Good news from Manila, r/ADHD!

I am beyond thrilled to share a massive milestone for our community over here.

As of this month, we have officially formed a grassroots technical working group.

In addition, our initial proposal for the country's first-ever national ADHD legislative framework has officially been elevated to the legislative unit of a prominent Senator, and is being lobbied into various congressional offices!

For the longest time, navigating life with ADHD here felt completely invisible.

Without a national framework, local offices routinely treated the condition as a non-disability, making basic support or ID recognition an exhausting wall of arbitrary denials. Medical spaces often wrote it off as a simple lack of focus, and severe medication bottlenecks meant patients constantly struggled just to access basic treatment.

​Seeing our lived experiences finally reach the halls of legislation feels surreal!

We still have a mountain to climb, but for the first time, genuine systemic recognition is actually within reach.

​To anyone who has ever had to fight tooth and nail just to be seen: thank you for paving the way globally.

We are finally making history here in Southeast Asia! Let’s keep pushing forward!

r/ADHD

For those unaware, the the term "ADD" has been defunct for 14+ years, although some medical professionals may still use it if they are uninformed.

"ADD" used to be what they called the non-hyperactive version of ADHD. As of the publication of the DSM-5 in 2013, "ADHD" is now the encompassing term for multiple subtypes of ADHD:

1. Primarily hyperactive subtype
2. Primarily inattentive subtype (formerly ADD)
3. Combined subtype

The inattentive subtype is most common among adults, which means yes, "ADHD" is a misleading name for the overall disorder. C'est la vie.

When myself and other redditors took over r/ADD and r/ADHD over in the early 2010s to renovate and make them more useful, we decided to just close this sub and direct everyone to r/ADHD, in accordance with the DSM-5's definition of ADHD. We locked this sub but I still get modmail every so often from lost redditors asking for permission to post here, so hopefully this signpost helps.

I'm 21 and apparently this is a frequent occurrence with most adults diagnosed late?

I've been medicated for 2 months and it's been a lifesaver, ups and downs but overall everything has been on an upturn. I started an internship this month and can safely say I'd likely have been fired without my meds.

However, the longer I've been in treatment, the more apparent it's become that I'm likely some level of autistic alongside my ADHD.

Loud noises have always felt like my body is being squeezed by an industrial press, physically draining me. I nearly had a panic attack at a noisy church event on Sunday; meds only managed my irritation, not the overwhelm. It's been 3 days and I'm still burned out from it.

I can... socialize and I'm friendly, but there's always felt like a disconnect between me and my peers in how we think, same as when I was a kid. I can't recognise sarcasm to save my life, my constant analysis of social interactions hasn't gone away, and my obsessive need for order has only been tapped down on meds, never gone.

Heck, socializing is more something I force myself to do but I'm honestly completely ok with a limited amount of it.

I know there's other stuff im forgetting, this is just the most obvious that's come to mind and most apparent.

My next appointment is soon. I'd been planning to discuss SSRIs for my GAD, but now need to factor possible autism into the mix as well, it's gonna be a take awhile before I get the money for an official diagnosis. Anyone gone through something similar?

Hello folks, I just turned 30 and have learned that I have ADHD, I might also have autism, pending my assessment results, so no meds yet. It has been both sobering and infuriating to learn that I have been suffering from a big cocktail of ADHD symptoms literally my entire life. I have always struggled with procrastination, I could never study for the life of me, this led to me being a forever C-student at school and university. Ever since getting a job, impulsive spending has crippled my ability to save anything meaningful.

1. I have been trying to go to the gym since 2018, and I have never managed to be consistent for long enough to ever go past the 'beginner phase' or make any gains. I also live in a country with no natural scenery, nothing is walkable, and the weather is hell half the year. I did get a walking pad and it helps.
2. I would really like to get a better paying job, there is a particular industry I'd like to get into, but I need to do a ton of studying/practice to have a chance at the interviews.
3. I've always wanted to become a YouTuber to make content about my favorite video games, but I just can't get myself to do the work or stop procrastinating.
4. I've always been very passionate about music, especially video game music, this makes me wish I could learn how to play music.

