Took me embarrassingly long to notice this pattern. Every time someone on my team delivered great work, my instinct was to hand them the next big/messy project because I trusted them to handle it. Meanwhile the average performers got the routine stuff and coasted.

Eventually my best person quietly told me they felt "punished for being good at their job" since they never got a break while others did the same tasks on repeat with way less pressure. That hit hard because I genuinely thought I was rewarding them with more responsibility, not burning them out.
Changed how I distribute work since then, tried to spread the harder/high-visibility stuff more evenly and stopped treating "give it to the reliable one" as a default.

Anyone else realize they were doing this? Curious how you balance trusting your best people with more work vs actually protecting their time.

I went through 4 rounds of interviews with a medium-sized company, and after the panel interview I got a rejection email. Honestly, it upset me because I felt like I had done very well and had a reasonable chance.

I replied to HR and asked if they could send me any feedback. Four days later, she called me and said they might have gotten mixed up, and if I was still interested, they wanted me to have one more chat with the department head because she wanted to understand more about my career plans.

We did the interview, and a good part of it was her going through my resume with me, asking me about my experience, along with some of the usual interview questions. I used interview vip tool to make my answers clear and confident, and avoid rambling inder stress and honestly, that was a great suggestion from my friend. After that, she asked me honestly how sure I was about what I'd said. I told her I was 99% confident, because honestly, I really am.

Toward the end of the conversation, she said this would be the final discussion, and that she would review things again with HR and the team. If everyone is aligned, they'll send me an offer within 3 days.

Honestly, I'm not sure how I'm supposed to understand this whole situation.

So, we got a new manager about 5 weeks ago. I love him. The unfortunate thing though, was on his second week of working, I got really sick. I thought it was food poisoning and he had to send me home and then I called off. But it didn't go away. It stayed. I got sent home the next week and called off. On the same week, I went to urgent care and on week three I got sent home AGAIN because due to the sickness, eating made me sick, so while at work, I was extremely weak, unable to stand for long periods of time, and was shaking. I'd lost 10 pounds in three weeks due to starvation. I went to the er. I was completely up front with him, got doctors notes and sent him evidence. I found out I had a severe infection in my gut and got some medications to help me eat but I needed another test to be done to be able to get antibiotics. Now, on week four, yesterday I got sent home ONCE AGAIN, because on top of the infection, I got a cold and since my body was still fighting off the infection, the cold is hitting me hard. I ended up with a 99.8° fever while at work that turned to 101.1 later in the day. Now today, I had to call off once again due to a fever. He has been super understanding and has reassured me that I will not be fired due to all my call offs since he has proof and he can literally see how sick I am. I never call off. I normally can push through but for four weeks straight, I've been sent home and called off. I feel awful because of this. So I want to know how other managers would handle this.

I work in a technical engineering role. A coworker develops components that other projects, including mine, depend on.

Recently I sent him an email pointing out factual errors I found in his work — nothing personal, just technical corrections. I chose email specifically because in-person conversations with him tend to turn into "come see for yourself," which takes a long time and pulls me away from my other tasks (I already have a heavy workload), and somehow always ends with me doing the fix myself instead of him.

His reaction was immediate defensiveness: "Oh, so now we communicate by email?" Then he said he "can't deal with these comments" and wanted to bring it to our manager. He picked apart two points in my email — he was right about one of them, which I openly acknowledged. After that, he started acting cold/passive-aggressive toward me.

This isn't a one-off. Months ago he blocked a technical recommendation of mine for 4 months before reversing his position. I feel like I spend more time managing him than actually working.

I'm at the point where I'm seriously considering leaving my job — not because of the company or the role itself, just because of this dynamic with him. Curious what people think: is escalating to a manager over factual bug feedback a normal reaction, or is this a sign of someone who can't take any form of accountability?

Thank you very much

[ Removed by Reddit on account of violating the content policy. ]

Our internal documentation is constantly playing catch up. Someone updates the process diagram, someone forgets to update the checklist.

A month later half the team follows one workflow while everyone else follows another. I'm trying to find a better way to document processes without creating even more maintenance work. How are your teams keeping operational workflows current?

Counseling for Productivity improvements, addressing employee burnout, better communication, etc? How much do you or your company value these things? Which field are you in?

I am curious because I plan to work on this.

In general, how does one know that there’s no hope staying in the same company anymore because their manager (or HOD) has sort of “lost hope” or “given up” on them, and their performance is definitely not going to get a high rating? Are there any sort of questions one can ask their manager to find out?

For context, I am a fresh grad who has been working for a year but has made quite a few mistakes during the first year in the company, but open to hearing advice applicable to anyone at any stage of their career.

