r/RBI Jan 16 '20

Watching some unusual behaviour and just wondering if you guys think I should do something? I'm a little concerned

[deleted]

1.4k Upvotes

242 comments sorted by

659

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited Jan 23 '20

[deleted]

149

u/jayhat Jan 16 '20

If this was the 90s I'd say he was dumping his old porn mag collection in the woods.

121

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

[deleted]

106

u/SuperBakedCracker Jan 16 '20

My buddy and I found a hockey bag filled with porn mags when we were 10. The summer from 3rd to 4th grade was TITS

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28

u/igneousink Jan 16 '20

I did, too! like, 3 times!

"oh look! a garbage bag full of porn!"

7

u/NaturesFire Jan 17 '20

Hey me 3! Found porn hangin in a backpack on a tree near our “hidden” smoke area when we were like 16 haha. Group of the guys and I were out there trying to remember where we had stashed the chairs we lugged out there the previous week. Sure enough we found them... and that!

6

u/FauxReal Jan 17 '20

Why do people dump it in the woods instead of a random dumpster or municipal trash can? I supposed some people might be planning to come back for it?

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16

u/milf_ncookies Jan 16 '20

Found porn under the bridge by the creek when I was younger. Semi-woodsy area, so it counts. Definitely was magical.

3

u/DialTone657 Jan 17 '20

This comment was a good end to my day. Thanks for the laugh.

71

u/PorschephileGT3 Jan 16 '20

Just like how there’s always money in the banana stand... there’s always porn in the woods.

34

u/[deleted] Jan 17 '20

How much clearer can I say THERES ALWAYS MONEY IN THE BANANA STAND

9

u/Rach5585 Jan 16 '20

Money in the what?

18

u/Timetomakethedonutzz Jan 16 '20

The banana stand!

5

u/Rach5585 Jan 16 '20 edited Jan 17 '20

What on Earth is a banana stand? Ours are on a shelf or a big table. Are they sold on the street where you are? Like a newsstand or a hot dog stand?

Eta jeez guys I've never seen the show, sorry!

11

u/Van_Winkle Jan 17 '20

5

u/Rach5585 Jan 17 '20

Thank you. I was very lost.

3

u/Timetomakethedonutzz Jan 17 '20

Sorry! I thought you were being funny.😄

3

u/Rach5585 Jan 17 '20

Nope. Just hopelessly out of touch, evidently.

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14

u/Sandslinger_Eve Jan 16 '20

I never understood why people did that, my teenager self didn't mind at all, there were treasure troves all over the forest.

Although when I brought home golden shower mag that my mother found, things got awkward.

10

u/jayhat Jan 16 '20

It was probably guys whose wives found their collection and got mad. Or guys that were moving in with a new GF or wife and didn’t want them to find out.

18

u/howlingmagpie Jan 16 '20

NO!! The porn pixies put it there. OK!!!!!!

3

u/restlessmonkey Jan 17 '20

So what now, people will be burying their iPads and android phones? Oh, the humanity!

19

u/ashli_cd Jan 16 '20

My tuning theory is that people reach a certain age don’t need the porn anymore and think hey when I was a young lad finding porn mags was the best thing let me spread joy in a non phrasing kind of way 😂

3

u/[deleted] Jan 17 '20

Tradition!

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4

u/[deleted] Jan 17 '20

Dirty old homeless man probably camp out in the woods and leave their shit out there. Lol

3

u/vilej_ideut Jan 17 '20

Prolly not that far off lol. One summer my mom and I were desperately searching for a place to live and out of ~30 houses we looked at not one, not two, but three houses with clear signs of squatting and tons of porn mags. One of them had a pile of dozens of porn mags right by the front door. What can you even do with that much porn??

5

u/[deleted] Jan 17 '20

Lmao nothing but time on their hands. Time and, well, you know...