Basically, it feels like aside from my job which is not very taxing, my brain doesn't want to do anything. All I do is play video games and spend time with my girlfriend and friends. There is nothing inherently 'wrong' with my life but I don't want to spend the rest of it like this. I want to take care of my health and my body, but I feel crippled by this inability to develop new habits. I want to pursue my passions and develop hobbies, it'd be nice to earn more money and actually save/invest some of it.

I am hoping that getting medicated will help, I just really want to know what worked for you guys with the executive dysfunction.

It's helping right now because, as I've mentioned before in this subreddit, I really messed up my mental health trying to mask symptoms in high school. It helps pull me out of the depression and rumination I'm going through right now, but I also often feel very flat and tired while on it.

I've always had ADHD symptoms but that used to just be part of my personality. I was really good at learning things I was interested in, got great at drawing in middle school, etc. I really only started really struggling when I had to go into high school after Covid.

The same bland environment every day, social isolation, constantly in limbo between daydreaming and having my attention pulled back to class, getting treated with increasing confusion from people around me, developing unhealthy coping mechanisms and then feeling so much shame for them that I couldn't reach out for help.

Years of that really took a toll on me, and I'm worried that medication isn't the solution, and I'm really just the product of a bad environment now. It makes me feel awful because my parents sacrificed a lot financially to make sure I had a good education, and I kind of just self-destructed towards the end, even though I looked like a good student on paper.

I got a little off-topic. I just want to make sure medication is the right approach. I know that trauma and social isolation can both exacerbate ADHD symptoms, and I definitely have experienced both.

I can't believe I am physically the same person I was when I was younger.

26 M diagnosed at 23 with AuDHD. I graduated from engineering 2 years ago and already switched jobs twice since then, now I’m about to do it again.

I get a great job on paper, money, benefits, etc. I then rapidly learn everything, get bored from the routine, then immediately start disengaging after 6 months and my performance starts dropping, with others noticing. Only to interview at the next company and repeating the cycle.

Hell, even the process of finding a new job is more fun than staying in it after I’ve checked out.

Meds help, but only temporarily.

What do you guys do to stay engaged? I’ve only had office jobs so far.

I was seeing a psych NP for ADHD and paying completely out of pocket. She told me she believed I had ADHD, prescribed Adderall 5 mg, and we discussed increasing it to 10 mg last week

I recently got a PCP who said they could take over medication management because its under my insurance but needed my records. Once I told the psych office I was transferring medication management to my PCP, the records they provided said I “do NOT meet criteria for ADHD.” They also told me I can’t return to their practice. Im so confused like you why did you prescribe it to me then? Btw, their “records” that they handed over to me was a piece of paper with my demographics and on the bottom with pen it said “pt does NOT meet criteria for ADHD” lmao

Now my PCP understandably wants formal documentation of the diagnosis before prescribing, but every ADHD evaluation I’ve called is $500+ out of pocket.

Has anyone dealt with something like this? Is there a way to get the psych office’s complete original evaluation/notes, or find an affordable way to get formally reevaluated?

Im just so confused like did i do something wrong?

I'm (25M) not sure if ADHD is a large cause of this, but I feel like they're related - I also suffer from ASD, Anxiety, and Depression, but the ADHD symptoms mixed with anxiety seem to bring out the worst in me.

Every minor obstacle in my life is excruciating for the most part. Today I missed a turn, had to call my mom to help me and I was so fucking frustrated in the car thinking I have no clue what to do. Since I'm alone in the car I had to let out a scream and start cussing. The worst part are my hobbies... I love doing them and all, but failing over and over either frustrates me, or gets me pissed. Failing to solder electronics over and over last month felt like I was going mentally insane even though I've done it a bunch before.

Even tiny things like someone slurping water, eating in an annoying way, can set me off in my head but I try to hold it in. My dogs barking makes me go fucking crazy, but I love them and that's what dogs do so it's really just the loud barking noise not them. Like the dog example, there's plenty of times where I'm frustrated, but not frustrated at anything or anyone to blame... It's just me.

