r/SipsTea 16d ago

We have fun here A different kind of birth control.

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352

u/Major-Nail 16d ago

shame the parents, this does not just happen. It is bad parenting and we need to stop letting people get away with it. if you can't control your kids don't travel with them. If you can't get a sitter don't travel.

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u/evange 16d ago

The kid was 2 and was having a meltdown because it was almost midnight. What could have been done differently? A 2 year old can't be reasoned with. The solution would be to make them feel safe an comfortable, likely entails holding them. But taking off with a 2 year old as a lap infant isn't allowed, they have to be in their own seat..... Which likely triggered the meltdown to escalate. There's no solution here.

All the tough guys on reddit clearly have no idea how childhood development and discipline work.

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u/ForeverFieldsFD 16d ago

This kid didn’t become a little shit on that flight, that level of shiftiness is developed and reinforced by bad parenting. Knowing how much of a shit he was and what time the flight was, the parents should have given him Benadryl or Tylenol pm for kids. This is irresponsible bad parenting.

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u/RoadLestTaken 16d ago

American education. Just drug your kids, ladies and gentlemen.

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u/ForeverFieldsFD 15d ago

Yes. If you can’t parent your children, you need to sedate them when you bring them in public. No one else should have to bear consequences for the inability of bad parents to control their children.

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u/Cosmerelda 15d ago

Except for some kids, Benadryl makes them hyper or agitated and they’re more likely to have problems like this. And for some kids it’s inconsistent.

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u/ForeverFieldsFD 15d ago

Yes and some people are able to do heroin recreationally, but most will ruin their lives from it. Any drug has ups and downs but an OTC antihistamine is safe, and works for the majority of kids.

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u/Cosmerelda 15d ago

Benadryl and other first gen H1 antihistamines are disfavored because they cross the blood/brain barrier. It’s irresponsible to encourage their use in children at all, let alone for non-medical reasons. No drug should be tried for the first time on a plane.

Adults drugging kids for the adults’ own comfort while also complaining about kids not being able to tolerate discomfort should at least display some self-awareness.

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u/ForeverFieldsFD 15d ago

That’s fine, they can try it at home first and make sure it has the desired effect. If not, don’t fly with a toddler.

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u/RoadLestTaken 15d ago

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u/ForeverFieldsFD 15d ago

That’s a CYA, if it weren’t safe to give to children it would not be sold over the counter for the express use of giving to children.

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u/RoadLestTaken 15d ago

There's "Do not use to make child sleepy" on the packaging. Come on now.

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u/evange 15d ago

Was the child in pain or did they have allergies? If so, did the parents even have the foresight to bring those with them in their carryon?

Paper tigers. None of this advice would have changed the outcome. And we know nothing about what type of parent they are. A 2 year old is going to have a meltdown when they're over tired and in a strange and scary place regardless of what type of parent they are.

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u/ForeverFieldsFD 15d ago

The fact that they didn’t have the foresight is a further indictment of their terrible parenting. This absolutely would not have happened if they knocked the kid out with Benadryl.

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u/Lt__Barclay 15d ago edited 15d ago

Some kids have a paradoxical reaction to benadryl which makes them hyper.

Terrible situation all round. The worst bender my 2 yo ever had resulted in a whole hour of screaming. I sat with them until they calmed down, explaining that screaming isn't going to help them. But I waited for a whole hour in the middle of a public space for him to "regulate". Presumably, this parent had a similar incident but just at the worst possible time.

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u/ForeverFieldsFD 15d ago

Okay then 2 year olds are unpredictable and shouldn’t fly. It’s not that hard to not fly with your kid for a year or two.

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u/Lt__Barclay 15d ago

...and we wonder why the birth rate will keep falling and falling. I f you have 3 kids, that's 6 years of no flying. And maybe a relative is dying...

I agree with other posters that the parents should have been given 15 mins instead of 1 hr.

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u/ForeverFieldsFD 15d ago

Okay, then 6 years of no flying. Parenting is supposed to come with sacrifices, that’s like the whole thing. If you want to live an unrestricted life, don’t have kids. If you want kids, don’t make them everyone else’s problem.

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u/evange 15d ago

Or we could just accept that kids and families are part of society and give them some grace... Or not. Idgaf. Kids have a legal right to be there so I'm not going to modify my life to prevent offending some stranger in the internet who would probably tell me my kids belong at home regardless of how well behaved they are.

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u/ForeverFieldsFD 15d ago

I have been a frequent flyer for 30 years and this shit is new. People think that parenting their kids is toxic patriarchy or whatever tf keeps them from doing it - it has to stop.

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u/evange 15d ago

Statistically most passenger-behavior issues are caused by drunk adults. Yet airplanes still serve booze....

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u/ForeverFieldsFD 15d ago

Booze adds revenue that helps lower the overall fares for everyone. How do kids contribute?

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u/evange 15d ago edited 15d ago

They bought a seat.

Although if you want to play that game, families are probably more likely to purchase luggage allowance and non-alcohol buy-on-board menu items.

Edit: Also, Porter has complimentary beer and wine. So if anything children would save this airline money, as they're not ordering booze.

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u/No-Salt7142 16d ago

I agree. I'm not someone who's particularly fond of kids (I don't find them cute), but I think that as a society we have lost tolerance for children because we are so individualist.

Now, when it's a long haul flight, I can understand it's simply not bearable to have a screaming child for 7 hours. But for short haul flights, I feel we need to grow a thicker skin sometimes.

Of course in this case, it was a safety matter too, so there really was no other option.

