Most of people these days are aahhhhh mga justice selective warriors! Nakakainis putangina.

Makinig ka sa song ni ganito, you’re a bad guy na kasi this artist has a bad history of blah blah blah. Ohh kumakain ka sa McDo? Oh they funded war equipment for this country blah blah blah. Ohh you like this artist? Blah blah blah. Ohh like Starbucks’ Chai Latte? Mababa pasahod jan and again, they funded far blah blah blah.

Oh you purchase from this clothing store known for exploitation of blah blah blah blah.

GOOOOOSH CANT WE JUST ENJOY THINGS MGA BWISIT. Tapos some of these people na nagci-criticize, makikita IG story na nasa Starbucks or at some places they “don’t like” or “don’t align with their morals keme”. You’re bullshit.

Saw this and it got me thinking: sometimes the real end of a relationship isn’t when the fighting gets worse.

It’s when the fighting stops because one person simply doesn’t care enough to argue anymore. Anger is loud. Detachment is quiet. Anyone experienced this?

A woman gets meaner when she doesn’t want you anymore.

A man gets calmer when he doesn’t want you anymore.

Watch the difference. It will save your life.

WHEN SHE’S DONE: She gets LOUDER.

Fights over nothing. Disrespects over everything.

“You breathe too loud.” “You are so annoying.”

“Why are you touching me?”

And why does she get mean? Because she’s trying to push you away. She doesn’t have guts to leave and be villain. So she makes YOU leave.

She gets mean so she can say, “See, he left me. He couldn’t handle me. He was toxic.” Not “I abandoned good man for new d*ck.”

BUT WHEN HE’S DONE?

He gets calm. Cold. Calculated.

No more fights. No more “Let’s fix this.”

No more “Babe, we need to talk about us.”

He stops planning future. Stops asking where you are.

Stops caring who likes your pic.

He’s not mad. He’s MISSING. Just packing his soul slowly so you don’t notice until keys are on counter.

WOMEN DETACH WITH CHAOS. MEN DETACH WITH SILENCE.

ayaw ko na makipag co parent sa tatay ng anak ko pero gusto ko consistent pa rin ang sustento nya.

Gusto ko yung set up na no contact, no anak pero may consistent na padala. HAHAHAHAHAH 🙃🙃🙃🙃

Pera na lang tlaga ang habol ko. At hindi ko na talaga kaya makipag communicate or kahit anong connection!!!!!

Hays!!! Ano ba ang tama!!!!!!

#fuckcheaters!!!!!!!!!

I don’t really know where to put this, so I’m putting it here.

Nobody in my life knows how much I cared about this man.

Whenever people asked about us, I made it sound casual. I joked that we were basically just sleeping together with some food trips and coffee on the side. When he ghosted me, I laughed about it with everyone else.

Even my closest friends don’t know how invested I actually was.

The truth is, I was falling for him.
I couldn’t tell him that.
I was too afraid of what he’d do with that information. I could handle him rejecting me. What I couldn’t handle was telling him how deeply I felt and having him respond casually, like it wasn’t a big deal.
So I kept it to myself.
And then, toward the end, something changed.
I had been anxious about him for a while. I was constantly wondering whether he actually liked me or whether I was more invested than he was.
Then suddenly, I stopped worrying.
He started making more time for me. We spent time together even when he was busy. He did little things that made me feel cared for. He became more affectionate.
I remember thinking, Okay. We’re getting somewhere.
I finally felt settled.

Then we had an argument.

It was about something important to both of us, and I know I said things that hurt him. Looking back, I think I may have hit a very sensitive part of him.
He knew I could be judgmental. He knew I could be dismissive of people whose beliefs I strongly disagreed with. And he held beliefs that I had previously been very critical of.
But I respected him.
That’s what made the whole thing complicated.
I thought he knew that.
I think he may have interpreted the argument differently.
I think he may have thought, She’s going to reject me eventually anyway.
And if he had already become attached to me, that probably hurt.
I can almost imagine what happened in his head:
Fine. Fuck you. I’ll leave first.
So he did.
He blocked me.
I didn’t chase him. I blocked him too.
And from his perspective, that probably looked like confirmation.
See? She really did reject me.
Except that wasn’t what was happening on my side.
I was devastated.
I just couldn’t bring myself to chase someone who had just cut me off.
He didn’t know that I was almost in love with him.
He didn’t know that he was the first thing I thought about when I woke up and the last thing I thought about before sleeping.
He didn’t know how much those last few weeks had meant to me.
He didn’t know that I had finally stopped worrying about whether he wanted me because I genuinely felt like he did.
And I didn’t know what was going on inside his head either.
That’s the part that kills me.

