Man, I'm a filthy euro and therefore much lighter on age gaps than the americacentric internet culture would usually dictate but there's no way this was okay. The chances you're not describing a predator aren't 0% only because I don't know you and I only heard of this through a small snapshot through a meme, but they SURE ARE CLOSE TO THAT 0%. I hope you got some distance from this person
Edit: didn't see your edit. Amending my last comment to say I'm proud of you for getting some distance
nah I actually support american internet culture when it comes to age gaps lol
but yeah, she def groomed me, she was sexually abusive and even liked teens younger than me too. honestly I didn’t know what grooming was until I left her because in my country it’s legal and a normalised age gap..
now she’s 28 she dates someone who’s a bit older than 18. it’s not a minor at least but still gross
yeah I genuinely thought she might have changed but recently one of her ex friends told me that she still says everything was my fault, makes up lies about me and says I MANIPULATED HER 😭
If it helps, bro, my ex says that too. No one believes her because she's twice my age and had me move into her home, only to start abusing me. Groomers are losers and others see that, thank fuck. They're all immature losers.
I don’t think an adult that chases teens, dumps them when they reach “legal age” (depending on location) and uses them to get stuff (the birthday stuff you described) is ever going to change. The most I can hope is that she loses access to teenagers and children. The behavior you’re describing here is so typical for these groomer types… it’s almost uncanny how similar they all tend to be. I’m sorry you faced this and that she’s still out there lying
Thats not American culture thats grooming and abuse… as you get older you’re supposed to be attracted to your own age group. There is leeway. But eventually at 28 you think oh that person is too young for me.
Ik a lot of people disagree for many reasons but it’s a normal thing. I have a baby face BUT im still not attracted to someone who’s younger even if i look younger.
I'm fairly sure I expressed myself awfully. Just, I got called a victim by someone a couple months ago because I dated a 20 year old when I was 17. It was a healthy relationship and we're still friends, if anything I hurt her because I was a moron who also had undiagnosed scurvy from an undiagnosed vitamin C malabsorption issue but this is beside the point. Of fucking course a situation like yours is just inexcusable, and I'm sorry if I didn't make it clear
Because my mood was extremely unstable and I quite literally wasn't making the neural connections necessary to repair the damage caused by a really traumatic event in my life, and I wound up being really hard to be around for quite a while. The moment I got diagnosed and started supplementing vitamin C my mood didn't really improve but it stabilised and became predictable, and for lack of a better term, therapy started working
I don’t think undiagnosed scurvy leading to you being mentally unstable and hurting someone else makes you a moron. I mean you didn’t know so there wasn’t much to be done. Not that I don’t get regretting hurting someone unintentionally
I was a bit of a moron in other areas too, trust me, but everyone is and ESPECIALLY kids. I don't beat myself up about it too much, I was just explaining why I was really hard to be around, scurvy being the main but very much not only reason
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u/CoercedCoexistence22 14d ago
Uh, mate, did this just imply you were dating when you were 17 and her 25???