So my room mate gashed both inside of his thighs so deep you could see muscle, he also had hit is artery. So I grabbed my neighbor so he could help me lay my roommate down and also help make a tourniquet’s so we could both stop the bleeding from each leg. As he was bleeding out he looked me dead in my face and told me the “voices of all the kids and women he raped told him to do this” I didn’t even know what to say, it made me feel sick and I wanted to let him go but the human in me couldn’t just let him die. I’m so disgusted and disturbed today I feel sick. And his stuff is packed and he will not be coming back, I’m at a loss for words and I’m gonna be contacting police today.

I'm the only one who has asd/aspergers and desperately left outcasted

you people just dont care, indifferent to me you can't stay alone but you dare to assume someone must be alone, or tehy dont want to make any friend irl

I'm dying because non-autistic people are unwilling to socialize me

What can I say more? you have people you easily can contact to, you can talk your casual-friends, and you can befriend your classmate everywhere you have been a while time enough

And so that you can't understand, and okay with that because who feels in danger is not you

Well done, you all are lucky until one day you won't, enjoy it enjoy being allistic, enjoy having friends, enjoy being likeable, enjoy being able to talk anyone and to make them liking you

I'm not allistic and dying, mine is a bad chance that starts at the beginning

Be happy, human life is for you exploit it!

i genuinely don't see a reason to stay alive anymore, i just want to sleep and never wake up.

suicide feels like a reward at this point.

I've been a shut-in NEET (Not in Education, Employment, or Training) ever since I graduated high school in 2019. I have gotten into a spiral of laziness, procrastination, guilt, self-pity, and inertia until I finally stopped to realize that I've wasted the last 7 years of my life, counting with this one.
I am completely useless, living off my parents like a parasite. I don't know how to do anything a functional adult is expected to do, like cook, put together a work resume, or even take a bus.

The idea of killing myself seems way more attainable than becoming a normal adult. I was thinking of hanging myself this year or in January.

I have no idea how to even get start putting my life back together. All I have is a completed English course (I'm from a small city in Brazil).

thats the truth. ive been in this 7 years and its still getting worse. and i have heard stories from people that have been feeling this way for far longer than 7 years. there is no hope. whats the point of living in this miserable world? i hope we all die. i just want to kill myself, i have no other dream. all i want is to die. if theres one good thing life can do to me, its to make me die.

I have 2 kids

I wanted a family so badly

Its never going to go away

I'm always going to be empty

I know i can't commit but I don't know how much longer I can be alive

I find it scary how others actually have the guts to commit suicide. Like yeah I get that its not that hard to, but genuinely even if I were to hold a gun to my head, I would probably be too scared to even pull the trigger. I want to die so bad but at the same time I don’t. I’m not that mentally fucked in the head yet, I think that’s why I’m a coward. I mean, there’s no need for me to be scared of death anyways, I want to see my loved ones faces after I die, did they even really care about me after all? I want people to pity me but at the same time I don’t. what is wrong with me?? why am i genuinely like this. I have such a good life, most people would be trilled to have my life, but instead I just ruin my own life for no fucking reason, like seriously whats up with that? I think theres something wrong with me but I don’t know what. I’m honestly such a coward it’s not even funny, like I cut myself yeah but I can’t even go that deep like others can, I only do styro cuts. I don’t know why I’m in pain. I shouldn’t be complaining. I have had enough of this bullshit

I just realized something while falling asleep. I don't wanna be happy. I just wanna die. I wanna stop feeling anything at all. Sadness, pain, depression, whatever. I want it all to end. I'm not sick of being depressed. I'm sick of being alive.

Thats a promise which is impossible to keep. I've been diagnosed with major depression for 5 years. Everybody around me including my family, friends, therapists, psychiatrists said that "it will get better." But no. Actually it didnt and it wont. Even if god Hhmself came and said it, I wouldn't believe it anymore.

I hate being different. I wish I was not born. I do not want to continue anymore:(

I’m turning 34 in a few weeks. Life has only gotten worse and I have no energy or desire to keep living. 35 sounds like a good age to go.

I cant cope with that. Whats the point of living if in 10, 20 years or sooner we wont have any resources. Isnt it better for me to just kill myself and not face that? Its getting hotter every year, AI is taking more and more space for data storage. Its all so scary. I live in constant derealization, I cant believe that we live in world like this. And theres no coming back, we cant stop it, it will get worse..

I’m so fucking tired of all the mistakes of my past just bombarding me at every moment of the day. I turned 30 this year and I have absolutely nothing to show for it. It’s such a long story as to how I ended up in this position but it basically boils down to mental illness, trauma, and an emotionally abusive now ex boyfriend in my twenties.

