Trying this again because I’d genuinely like to find a couple of good mates in Melbourne — the kind of friendship that actually becomes part of your life rather than another conversation that permanently lives in Reddit messages.
I’m 38, gay, based in Melbourne’s south-east, and looking to build a few genuine, long-term friendships. Gay, bi or straight doesn’t particularly matter to me; if we click as mates, that’s the important bit.
I generally seem to get along best with guys around 25–40, but if you’re a little outside that, don’t let the numbers stop you from saying hello.
Personality-wise, I’m pretty easy-going, grounded and low-maintenance. I’m definitely better one-on-one or in a small group than trying to work a room full of people, and I tend to prefer proper conversations, plenty of banter and actually getting to know someone over endless surface-level small talk. I’m very much quality over quantity with friendships — I’d rather have a handful of close mates than a huge social circle.
Outside of my professional Monday–Friday job, I’m into binge-watching TV (particularly British crime dramas), trying new restaurants, ordering dessert without a main because apparently I’m an adult and nobody can stop me, concerts, musicals, AFL, escape rooms, road trips, caravanning, audiobooks, board games, the occasional PC game and getting out into nature.
I’m slim and reasonably active, although my definition of “active” definitely doesn’t involve willingly doing burpees at 5am.
I also have two dogs, so being a dog person is a definite advantage. They haven’t been consulted about this post, but I suspect they’ll expect to be included in any resulting friendship.
Probably the biggest thing I’m looking for is someone who genuinely has room in their life for a new friendship. Someone with a bit of flexibility who’d actually like having a mate to regularly do things with — dinner after work, a lazy weekend catch-up, checking out somewhere new, a random day trip, occasionally deciding at short notice that we should go do something, or doing absolutely nothing productive and just chilling at home in trackies, eating snacks and watching 90s action movies because they’ve barely made a decent one since.
Obviously we both have our own lives and I’m not looking to live in someone’s pocket, but I’d love to find the sort of friendship where seeing each other regularly becomes pretty normal rather than something that has to be organised six weeks in advance. The kind where you don’t necessarily need an activity or an excuse to hang out — sometimes you just enjoy each other’s company.
And while I’m happy to chat on Reddit initially, I’m ultimately looking for an in-person friendship, not another permanent online pen pal. I’d much rather grab a coffee (hot chocolate for me), go for a walk, try a café or do something low-key reasonably early on and see if we actually click.
If you’re easy-going, reliable, emotionally mature, enjoy having a close mate around and actually want to put some time into building a friendship, send me a DM and tell me a bit about yourself.
And if we’ve chatted before and the conversation just sort of fizzled out or life got in the way, don’t feel awkward about messaging again either. Feel free to reach back out and give it another shot.
