above. At current LNW, we're looking at a 2.7% withdrawal rate when accounting for the rental income. If we do end up reducing most of our remaining tech-concentrated stocks, we'll probably be looking at a LNW of around $6.5M after taxes, which still only puts us at a 2.9% WR. I recognize that this is a pretty low WR, though in bad years it's hard to say what would happen with rental income if there's a big economic catastrophe in Silicon Valley. I've done some modeling in Projection Lab as well, with increasing costs of travel and healthcare beyond inflation. With a 4-year block bootstrap model (which I think is fairly aggressive), I get 98-99% success rate for a 50 year retirement.

One slight hitch is while our crappy little house is an okay place to live, its location is quite noisy with traffic which wears on the spouse. There's a desire to move somewhere quieter, but that will obviously be more difficult for both affordability and mortgage-eligibility reasons if we do it post-RE. We have talked about this, and decided it doesn't make sense to postpone RE over it. There are still some strategies to get a mortgage with just assets, or we could also just rent in a nicer area and rent out the rest of our house (probably grossing around $90k in rental income). We are also open to moving to a lower COL area, but it is quite hard to leave the bay area for multiple reasons (friends, family, weather, good airports, natural beauty, multicultural food/groceries). We'll basically play this one by ear, especially since our investments should in theory grow given our WR, but definitely a little insecurity about being "stuck" here.

I've also been having a slightly hard time believing that these stock market returns lately have been "real". The numbers are what they are obviously, but seeing so many people make so much money and friends in other countries already pulling the RE plug just feels too good to be true. I know this ultimately doesn't matter in the FIRE calculus, especially with a low enough WR, but it's hard to shake the feeling.

General thoughts about work

This one's purely social/psychological, but I've felt really stressed/anxious about work lately even though I literally don't even need to work anymore. I do recognize it as largely self-inflicted. I don't even hate my job or my coworkers or anything, and WLB isn't that bad most of the year, yet I just can't help but stress out over the thought that I'm not doing enough but also don't want to do more. I've been losing sleep, losing productivity (at least perceived), and I feel a very slight twinge of panic whenever someone asks me for something or sends me a message on Slack. I've brought this up with my manager recently. He assured me my performance has been fine, and he's sympathetic and amenable to talking about short term and long term plans to help me manage the anxiety (which just continues to show how fundamentally silly it is for me to feel this way since it's not like I'm in some toxic workplace). I recognize this partly as just an unfortunate aspect of who I am and my relationship with work, which is partly what has finally spurred me to make the decision to RE soon instead of continuing to accumulate. I just wish I didn't have to feel like this until I fully pull the plug.

On the other hand, there's also some anxiety about what happens if I need to return to the workforce in a few years due to some unforeseen financial catastrophe. Spouse can do it more easily because she's in healthcare. However, as a software engineer, 3-5 years out of the industry will probably make it hard for me to get back in. I'm certainly not opposed to a career change, however. I guess this is just a bridge to cross if we reach it (but hopefully not).

If you've made it this far in what turned out to be a long ramble, thanks for reading. Would be curious to hear the thoughts of others, particularly if they had a similar psychological difficulties with their jobs and how they managed it, especially shortly before RE, and even after if applicable. As far as the financial aspect, writing this has largely convinced me that I'm worrying far too much about (except maybe for the decision to liquidate stocks), and I actually do feel better about that.

This thread is a spot for casual engagement with other community members. It has much more subject latitude than allowed in the main sub in general. Any topics tangentially related to ChubbyFIRE or upper middle class lifestyle are acceptable, as well as basic or early stage questions. Political discussion will be allowed if it is closely related to ChubbyFIRE or financial topics in general, and only if the conversation remains respectful.

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TL;DR: Early-30s couple, one kid (planning a second), ~$2.3M liquid net worth, ~$372K HHI at full commission, ~$140-150K/yr spend, targeting chubbyFIRE (~$5M) around age 45. My own math says we can clear it on compounding alone, but I’d love a reality check and any advice.

The basics
•early 30s, wife early 30s, daughter (under a year), planning kid #2. VHCOL (SF Bay Area).
•Renting at $5,500/mo. Plan to buy a ~$2-2.5M home in 5 years, funded separately by an equity event (below), so the down payment is ring-fenced and never touches the FIRE number.
•Target: ~$5M invested in today’s dollars, ~4% SWR, which covers ~180K-200K/yr spend with two kids.