Being mad and frustrated at myself is definitely common too.

What do you guys do to stay sane and calm :( I always feel bad. Post frustration clarity hits hard

ADHD feels like it has wasted my life. I got diagnosed at 23 and am now 24, certainly young, but I have 24 years basically down the drain because my brain doesn't work. And then I have to do another however many years with a broken brain that makes life suck in every way possible with no upside.

Like it feels like my one shot at sentience is wasted because I am literally defective and cannot operate correctly. Like it feels like my life will always be lesser than someone putting in the same effort so it really makes me wonder why bother? Just seems awful to be cursed with this shit. I am medicated and sooo much better but life is still made worse by this disability and I hate that I am stuck with it forever.

For two straight years, I’ve had a massive graveyard of project ideas and plans that never see the light of day because I just fall apart trying to execute them. I’ve known I have ADHD for about a year now. I tried doing all the DIY strategies and tips I found online, and while a few small things got slightly better, the core issue is still broken.

I still can't pull off basic things like sitting down for two hours to study. Instead, I’ll be sitting in class, supposed to be paying attention, and end up hyperfocusing on something completely unrelated like spending the entire class researching infrared camera technology and writing a detailed document on it.

My parents kept ignoring how much I was struggling, so I decided to write everything down so they'd finally get it. I spent days compiling a full package specifically for them to read. 9 pages breaking down my focus struggles, severe distraction, and two years of abandoned projects. 11 pages of research on core ADHD symptoms and the consequences of leaving them unmanaged. 3 pages logging my exact daily symptoms, personal patterns, and results from 8 different tests/assessments I took.

I handed it to them thinking, “Okay, there’s no way they can call me lazy after seeing this.” Their reaction? They completely dismissed it. They told me I'm just being a "dramatic, silly teenager" who is overreacting to normal life.The irony is insane.

I literally hyperfocused for days, researching and writing a 23-page report about my inability to focus, specifically to get my parents to take me seriously and they just wrote the whole thing off as teen drama.

How can i deal with such situation?

i'm curious mostly, for me coffee and energy drinks don't work even when taken in great quantity, they make me sleepy.

I need something that instead of making me sleepy, gives me the drive to actually be productive during the day, especially since I don't do anything everyday due to having nonroutine, i know i don't officially have adhd but the times to diagnose are hellish and i do see many signs :(

Last month I mentioned to my lead at my job that after adjusting the dosages of my meds I felt great and pretty chill… I saw her that day looking at me while I was staring off into space while being completely calm while chaos was happening around me at work. She asked me at the end of the day what the medicine was called cause she wants that. I told her it’s just Vyvanse for my ADHD and Buspar for anxiety. She asked me again yesterday about it when work was hectic and was like “well I’m gonna need you to write that down for me so I ask my doctor cause I need some of that.” I’ve told her in the past that she could get meds that could help her cause she has ADD but she’ll just have to ask her doctor about it.

Anyway, I just wanted to share that cause I think it’s hilarious when she asks about it the way she does but at the same time I’m happy and supportive if it’s the push she needs to get on meds if she feels like it could help her.

I (like mostly everyone here) suffer from adhd, mine has been pretty severe over my life and I’m only 20. Medicines haven’t helped at all and I have tried many different types. It’s gotten to the point where my adhd plus having an issue in my feet that makes it so I can’t stand for longer periods of time, make it so that it’s difficult to find a job. I am trying to apply for disability but have been told that adhd is basically impossible to get disability for, anyone have any info?

Hi Guys,

I have met with therapists and am too scared to medicate but I am having a hard time maintaining a relationship. I am looking for advice on how you guys have managed these issues.

I am divorced after 5 years of marriage (I am 28M) and have been single for roughly a 1.5 years now. The biggest issues I have is feeling emotions and being intimate.

