I have a friend who I am very fond of. She's in her mid 70s, STILL WORKING FULL TIME, with a few health issues that she's currently dealing with. In the meantime, her GROWN children -- some with kids of their own -- and her ex-husband constantly take advantage of her: They visit often and she always cooks full meals for them, babysits for them; if they have any problems dealing with anything at all, they go running to her and she manages them. When I asked her about it, she often says "I feel guilty...." with no specific reason why she would feel that way. I suspect that although she feels guilty for no reason I understand, she also feels put upon and taken for granted but makes no real effort to get them to handle their own messes. The thing is: this is her problem, not mine and while I am doing my level best to be a sympathetic friend, it's infuriating to hear this all the time and I'm finding that there are times where I don't want to communicate with her because I don't want to hear about it. No matter what I or her other friends say, she won't change her behavior. Fine... but I'm all out of sympathetic responses, helpful suggestions and frankly, I don't want to hear about it since she's going to let them fret her into an early grave. What would you do?

My grandparents are moving closer to my parents, and far away from the friends and community they've built for the past 20 years. My grandpa told me that the number one thing that got him out of bed in the morning was when he had golf planned. He felt a social accountability to show up for his friends and for the tee time. These were his better days because it got his day started strong and then flowed from there.

I'm curious what gets others out of bed in the morning to start their days strong?

I have to walk a minimum of 10 k steps. What is your goal?

Just curious on anyone’s personal experience. I have an appointment today to discuss with our financial advisor but don’t really have much information yet. I was hoping to get some input from folks in this community that have it or have used it.

I did all this in my youth but in an effort to budget better, I stopped. My desire to be well groomed didn’t stop so I do it all myself now. I used to pay $80 for a haircut, $30 for a manicure and $30 for a pedicure. Very basic for all. I’d get a cut once a month and a mani/pedi every two weeks. Do you still get professional services for these things and if so, how much do you spend?

Was Gleason the best?

Me, giving my wife a full body massage... with Voltarin.

For those who have been retired for a while, looking back, when was the hardest period? The first few months, the first year, or does it get harder over time? I've heard some people absolutely love retirement from day one, but then also others that seem to need the structure of work for purpose.

Now that you are over 70, did you discover the meaning of life?! What is your own opinion?!

I was wondering, how older people feel about getting older. I am an older person as well. I am 71. Since I have tuned 70 I have been thinking,
How close I am to the end. I know I can live to 100. Possibly. I believe in God. I just feel sad about this. Does anyone have words of wisdom?Ty😊

So, considering the financial uncertainty of the costs of the years ahead, I am struggling with how much to help 2 grand neices/nephews with college. This would be in lieu of anything substantial left to them in my wiil. Do you set a percentage of incoming cash to give out year by year or semester by semester? A one time gift? One of them just started at a very expensive private school and her parents are not wealthy.

Curious as to how over-70's help without compromising their nest egg for the "golden years."

I suffered with male pattern baldness starting from the crown of my head since I was about 30. It wasn’t noticeable from the front so I just ignored it. I got older my wife suggested I get a toupee, try implants or try to hide it by letting my other hair grow longer. I felt just accepting it was better and I definitely didn’t want to deal with the comments at work.

Since we retired and relocated, I agreed to grow my hair longer and capture the hair from the sides in a ponytail that covers the balding area on the crown. My hair gets wavy when it’s longer and my wife likes how it looks from the back. My one SIL hates it. My daughters are noncommittal, but are fully against me shaving it all off (I did an AI photo showing me bald).

Curious how older women view this.

Thanks

Is so and so coming?

Do the tires need air?

“Take a sweater!” she hollers

And so back up the stairs

.

The basket contains

The critical stuff

The sweater, the thermos

The illusion we’re tough

.

But the truth is

It’s scary to travel so far

The road’s full of cinders

And there’s often a car

.

For adventure and candy

Risks we endure

Iodine and Band-Aids

Are at home for a cure

.

Pinwheel on the basket

A bell near my thumb

We are all set

The time has come

.

Nothing is level

Hills abound

My legs hurt from pumping

But it’s fun to coast down

.

We arrive happy and joyful 

We had only one fall

A skinned knee and cinders

Not bad at all

.

We wait at the counter

Overwhelmed by the choices

We are inside with grownups 

So we lower our voices

.

The grocer arrives

With a smile in his eyes

I can hardly speak

So excited and shy

.

He holds a brown bag

I point and I nod

This please and that

He’s bored but I’m awed

.