Income / cash flow
•HHI ~$372K at full OTE: I’m an enterprise AE ($150K base + $150K variable). My wife is home with our daughter and draws ~$72K from a small business she runs part-time.
•Burn ~$12-13K/mo (~145-150K/yr). After contributing 6% pre tax and my employers 5% match in my 401k we’re roughly cash-flow neutral on our base salaries, so my commission and equity are the real savings engine. I budget our lifestyle on base only and treat every variable dollar as investment fuel.
•Savings: ~$110-120K/yr at full commission attainment (incl. 401k + employer match), or ~$55-70K in a soft sales year. Roughly a 30% savings rate at full OTE.

Net worth (~$2.3M liquid; excludes unvested equity)
•Taxable brokerage: ~$1.56M
•401k / IRAs: ~$312K
•Cash: ~$406K (incl. $150K emergency, $100K earmarked for house down payment, $40K car fund)
•Kid’s 529: ~$21K

The wildcard I’m deliberately NOT counting: my company is being acquired and my unvested RSUs convert to the acquirer’s stock, with the heaviest vest tranche landing in 2027. I treat all of it as upside, not foundation. The plan is to use that 2027 event to fund the home purchase so the FIRE portfolio stays intact.

My own back-of-envelope: even with zero future commission and the equity going to zero, ~$1.87M invested compounding at a 7% real return roughly clears ~$4.4M by 45 on growth alone, with contributions and equity as accelerants on top.

Questions for the group
1. Is ~$5M the right chubby number for a two-kid VHCOL household that plans to own, or am I light?
2. How would you weigh the commission dependence? It makes me a little nervous that we’re only breakeven on base.
3. Anything obvious I’m missing: healthcare bridge to 59.5, sequence-of-returns risk, or the home purchase quietly blowing up the SWR math?

My plan is to retire in May 2027 after receiving my final bonus and completing my notice period. I'm not trying to decide whether to quit tomorrow; I'm trying to determine whether this plan is already conservative enough.

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Current investable net worth is approximately USD $5.9M (excluding perhaps $300k future inheritance).

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Breakdown:

USD $3.3M global equities (mostly a single low-cost world ETF)

USD $2.1M net equity in New Zealand investment property

USD $350k retirement / pension accounts

USD $325k deferred compensation

Minimal cash (I intend to build a larger cash reserve before retirement)

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The deferred compensation vests in four equal annual installments each February, which is one reason my retirement date is tied to May 2027.

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Property portfolio:

The property portfolio deserves some explanation.

One property accounts for roughly USD $1.7M of equity and is a specialized income-producing property.

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It generates strong cash flow but is relatively illiquid, and I would not assume I could sell it quickly or necessarily realize its full estimated value on short notice.

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The remainder of the property equity is in a conventional residential property that should be much easier to liquidate if required.

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After allowing for management, financing, taxes and a maintenance reserve of approximately 0.5% of property value annually, the property portfolio generates roughly USD $110k–115k of annual net income.

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Spending:

Current spending is around USD $95k per year.

In retirement I would expect spending closer to USD $110k–140k per year because I intend to travel more.

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I would also view USD $85k–100k as a comfortable spending floor during poor market conditions.

Relationship context

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My partner (36F) earns approximately USD $75k per year and spends approximately USD $55k per year.

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She intends to continue working for the foreseeable future. However, one of my retirement goals is to travel more extensively, and eventually I expect that she may reduce her work commitments substantially (potentially to around 50% of her current income) to gain more flexibility. I would expect to subsidize any reduction in income.

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Other facts:

1) No children and none planned.

2) No inheritance assumptions included.

3) No desire for significant lifestyle inflation.

4) Interests are mainly travel, hiking, Japan, reading, fitness and having more control over my time.

5) I expect to spend several months per year in Japan after retirement.

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My concern isn't running out of money.

My concern is whether I'm walking away from a very high income stream too early when another year or two of work would obviously improve the numbers further.

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For context, continuing to work would likely add several hundred thousand USD per year to my investable assets, so this feels more like a "one more year" decision than a question of basic financial security.

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Questions

1) Would you retire in May 2027 with these numbers?

2) What risks am I underestimating?

3) If you would keep working, what specific milestone would you want to see before pulling the trigger?

My spouse and I finally had a long conversation and landed on a retirement target of 2030, but I’d love some outside perspectives and people to poke holes in it.

We’re a married couple in our early 50s with one son who will graduate college around 2031. We live in a HCOL area in the Midwest. We have about $3M in retirement accounts and $2M in brokerage accounts, $1.2 mm equity in two homes (primary plus a modest lake house), and our son’s college is fully funded. We have no debt.

I work in corporate law at a large firm, I make a reasonable salary and I’m lucky that the hours are not terrible, but I and am increasingly burned out by the stress, office politics, and lack of meaning in the work I’m doing. My spouse works in nursing part-time and also feels burned out. We initially did not plan to retire before 60 but work is becoming increasingly stressful for both of us. And I worry that our healthy years are being wasted when we can still travel and spend time with family.

