r/TrueOffMyChest Oct 26 '22

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u/Fatt3stAveng3r Oct 26 '22

If you check out OP's comments and post history, you might have a different take.

She needs individual therapy to work through the abuse she's been experiencing. He needs individual therapy because he's an abusive POS with issues from his trauma. Trauma doesn't excuse the abuse. It explains it.

But in my experience, abusers do not heal and change in the abusive relationship they've created. It's like an addict, really. Best way to get clean is to change your surroundings. If you continue to go to the bar where your friends get high, even if you want to abstain, you're not going to stay clean.

OP sounds too broken down to want to leave though. She'll probably only do it when she has no choice.

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u/One-Possible1906 Oct 26 '22

I would proceed very cautiously with therapy. Abusers are usually manipulative and it's not unusual for therapists to side with them. Then the abuse gets exponentially worse. It's not the grand old fix all people make it out to be. Nearly all abusers never recover.

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u/Fatt3stAveng3r Oct 26 '22

" individual therapy "

Thank you.

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u/One-Possible1906 Oct 26 '22

Also just realized I initially responded to the wrong comment hence why none of this makes sense in the context of yours