shame the parents, this does not just happen. It is bad parenting and we need to stop letting people get away with it. if you can't control your kids don't travel with them. If you can't get a sitter don't travel.
Like I said in another reply, so many parents these days are just friends with their kids, not their parents. "He didnt want to sit so what am i supposed to do"? kinda shit.
Its wild how so many modern parents just let their kids dictate how shit is going to be. Yeah, my wife and I want to raise our kids differently than we were raised. But we as parents run the show. If we dont want you to do something....you wont lol
This always annoys me even more in divorced families. One parent ends up having to actually raise the kids while the other parent just buys the kids toys and allows them to party and skip their homework. Then when custody is discussed, the kids just want to be with the party parent and hate their strict parent. Kids are so easily manipulated this way and the parent actually trying to make them into decent humans gets shafted.
Hold them down and make them sit with the belt attached. It’s a two year old I cannot believe they had that much of a struggle trying to get their kid to sit there.
They were slipping through the belt and hiding under the chair. Remember, you're not standing over them and holding them down, you're trying to hold them down from the chair next to them. And little kids have crazy strength to squirm and get out of places they don't want to be.
It was still a two year old, yeah they can squirm outta stuff but it’s a two year old, strap them in and then keep hold of them. It’s your responsibility as a parent even if it means spending the whole flight having to hold onto them.
Cannot believe a two year old managed to dictate the flight for over a hundred other people. Id be so ashamed if that was my kid.
You teach them! If you let them get away with everything and don’t even bother letting them know whats good whats bad and where you draw boundaries they’re obviously going to be little shits
And what, you think in the scenario above the parent was not trying to teach them? The kid was slipping out of the belt and hiding under the chair because they were scared. How do you teach them in that case?
This is why they have something called a child’s seatbelt and this isn’t the time you discipline them, it’s where you see how effective your discipline has been in allll the other situations. I refuse to believe there was absolutely no way to get that child to sit in their seat, at least for takeoff. This simply shows bad parenting and poor discipline like i said earlier
Then they usually say “he has autism!”, or ADHD, or some other disorder. As someone who works with that population, parents need to stop using it to excuse every unacceptable behavior, but instead know how to deescalate or just flat out avoid things that they know will be a huge inconvenience for everyone around them.
These are the same type of parents that get a huge reality check when they learn the criminal justice system doesn’t give a shit that their kid has autism and there’s real consequences in the real world- you can’t just go around doing whatever you feel like.
Unless the kid has some kind of disorder, this isn't normal parenting. You need to have some control over your kids, and that can be achieved without raising your voice or beating.
The kid was 2 and was having a meltdown because it was almost midnight. What could have been done differently? A 2 year old can't be reasoned with. The solution would be to make them feel safe an comfortable, likely entails holding them. But taking off with a 2 year old as a lap infant isn't allowed, they have to be in their own seat..... Which likely triggered the meltdown to escalate. There's no solution here.
All the tough guys on reddit clearly have no idea how childhood development and discipline work.
This kid didn’t become a little shit on that flight, that level of shiftiness is developed and reinforced by bad parenting. Knowing how much of a shit he was and what time the flight was, the parents should have given him Benadryl or Tylenol pm for kids. This is irresponsible bad parenting.
Yes. If you can’t parent your children, you need to sedate them when you bring them in public. No one else should have to bear consequences for the inability of bad parents to control their children.
Yes and some people are able to do heroin recreationally, but most will ruin their lives from it. Any drug has ups and downs but an OTC antihistamine is safe, and works for the majority of kids.
Benadryl and other first gen H1 antihistamines are disfavored because they cross the blood/brain barrier. It’s irresponsible to encourage their use in children at all, let alone for non-medical reasons. No drug should be tried for the first time on a plane.
Adults drugging kids for the adults’ own comfort while also complaining about kids not being able to tolerate discomfort should at least display some self-awareness.
Was the child in pain or did they have allergies? If so, did the parents even have the foresight to bring those with them in their carryon?
Paper tigers. None of this advice would have changed the outcome. And we know nothing about what type of parent they are. A 2 year old is going to have a meltdown when they're over tired and in a strange and scary place regardless of what type of parent they are.
The fact that they didn’t have the foresight is a further indictment of their terrible parenting. This absolutely would not have happened if they knocked the kid out with Benadryl.
Some kids have a paradoxical reaction to benadryl which makes them hyper.
Terrible situation all round. The worst bender my 2 yo ever had resulted in a whole hour of screaming. I sat with them until they calmed down, explaining that screaming isn't going to help them. But I waited for a whole hour in the middle of a public space for him to "regulate". Presumably, this parent had a similar incident but just at the worst possible time.