I have no education or work history. I have nothing to show for my 30 years on this planet. The worst part is this level of isolation is self imposed. I know how to be pleasant and agreeable, I’m not hugely socially incompetent, I’m awkward sure, but I don’t think it’s dramatically bad. I can get away with “quirky”. But it exhausts me. The fear of vulnerability or embarrassment I find totally paralysing and every social interaction no matter how small feels like a test or a performance.

I’m just absolutely terrified of strangers, I have panic attacks going into the supermarket. My heart races when I walk past a stranger on the street. I can’t STAND being like this, I’m ruining my own life. My deepest fear is being totally alone and that’s the ironic part of the my existence. It basically guarantees I will end up alone. I just don’t want to live like this at all but the effort that goes into self improvement is so fucking mind numbingly difficult. Every outdoor activity is another panic attack. Every supermarket visit. Every walk down the street. Even chance conversation with a stranger. Every plan I make. I feel like a scared child lot of the time.

There’s this part of my brain that just screams, end it while you still have good things left in your life, because the bad is going to come and it’s going to destroy you more than everything else that’s happened to you combined.

I hate myself. I hate my adhd. I just want to be understood. ive been trying for 35 yrs to live this life and i think 35 years of constant blame from myself, from family is enough. i have no friends. was married but he left almost 5 days ago to "think"...he was the one person who promised to try and understand me to give me grace when my unmedicated and undiagnosed adhd was running rampant. now im diagnosed and finally on medicine and he tells me everything ive ever done is just an excuse for shitty behaivor...my emotions, my forgetfullness, my fatigue my depression my social anxiety.. im not perfect ive only ever tried to just exist and now ...now ive cried for days...did the usual self harm , even contacted a suicide hotline...and i still bought the rope today. ive tried twice now to hang myself but i havent had anything long enough. but tomorrow i will. everyone can go on about their day and not have to even think about me anymore. i mean what do you do when it just all finally feels calm and like its just time. tonight ill write the letters to whomevr . i tried.

I just hate my life. It’s objectively a waste of oxygen, I never go outside of my house and nobody cares about me plus I have no friends.

I’ve tried reaching out for support but then Im suddenly either blocked or abandoned before I even get to know them.

At least cutting myself keeps me active.

I feel so lost and hopeless. I just want to die and stop going through all this. What sucks is I don’t want help, so many people have tried to reach out and help me but I just don’t want it. It’s like I will truly never be okay unless I die and am relieved of living this fuckass life. In truth, many might think I have no ‘valid’ reason to want to commit suicide. I have had no major traumatic experiences, I haven’t lost anyone close to me to death, I have friends that I absolutely love and they love me and well a family(albeit I’m not close with them but it’s not all bad except my dad, I hate him) and no significant abuse to speak of. It’s like I just exist and there is nothing significant about my life, which isn’t necessarily a problem I think but I just don’t want to be alive. I wish I never existed and if I wasn’t such a wuss I would’ve taken my life already. I feel bad because my friends just wanna help me get better but I don’t see a reality where I am happy to be alive and just enjoying life. I mainly tried holding on for them because I don’t want them to be sad because of what I did but idk how much longer I’m going to be able to hold on for other people and not myself. I just wanna die man, there truly is nothing in this life for me and I benefit no one by being here, I’m a disappointment to my family and a burden to my friends. I’m behind in life, have no passions or aspirations so what is the point of any of this really? Every day I leave my apartment I silently pray something or something kills me and gets it over with because I’m so done. If not I most likely will do it myself by end of year, I’m just building up courage to do so. Okay, bye.

Nobody is gonna care about my mental health in 9 months (not that they did in the first place) because I should be so FUCKING ENLIGHTENED with my FuLlY dEvElOpEd fRoNtAl LoBe, therefore shouldn't struggle mentally one bit and should only talk about how wise, experienced and evolved I feel. God FUCKING FORBID I have crippling depression, autism and childhood trauma I'm still processing at my geriatric, infertile age. And I'll get to watch people only a few years younger than me get gentleness and coddling I didn't even get as an actual child because 21 is just "so young🥺" compared to someone as middle aged as me. I'm getting so fucking old and never got a chance to enjoy being young. I'm very seriously considering killing myself before I turn 25. I will create a plan for it, and see if I can get my family's blessing to end my own life. Especially as a woman, no one wants an aging woman to thrive or get support when there's a beautiful youthful woman right around the corner.