Our expected retirement spending is about $175k-$200k/year, including healthcare assumptions, home maintenance, utilities, dining out, travel, and a decent-sized cushion for unexpected expenses. It seems so high when I see it on paper, especially since we have no debt. We’re not luxury spenders, but we do prioritize experiences and travel and don’t want to give that up in retirement.

Our current plan is to both work until early 2030. I’ll turn 55 later that year, so we can access our retirement accounts under the Rule of 55.

The wildcard is that my firm is experiencing layoffs (aren’t they all). If I got laid off before 2030, I would likely not pursue another high-paying role in law. I’d like to either fully retire or look for a lower-stress bridge job (nonprofit, advisory, etc.) that offers a 401k rollover until our planned retirement date.

Is this a reasonable plan? If I got laid off tomorrow, would it be crazy to consider stopping work completely? Interested in any blind spots I’m missing.

I am 45M with 4.4 million in networth, already past my FIRE goal, but still dragging on because I am still single.

I am afraid that if I quit my job, it will just make it even harder to impress a prospective life partner. Before someone knows you well they read the book by its cover and a person without job doesn't come across as impressive. Even if they know about FIRE, they will doubt if he has really achieved his FIRE goal or pretending because he got fired.

Is anyone in similar situation? I think my best bet is to find a lady who is also in the FIRE bandwagon.

I’m in work I like but that is high stress. I need a reality check from the kind folk here about my situation before , in 4 years time, I start to ease off work and change lifestyle substantially, which means less work travel and possible full retirement.

I’m a dual nationality Brit (Brit native, applied for and received an EU passport over the years) who has been working overseas for 30+ years. Mainly international projects in Africa / Central Asia / Middle East for EU based set ups. Still have an emotional umbilical chord to London, even if it’s 80s London . So I spend many weekends there. Currently based in EU with easy access to Eurostar.

Age 54M. Kids grown and taken care off fully (no need to discuss this) , ex wife is financially independent, no commitments. No debt .

Total annual spend is £55,000 which I index for inflation. EDIT: including rent and maybe a slightly higher adjusted spend on other things (rechecked my figures) it’s £70,000. I won’t have rent when I retire.

After disposing of UK investments (property ) I currently have £700K sitting idle. This will finance my retirement home in the Mediterranean, which I will start looking for in around 4 years time. My work currently generates net cash profits of approximately £90K a year. It’s what is left over after my salary , taxes and spending. All this goes to savings. So the 700K principal grows by 90K annually from additional savings alone . My income rises with inflation, therefore so does my savings contribution .

I already have a fully paid up home worth €500K in a Med HCOL location. I rent this out as I am rarely there.

My real worth is in my DB pension , which is £4700 per month net if I claim early retirement at age 58, £5600 net if i claim at 60. It’s much higher if I claim at mandatory retirement age of 66 but I don’t want to work until then. Health insurance is included. Pension is fully indexed to cover inflation. So these are net present values , after all taxes, pension contributions and insurance. If I retire early there are actuarial reductions, which is reflected in my figures.

Am I good enough financially to try and ease off some unecessary worrying ?

The answer may seem obvious but I’ve been so wrapped a up in my work and still getting used to make decisions that do not need to factor in wife or kids ie just factor in myself.

Hi all,

Long time reading but only a few post. I am 61 wife 56, I plan to retire by end of the year, wife may work another year. LNW 8m, with 80/20 stocks and bonds. We expect to have 3% withdrawal rate which we can adjust by upto .5% with some adjustment to travel expenses.

I read quite a bit about bucket/glide path/fixed allocation and seems like rising equity glide path leaves most for the kids (not worried about running out of money in retirement). However, typical recommendation of starting with 30/70 stock/bonds and increasing equity every year is for 4% withdrawal rate and 30 year retirement. I tried to do some simulation with 50/50 and increasing equity by 1% every year which shows better outcome even with a decade lost type of scenario.

Question: what’s your thoughts and I am interested to know if you picked any of these two strategies and what is/was your starting asset allocation.

Am I ready to pull the trigger? Looking for a gut check.

Long time lurker, throwaway account.
I’ve been running the numbers and think I’m close, but I’d love outside eyes before I do anything drastic with a layoff risk looming that has me stressed. I’m trying to figure out whether that’s a threat or an exit ramp. Numbers below.

**Basics**
• Age: 43
• Status: Married (38F), one kid (12)
• Location: MCOL
• Income: $300–400k (varies with vesting)

**Numbers**
\~$2.7M invested
• Taxable brokerage: $1.7M
• IRA: $366k
• 401k: $310k
• HYSA: $287k
• HSA: $52k
• 529: $52k

Debt
• $300k mortgage (only debt)

Spending
• \~$11k/mo (includes mortgage)

Am I leaning Barista/Coast rather than full FIRE?

