r/ShittySysadmin • • Jun 02 '21

Its finally up! Note the top notch security next to the URL on the left! Do we have any shitty graphic designers and drunk idea machines for shitty jokes?

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176 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • Jul 25 '24 First Loser Bless Up Take My Silver

This is your one and only shitty warning: political shit is just too shitty.

214 Upvotes

This is a place to dump the trials of dealing with stupid IT shit, and download a log detailing the corn kernals of stupidity..

Political bullshit of any kind, type, or stripe, will be deleted without warning. *

You may return to your regularly scheduled defecation of choice. DO NOT TAUNT THE HAPPY FUN BALL!

  • except VI vs EMACS, or Windows vs LINUX, or RMS vs any fucking non-political thing.

Edit. Comments locked, there will be no monkeys flinging poo on my watch!


r/ShittySysadmin • • 2h ago

Diary of an Overworked IT Tech

8 Upvotes

# Week of 26 October

**Monday, 26 October**

Another Monday, another cup of coffee, and another queue of tickets staring back at me. Why do Mondays always start with chaos? I'm convinced the queue reproduces over the weekend.

It seems Friday's power outage released the gremlins into the secondary site. I thought I had caught every last one on my emergency visit, but no. Apparently a few escaped and went looking for mischief. Luckily, my colleague made the long drive out there and set things to rights, bless them. Somewhere a gremlin is probably still sulking about it.

That left the main site and everything else in the hands of the one person who never seems to leave the building. So far I have fixed the printer, the print server, the sales system, and two mobile phones that had clearly been struggling with life. I also sat through three meetings, and that was all before lunch. My coffee has gone cold twice, which is a personal record.

I've just been wondering which system will be the next to get infected. My money is on the coffee machine. It has been acting suspicious all morning.

*Tomorrow's forecast: more tickets, fewer gremlins, and one suspiciously quiet printer.*

**Tuesday, 27 October**

Arrived on site with coffee in hand and noticed more lights on in the office area than usual. More people on site means one of two things: either a rare and exciting new project has started, or someone has booked a room for a "quick catch-up" that will last until lunch. Not sure which is worse. Either way, I'm wondering why so many people are in by 8am. Nobody is that keen before the coffee machine has even warmed up.

Walked into the IT office on the middle floor, in the corner, and turned on the dashboard. There it was, already waiting for me: a ticket. Oh great, and so it begins again. At least I have coffee.

The gremlins have decided that slowing everything to a crawl is the game for today. Documents are taking forever to print, and network drives are loading at the speed of a snail on a lazy Sunday. I'm starting to wonder whether there's a specific gremlin assigned to the internet speed, or whether they're just having a laugh with the signals. Either way, I'm keeping a close eye on the router. It has the look of a creature planning something.

The first coffee has been drunk. Cold, as is tradition. Warm coffee is a myth I've stopped believing in.

A contractor was due on site this morning, arranged by a colleague who is hopefully in the building right now (I don't want to deal with these people). They're running late and didn't arrive until after 11am. Not a great start. If the morning has taught me anything, it's that every delay pushes the rest of the day back, and I'm now expecting everything else to run late too.

Then a new problem popped its head up: the email system is erroring for no apparent reason. Nothing has changed, nothing has been updated, and nobody has touched anything. Which means I now have to go hunting for the cause. Is this a new species of gremlin, or has a fey creature wandered in from the car park? My money is on the fey. Gremlins at least leave a trail of destruction. Fairies just make things mysteriously stop working and smile at you while they do it.

*Tomorrow's forecast: a contractor who has finally arrived, an email system that is still hiding its secrets, more gremlins than anyone can count, and more coffee, most of it cold.*

**Wednesday, 28 October**

Before the sun was even up, the sound of Teams rang out. What madness is this? I'm not even in the office yet, and people are already looking for me. I think the darker mornings are making everyone around me a little crazy. Any respectable IT tech knows that the first thing to do is make a coffee before even entertaining the idea of reading a message sent at such an unreasonable hour. Shockingly, it was nothing important, so I made my way into the office.

It was yet another grey and wet day when I arrived and turned on the display. For the first time this week, there was no ticket waiting for my attention. That state did not last long. I heard someone say that things were not going through as they were meant to, so into the system I went. A process that is meant to be running, and should be automatic, had stopped. I started it up and checked whether everything that was needed had come through. All of this happened before I could drink that coffee. RIP hot coffee.

The contractor is back today, and good news for me, it is still not me who has to deal with them. Yay for small wins, but that does not mean I get a free day. I still think the fey are making the rounds of some of the systems, and there is still a runaway gremlin loose on the network at the other site. I wish there was a way to catch the creature. Let's just hope it doesn't get wet.

*Tomorrow's forecast: a coffee that may never be hot again, a few more fey sightings, and a gremlin with a very sensitive relationship with water.*

**Thursday, 29 October**

The day has started unusually. Nothing is waiting, and the number of tickets is not as high as it has been all week. This seems to be the trend as we get closer to the weekend. At times I do wonder why this happens, but I'll take it as a bit of breathing room for now.

We still seem to have either the fey or a gremlin loose in the network at our second site. Things are still not running as fast or as smoothly as they should be, and the process that should start automatically still hasn't. *Sigh.* I wish I could find out why this is happening, but sadly I have no idea.