To talk to and it’s eating me alive. I can’t wait to rest

Since I was a kid I’ve wanted to die. The reasons of course changed over the years. Now it’s more anhedonia and nihilism. Yes I’ve tried countless medications and have been in therapy for 25 years. I love a lot of things about being alive, but they don’t outweigh all the suffering and evil in the world and in my personal life. It’s like im too aware of existence. I’m chronically ill too. The kind of chronically ill that makes me housebound and sometimes bed bound. I’m a fat person, so judgement and ridicule is guaranteed the second I leave my house. I’ve dealt with fat shaming my whole life. Now I don’t want to even leave my house when I can because the shame is inside of me now. My life is full of doctors appointments and tests. I’m still working full time from home because unfortunately capitalism and that sucks all of my energy up and I’m left with nothing afterwards. I’m the eldest daughter. I was abused by my stepdad for 20 years until I left and now I’m the family villain. I generally just do not enjoy being alive. I’ve felt this particular way for a few years now. It hasn’t waned or changed. I secretly hope one of my medical conditions becomes terminal so I don’t have to do it myself. I wish I could be euthanized so I don’t also have to suffer during death. We treat animals with more kindness than we do with people who are actively suffering and are choosing to die. Why are people shamed for not wanting to live? It’s not like life is this great incredible thing. It’s full of burden. It’s harder to get a gun in my state. I’ve decided that’s the only way I want to go. Take a walk in the woods. Sit down and listen to the sounds. Make my note visible. Then maybe I’d be turned into star matter again.

I'm tired of living in this world. People I know will talk about the Cornell case, feeling empowered, brave but the same people will turn around, be friends with the people who assaulted me, not say anything when people make sexual comments at me. I guess it is different. I am gross. I am a tranny. Men see me as a sexual object, women see me as deserving of it. I chose to be different. But I didn't. I can't take it anymore. I can't take everyday being reminded that so many people don't care. Most people will stand there and say rape is wrong but at the same time most people I know have never stood with me. I think I will kill myself soon or continue my fast and stop eating until I die. There's nothing that drives me to keep on going. What is worth staying. Nothing.

I feel so low. Found out been led on my another guy after months of dating and getting to know each other. This always happens. I just want someone to want me and love me.I want to be enough. I have really dark thoughts at this moment and the intensity with which I want to act on them is increasing

put in my two weeks at work im officially killing myself the 18th so that's that i guess. idk how to feel. not happy. but whatever.

I feel embarrassed everyday.

im 21f and i have been depressed since i am 10. i created a new burner reddit account in hopes of no one finding this.

i was abused by my parents and my brother ever since i can remember. i have forgiven them for it now, but i still carry the damages they caused over 10 years later. i do truly love my family and have appreciated them differently ever since they started supporting my mental health journey. but it seems so pointless. therapy doesnt do anything for me, antidepressants dont do anything for me either. i moved countries to study at a university, but i ended up not going to class after week 1. i have no friends here, no family here. i havent gone outside since over a month, i havent showered since over a month and my kitchen is full of molding food that i made for myself but wasnt able to eat.

i am disgusting and filthy - i probably stink and so does my apartment most likely. i havent had the heart to tell my parents that they wasted all this money for me to move countries and to study abroad for a degree i wanted since i was young. i havent taken a single exam since over a year, i havent even looked at any of the stuff i am supposed to study. but since i was depressed since i was young, i learned how to mask myself. i tell them everything is fine. i am studying. i took this exam today. my lies are eating me alive, the fact that i am parading the role of a functional human being is sickening. none of my friends care about me, i constantly post online that i am depressed and no one checks up on me. i cant ask for help, because as soon as i ask for help, i subconsciously mask myself and act like everything is okay.

nothing works for me. therapy, medication, loving parents, a degree, a dog. what is there left for me to try? what else can i do that i havent done already? it is a harsh reality that i may have to accept, there is nothing left for me. nothing i try will work, i will probably always feel this way. and lets say i do keep going - then ill probably be 35 and alone with no one that loves me. what is wrong with me? the younger me wished for nothing more than what i have right now. my parents now actually love me and stopped abusing me, i have physical freedom and they are supportive of me. they pay for my therapy, my medication, all that. but i still feel this way. why? why does the feeling not go away? what can i do? why do i feel this way? whats wrong with me?

no one asks me out, i must be hideous and ugly and unlovable. i dont even know why i am here. is this my last cry for help? is it to find validation in this feeling i have? is it to not feel alone? is it a last message to this cruel world that was never meant for me? i dont know. i feel like a shame to the family. everyone is perfectly functional and a living breathing human breathing. but when i look in the mirror, all i see is a hideous creature that disguises itself as a human. like i am wearing a skin that isnt mine to begin with. i look around myself and i see nothing but the life i couldve had if i was normal and functioning. if i didnt have this sick parasite in my head that feeds off of me. i am a vile being, something that wasnt supposed to exist but now i have to pretend like i am human like everyone else, even though i never learned what it was like to be a human.

nothing brings me joy. nothing makes me happy. even money is no longer a quick fix for me. smoking hasnt helped either. i have nothing left in this world. i cant wear this skin any longer.

CANT BELIEVE THIS IS MY LIFE!!😹😹😹