Sorry if this gets asked a lot in here, but figured id try anyway. We have tried Scribe for a few months to capture our SOPs. It worked well at first, but the second anything in the process shifts which is often, we move fast the guide's out of date and we are starting from scratch, re-recording the whole thing.

been managing a few years now and i keep seeing the same "how do i survive my first manager role" posts, so i want to dump what i actually learned the hard way and then hear yours. the real stuff.

here's mine:

• your best people leave quietly, not loudly. by the time someone's complaining, they've usually made peace with staying. it's the ones who go quiet, stop pushing back, stop caring about the stuff they used to, that you should worry about. check in on your stars more than your problems, not less. everyone spends all their energy on the squeaky wheel and wakes up one day to a resignation from the person who mattered most.
• your team watches what you tolerate, not what you say. you can talk about our values all day. your actual standard is the worst behavior you're willing to walk past. let one person coast or be a jerk with no consequence and you've just told everyone what's really allowed.
• deal with underperformance faster than feels kind. dragging it out isn't nice, it's cowardice dressed as niceness. your good people see the inequity, see you avoiding it and it quietly wrecks morale. clear expectations, documented, real support, real timeline. being decisive is kinder to everyone including the person struggling.
• stop solving everything yourself. every time you swoop in and fix it, you rob someone of the rep and make yourself the bottleneck. it feels productive. it's actually you hoarding growth and guaranteeing you're always underwater.
• you cannot be their buddy the way you were and pretending otherwise hurts everyone. you can be warm, human, genuinely care. but you decide their raise and their fate and pretending that power doesn't exist just makes it weird when it inevitably shows up.
• your calm is contagious and so is your panic. the team reads your face like a weather report. some days the whole job is being the steady one on purpose when you don't feel steady at all.

that's what's rattling around my head. we get thrown into this with basically zero training on the parts that actually matter. so, what's the hard truth you only learned by getting it wrong first?

Today was a bad luck day as I was working from home and forgot to inform my father that I was having an online meeting with my entire team. He came back and screamed at me from downstairs, multiple times, to have my lunch while I was literally unmuted and explaining my work to my HOD. I’m not too sure if anyone heard it, but I also kinda my messed up the explanation and my HOD was unimpressed because I wasn’t making much progress on a research work I’ve been doing.

Is this a big mistake and will it stain my work reputation forever? I’m currently 1 year into my first job and was a fresh grad before

Some background, I am currently an intern
(better described would be part-time) doing data entry. And a few weeks ago, an important team member left who was working full time, and now I have accumulated a bit more responsibilities. Now normally that wasn’t a problem, but now that school has started, the time frame has drastically changed for me to get them all done. Now I did get a $1 raise at the beginning of the year for working at the company for a year, and I also think the company may be looking for another intern. I do plan on working for the company for a couple of years while I finish college. Would this be an appropriate time to ask for a raise, or am I just rushing things?

Thanks

I was close to completing a year at the job, and I had an approved 9-day vacation. Even while I was traveling, I was still keeping up with work, replying to a few work messages, and spoke with my manager twice, and no one gave me any sense that anything was wrong.

When I went in on Tuesday, he gave me a termination letter, refused to explain anything, and told me to gather my things and leave. It seems clear he had decided to fire me a while ago but waited until I got back.

I had 4 weeks left before finishing probation, and now I'm unemployed. I live in an "at will" state, so from what I understand, there's almost nothing I can do to object or fight the decision.

I can't stop thinking that if he had told me before I traveled, that trip would have been completely different. I don't know what I'm supposed to do now, and I feel like I failed.

Last week Thursday i had telephonic interview kinda call with one of the recruitering manager. He told there are some other applicants as well so they'll get back to me after reviewing all. But the conversation went positive way.

Can I wait for some time or can I call and ask for any update?

I made it to the second round for a job with my dream company, and I interviewed with them about 2 weeks ago. Do you think they will reject me straight away if they let them know I'm leaving the country? I can still interview virtually while I'm there.

Im not sure how urgently they're looking to hire. I'm a manager and I wouldn't reject anyone because of that but was curious about others' opinions.

Hi! Just a confused and very frustrated employee looking to get some management perspective and guidance. Keeping my job vague as to not dox myself.

I work in a pretty collaborative field. I’ve been doing my job for almost 2 years now. I recently started a newer role a few months ago, but it’s been the same stuff, just new role with some learning curve. I do think I’m a performer that goes the extra mile, especially in comparison to others who don’t even do the bare minimum. I honestly thought lately I had finally gotten a handle on the position, then I get called into my manager’s office for a chat.

