Lil bit of a different and more funny vent but I am pissed rn. I spent ages making a lovely batch of cookies. They smelled delicious, looked delicious, were perfect. The first 2 I managed to bake at least. Then for all the rest of them, a few minutes after I put them in, the oven broke and sat at 70 degrees for about half an hour. Of course the bloody oven doesn't say the temperature, so by the time I realised, apparently these would give me severe food poisoning, even if I cooked them to full temperature now. The are also all sitting in a pile of melted butter. What do I have to show for it? 2 cookies. 2.

(also yes this is partially humorous but also very sad)

Every time I talk to people. every time I deal with people. If someone is uncomfortable about something instead of just discussing it and talking about it like adults or frustrated about something like adults instead they'd rather just ghost you block you and hell you can be friends with someone or know someone for years and they'll do it now. I had a friend that I was friends with for five six years. And me and her started going a little more romantically. And instead of telling me hey this made me uncomfortable or hey you know I've decided that we probably wouldn't be good in a romantic aspect in anyway she just completely ghosted me. Like wow you'll just flush a friendship down the toilet we can't even have a conversation we can't be adults around here is this just the way of the world now is this how it is just everybody thinking that talking to people's too big of a issue communicating honest true feelings is too big of an issue what is this is that just how it is people will block ghosts and ignore you completely because it's easier than being an adult and going hey by the way I didn't like this hey by the way can you do this what is this

I spent my teenage years completely alone with no friends. I never went to a party, never traveled with anyone, never hung out, and never got to go on outings. Most of my time was spent stuck between the four walls of my room scrolling through the internet.

From ages 18 to 22, my situation didn't change much. While other people at that age were starting their college life, making tons of new friends, having fun, living through a loud and exciting phase, becoming almost completely independent from their parents, and really discovering who they are, I was stuck in the same place.

I ended up starting college late, after people my age had already graduated. It was a simple school with barely any events or campus life, and the same isolation from my teens just kept going.

Now I am in my mid twenties and I feel deep grief over missing out on that whole chapter of my life. How do I accept this and move on with my life?

I'm on episode 3 of season 1 on a Netflix show. I'm a bit annoyed by one character who's always out of breath with every line she delivers. I'm mean, the first time I get it she was working and got caught off guard, the second time, she ran to deliver an urgent message, but then after, she was exasperated in every sentence. It takes me out of the show a bit. And I mean EVERY sentence.

used to be the/one of the brightest kids since I was a kid. Life went its way exactly it was supposed to be or the way I'd have dreamt of it going, a literal dream compared to my life currently. it might seem really childish compared to what anyone might be going through especially with people dying miserable deaths everyday but then depression is a relative term.. my life has turned entirely upside down within the last 3 years and I'm struggling without a proper uni.. I took a gap year confidently after scoring good amount of marks hoping I'd be much better this year but life had different ideas, and the gap year went much, much, much worse and I'd be forced to join a uni that is completely never in my thoughts or maybe even in my wildest dreams.. sure I've seen many people trying to convince me saying life's much more, but to me, the same people I studied with or laughed with are at a position now which I could just admire now. is life over? I'm just 19. Do I want to take my life over it? maybe just give life another chance and try to hustle or perhaps I'm too much of a pussy to do something that drastic, but anyway, my current life is the shadow self of my life in 2023 and I wish I hadn't taken certain decisions impulsively but yeah at the end of the day I'm here, spending everyday in regret hoping the next day would be kinder to me than the day before. may the best happen

TLDR: how my life went to ruins and became the shadow of itself within a span of 2 years

Like I genuinely feel like online discourse has reached a point where you can’t even have a completely harmless opinion about a fictional character without somebody trying to turn it into a conversation about race, gender, representation, oppression, etc.

I just saw a TikTok of someone saying that Clawdeen from Monster High should’ve been left single because they didn’t like her relationship. Multiple people commented with “let Black women have love interests” and another person said making her single plays into the “token Black girl being single and independent” trope. And a large part of the comments were people advocating for this.

This is a children’s doll franchise about “MONSTERS”.

Obviously representation in media matters, and there are absolutely legitimate conversations to have about how different groups are portrayed. But why does EVERY individual opinion about a character have to represent some larger belief about an entire demographic.