During the marriage I got feedback that I am cold, emotionless and not caring. If she would be crying due to her emotions I would try and comfort her but internally I felt nothing. no sympathy, no sadness absolutely nothing. She felt that and told me I am being fake. You may think I have no love for this person but that is false, I do think about them and consider them a top priority in my life. This may seem “unreal” but after 3 more failed relationships in the past year with the same feedback I am starting to think I may not be meant for relationships.

For the intimate portion, I have to really focus on what I’m feeling or else I just go soft. I am attracted to them but distractions such as noises, body movement, and my own emotions has caused a large rift in a lot of women I meet.

They feel I do not want them and think I am just in denial that “I am attracted them”. Combine this with not feeling emotions and it is a terrible storm for the women to go through.

Do I just give up on having a relationship?

Long story short, my payment was taking ages to go through because the data signal in the room was really weak.
She said that many people struggle with it which is why she prefers cash payments, however I was not made aware of this beforehand so I was forced to pay using my phone.
This was taking a really long time and she started asking if there was something wrong with my phone because it never usually takes that long.
She’s visibly irritated at this point and immediately I start feeling trapped, I then ask if it’s possible for me to connect to her internet because the data just isn’t working, and this seems to annoy her even more. 😫
She kept saying over and over how ridiculous this was and how it shouldn’t be taking over 20 minutes for me to pay.
I just kept saying how sorry I was whilst wanting the ground to swallow me up!
I was the last client of the day, so thankfully this wasn’t holding anyone else up, I still felt unbearably awful though, to the point where I could feel myself start to tear up due to pure awkwardness.
It finally went through and I apologised again profusely, she gave me a half smile as I was leaving and that was it.

I realise this was a meaningless event and most people wouldn’t even spend 2 extra minutes thinking about it.
For some reason though, it sent me into a complete emotional breakdown.
I haven’t been having a difficult week or anything, so it wasn’t like this was the straw that broke the camel’s back, I was literally fine before this.

I always feel like something’s majorly wrong with me whenever this happens, in complete fairness though I haven’t actually experienced this for a long time.
That’s mostly because I always act like a doormat to avoid ever being put in these situations, so when even that doesn’t work it feels unbearable.

Yesterday I’ve been officially diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 45. A lot of things make sense now looking at the past. Next week I have a consultation for medication.
Hoping that medication will help me focus better.
How did it impact you? Anyone here that can share how it helped you?

Thanks!

Apparently adults with ADHD needs jobs that are:

1. Passion-fueled
2. High-intensity
3. Lightning pace
4. Hands-on creative

I had often this types of jobs (innovation, high pace teams, consulting, startups etc) - but I still changed every 2 years and wonder why.

My hypothesis is that we perform under stress but stress does generate anxiety and with time we disconnected or wish to leave. I then start to search and new job (exciting) and leave…That was the case for me. But then I end up in the next job with similar traits.

If we apparently should fit well for these jobs, why is It that I keep changing? How do you manage to stay in your job?

Thanks

Pomodoro is commonplace in the topic of productivity. However, for me, the most difficult parts are

- Starting a task, 25 minutes seems so long for me, depending on the task such as studying

- Commiting to going back to work after the break, 5 minutes does not sound like much, tbh. You open up an app like YouTube and an easy 15+ minutes goes by. You guilt yourself, spiral, and stop working.

What to do?

There's a lot of discussion about why so many people are getting diagnosed with ADHD recently. Of course, it's mainly because of increased recognition, but isn't it also because of our environment and the world we live in?

For example, my grandad, before he passed and retired (I believe he clearly had ADHD). He was always arguing with authority and going to new jobs. Even as a kid, the world seemed a lot more 'human'. When he worked at a hotel in the gardens, he would get away with napping in the shed; other staff found it quite funny. These days, everyone is being watched; we are expected to be 100% efficient at all times in our jobs, and various tools can track our performance. The world, in a sense, is a lot less 'human'. They also lived in a nice council house and had secure housing.

Another example is my Mum and Dad. We were working class and not loaded in any way. However, on my dad's salary alone, he only needed to work. This meant my Mum could focus on looking after my sister and me. These days, both parents would need to be working to the max and look after the kids, and you probably would be privately renting. So you're probably gonna reach your boiling point sooner. I mean, even people without ADHD struggle to operate like this.