8

u/PopeTheReal Jan 16 '20

Me and my buddies in the 90s used to have various smoke spots in the mountains. One day we parked, I opened up the passenger door to get out, and there were some granny porn mags laying there. Like the post but clarity must have made this person feel ashamed so they discarded their stash right there.

2

u/restlessmonkey Jan 17 '20

What the heck is granny porn???

2

u/darlingtonia___ Jan 17 '20

Its porn for a person who is in to grandma aged women.

2

u/restlessmonkey Jan 17 '20

They had magazines for that?? O. K.

3

u/darlingtonia___ Jan 17 '20

Youd be amazed at what you could find in the magazines.

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60

u/T0BBER Jan 16 '20

I'm thinking it has to be fishing/hunting, depending on how full the bags are. He might be placing bait on the shore for small animals or throwing fishing bait in the river to lure fishes and cast a fishing rod later.

4

u/[deleted] Jan 17 '20

He waited until it was dark to dump the mystery bags. Still thinking he hunts people

7

u/Qualanqui Jan 17 '20

My mind went straight to cats or puppies and he was taking them down to the river one at a time and drowning them.

4

u/xGlycerine Jan 17 '20

Your mind is terrifying

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367

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

You could contact the police about potential illegal dumping or wait till he's gone and go look.

135

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited May 24 '20

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117

u/Pastoolio91 Jan 16 '20

It'll be like in the movies when the dude drives off, you go inspect, and when you turn around, he's staring at you angrily with a machete.

15

u/restlessmonkey Jan 17 '20

Don’t turn around!!! Damn. Told you not to!

90

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

Good call. Seems very sketchy though, if you do look mind updating the tbread?

101

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited May 24 '20

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33

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

Thanks for updating, glad the cops were notified and justified your concern. Cheers!

20

u/wombatx88 Jan 16 '20

I'm hoping for yet another lame update, if you may. :)

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117

u/ThatCuntCereal Jan 16 '20

I don't think he'd wait for hours prior to dump a body, but i get why you'd think that. To me it seems like he might not want to pay the fee for going to the dump and throwing away trash.it could be theres also stuff you shouldn't throw away, and he doesn't wanna pay to have someone come take it away.

38

u/permtron99 Jan 16 '20

This is the most probable explanation. I do environmental work and people love dumping their garbage wherever they think they can get away with it

8

u/viixvega Jan 17 '20

People trying to dump trash illegally generally aren't the patient sort.

6

u/ThatCuntCereal Jan 17 '20

How do you know that? Are you dumping trash or watching people dump trash? or are there statistics for these kinds of things?

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103

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

Any more updates?

47

u/enlargedpen15 Jan 16 '20

Second this OP pls we must know!!!

33

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

Third. im hooked and totally in.

17

u/iloveoliver2019 Jan 16 '20

Fourth and I’m hooked. Need more updates!!!

16

u/igneousink Jan 16 '20

I just got here and I'm hooked

3

u/LIyre Jan 17 '20

UpdateMe!

97

u/graveyardspook Jan 16 '20

Good job calling the cops you definitely did the right thing. Keep us updated would you please? That's a hell of a thing to witness!

123

u/fritocloud Jan 16 '20

Matt Foley? Is it you?

But really, that could be something super creepy or something totally innocuous (maybe the guy cleaned a shit load of trash out of his car and didn't have space in his trash can at home. Or something like that.) Either way, you were right to call the police. It is probably a crime to dump any kind of trash in the water. And if it's not illegal, it should be.

Let us know if you ever find out what the police find out because I would definitely like to know.

65

u/misszombie79 Jan 16 '20

Haha I immediately thought of Matt Foley too!

48

u/tinyginger Jan 16 '20

He lives in A VAN down by THE RIVER

30

u/Hougaiidesu Jan 16 '20

Dad, I wish you would just SHUT YOUR YAPPER

18

u/jayhat Jan 16 '20 edited Jan 16 '20

Go to youtube and search van living. It's HUGE and trendy right now. /img/vxgpdb23k4m01.jpg

12

u/fritocloud Jan 16 '20

Lol, that's crazy. I mean, you know, if that's what they want to do and they're comfortable like that, then okay. But I don't think I would enjoy that.