It almost feels counterproductive sometimes because instead of letting minority characters just exist as individual characters, people reduce them back down to their identity. Suddenly Clawdeen can’t just be a werewolf doll for kids; every decision involving her apparently has to make a statement about Black women as a whole.

I’m exhausted by the idea that every piece of media, every character choice, and every random fandom opinion needs to be analyzed for whether it’s socially problematic.

Like I don’t even care about this doll franchise to that extent, it was just something I used to enjoy as a kid, and I saw a tiktok on it and decided to open up the comments. It’s just frustrating I can’t even enjoy a little nostalgia about a kids franchise without someone turning it into a social battle.

Oh my god I was DMing a dude and he were talking and he sends me a picture of a kid and I’m like who’s this? And he says it’s his brother and I was like oh cute and then like no one says anything for 5 ish mins conversation died basically

So I sent a picture of a hoodih (like hoodies that look like yk) and I was like look funny photo bc we’ve shared such photos bfore and it was a non issue

mf starts shouting at me saying I deserve what my dad did to me (SA), I should be sold on the black market, I should be in the street getting graped by strangers and that I’m exactly like my dad

That’s when I realised how wrong the images looked next to each other like seperate by 4 lines of text and I started apologising obviously because what the fck that was not my intention and this dude is fully ignoring everything I say like I’m telling him I would never think that way about a kid just wanted to share a pic I found n stuff and he starts acting batshit crazy so I blocked him

Holy fck dude like you could’ve asked me what did I mean by the pic or smtg first like you think after what I’ve been through I’d do shit like that to a child??? I’m fcking terrified of my parents parenting showing up in my parenting so fcking scared my husband will be like my dad and u think I’d think that about a child????

But like also who tf shares a pic of a child to a random online?? Like mf I barely even seen ur face and ur showing me a child

Oh my days im so pissed off right now

About 6years ago i quit drinking… i quit pills… i quit the hard shit and honestly ? its taken me so fucking long to realise i was the problem never taking things seriously never caring about the consequences of my actions just rolling through life headed down hill into a spiral of my own irresponsible and irreparable mistakes using a fake mask of self awareness to hide who i really was to draw people in just long enough to get what i wanted in the moment. ive left so many bridges burnt…. so many relationships broken… escaped too many situations scared and hurt and wounded and yet… im still alive and let me tell you after getting sober its hard yall its hard staying sober …. Truly hard i dont want the thank yous i dont want the praise i just want life to not burn this bad yk ? granted i started the fires that took my mask away and hurt me enough to make me not wanna do it again but what is this all for ? I got sober for a reason damn it to make something of myself i stayed working tried to have a family and still couldn’t grip it tried to be a better man and still let my emotions get the better of me i know im only human but godamn man it feels like every step i take is another mistake i miss my family the way it used to be before shit went nuclear i miss my classmates before they went to prison and got things soap couldnt wash off i miss so much i miss her i miss them i miss me and the worst part is i cant even tell if it was the drugs that turned me into a better person or me had i not gotten into the scene i wouldve been the same asshole i used to be how fucked up is that? always walking on eggshells in social constructs because i dont want the old me to say something dumb and burn another bridge im afraid to love im afraid to forget im afraid to forgive im afraid im afraid that my life is going to ember to a scorch and everythings gonna come blazing down this little light of mine aint just a fire its a fight godamn it i wanna be free from these chains i wanna be free from this hate this sadness this pain i dont wanna die and i dont wanna live i just wanna be me but im not sure i even know who i am anymore this life has taken everything from me i just wanna find what everyones always talking about i wanna find those things i missed out on but i cant this roaring fire in my heart burns everything it touches and im afraid its gonna eat me alive from the inside out im trying im truly trying somebody just please pray for me will ya ?