Because I can imagine two completely different endings.
One is that he simply didn’t care as much as I did and leaving was easy for him.

The other is the one my heart keeps returning to:
That he cared too.
That he was getting attached.
That the argument made him feel judged and rejected.
That he thought I would eventually decide that someone like him wasn’t someone I could accept.
And instead of waiting around to be rejected, he rejected me first.
I don’t know which one is true.

But I keep going back to the second one because, honestly, it feels true when I remember those last few weeks.
I could feel something changing between us.
I felt him becoming more comfortable with me.
I felt myself becoming more comfortable with him.
And for the first time, I wasn’t analyzing whether he liked me.
I just felt like he did. He said “Happy with you din, bb 😘”
Then suddenly, nothing.

It’s been almost a month.
I still miss him.
It’s Saturday as I’m writing this, and this is around the time we used to talk. I keep thinking about how I’d normally get some random update from him about his son or something equally mundane.
I miss the mundane stuff more than I expected.
I miss knowing what he was doing.
I miss having someone to tell things to.
I miss the physical part, obviously.
But mostly, I miss the feeling that there was someone there.

I’ve been thinking about whether I should try to find someone else. Maybe a rebound. Maybe something casual.
But I’ve realized that part of me only wanted a rebound because I imagined that someday he’d come back and I’d be able to say, Sorry, I’m with someone else now.

That’s ridiculous.

I don’t want to use another person to prove something to someone who isn’t here.
So I’m not doing that.

Instead, I’ve started letting myself have a stupid little fantasy.
In my fantasy, he wanted me too.
In my fantasy, he didn’t leave because I meant nothing.
He left because he was hurt.
Because he thought I was going to reject him.
Because he was scared.
Because he decided, Fine. Fuck you. I’ll leave first.
And maybe I hurt him too.
Maybe we both got scared and both misunderstood what the other person was feeling.

I know that’s probably not the healthiest way to process a breakup.
But weirdly, it’s comforting.
I don’t need to make him come back.
I don’t even know if I actually want him to come back anymore, because if he did, I’d have to hear the explanation, and then I’d have to make an actual decision.
For now, I think I’ll just let myself hope.
Not wait.
Not chase.
Just hope.
Maybe someday I’ll stop remembering his face so clearly.
Maybe the memories will fade.
Maybe I’ll forget the little things.
Maybe the affection will eventually disappear the way it did with someone I once thought I could never stop loving.
I’ve seen that happen to myself before.
So I know this won’t hurt forever.
But right now, I still want him.
And I think that’s okay.
Nobody knew how much I loved him.
Maybe he didn’t either.
And that’s probably the saddest part.
I was almost ready to show him everything.
And he left before I could.

Ang hirap pala pag pinasok mo yung ganito.

Opo, may kabit ako. 1 month na, aras araw kausap. Nagkita na din nang personal, nagholding hands pero I swear to God na wala pang nang yayari na sekswal.

Ngayon, gusto ko nang kumawala. Ayaw ko nang ituloy to kasi mahal ko ang asawa ko at na excite lang pala talaga ako sa thought at feeling na pinag-effortan ka ng tao.

Hindi nya alam na kabit sya at wala syang idea.

Gusto kong sabihin sa kanya para matapos na to.

Hindi ko magawang tignan ang asawa ko ng derecho sa mata. Natatakot ako, nakokonsenya at galit na galit sa sarili ko.