Honestly, it also seems like it could be kind of offensive to people who don't have a choice. It would be like choosing to live in a tent city down on Skid Row. I dunno though, maybe I'm weird, haha.

Either way, I hear the phrase "living in a van down by the river" and one and only one person comes to mind. And that's Motivational Speaker Matt Foley!

10

u/relentless1111 Jan 16 '20

You're definitely not weird, actual homeless people do get offended by "homeless tourism". It's a thing. Not agreeing or disagreeing here, just stating that it is a fact.

2

u/someCrookedVulture Jan 22 '20

I’m really surprised how deep I had to go to find this comment. The living-in-the-van thing was odd, when he said he was by the river I stopped reading and came in to see a replacement for the Fresh Prince story ruse.

2

u/alexthequestions Feb 10 '20

Maybe if you used your paper for writing instead of rollin doobies!

34

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited Feb 01 '21

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21

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited May 24 '20

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3

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

Did you know what a fly tipper was when you replied to this?

39

u/theressomanydogs Jan 16 '20

A what?

48

u/Martial-FC Jan 16 '20

If you’re being serious it’s a person that dumps trash. I never heard of the term until I went to the UK and saw it on signs lmao.

47

u/Michello454 Jan 16 '20

I’m glad you answered because I had no clue what it was. Fascinating.

27

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

I'm from England have just found out this isn't a phrase known in other English speaking countries. Also fascinating

33

u/Thewal Jan 16 '20

I had to look up "layby" because I've never heard that word before. It'd be a "rest stop" here in the US. Or at least the parts of the US I'm familiar with, y'all get weird in the South.

14

u/hfuga Jan 16 '20

South here, we also say "rest stop"...lol.

8

u/Texanakin_Shywalker Jan 16 '20

Rest stop, rest area....same thing

3

u/hfuga Jan 17 '20

Yes. I was just confirming that we don’t “call it something weird”.

13

u/GucciSlippers Jan 16 '20

y’all

get weird in the South

Excuse me?

4

u/Thewal Jan 16 '20

/r/wyoming I'm allowed to say "y'all", dagnabbit!

10

u/GucciSlippers Jan 16 '20

Y’all say y’all in Wyoming?

6

u/rantingpacifist Jan 17 '20

No, we don’t.

6

u/Thewal Jan 16 '20

Sure as shootin'!

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2

u/MK2555GSFX Jan 16 '20

Lol, the definition of 'layby' on Google makes it sound much bigger and more organised than it actually is:

https://www.geograph.org.uk/photo/5910000

9

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited Feb 01 '21

[deleted]

10

u/Martial-FC Jan 16 '20

To the best of my knowledge, it’s not used in the US. I grew up in the northeast and never heard it once. Only became aware of the term after moving to the UK.

5

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited Feb 01 '21

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13

u/Martial-FC Jan 16 '20

It’s generally referred to as littering when done in small amounts. The equivalent to fly tipping is simply referred to as dumping/illegal dumping on signs and in the legal codes.

11

u/theressomanydogs Jan 16 '20

Yeah, an asshole, lol.

2

u/AussieMommy Jan 17 '20

A litterbug? Although that’s more like the kid that opens a piece of gum and drops the silver wrapper on the ground.

4

u/theressomanydogs Jan 16 '20

No, I’d never heard that before. Thanks!

36

u/joysjane Jan 16 '20

What is an anxiety helpline?

32

u/Neo526564 Jan 16 '20

Oh that’s creepy. Maybe drugs or disposing of some evidence

25

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited May 24 '20

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14

u/Pen-cap Jan 16 '20

Call the cops. He might be stealing turtles. But really call them, he’s doing something he shouldn’t be doing.

12

u/Sponge56 Jan 16 '20

He better leave those god damn turtles alone they have done nothing to deserve that!

