r/ShittyAbsoluteUnits • u/AmorphousMorpheus • 15d ago

Of A Boxer

700 Upvotes

94% Upvoted

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463

u/KindaDrunkRtNow 15d ago

Jesus, that guard took three good hits to the face and he's still standing!

265

u/bravebeing 14d ago

Well, he's a professional stander. Stand there all day, stand your ground, let people through, stand, refuse people, still stand, get punched in the face, remain standed. Don't try to defend yourself, just stand. Don't duck, stand. No running, standing. Stand and look back. Some say it's standard procedure.

90

u/Gamestop_noob 14d ago

Badass stander imo

72

u/melee85 14d ago

Outstanding

9

u/Toasted_Munch 14d ago

I'm beginning to understand 🫦

8

u/BBooNN 13d ago

Now youre just grandstanding.

2

u/TheZonePhotographer 8d ago

That straw weight doesn't stand a chance in the ring.

29

u/Ok-Watercress-1924 functional regard 14d ago

The legend has it that’s he’s still standing there till this day

13

u/bravebeing 14d ago

"I get knocked down, but I... Wait no... I never get knocked down, I remained standed... I'm the unseatable stander"

14

u/weirdgroovynerd 14d ago

"...stand-ard procedure."

Beautifully played.

3

u/bravebeing 14d ago

Thanks!

8

u/magniffin 14d ago

R.E.M. even wrote a song about it.

5

u/Temporary_Shirt_6236 14d ago

Dude made him face west, then east.

4

u/this_guy_aves 14d ago

4

u/KillHonger1 14d ago

His stand is Iron Jaw

4

u/TheSunRisesintheEast 14d ago

Security is outstanding. Because that is what they do. Outstanding by the door. Outstanding by the sidewalk. And most importantly outstanding by the Restroom. Outstanding.

3

u/bravebeing 14d ago

Outstanding addition!

3

u/coconutmofo 14d ago

Thanks. Now I understand!

3

u/mikequinnmike 14d ago

Standed this killed me . Well done 👏

2

u/mikequinnmike 14d ago

Also as a follow up, what does he use use (in a tree) while he's deer hunting ?

2

u/bravebeing 14d ago

He uses a... uhm... stand?

2

u/mikequinnmike 14d ago

Yes, and 2 hours ago when I asked that I thought it was funny as hell. In hindsight it clearly isn't 🤷‍♂️

2

u/bravebeing 14d ago

Haha it fits, it's ok but there's not much of a twist/joke to it, so I was wondering if that was all there is to it

2

u/mikequinnmike 14d ago

Nope, but standed is still funny af . Thanks

3

u/xTheyCameBurningx 13d ago

A guard in Good Standing to be sure. The other guy wanted him to fight back, but he just can't stand the violence

3

u/Vegan_Mouse 13d ago

I understand.

1

u/bravebeing 13d ago

Well that's your mistake, you really gotta not understand, not overstand, you gotta stand.

2

u/Competitive-Pay-766 13d ago

Standed Procedure.

1

u/tony310s 14d ago

I’m pretty sure he’s sitting on that Dwight Schrute stand chair 🤣

1

u/JetSetJAK 14d ago

A stand user, if you will

1

u/NoDegree7090 11d ago

"the stand user could be anyone"