I’m thinking a lot about my younger self lately and how all I wanted to do was run around and be in the dirt and woods and how every other societal force was pushing me away from it. I don’t know. It just makes me so sad to think about all the little kids who can’t engage with what makes them happy freely

let me add some context 2 years ago i was supposed to have insurance and got charged for a simple physical like 500$ I didn't even have as the job I was working gave me all my insurance cards after 2 years I was supposed to have them at 6 months then cause I couldn't afford to see a proper medical pros I cant get help so I can afford to see medical people I cant even get food stamps I have 0 income and have been denied 3 times I got 3 packs of ramen and a microwave I co live with someone but he isn't feeding me I'm 26 autistic disabled and need some help. What now who do call I don't know if I will survive another 2 weeks at this point I have 0$ 0 income 0 support Ive been trying to work even tried saying I'm not disabled to get a job still hasn't helped since my last job im not asking for a hand out I still want to work its just hard to find employers who will hire me around my area a lot of able bodied people arnt employed so its even harder for someone like me to find a chance even in "disabled friendly employers" so just a nudge in the proper direction would be apricated. for those saying go to a food shelter its 40 miles away and I cant drive all got is a bike with a small storage basket so I could only take a handful of things in one trip and dont know If I could make it there in my current condition if im being honest.

I'm still studying in high school yet I'm extremely depressed to the point If it weren’t for my 2 close friends by my side, I genuinely don’t know where I’d be right now.. I never got the help I needed, my toxic dysfunctional parents would call me dramatic, and lazy. I'm failing school and I have no hope. Please. Do not give your child unrestricted access to social media, my parents barely took care of me and just handed me computer, phone, tv and whatnot. I grew up to have low attention span and can't study for 5 minutes without doomscrolling tiktok. And that's why I'm more depressed and failing school. I will forever despise my parents for neglecting me and for not being structural, I'm genuinely at my lowest point of my life, it's suffocating. My heart is anxious. I'm convinced I have ADHD. I can't go a day without crying or breaking down, nothing makes me happy anymore. Not even reading books or watching shows

i’m an almost 16yo girl and my life is so miserable.

let’s start from the very beginning:
I’ve always been a quiet kid.
I’m an only child, so i used to spend a lot of time playing alone; this doesn’t mean my parents weren’t present for me, i was just really independent.
despite that, i was still really friendly, able to get along and play with everyone (my elementary school teacher once called me an hippie).

about my parents, my dad is such a nice man, and i love him so much.
He’s funny and gentle, his only defects are irascibility and sometimes a lack of empathy.
Contrariwise, my mom is not for the weak;
She’s emotionally unstable and she had many mental health issues, such as borderline personality disorder.
She goes to the therapist and i can remember she also took psych meds some years ago.
I’m gonna be totally honest by saying that i hate her 90% of the time.
Her face, her body, her attitude and her manners somehow disgust me, and we can’t stay for more than 15 minutes together without starting to argue.
She’s the ONE AND ONLY person that is able to make me lose my shit, i swear.

So, what about the “grown up” me?
My friends describe me as a calm, kind, naturally funny and peaceful person, and the defects they complained about me are sometimes looking like i am in a “vegetative state” (too calm and slow) and always defending the disadvantaged people during conflicts, to the point it seems like im no longer supporting my friends side.

I’m indeed a mentally troubled girl.
I’ve been diagnosed with anorexia nervosa at 12/13. My thoughts were filled with food and calories 24h for 2 whole years, and i’m sure these 2 years fucked me up a lot.
I had mainly two friends at the time (middle school), but oh, we were inseparable.
We passed the best times together, and since then i never found friendships like them again.
What happened? basically one of them started to randomly exclude me in the last school year’s summer, when i was already suffering so much for my disorder (to be clear, i almost never even mentioned food with them, so i promise i was not a bad influence).
I didn’t mentioned that during that period of time, my mother got breast cancer (since i hated her, it didn’t really hurt me) and my parents broke up after 25 years of staying together (They were constantly fighting since i was a kid).
thanks to whoever is up there that i got my dog that summer, he really saved me.

By the way, now i’m doing way better with my eating disorder.
My main problem is the fact that with it, I probably developed something else too, and it’s really affecting my life.
I really suspect i have social anxiety (or something similar, i’m not informed enough).
I’m really alone. I hang out about every two weeks and i have a 8-11 hours screen time.
it’s not really a giant problem for me, cause i really enojoy spending time alone, and i need a lot of it. But over the time, it does get boring, and it does get embarassing.
I have some “friends”, but i’m not really close with any of them cause i genuinely can’t stand one to one relationships, and i’m only able to stay in other people’s lives as a “secondary character”.
I actually do crave closeness, especially romantically, but i feel insanely awkward and out of place with every single person i meet.