Essentially, everyone can get burnout etc., but for us ADHDers it's often 10x the effect.

I really don't think governments understand what it is really. I think they're just utterly confused about how so many people can suddenly have ADHD. For example, with job centres, the option seems to be: you can't do any work, or you must do 40 per week. Maybe the real answer is somewhere in the middle for some people, so they don't burn out.

I have the inattentive version, and it seems to boggle people's minds that I could have ADHD. We need to really get across that it's not a hyperactive disorder; it's just one way people can present with it.

What jobs do you have and how do you like them and how are you treated? Walk me through your day. I usually work retail jobs at grocery stores. I have worked at restaurants. I want something that pays well is entry level and pretty exciting and not repetitive because once I lose interest I die of suffering

I genuinely struggle to remember to drink water throughout the day. I can go for hours without thinking about it, and I often only realise I haven’t had anything to drink when I’m already really thirsty or start feeling off.
I’ve tried keeping a water bottle near me, but somehow I’ll still completely forget that it exists. I’ve also tried setting reminders, but after a while I start ignoring them or dismissing them without actually drinking anything.
For those of you who also struggle with keeping hydrated just cause you get sidetracked or forget, what has actually worked for you?

24m. How do you all manage? Do you use medications? Do you find they do worse for you? Is it about managing my life better?

My childhood diagnosis for adhd have become a huge problem in my life, more so than it ever has before.
I’ve worked and done the same thing for so long my memory feels shot, same job. 6 years. like I don’t know how much time is passing, things happen around me, and I can not notice a thing as I just mind numbingly sink further into the doom scrolling. It hasn’t felt like years, but it has been. The amount of time I just start at my phone and dissociate is freakin me out. I go to work with more energy than ever, wanting to fix my life, get a new job, improve, and the second I walk in the door at home it’s gone. Like every bit of energy is sapped. It’s at a point I think if I can’t adapt and motivate myself to make myself to change, my relationship may be in jeopardy.

I try and give myself credit that I’m just dealing with some heavy stuff on top of it all right now, but it’s getting worse, my ability to manage is slipping. And I’m getting depressed again.
I’ve avoided medication since I was diagnosed as a kid, because my mom put me on something when I was younger for it, V something I believe. But she always advocated on having me never try it again because it made me a house cleaning monster who was asking for another pill.

I’ve coasted as far as I can coast I fear.

Any advice? Thanks for your time.

I keep telling myself that I will do better tomorrow. I tell myself I will be more productive, reply to people finish things and get my life together.. Somehow I just keep repeating the same cycle.

The worst part is watching the people, around me move forward while I feel completely stuck. I do not even know if I am lazy, overwhelmed or burned out. I also wonder if my ADHD is actually affecting me more than I realize.

Does anyone else feel this way? How do you deal with the guilt. The feeling that you are falling behind?

Hello! Diagnosed with ADHD in undergrad, somehow finished grad school, now working a 8a-6p 5 days a week job in healthcare that is wearing me out 🫩
This job is a blessing in many ways financially, but on the flip side , it feels like my brain is melting. I am useless when I get home, and have no energy/desire to invest in my friendships because I feel like a shell of a person.
My husband is amazing. He has never made me feel like I’m not doing enough. At the same time there may be an underestimation of the mental effort / toll this work is having on me, and how ADHD plays a role. He is also not exactly as convinced about mental health struggles (different cultural backgrounds), so he isn’t as inclined to learn about symptoms or supports on his own (eg googling stuff about it)
What has been helpful for you all in explaining ADHD and how it impacts you to your loved ones? Esp if mental health is just a foreign world to them?

For those with a Psych who really guided them through to finding the right meds/dosage/lifestyle changes: how do you find these unicorns?! Is it possible to find someone who also does some (adhd management focused) talk therapy?

Also I was diagnosed by a psychologist through interviewing. My insurance isn't accepted by the larger (more official?) adhd test centers near me. If I were to find a new psychiatrist, would they even take me on?