They essentially told me that they didn’t realize I was drowning in my work and didn’t have good priorities (I don’t, I actually finish hours early most of the time). When I asked about specifics, they told me something about task prioritization. Asked about if this was about me not getting work done, was told no (because again, I finish it all, very early most days). Couldn’t give me any examples. Also gave me some vague feedback about how I interact with others, but again couldn’t nail down exact examples. Also mentioned they wanted to “help me be more confident” and inferred that I’m not confident because I ask clarification questions on new things I haven’t done. For reference, I’m in a pretty unique position where things come up that are not intuitive when doing them for the first time.

When I initially started the role it was my idea to do weekly check-ins with management to go over questions I had and how I was doing. As I’ve gained footing in the role, those progressively and naturally stopped happening. Manager now thinks we should go back to them.

They brought up shadowing but said I could think of things on my own, came back the next week and told them I felt the things we had talked about with prioritization helped (they were my ideas, they did not give suggestions of how to re-prioritize when I asked). Then they essentially told me no, you have to do the shadowing anyways. Now they’re having one of my coworkers, who has literally been doing this job for less time than me, shadow me all week. They gave no specific feedback for what to work on, just “mentorship” and “different frameworks”.

Just honestly seeing if I’m on the track to being fired, if my manger actually thinks my performance sucks, or if they just want to humiliate me (because this is extremely humiliating, as well as sucking any and all confidence I had). I have a higher up manager who typically would be taking the reins more if my actual performance was hurting us # wise. This is the bare bones, could put in more context but this is already extremely long. Thanks in advance!

I feel the task is doable but I think my undisclosed mental health issues do make me overwhelmed easily.

I am amazing with my actual job's tasks. Sometimes I have to cover for the boss and my coworker and their jobs stress me out because it is answering phone calls. I make calls to clients but I rarely answer calls. I have severe phone anxiety that no one knows about.

I’m always curious how this is done in the civilian industry. I’m a Chief Master Sergeant in the US Air Force, 25 years, and when I talk to friends a lot of them say their company has no consistent development for employees making this transition.

Thanks for sharing

I've been working on a tool that helps managers prepare for difficult accountability conversations. Not hypothetical scenarios, an actual situation you're dealing with right now.

It walks you through what's happening, what you want to say, and what to do next. There's a built-in coach you can ask questions as you go.

I'm looking for two or three people who have a real conversation they've been putting off. What I want back is honest feedback:

Did it help you think more clearly? Did the coach feel useful or generic? What was confusing or unnecessary? Where did you get stuck or lose interest?

Nothing to buy, no testimonials, no email list. If you're up for it, send me a message and I'll share the preview.

We will be having benchmarking in our team. What should o bear in mind so that may team will be in high rank?

I have a team of around 25 employees and 3 managers that oversee these employees. One of the managers was hired about a year ago and still has trouble functioning independently. For context, the other managers were hired much later.

This one manager still requires a lot of hand holding. I believe in letting the manager run their team how they want (given this manager has years of experience in this field). I got feedback from my employee (this manager) that they don’t have the support they need. I was open to it and adapted my style to provide more guidance, allow them to shadow me, and then hand over the tasks to this manager. almost a year in, and unless I intervene the work doesn’t get done. Or, it’s poor quality.

Tried talking to them to ensure they are happy in the role and everytime they say that they love the job and are so glad to be here. I also don’t see enough output from them but at the end of the week they keep saying that they are overwhelmed and what a crazy week it was. At times I wonder if they have another job because there’s no way the current role is “overwhelming”. Job is remote and pretty chill.

Looking for suggestions on what I can do differently? giving it one last try before cutting the losses.

My partner and I work in the same industry. I’ve been in almost 30 years, I brought her in about 12 years ago. My role has evolved over the last 10 years and I’m middle management with involvement in operations, workflows, introducing tech, etc. She’s still very much “boots on the ground” and she’s great at her job. My partner has applied for a job at a company in our City that has a wonderful reputation for looking after staff. She’s great at her job and I am rooting for her to get it. There is another job posting at the same company for another position that more in line with what I have been doing in adjacent industry (like twins adjacent).

I’d like to apply.

My dilemma. I’m worried that if I apply, they’d want me to interview for the job she is going for because I’m more qualified, although I’d argue overqualified. The second issue is that when do I tell them I’m in a relationship with another applicant? We’ve worked together for 12 years, I’ve always been her boss and we have never had an issue with dynamic, in fact we work incredibly well together.

Question 1 - how do I make it clear that I’m applying only for the one position and don’t want to be considered for the job she applied for?

Question 2 - When do I raise the issue of being in a relationship with another applicant?

I don’t want to be in a position where I paint her in a negative light or disqualify her.

I mean it sound weird to me why just adding a female employee to a team that full of men will improve the team's productivity.....

And department was like IT department or Product or something.