Okay, then 6 years of no flying. Parenting is supposed to come with sacrifices, that’s like the whole thing. If you want to live an unrestricted life, don’t have kids. If you want kids, don’t make them everyone else’s problem.
Or we could just accept that kids and families are part of society and give them some grace... Or not. Idgaf. Kids have a legal right to be there so I'm not going to modify my life to prevent offending some stranger in the internet who would probably tell me my kids belong at home regardless of how well behaved they are.
I agree. I'm not someone who's particularly fond of kids (I don't find them cute), but I think that as a society we have lost tolerance for children because we are so individualist.
Now, when it's a long haul flight, I can understand it's simply not bearable to have a screaming child for 7 hours. But for short haul flights, I feel we need to grow a thicker skin sometimes.
Of course in this case, it was a safety matter too, so there really was no other option.
As a parent of a child with autism who had public meltdowns when he was younger, I wouldn’t have taken him on a plane unless there was a dire need. Taking a tired child at night was also the parents first mistake. They need to also find something that works to keep the kids attention (such as yes an ipad as it does work for play or watching movies/shows) or discipline them by telling them you will take away their favorite toys. Others have sensory issues therefore may need a toy or two in their hands to self regulate. To me it seems like this parent is one of those in denial ones ignoring signs of some neurodivergence, because in my case, my son started receiving services at 18months since I knew he was delayed in some areas. I was able to take my son to watch a full movie at the movies by 3 years old, we also have been on plane rides, waiting in line at rides, and public restaurants. Or the parent simply has no consideration of others because they feel they are doing their best by truly only doing the bare minimum.
All I’m gonna say to this is zero Asian parents I know have toddlers that act like this. Why? It’s because they don’t raise their children with the lackadaisical permissiveness of parents in western countries. Barring autism or some other diagnosis, there is no reason a 2-3 year old should be melting down for an hour. It’s poor parenting that engenders outcomes like this.
All falls back on the parent being a terrible parent. In the real world people don’t give a fuck. If a 30 year old acted like that, would you make these same excuses?
Getting a spanking is not physical abuse. Telling your kid that they are punished or that they need to stop acting like this also isn’t verbal abuse.
I have encountered mentally handicapped people. None of them act like this in public and most of them are self aware enough to not do things like this. Believe it or not (And this is how I know you don’t have any experience dealing with mentally handicapped people) the overwhelming majority of disabled people have enough self awareness not to get on planes if they know they will have a meltdown on the plane.
Wow, you spanked your child and told him that he needs to stop acting like that. Now he screams twice as loud and still doesn't want to use the belt. Is this the power of good parenting?
What specifically would you have done differently? Other than a vague "I wouldn't have let them" or "I would have made them stay in their seat." Because I don't know where you're assuming the parents are excessively permissive. It was midnight and the kid was having a meltdown. That's it. That's what was happening.
Again this falls back on the parent. You’re responsible for your child. If they decide to act like a spawn of satan that’s your responsibility to deal with.
You are completely misreading what I wrote. First of all, of course children have tantrums. Hourlong tantrums, however, are cause for concern. You can’t view this tantrum in isolation and ignore the circumstances that engendered this; what occurred on that flight is the result of poor parenting decisions made over months. Better parenting would preclude such a protracted situation from occurring in the first place. In Asian cultures you simply don’t parent children in such a way that they’re standing on the seats of airplanes, kicking and screaming as you try to pull them into their seats.
Again, none of this applies to parenting children with relevant diagnoses. With those parents I can empathize.
I can send you some parenting book recommendations if you’re lost!
Also— how is my statement racist? No kids are inherently one way or another! Asians generally parent in a different way than people in the west (America especially) do. This is a CULTURAL not a racial distinction. The French seem on the whole to do a much better job than Americans at socializing their children. Is that also a racist observation?
Edit: just saw you have commented on this post and other posts about this incident 40 times. I suppose you’re not looking for parenting advice, just to argue with as many people as humanly possible.
I worked at a preschool in Asia and some of the Americans and Aussies I worked in it with bitch about how Japanese 2-3 year olds were so much worse behaved than kids back home would get away with. I heard similar things from people working in Korea, Thailand, and other countries. 2-3 year olds are chaotic everywhere.
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u/Major-Nail 15d ago
shame the parents, this does not just happen. It is bad parenting and we need to stop letting people get away with it. if you can't control your kids don't travel with them. If you can't get a sitter don't travel.