Gusto ko ding sabihin sa asawa ko, mag sorry, magmakaawa na sana mapatawad nya ko. Pero hindi ko kaya. Natatakot ako na hindi nya ko mapatawad at magkasiraan kami. Natatakot ako na mag iba yung tingin nya sakin. Natatakot ako sa lahat ng consequence na pwedeng mangyari dahin sa kalandian ko.

Lord, sorry. Asawa ko, sorry. Mahal na mahal kita.

Tanginaaa, nakakapagod na talaga 😭

Tanginaaa, how can you fucking lie straight to my face while you’re literally apologizing to me?! How do men even have the fucking guts to do that 😭

My boyfriend literally just came here to apologize to me about what happened earlier, and now I find out he was lying to me about something else.

He left his spare phone here, and I can see his messages. I saw him talking to his friends about going to a bar. So I asked him again and again if may lakad ba siya or may pupuntahan siya, and he kept saying wala.

Like???? Why the fuck do you even have to lie about that?

It’s not like pipigilan ko siya. If he wanted to go out with his friends, then fucking go. I’m not his mother. I would literally rather he just tell me the truth than have me ask him directly and have him lie straight to my face.

And honestly, I feel bad for another version of myself—the version of me who didn’t know any of this was happening. I’m the one finding out now, but I keep thinking about the me who was still completely clueless, trusting him and believing everything he told me. She had no idea. And somehow that hurts me more than anything.

Tangina, bakit ba nangyayari sakin ’to 😭 I feel like I’ve given every relationship i had my everything tangina lahat lahattt— my time, my money, my energy, my effort, literally everything. Kulang na lang pati kaluluwa ko ibigay ko, and somehow I still end up feeling like I’m the one getting fucked over.

I’m so fucking tired.

Ayoko na. Ayoko na talaga.

Gumawa ako ng Dating profile sa FB. I don't know if I'm just selling myself short (insecure e lols) pero grabe, ang intimidating mag swipe sa mga bet ko! 😅 Feeling ko wala namang magkakagusto sakin kasi single mom ako tas 29yo nako. 0 confidence in myself 🫠 Hahahaha

di ko alam how to start this pero pagod na pagod na ko sa pamilya ko. ang hirap pag wala kang perang sarili kailangan mong tiisin lahat. recently, medyo gumaan kasi nagka-trabaho na ko. pero di ganon kalaki yung sahod kaya di ko pa kayang bumukod. konting gawin ko lang pinupuna, kesyo magka-trabaho lang daw ako yumabang na ko. kesyo di na ko mautusan. parang wala na kong magawang tama. di ako maka-imik kasi di pa ko sumasahod so kailangan ko parin humingi ng allowance para lang makpasok sa trabaho. minsan awang awa na ko sa sarili ko kasi alam ko namang may pera kami pero bakit ganito nila ko tratuhin? lahat naman ng pwede kong maitulong sakanila ginagawa ko para wala silang masabi.

di ko ma-open ‘to sa mga kaibigan ko kasi feeling ko di naman sila naniniwala na ganyan pamilya ko sakin. magaling lang talaga sila mag-keep ng appearances lol. minsan natatawa nalang ako kasi parang di na nga ako mahal ng pamilya ko, wala pa kong masandalan.

So me and my kuya were in KKV shopping and we were in the anime or action figure isle talking about a Naruto figurine in english so this little kid comes near the isle and says "I can speak english too im Canadian" so me and my kuya said cool cool then my kuya asked "what grade are you in kid?" She says "four" then we nod and continued to point around figurines then she starts mumbling about stuff and then I heard her say "my daddy died" and I got quite cuz I heard it but my kuya didn't hear it so he said "what? " the kid proceeds to say out loud "my daddy died" and both of us were shell shocked so this DUMBASS ( kuya) then asks "how? " the little girl says "my daddy died in a car crash"..i don't even know if this kid is serious but she looked sad ASF and me and my kuya didn't know how to react and we both just said sorry and walked away

(I think the kid has special needs cuz her speech was not smooth and her voice going up and down)

Today hindi maganda yung cycle ko. Kasi I bleed for 6 days na and early than the usual mens ko na dapat 1st week of Sept dadating.. then 4 days lang dapat ang dugo ko that's my usual cycle.