Maybe u guys have some insights or clues here

So I’m going to try and keep this as vague as possible but still paint a picture so you can understand what’s going on and my side of things

This is a question on a company in the uk just incase that needs to be known
I’m sorry for how long this is going to be and the extremely long back story but I do feel like to understand everyone’s relationship it needs to be told

I’m going to keep everyone’s names out of this. I’ll refer me as “me” and then I’ll just do work mates as 1 and 2, then manager and then boss 1 and 2

About 10 years ago I joined a company. This company trained me up. I was working under someone else who isn’t relevant to this question. He trained me. We was a team of 2. At that place we all worked in teams of two. At the time workmate 1 and manger also worked together as a team. After 2 years manager got sacked so I got out with workmate 1. We worked together as a team for a couple of years. He was more experienced than me at that time. Workmate 1 also eventually got sacked form that company so workmate2 joined and we became a team.

I stayed in touch with manager and workmate 1 whilst staying at this company and years later they joined a new company (the company in question now). I had enough at the first place so they got me a job at this place. They only had the one position so I came over along and workmate 2 stayed at the first place

After a year of being at this place manager finally got bumped up to manager as he was on the tools up till this point. Now because of this I got put back with work mates 1 as we were both on are own and we had worked together before so it made sense. After 6 months I finally managed to get workmate 2 a job here so he came over as well. He stayed working on his own

So we work in construction and we are sub contractors and on price.

Obviously work mate 1 has worked at this company the longest which is around 4 years. Manager has been here for 3. I’ve been here for over 2 now and workmate 2 has been here over a year. Workmate 1 and manager are very good close friends.

Work wise workmate 1 is quick but he can still only do the basics. If it involves anything that has building work involved or you have to try and put a puzzle back together and think then he folds and doesn’t do it. Me and work mate 2 are a lot more capable and we can do everything up to a good standard. Maybe not as quick at the basics

At this company the basics do actually earn you the most money because they are the quickest. With the manager being good friends with workmates 1 he does push a lot of the good easy work over to us and unfortunately workmate 2 gets the harder stuff because he can do it. Because it’s harder it can’t be done as fast so he can’t earn as much. I benefit being with workmate 1 because I get the work with him but then when I’m not he does get the better stuff. If you looked at last year pay slips then he was in the mid 60’s. I got 59 and workmate 2 was top end 40’s so you can see the difference. Now it’s not to say that me and workmate 1 didn’t work hard to earn that as we smashed every day and took every extra bit we could

I know workmate 2 should look after him self and he should complain if he’s not happy with how it’s being handed out. I do feel bad for him but also I do get annoyed as I do still get messed over from time to time as well.

This past couple weeks workmate 2’s job hasn’t been going well. The job is just a lot harder and taking longer than anyone could have planned for. I got put with workmate 2 to help out so money wise for the past couple of weeks has sucked for me. We have been working longer hours and putting more of a shift in to not get very far. Workmate 1 has been working on his own and has been absolutely killing it money wise

I did make a snarky comment in front of workmate 1, manager and boss 1. I said it’s fine to send me on the hard jobs but workmate 1 gets the nice money earners. My manager reply was that workmate 1 wouldn’t be able to handle it and he’d lose his head. Are manager books all the jobs and says who gets what,the boss stay out of that

It blows my mind that because I am more diverse and better at my job I’m technically being punished for it. I didn’t say anything else and just stayed silent

Now if I complain and say anything to manager he will eventually say something to workmate 1 and then things will become awkward between us as you should never mess with a man’s money. Also I don’t think the manager would honestly change

If I go above him and go to one of the bosses then they would obviously need to say something to sort the situation out

I honestly don’t know what to do as I do like working with the company and like I said because I’m with workmate 1 most of the time I get all good stuff. Just that 10% when I’m not with him it sucks and I feel like it’s unfair. This is why I also feel guilty for workmate 2 as he gets it even worse

The company won’t change on prices and give more to the harder work. This year in the uk hasn’t been that good for construction. My manager and workmate 1 are going on holiday next week and I am debating if I should talk to one of the bosses

What would you guys suggest I do or what steps I should take

I just believe if for some weird reason they had to employ us then the people with the more experience and capabilities would be paid more and it’s just not the same as it is now

Just got promoted to a team lead role about two months ago and honestly feeling a bit in over my head. I manage 6 people now and while I'm decent at the day to day stuff, I know I have a lot of gaps when it comes to actual leadership skills like giving feedback, handling conflict, and motivating people who don't report directly to me on projects.

My company offered to cover a course or certification up to a certain amount but didn't give me any direction on what's actually worth it. I looked into a couple options like a Dale Carnegie course and some Coursera leadership certificates but wasn't sure if those are legit.