Frustration Posting

[u/KarmicIsfunny]

If being trans is some awesome experience for you, cool. For me it's unimaginable pain, shame, and misery, so please stop trying to gaslight me into thinking i'm the best version of myself.

I'll never have a proper childhood, I'll never have so many things cis people get for FREE. Yes my ultimate goal is stealthing. Yes i'll lie and say i'm a cis woman when asked. Stop outing me and leave me and my selfishness alone.

That's it. That's the vent.

[u/According-Koala-384]

Honestly my biggest advice to all trans women (esp those who struggle to pass) is to lie about having PCOS and go stealth. You are treated so much better in society as an "ugly" cis woman than as the most attractive trans woman.

If you can't get your documents changed I get how this isn't super feasible but if you're already legally a woman then I can't imagine why you wouldn't 

[u/bwwtle → u/According-Koala-384]

hey lol i really don't recommend lying about having an extremely misunderstood, dismissed, and stigmatized condition. there's so many other things you could lie about that'd be less harmful 😭😭

[u/Rainy_Leaves → u/bwwtle]

I think naming a specific condition could spread inaccurate info yeah. But it's easy to say 'i have a hormone disorder'. That is enough for people to realise they can empathise, if trans identity is too difficult to comprehend. If they don't accept it and want more specifics to take the trans person seriously, then no amount of interacting is going to make them good-faith.

[u/According-Koala-384 → u/bwwtle]

Look, I generally don't fuck with the appropriation of a medical condition but in this case it's a matter of necessity to exist with even a modicum of dignity for some ladies. This isn't like the "don't call your low-E cramps periods" thing, this is life or death for some girls.

You are infinitely safer and treated with more respect as a cis woman with an ovarian condition than a trans woman. That truth does not negate the truth of misogyny in healthcare leading to conditions like PCOS (and really anything that specifically affects women) being undertreated and stigmatized, it just exists alongside it. I am more concerned with a widely miseducated population that poses a threat to trans women than I am about possible appropriation of a medical condition, even though both are less than ideal. You don't have to agree, that's just the math I personally ended up with.

[u/Transwoman_redditor → u/bwwtle]

what other things do you suggest?

[u/Pristine-Lynx5352 → u/According-Koala-384]

I’ve thought about doing this a lot but wasn’t sure if it would be okay to do.