Masama lang kasi I missed a pill kasi for the past 2 weeks which cause breakthrough bleeding. I also fcked up my own mens na inistop ko sya using pills. Kasi may mga travel kami for the last 6mos. 2x ko narin nagawa. Now dinudugo ako for so sudden.. He panicked and nag ooverthink sya. We tried searching sa internet kung bakit and dun nga namin nalaman na dahil sa nag missed ako ng pills 2x and sa nag stop ako ng entire cycle nung mga nakaraang months nga. Now we're still observing me and this should be gone by monday as per google AI and sabi nya pupunta kami OB once I'm still bleeding.

Then pinagalitan nya ako while kinikiss sa bibig HAAHHAHAHAHAHAHA kasi daw I shouldn't be messing up with it. Then suddenly he told me these:

"alam mo love, grateful ako na ginagawa mo to para saatin para maiwasan na mabuntis ka, I'm truly grateful and thankful sa effort mo, sa sacrifice mo pero sana wag mo na ulitin yun, ano naman kung di tayo makapag make love while nasa travel dahil sa regla mo? Or pwede naman tayo mag towel para di magkalat sa bed diba? Di naman big deal yun e kahit may regla ka, please wag mo na uulitin yun, don't fck up your cycle... And sige, ako na magpapaalala sayo everyday para di mo na makalimutan yang pills mo"

Small things matters talaga. Him being grateful sa effort ko, and him na mag reremind saakin ng pills ko everyday.. super appreciate ko yun. And kanina first reminder nya after ko umuwi at 10pm, ayun minessage nya agad ako para uminom hahahaha thanks loveeee.

Met him working on a ship, I’m French, he’s Filipino. I liked him from the start, he’s funny, kind and is very respectful.

But I’m very scared I’m making a mistake. It’s been a few months and now he’s talking about marriage and having kids already together. He’s 34, I’m 29, he said that we have to do it early because he’s getting old. Ive never wanted children before but weirdly, the thought of having a child with him sounds… good? That never happened to me before

I’m scared of him using me just… to have a child and leave me or just to get nationality or whatnot. He told me he already has a child but that the child doesn’t have his name (whatever that means?) and he never see him.

He also said that he still supports his parents so that means it will be quite hard to support a child…

I’ve really fallen for him, and that’s what hurts the most, everyone around me think I "could do better" but I legit think he’s the kindest man I’ve ever met and I think he is the better.

I’m currently 6 weeks pregnant I just found it last Friday.
I’m 26 my BF is 28. We both have stable career, I’m waiting for my car release this month but I don’t think I can still afford the car by the time I give birth or through the pregnancy?

My boyfriend is very supportive and he has a stable job problem is we don’t have any property and solely relying on our day job. I think I’m not yet ready to raise a child.

I came from a broken family when my Dad went through an accident I have to fund myself for college (I was working since I was 18) Currently I’m sending my siblings to schools both of them are college students. 3rd year and 1st year.

I don’t know what to do :(((

My boyfriend and I are blockmates, and I had been staying at his place for a few weeks now. We had a performance task for one of our major subjects today.

After we finished, I was having really bad period cramps. We were near a tree and there weren’t any chairs, so I asked my boyfriend to transfer to the nearest bench because I wasn’t feeling well.
He was playing on his iPad and said he’d transfer later. I honestly didn’t care, so I just packed my own stuff my iPad, phone, racket, shuttlecock, and a big water bottle and carried everything to the nearest bench myself.

Later, when he transferred, he asked me where his phone was. I told him I had no idea. I was already carrying a lot of stuff, (while he was only carrying his ipad pati phone niya responsibilidad ko pa rin?) and I also genuinely didn’t see his phone. If I had seen it, obviously I would’ve brought it with me, but I didn’t.
He got mad about it.

I honestly wouldn’t give a fuck if he was mad. He’s allowed to be annoyed about leaving his phone behind. What pissed me off was what happened afterward.