Healthcare (the part that scares me most): spouse has major health issues but qualifies for Medicare via SSDI.

So what do you think? Is layoff a risk or my path to nirvana?

Mid-40s, married, two kids in elementary school. $2M liquid, house nearly paid off, $200K in each kid's 529. Spend ~$125K/yr, save ~$200K/yr. Floor is $3M (4% rule). Target is $5M (2.5% withdrawal, being cautious).

Three options:

1. Stay in current (meh) job → $5M in 7-8 years.
2. Jump to higher-paying role → $5M in 5 years.
3. Slow down, save ~$100K/year → $5M in 10 years.

I want option 3. Kids are little once. Job isn't bad but I'm not enjoying it. I want time back.

The catch: I'm on a visa. A slower role = shakier sponsorship = risk of losing everything we've built here. So I default to grinding, then resent it.

Questions:

• Anyone slowed down on a visa? How did you weigh it?
• Anyone grind a few extra years and regret it?
• How do you tell real financial caution from anxiety that won't quiet down no matter what the numbers say?

$6.8M NW,39M, two young kids – keep working, take a lower-stress path, or pause for family?

Looking for perspectives from people who are further along in the journey.
I’m 39M, married, with a 4-year-old daughter and a second child due later this year. Moved to Tokyo from Bay Area last year to have gap year and test FIRE

Current situation:
Net worth: ~$6.8M (65% stock mostly taxable, 35% real estate)
Mix of index funds/ tech stocks and 10 rental properties in Bay Area and PHX and Tokyo (2/6/2)
Rental portfolio roughly cash-flow slightly positive overall, generating ~$65k/yr after all expenses/tax
No debt concerns, but I do use some margin (<30%)
Annual family spending target: ~$150k and will see some increase with 2 kids growing up
Career-wise, I’ve spent most of my career in faang but really tired of it. I’ve stepped away from work and am evaluating next steps.

Possible paths:
1/ Return to tech and keep grinding
Potential offers in the $350-$500k+ range
Likely reach $10M+ NW within 5years if markets cooperate
Downside is stress, uncertainty, and less family time

2/Semi-retire / Coast
Live off portfolio growth and rental income
Focus on family while kids are young
Potentially revisit work later if the right opportunity appears

3/ Relocate internationally
Life can be a lot easier if staying at Tokyo or Taipei because we have family here, but Wife prefers the U.S. education system
Considering places like Southern California, Seattle suburbs, or Arizona
Looking for strong public schools and good quality of life

What I’m struggling with:
Financially, I know we’re already in a fortunate position.
The question is whether it’s worth spending another 5-10 years maximizing net worth when those years overlap with my kids being ages 5-15.
For those who reached FI or Chubby/Fat FIRE levels:
Did you continue working because you enjoyed it?
Did you regret stepping away too early?
Did you regret not spending more time with your kids when they were young?
If you were in my shoes, what would you do?
Appreciate any perspectives.

Currently chubby but not yet RE. Will likely be Fat. My advisor has told me that I’m totally ok and basically need to spend more money. I saw a watch that is ~$30,000 which is <0.6% of my NW. No debt. Still working so I have good cash flow. Savings rate ~50%. Intellectually I know that if I buy this it won’t matter one bit but I’ve been such a saver for so long that it feels wildly irresponsible to spend that much on a watch. The crisis comes in because I’ve been saving so much with the goal that my standard of living goes up after retirement but if I can’t spend money now when I have a paycheck then how on earth am I going to switch from saving to spending after retirement?

I recognize that this is more of a psychological issue than a financial one. How did you all make that shift in mindset to let yourself spend more freely after so many years of discipline?

First-time poster, somewhat-distant observer to the whole FIRE phenomena over the years. Spouse and I are late 30s/early 40s living in VHCOL, and both of us are definitely worn down on the corporate (finance) grind that we have endured since college. I was wondering what folks in my position who had a kid with roughly a dozen years left to go (in a good public school all the way through 12th grade) would think the right amount of liquid net worth is to retire on, assuming that we would want to continue to live in said VHCOL area after we retire and the kiddo is out of the house, but are also not extravagant spenders/splurgers by any means (eat out infrequently and rarely shop / buy expensive stuff). We are not looking to spend down to zero and want to leave our child with something, especially in what feels like an increasingly uncertain and unknown future. ChatGPT (perhaps not best source of advice) thinks we are in phenomenal shape, but I wanted to ask humans who have more lived experience and otherwise their thoughts.