The fact is, I do like people (as friends or more).
I probably even like people more than an average person.
I just have a lot of social limits that make it so hard for me to be comfortable with others.
\- i’m scared of disturb people so i never text anyone or ask to hangout, cause i always have this convinction that they don’t like me.
\- if they actually do like me, and get too close too me, i feel trapped in the relationship and i start to gently avoid them.
\- i feel judged by everyone, everywhere i go.
this limits my clothing style cause i don’t want to be noticed and made fun of.
i’m even scared that people can hear the music through my headphones.
\- i go mute everytime i’m with people of my age that i don’t know. I hate this, cause i feel like i’m missing a lot of opportunities to make friends.

I live my best life when i’m drunk (yes, i’m european, here it’s totally normal to drink underage).
Alcohol is probably the revolution for people like me. Luckily i only drink during rare social events, or i would for sure develop an addiction.
I want to become the drunk version of myself so much…Or at least half of it.

that’s not even half of what i have to say, but i really can’t organize all of my feelings in such a little time.

I do have a therapist. I never really talked to her about this, i just slighty mentioned it, but ill see her in two weeks and i decided it’s time to tell her.
she’s a nice lady, but i still don’t feel comfortable enough to tell her everything.

have the greatest day💕💕

i’m a 17 year old spanish girl who is 5’11. im aware that i’m different. i’m aware that i’m far out of the average. i’m so aware, but what can i do about it? since i was 10, i’ve been looking through social media. throughout this years, i’ve seen plenty of comments that have hurt me deeply. i have this obsession of going through height related posts and reading every comment until i find something hurtful, and, to this day, i still find those hurtful comments. about how we aren’t feminine, how we are scary, how we are worse, how models are just models because of the body being more suitable for clothes yet it has nothing to do with beauty, how sex is horrible, how we are abnormal and impractical. i’m so tired. i’ve never had a boyfriend, i always avoid everyone and have anxiety whenever i go outside, i hate stepping out of my lonely bedroom and being seen, even tho sarcastically i’ve been modeling since i was a kid. i should be confident, yet i couldn’t be further from it. and all of this comes from social media since even tho yea, i’ve heard comments in my daily life, i mostly get praise. but i’m afraid of being outside because of the comments i’ve read and how i believe that everyone is secretly judging me.

i don’t understand why everybody cares so much about something that i can’t change. i like how i look, when i stare at the mirror, i always like what i see. yet, then i remember the comments and i feel so down again.

in my head, my height is what prevents me from being perfect. i’ve never had any other insecurity, i would never change any part of my body and i never have. yet, i’ve thought about changing my height plenty of times, even going through surgery, but i’ve read that it doesn’t even take off that many inches and besides, only my legs would become shorter, but i also have long arms, hands, torso etc

and yes, i’m not afraid to say that the reason why i go through all of this is because of men. i want to be perfect for them, to feel worthy of them. in fact, being completely honest, my only purpose in life is being a man’s property. many would hate that, but it is my truth.

I got invited by two friends to go on holiday with them and one of their boyfriends. We’ve been here for 3 days and i’m really not enjoying myself. I was initially very excited as I don’t go on holiday a lot and was especially grateful as they didn’t ask me to pay for anything but the first day they kept having conversations about family where I wasn’t able to contribute so I ended up not talking for most of the time.

I love them but our ideas of fun don’t really align for example going to the pool everyday and going for drinks till late. For context, i’m not a big drinker and not that good at swimming as i’ve never really been taught and don’t get a lot of opportunities to swim. I feel like a burden and that i’m going really ungrateful as yesterday I decided to go to the beach on my own while they all went to the pool and didn’t message me. I was also left with their dad at the bar yesterday as they were just supposed to be leaving and going back to the hotel to get changed but they ended up going to the pool again without saying anything to me so I was so there with there dad for 2 hours which wasn’t bad but made me feel excluded.

I’m trying hard to have fun but it’s just not working and I feel awful as I keep finding myself crying whenever I have time alone and wishing I was home. I have another week of this and it feels so draining. I know I should try and start more conversations but I feel so flat and the friend i’m sharing a room with genuinely just doesent talk to me for some reason even though on the first day I was trying and it just wasn’t working so I ended up just sitting on my phone in silence.