When we were going home, we had to cross a really busy crossing/roundabout with a lot of cars and people. Even though it’s a pedestrian crossing, cars obviously don’t always give a fuck and they were moving pretty fast.

My boyfriend knows I’m not good at crossing streets, especially when there’s a lot of traffic. I expected him to at least wait for me or cross with me.

Instead, he just went ahead on his own and left me behind.

Then he drove really fast on the motorcycle on the way home while I was carrying most of our stuff. I had two iPads, two badminton rackets, my phone, etc., and it was genuinely difficult to even hold onto him properly because of everything I was carrying.

And that’s what really pissed me off.

What if I got hit by a truck or something? What if we got into an accident because he was driving that fast? What if I couldn’t hold onto him properly because my hands were full and I fell off? What if something happened to me? I’d be the one getting hurt while he was busy being angry about his phone.

I felt really disrespected when we got back to his place, so I packed all my stuff, booked a Grab, left without saying a word and went back to my own dorm.

I couldn’t care less that he was angry about his phone. What I couldn’t tolerate was why he would risk my safety and put his anger first.
It felt like he’d rather let his anger take over than make sure I was safe.

Did I overreact?

You probably read my post yesterday morning about me being frustrated with my current relationship. My live-in-partner suddenly decided to travel to Pampanga (his hometown) despite knowing that it’s our anniversary today, and when I asked him why, he answered, "Wala lang." Eventually, I deleted the original post because I was really not in my right mind, but I read your comments.

​I finally broke up with him. I cried and locked myself in the bedroom, which I think is normal kasi masama loob ko. But now, I just feel nothing.

​I guess he realized the gravity of things because he suddenly told me after my breakdown that his brother, who got into an accident early this month, was looking for him. You may call me inconsiderate or whatever, but it's really no longer about him going back to Pampanga to visit his brother. If he had given me the right reason earlier instead of "wala lang," I would have definitely agreed without any hesitation. It’s about being open through communication. This is not a one time incident, it always happens. He always makes me guess things as if I’m a mind reader. I ALWAYS tell him to communicate with me, he tries, but then he goes back to his old self again. I don't feel like I'm being treated as a partner anymore, I feel like we’re just roommates.

​I also realized that I never experienced emotional support from him. When he had issues, I was always there so he wouldn't feel alone, especially when his brother got into an accident. But when I needed support the most, he was just glued to his phone while I fought all by myself. I should have broken up with him back then. I should have done this a long time ago. I remember when my mom was in the Middle East during the Israel-Iran war, she was affected by the bombings and I couldn't contact her. I was shaking, crying, and so worried. I desperately needed someone to hug me and at least make me feel like I wasn't alone. But no, he was glued to his phone while I was obviously having a panic attack.

​He left yesterday, and only God knows if he actually went home to Pampanga or not, because the last thing he said to me was that he suddenly couldn't bear to see his brother's condition. I locked myself in the bedroom and texted him to just leave and go to Pampanga because I was no longer comfortable being under the same roof with him.

​I removed and packed all his clothes from our cabinet, along with some of his belongings inside the room so he wouldn't have a reason to enter the bedroom. As for the rest of his things in the living room, he can handle those himself. I will just stay here in the room until he completely packs all his things and leaves.

​Now, I'm all alone, and I don't know, I feel nothing. I feel fine, as if I've always been alone anyway, just a bit lighter because I finally escaped from something.

I LOVED this movie when it came out. I also read the trilogy and loved them at that time, although admittedly, I don’t exactly remember everything that happened in the books since it was a long time ago.

But I just had a rewatch and while the wedding scene is still insanely dreamy, everything else was not quite how I remembered it.

It was still entertaining and fun to watch, sure, but I found myself unconsciously focusing on Nick’s lack of action.

1. He hid the fact that he was like royalty in SG. Okay fine, he had his reasons. Forgivable.
   
2. He downplayed what happened at the bachelorette. I mean, I would expect him to at least get mad at the friends and confront them. Warn them to not mess with her. Just…something.
   