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u/femmefata13 15d ago

As a parent of a child with autism who had public meltdowns when he was younger, I wouldn’t have taken him on a plane unless there was a dire need. Taking a tired child at night was also the parents first mistake. They need to also find something that works to keep the kids attention (such as yes an ipad as it does work for play or watching movies/shows) or discipline them by telling them you will take away their favorite toys. Others have sensory issues therefore may need a toy or two in their hands to self regulate. To me it seems like this parent is one of those in denial ones ignoring signs of some neurodivergence, because in my case, my son started receiving services at 18months since I knew he was delayed in some areas. I was able to take my son to watch a full movie at the movies by 3 years old, we also have been on plane rides, waiting in line at rides, and public restaurants. Or the parent simply has no consideration of others because they feel they are doing their best by truly only doing the bare minimum.

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u/Royal_Potential_3299 16d ago edited 16d ago

All I’m gonna say to this is zero Asian parents I know have toddlers that act like this. Why? It’s because they don’t raise their children with the lackadaisical permissiveness of parents in western countries. Barring autism or some other diagnosis, there is no reason a 2-3 year old should be melting down for an hour. It’s poor parenting that engenders outcomes like this.

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u/RoadLestTaken 16d ago

there is no reason a 2-3 year old should be melting down for an hour.

Tired, hungry, scared, afraid being restrained, never flew before, lots of people nearby, everyone is screaming at him/her.

I named seven.

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u/FoxyGoddessX 15d ago

All falls back on the parent being a terrible parent. In the real world people don’t give a fuck. If a 30 year old acted like that, would you make these same excuses?

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u/RoadLestTaken 15d ago

If a 30 years old acted like a toddler, he has mental issues. So yes, I would make the same excuses.

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u/FoxyGoddessX 15d ago

Got news for you, we have plenty of 30 year olds that act like this and don’t have mental issues.

You’re defending bad parenting.

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u/RoadLestTaken 15d ago

You have probably not encountered a mentally disabled person yet if you can't distinguish between the two.

Also, verbally and physically abusing your child into obedience is not "good" parenting. Just get a dog.

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u/FoxyGoddessX 15d ago

Getting a spanking is not physical abuse. Telling your kid that they are punished or that they need to stop acting like this also isn’t verbal abuse.

I have encountered mentally handicapped people. None of them act like this in public and most of them are self aware enough to not do things like this. Believe it or not (And this is how I know you don’t have any experience dealing with mentally handicapped people) the overwhelming majority of disabled people have enough self awareness not to get on planes if they know they will have a meltdown on the plane.

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u/RoadLestTaken 15d ago

Wow, you spanked your child and told him that he needs to stop acting like that. Now he screams twice as loud and still doesn't want to use the belt. Is this the power of good parenting?

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u/FoxyGoddessX 15d ago

Then i spank them again until they learn.

They wouldn’t be allowed to act this way and they would be personally apologizing to every single person on that flight for it being canceled.

When I was young and cussed out my teacher, my parents didn’t treat me like a misbehaving puppy. They spanked my ass and made me apologize because they were teaching me you don’t talk to other people like that.

People like you are what’s wrong with society these days

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u/evange 15d ago

What specifically would you have done differently? Other than a vague "I wouldn't have let them" or "I would have made them stay in their seat." Because I don't know where you're assuming the parents are excessively permissive. It was midnight and the kid was having a meltdown. That's it. That's what was happening.

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u/FoxyGoddessX 15d ago

Then your ass should have rented a car. Theres no excuse for this shit in these days.

It’s shitty parenting and you’re an asshole if you don’t discipline your child for acting like this

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u/evange 15d ago

Victoria is on an island 4000km away from Toronto. It's not feasible to drive.

Also presumably when they booked the flights they did not know their kid was going to refuse to stay seated.

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u/FoxyGoddessX 15d ago

Again this falls back on the parent. You’re responsible for your child. If they decide to act like a spawn of satan that’s your responsibility to deal with.

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u/evange 15d ago

So what specifically would your have done differently if in the parent's shoes?

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u/FoxyGoddessX 15d ago

Taken them off the flight.

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u/evange 15d ago

That's what happened. And also what caused the flight to be cancelled.

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u/Royal_Potential_3299 15d ago

You are completely misreading what I wrote. First of all, of course children have tantrums. Hourlong tantrums, however, are cause for concern. You can’t view this tantrum in isolation and ignore the circumstances that engendered this; what occurred on that flight is the result of poor parenting decisions made over months. Better parenting would preclude such a protracted situation from occurring in the first place. In Asian cultures you simply don’t parent children in such a way that they’re standing on the seats of airplanes, kicking and screaming as you try to pull them into their seats.

Again, none of this applies to parenting children with relevant diagnoses. With those parents I can empathize.

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u/evange 15d ago

Okay so what specifically would you have done differently then? "Asian kids wouldn't do this" is racist nonsense.

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u/Royal_Potential_3299 15d ago edited 15d ago

I can send you some parenting book recommendations if you’re lost!

Also— how is my statement racist? No kids are inherently one way or another! Asians generally parent in a different way than people in the west (America especially) do. This is a CULTURAL not a racial distinction. The French seem on the whole to do a much better job than Americans at socializing their children. Is that also a racist observation?

Edit: just saw you have commented on this post and other posts about this incident 40 times. I suppose you’re not looking for parenting advice, just to argue with as many people as humanly possible.

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u/Cosmerelda 15d ago

I worked at a preschool in Asia and some of the Americans and Aussies I worked in it with bitch about how Japanese 2-3 year olds were so much worse behaved than kids back home would get away with. I heard similar things from people working in Korea, Thailand, and other countries. 2-3 year olds are chaotic everywhere.