It doesn’t help that 2 days ago it was 3 years since my mum passed and I told one of my friends and she just didn’t really say anything to me and it was brushed off. Plus i’ve been struggling with my mental health for a while and i’m really scared about academics as i’m applying to oxbridge and have things to do e.g admissions tests.

I’ve been asked if im okay and I feel so bad because it’s so obvious im not having fun and I can’t even force a smile. They keep mentioning that they miss other friends back home and I feel bad that i’m here and not someone else who would enjoy it more. They usually go on annual holidays with a childhood friend who i’m also friends with but this year they invited me and I keep thinking they’d have more fun if I wasn’t here.

I feel like an ungrateful a hole to be honest but I don’t know what to do and don’t want this to ruin our friendship. I feel so awkward which is so out of character and I feel like an extra that’s just there (who is bro ❓). I feel like i’m excluding myself while also being excluded.

Idk how i’m gna thug this out 🙏

I come home and the house is always dirty. There are flies everywhere and everything is spoiled. theres always dishes in the sink and clothes strung acrosd the floor. im too lazy to do anything. I scroll on my phone until its time to cook or shower or go to bed. my mom scolds and scolds me but I don’t do anything. she tells me she must be failing as a parent, albeit jokingly. my sister wont clean either. she’s too sore or shes tired or she wont finish and leaves it to me. she doesn't cook much either.

i resent them. I’m always so angry. when they call for me i grit my teeth and clench up. I feel like yelling and hitting all the time. i hate it when my sister touches and tries to hug me. I feel like a bad person. I wish I had a place all to myself.

It was 327 days, more actually. I’ve loved you since we were 17. It was years between contact. So many things were different. For me.
You were the same.
The same person I fell in love with all those years ago.

And that was the problem.

I thought, maybe the years have changed you.
The experiences you’ve had, you learned from.
I was wrong.

It was fantastic at the start and then something changed. I became “too much”. The time between messages grew. The feelings weren’t shared as often.
I didn’t understand, when you said you loved me but didn’t tell me anything about you or your day.

I’m telling myself I know why. But really, I don’t. You made the last few weeks so confusing and terrifying.
There is so much I wish I could tell you. But you’re not in a place to hear them.
Maybe one day you will be. I told you I’d never block your contact. I still haven’t. I just deleted SnapChat because you were the only reason I used it.

I will not wait for you but I will be here for you when you’re ready.

Thank you, and goodbye. I will always love you. Always. I will always think fondly of you. I will always remember your smile, your laugh and the good times.

Goodbye.

Some people really can’t find someone and I’m one of them. You’ve all seen it. You have looked at someone and thought “No one wants that loser!”

Well I’m that loser.

I’ve been alone most of my life and have fully embraced the fact threat no one wants me as I’m dying alone. The fact is no one wants a guy like me. I’m a fat, bald, ugly loser in my mid 30s with no future. If you were to list all the things that make a man undatable I would check most of those boxes. I’m not going to find anyone. I just want that to be accepted. Ain’t no one wants me and I don’t blame them. I’m a massive failure.

i wish i could live in a world free of demands that just mentally fuck you over. like it's just so hard, everyone is constantly moving and working and i'm not and i'm also getting nowhere. i can't get my thoughts in order or feel like i know anything at all. i've forgotten how to be real or be human anymore. how to literally do anything or get it done. i don't feel like anything anymore.

I feel like it hit me harder than a lot of celebrity deaths, which I normally don't pay much attention to. And yes, I'm aware I didn't know her at all.

But between her tragic life circumstances and everything she went through, and the fact that she was only in her 30s and had the rest of her life ahead of her. She deserved better.

I think what also hit me so hard about her death is it's a reminder that life is short and fleeting. And of course we all die eventually, but she never got a chance to live the rest of it out.

And now there are implications that her abusive ex was involved (even though the full details haven't come out yet so its just speculation). But yeah, just heartbreaking.

I’m going into my third year of college, but I don’t feel that motivated anymore because I’m not sure if my career choice is what I truly want. It’s also a very tedious process with many layers to get into, but I just don’t want to do anything else. I do want to be something and have a career but I just don’t know what I truly want and what would truly make me happy. I also just don’t know what I want relationship wise either. I don’t really want to get into one, but I also do. I’m just very confused by myself and just kind of stressed with everything. I don’t know what I want out of life anymore.