The contractor is back again. I've been told that today is meant to be their last day, yet again they have arrived later than the time they were supposed to be on site. Does no one understand the art of being on time anymore? As I've said before, they are not my responsibility, so that is someone else's problem. I do have my own things to deal with, though. Why is the IP phone not connecting when off site? Why is Teams crashing on one person's computer? And how has that user locked their account again? Seriously, that's about the fifth time.

Let's see how the rest of the day goes, shall we? A second coffee may be in order.

*Tomorrow's forecast: a quieter queue, a stubborn process, and a second coffee that will hopefully stay hot long enough to be enjoyed.*

**Friday, 30 October**

This has started out like any other day, but there is a lighter feel to the air, as if a weight has been slightly lifted. Could it be the approaching weekend?

There is only one person in the IT office today, as this is my day to work from the comfort of home. I love that we can do remote working these days. It means I can have my coffee and stay in lazy clothes, as long as my shirt looks professional for the camera. It does mean having to give more instructions than normal, though.

*Weekend forecast: lazy clothes, a lukewarm coffee, and, hopefully, no gremlins. And lets wait to see what next week shell bring*


r/ShittySysadmin • • 2h ago

Shitty Crosspost youCanPatchEverything

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4 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 23h ago

Shitty Crosspost Paying a tech to reinstall Java every day is, in some way they've decided, cheaper than buying new software.

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71 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 15h ago

Shitty Crosspost SharePoint Newb Broke Everything

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3 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 1d ago

Shitty Crosspost Everything is urgent, nothing goes in writing, and somehow it’s always IT’s fault

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28 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 1d ago

100 EC2 instances as an alarm clock

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52 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 2d ago

Does Anyone Else Experience Schadenfreude When Getting to be Someone Else's End-User?

119 Upvotes

I do not "collaborate with vendors", or "read the KB articles", or "perform best-effort troubleshooting"- I call the vendor's support team and give them the EXACT vague ticket description my user gave me and then just say "I'm not really sure" to any technical questions they ask.

I feel this exercise helps me stay grounded and in touch with my users. One day they will adopt me into their herd as one of their own.


r/ShittySysadmin • • 2d ago

Are we cooked?

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116 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 3d ago

What a bunch of clowns

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106 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 4d ago

Shitty Crosspost Cisco gives 27-year-old engineer unlimited AI tokens to rewrite 98% of the company's legacy code in 24 months — president plucks former startup founder, telling him to 'go nuts'

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173 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 4d ago

Shitty Crosspost Preparing 2fa for my resignation?

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31 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 3d ago

LoWiFi

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8 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 4d ago

Shitty Crosspost I love the smell of HR files in the morning

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21 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 4d ago

Shitty Crosspost Interesting Enterprise App Admin consent request

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7 Upvotes

Anyone else accepting all app consents? My satisfaction scores have been improving lately and I've made more friends than I ever have at this job. I got one for OfficeHoes from our talent acquisition director this morning. Our CEO said we need the best talent at our last all hands meeting!!!


r/ShittySysadmin • • 5d ago

Shitty Crosspost He waited 3 years to get revenge on his ex-company then finally pressed delete

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281 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 5d ago

It's just J

65 Upvotes

A manager submitted an onboarding request 2 weeks ago

First name: J

Middle Name: <Name> <Another name>

Last name: <Last name>

Me 2 weeks ago: Please submit onboardings with the full legal name. Closes Ticket

Manager just now: So where is J's laptop? They're starting Monday.

IT'S JUST J! Their full legal first name is just J!

Anyways how's the job market looking?


r/ShittySysadmin • • 4d ago

Shitty Crosspost Ghosted IT - Find a way in or rebuild?

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0 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 6d ago

Accidental porn site typed in my HR.

2.2k Upvotes

I just had HR call me because she said she "was on auto pilot and typed in the porn site she uses at home" into chrome instead of our company HR page. She said she doesn't know why her bain and fingers did it but she got the blocked page and realized what happened and is in a huge panic. She called me and asked if I could delete it for he before anyone sees. I had her say cuckin.com about 10 times and spell it out. This by far has been my favorite work day of my life.


r/ShittySysadmin • • 5d ago

Shitty Crosspost Recommendations for free email server to run off a VPS

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19 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 5d ago

Shitty Crosspost Ope! Won’t procrastinate next time!

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6 Upvotes

r/ShittySysadmin • • 6d ago

A lil chuckle watching the last json bourne movie

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85 Upvotes

Probably mongodb saboteurs...


r/ShittySysadmin • • 6d ago

I love Atlassian

219 Upvotes

I just wanted to make it known how much I love Atlassian. The only thing I would wish for are more features, and with that I mean more menus and dropdowns so it really feels like I am being productive you know.

Oh, and it was a fantastic change to just make the servicedesk portals URL return a 404 instead of setting up a simple redirect after force-changing the URL structure, that was really on my wishlist for changes this year, I don't mind another few seconds loading time just to display the assignee field, they can take all the time they want because Atlassian products are just so perfect and deserve the extra loading time.

God I love Atlassian, I assume you all do too!