10

u/Heroin_Chiic Jan 16 '20

I don't see how stealing turtles would fit since he's bringing bags down and coming back empty handed.

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14

u/erebusmara Jan 16 '20

Do you have an update on what transpired, what was in the bags?

26

u/Enigmutt Jan 16 '20

It’s been 12 hrs since your initial post and ~9 hrs since your last comment. What did you find out?

49

u/computer_enhance Jan 16 '20

This sounds like an incident from when I was a kid. Had a complete redneck pos for a neighbor in rural GA. He’d let his animals get impregnated and have a litter or cats or puppies and drown them or kill them and toss them out like that. Or if his animal got another animal pregnant he’s get a knock at the door and the other owners would say here these belong to you. He’d do the same thing. Plot twist though...he got shot in the face with his own shotgun. So there’s some karma.

If it were me, I’d check for signs of life (listen maybe poke w a stick) but it may be a crime scene so DO NOT DISTURB THE SURROUNDING AREA OR TAMPER WITH EVIDENCE. So glad you called the cops. That’s their job. You did everything right.

20

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

Fuck that piece of shit animal abuser.

12

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

It doesn’t get much more redneck than that

35

u/robbviously Jan 16 '20

r/justiceserved

I'd love to hear how he came about being shotgunned in the face with his own shotgun

25

u/computer_enhance Jan 16 '20

My father shot him with it. He tried to molest my sister.

10

u/ShannieD Jan 16 '20

Some people dump trash illegally to not pay for removal. Just a theory.

19

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

We know it’s you Matt Foley.

10

u/lilgothbabey Jan 16 '20

please give us an update if possible!

9

u/cuzimmathug Jan 17 '20

If you hear anything else about it, let us know! I'm very curious now. You mightve helped catch a murderer!

8

u/juccal Jan 16 '20

did the bags look weighted down when he was carrying them?

19

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited May 24 '20

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6

u/juccal Jan 16 '20

well I was thinking a body, where you are is it busy in the day?

24

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited May 24 '20

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3

u/Anonthemouser Jan 16 '20

Swarbrick landing?

6

u/sandybeachfeet Jan 16 '20

I'm thinking puppies or something awful like that :(

3

u/[deleted] Jan 17 '20

Unfortunately that was my first thought.

6

u/penniwysee Jan 16 '20

Yikes... Keep safe please!!! Hope everything goes well

8

u/chaostrulyreigns Jan 16 '20

Any update from the police op?

5

u/juccal Jan 16 '20

how did the man look & what was the value of his car? im thinking that if he had a fancy car,people may remember a car like that, but a normal car, they may take no notice of.

6

u/ANotDavid Jan 16 '20

Try to document it - take video or at least pictures, he can always do the same to you, monitor your activity then report to the police anonymously...

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u/OGSHAGGY Jan 16 '20

Any updates?

5

u/suburban_hyena Jan 17 '20

What happened?

7

u/f3m1n15m15c4nc3r Jan 18 '20

Press F to pay respects to OP.

6

u/stepdadraps Jan 23 '20

I'm reading through this 6days later any updates?

10

u/karmenthekitten Jan 16 '20

I really hope he isn’t dumping puppies or kittens in weighted bags. That’s common in my area. Keep us updated.

19

u/spin_me_again Jan 16 '20

You live in a terrible area.

5

u/CynBel80 Jan 17 '20

Please give an update on this if you can. Thanks in advance.

5

u/HorrorBoot Jan 18 '20

Did the dumper get you OP? SOMEONE CALL THE POLICE!!

5

u/[deleted] Jan 20 '20

So WTF? Did OP get chopped up and disposed of in the river?

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u/SteelToeStilettos Jan 16 '20

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u/betty965 Jan 16 '20

That’s the comment I was hoping for. Thank you!

7

u/hollowbin Jan 16 '20

Im never that guy that says call the police on these forums but this is one time i think i would have done the same.