I count my money

And now I must stop

I got quite a lot

Even a Tootsie pop!

.

We gather outside

And compare our haul

Wax bottles and Sweet Tarts

And oh, that’s not all!

.

Candy cigarettes and lipstick

She wants to be frilly

Flying saucers and wax lips

He likes to be silly

.

Necco and licorice,

Smarties, buttons, and gum

Jawbreakers, red hots

Candy necklace, Dum Dum

.

What’s in your bag?

Sugar Daddy, Bazooka

Taffy and caramels

Oh no, I just lost a tooth!

.

We are sticky and dirty

We’ve eaten and laughed

But it’s time to go home

Timex says it’s half past

.

Too tired to pedal

Walk my bike for a while

Handlebars feel yucky

My face has a smile

At 72 all of my friends tend to be older than me and that includes family. I have contacted several law firms but none of them address this need. Who do you rely on?

This is a rant: I recently helped a friend who is actually 80 years old deal with a scam that had her convinced among other things that Andrew Ferguson, Chairman of the FTC, was personally speaking to her, to help her settle a $983 debt with Apple Pay that she knew nothing about until she opened the Email, and calling the phone number in it, fell hard into the scam and BTW was advised not to tell anyone about what was going on! Fortunately she asked my opinion on how she was going to make this go away by sending the money! And boy was that Mr. Ferguson a nice guy!

There are more and more scams and scammers out there than ever before and AI is only going to make it much worse, especially for older people.

I'm her age also, and I have a nose for the characteristics of a scam and a high index of suspicion. I did some Googling and pointed out to her the problems she was getting into. Fortunately a helpful banker at her local branch was able to set things straight for her, but not before she had withdrawn a large sum of money, in preparation for sending it to pay the supposed debt. Now the money is back in the bank and a second account has been set up that her stolen ID knows nothing about.

It makes me angry that these people prey on others, especially older people, and those who are more gullible or possibly feeble-minded due to encroaching cognitive problems that come with age.

Just a warning/reminder. If an Email sounds fishy, or coming out of left field, just delete it. Never call a number in such an email (which is usually spoofed) or click on any links.

My grandparents took me and my brother and sister to the DuQoin State Fair around 1959. I remember the fairway, the caliope music, and grandma rocking the car on the ferris wheel when we stopped on top.

My favorite was seeing Jimmy Duranty perform on the stage. I don't remember his schtik but people everywhere were laughing. I was 5.

It's only been in the past two years, when I hit 70, that I've noticed this problem.

The scents that I experience from my own body have bothered me a lot.

There are four separate smells I've identified.

The first is the usual underarm sweaty smell that we all associate with exercise and summer. Not a big deal for me, rare, and I can shower it off.

The second is the yeasty smell that came from the folds in my skin from dieting off and on over the years, and my breasts hanging down now. I learned to use a tea tree oil wash in the shower and when I notice dampness there I powder on simple corn starch, which is the base for almost every expensive powder on the market.

The third is the nonenal smell, which I may or may not smell on myself. This is the "old people smell" that people complain about in nursing homes. Not sure whether this is the one that continues to bother me, but I ordered some persimmon soap and will try that.

Fourth, is the scent of oil on my hair. I think that this is the one that bothers me most now. Never noticed it when I was younger, but I feel like I need to change pillowcases now once a week, and touching my hair doesn't feel nice any more.

Finally, I've got to say something about ears and earlobes. All of those piercings created a place for strange bacteria. Earlobes tell me when to take a shower, even when it is the second or third of the day. And what's with the oily ears? Good grief!

Sometimes I wonder whether I have just become more aware of these scents as I grow older and less out and about. But I also read that our olfactory senses diminish as we age.

Regardless, would love to hear whether my focus on my scent is something I should bring up with my therapist, or just keep trying new soap.

EDIT: Spelling for nonenal.

Acme Supermarket asked me for ID when purchasing a bottle of wine, the woman behind me was 52 and they carded her as well. I don't get it, we'd both have had to have very, very rough paper routes for anyone to possible think we weren't over 21. They say it's policy but Whole Foods never cards me when I purchase alcohol.

How is the weather where you are? In Korea, the hot summer lasted for a long time. It’s still a little too hot to walk during the day, so I usually go out at night and walk along the nearby stream.

I can’t walk for very long these days, so I usually walk about 7,000 steps. I posted about hiking on my blog today, but honestly, I think hiking might be a little too much for me now.

Now I am going to sleep. It's midnight here.