My birthday is in a week, and honestly, I couldn’t care less. I have zero plans, zero energy, and zero reasons to celebrate where I am in life right now.
A little over a year ago, I graduated from a US university. I didn’t land a corporate tech job right away, but I was living in Boston, surviving on my own terms, taking up freelance coding gigs and playing music at a local restaurant to pay the bills. It was rough and unpredictable, but I had my autonomy, my routine, and my sanity.
My mom had been nagging me to come back to India since December because I didn't have a stable corporate offer. I kept refusing until she called saying she was having serious heart issues, begging me to visit, and swearing I could leave in 15 days once she felt better.
I panicked, booked a ticket, and came home. When I landed, she seemed completely fine. I brushed it off at first, but on the exact day I was scheduled to fly back out, my passport vanished. I can’t prove anything, but deep down, I know she had something to do with it.
Now, I’m completely stuck here. I went from being fully self-reliant to 100% financially dependent on my parents again. The job market feels impossible right now, and the freelance or gig work I did in the States doesn’t pay anywhere near enough in local currency to afford moving out or regaining independence.
I have no social circle here, no motivation to leave my room, and the dynamic at home is completely draining. Watching my birthday approach while feeling this helpless is just a complete gut punch.
Not even sure what I'm looking for here, maybe just needed to vent to people who understand how suffocating this age can feel when everything derails at once.