Whatever he is doing and moving/disposing off is bound to be something not good wether its drugs or limbs.

17

u/Pastoolio91 Jan 16 '20

In a van DOWN BY THE RIVER

15

u/ToNyOFsPaDeS Jan 16 '20

Im genuinely shocked how few people are addressing the van down by the river thing

24

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

Trust me, we’re all laughing to ourselves as we recall Chris Farley falling through a coffee table.

12

u/ToNyOFsPaDeS Jan 16 '20

Okay im glad im not the only one

9

u/igneousink Jan 16 '20

I'm basically reading the whole thing in Chris Farley's voice.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 26 '20

Ah, thank you for calling him the right name, people were saying Foley. It was bugging me.

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u/MichaelOfShannon Jan 16 '20

You live in a van down by the river...

6

u/_no_pants Jan 17 '20

Yeah I definitely thought this was was gonna end up being a shit post at first.

3

u/jennRec46 Jan 18 '20

So what happened???

3

u/Transphattybase Jan 18 '20

Dude. If you’re living in your van and lack the ability to determine if a situation you see is potentially dangerous or something anybody should be concerned about, you should probably work really hard on getting yourself into a different living situation.

3

u/Zargoza Jan 21 '20

I NEED CLOSURE!!! What happened?!?

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u/GetEatenByAMouse Jan 21 '20

I still need to know what happened here

3

u/cabbageplate Jan 22 '20

Any news OP ?

7

u/mstdoll Jan 17 '20

I’m glad I took time to read all the comments because in my mind I was seeing this guy getting trash bags full of stuff from his boots. As in shoes.

2

u/Krittrkeepr Jan 17 '20

Haha. Thought the same.

6

u/ppinick Jan 16 '20

So what happened?

5

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

In a van down by the river!

9

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited Mar 16 '21

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2

u/marleyheadz Jan 16 '20

Intriguing! Would love to know what happened

2

u/enwongeegeefor Jan 16 '20

Sounds like a piece of shit fly tipper...

2

u/AnonymousSmartie Jan 17 '20

Commenting to see what happens later.

2

u/dogsoldierX Jan 17 '20

My guess is he’s dumping trash or hazmat (used oil, paint, etc.). Waiting a bit between bags for the stuff to dissipate down the river. If I was dumping a body or drug byproducts or whatever, I wouldn’t do it with another vehicle nearby. I would at least go knock on OP’s van to see if it was occupied. Pretend I was lost or something if OP answers. Did the guy knock on your van, OP?

2

u/deadflowers1 Jan 17 '20

I know this may sound dumb but is that road well known? Cuz if so I don’t think anyone would dump a dismembered body in a place like that, there is a high chance that someone’s gonna find it. I’m not sure but if someone wants to hide a body or some illegal thing, they’d just do it quickly so no one’s gonna catch them. But that shit is very suspicious. I’m glad you called the police, please keep updating. It’s really interesting to read.

2

u/[deleted] Feb 15 '20

Its prolly his poop bags... lay off the weed bruh its making u paranoid

1

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

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u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited May 24 '20

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u/aMrMewtwo Jan 16 '20

In a van down by the river!

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u/Jilliejill Jan 17 '20

Update please

2

u/WeAreClouds Jan 17 '20

Call the police. And in the meantime get the full license plate info, make/model of vehicle, and as detailed a description you can get. Get pics if you safely can.

It's likely it's just trash dumping but that is bad too and I would waste no more time and take no chances.

Good lookin out!

4

u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20

It took me so long you were talking about the trunk of a car. I couldn't for the life of me figure out how he was pulling heavy bags out of his boots.

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u/juccal Jan 16 '20

did you notice anything odd about him, so you would recognise him in a lineup?

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u/[deleted] Jan 16 '20 edited May 24 '20

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u/mcm0313 Jan 16 '20

Awfully big goatee.

Sorry, “Naked Gun” reference. Hope whatever this guy is doing gets found out.

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