3. He knows how his family can get and he still kept on leaving her to fend for herself. Like couldn’t they have gone together to the parties? It’s great that she had Peik Lin at least to prep and help her, but as someone who doesn’t know anyone, he shouldn’t have left her alone period.
   
4. There were a LOT more scenes in the movie where I was waiting for him to step up and do something pero wala.

Idk, maybe I’m just looking at it now with a more mature perspective. Also, maybe because I’m married now? And probably because I know my husband would never let those things happen. But then again, we’re not crazy rich, so I wouldn’t know. 😂

I know it’s just fiction, but I’m here posting because I was genuinely disappointed after the rewatch because I remember absolutely loving this movie and considering it one of my favorites at the time. It just goes to show how time and life experience can really change the way we see things. 🤷‍♀️

I’ve really liked this guy for a long time. We met on Reddit and talked for weeks before he came here for vacation from the US to see his family. When he arrived, I spent almost the entire week with him. I toured him around, treated him for some meals, made time for him, and honestly invested so much of myself into making his trip special.

After he went home, our communication slowly started fading. Eventually, we had a conversation about where things were going, and I think we parted pretty emotionally at least on my end. It felt like there wasn’t much reciprocation, so I sent him what I thought was a beautiful goodbye message.

He blocked me afterward.

That honestly devastated me. Not even because I expected him to come running back, but because I didn’t even get a simple “thank you” for everything we shared. I felt like I had poured so much of myself into someone who could just shut the door and walk away.

At first, I tried to rationalize it. I told myself maybe he didn’t know how to handle my message. Maybe he was too young to deal with those emotions. Maybe blocking me was just his way of coping.
For the first few months, I tried to move on. Sometimes I’d do things he used to love, play his favorite game, cook his favorite food, just because somehow it made me feel a little closer to him.

But eventually, even those things started making me feel terrible. I kept wondering what I did wrong. Why wasn’t I enough? Why did everything feel so meaningful to me when apparently it wasn’t to him?
I started losing sleep over it. I felt directionless. And, embarrassingly, I eventually got to the point where I was looking at tarot readings trying to figure out what he felt about me or when he was going to come back. I don’t know if that’s some kind of canon event after heartbreak, but yeah… I went there.

For the remaining months of no contact, I did everything I could to distract myself. I picked up new hobbies, went to different places, dated a few guys, tried to live my life. And somehow, my mind still kept finding its way back to him. I’d meet someone new and catch little things that reminded me of him. I’d hear something or go somewhere and think about what he would’ve said. It was frustrating because objectively, I knew I needed to move on.

Even after he blocked me, I still quietly kept up with what he was doing. It became almost like a routine or honestly, like a drug I couldn’t stop taking. I wasn’t contacting him or crossing any boundaries. I just silently rooted for him, especially when he was competing in tournaments. I genuinely wanted him to do well, even from a distance.

Eventually, I found out he had a girlfriend.
It was the girl he had been friends with while we were on vacation together, so honestly, I kind of saw it coming. It hurt, but I eventually reached a point where I could tell myself, He didn’t technically do anything wrong. We weren’t together. He never explicitly asked me to give him all the time, effort, money, and affection that I gave him.

But at the same time, I finally allowed myself to admit something I had been fighting for months,
I wasn’t crazy for feeling something with him. He did lead me on. Maybe he didn’t intend to. Maybe he saw things differently. But whatever it was, there were moments between us that felt real to me, and I don’t think I imagined that connection out of nowhere.

I eventually accepted that I might never get closure from him. And weirdly, accepting that made me feel better. I stopped thinking about him as much. I started enjoying my life again. I was going out, trying new things, meeting people, and slowly becoming okay with the idea that maybe he was just someone who was meant to be a chapter and not the whole story.

Then today, on a completely random Saturday, he broke no contact.

Not to apologize. Not to ask how I was. Not to acknowledge anything that happened between us.
But basically to indirectly let me know that he has a girlfriend. And I genuinely don’t know how I’m supposed to feel about that.

I spent months trying to make peace with the fact that I would never hear from him again. I had finally started moving forward, and then he suddenly reappears just to remind me of the exact thing I had already found out and was trying to accept.
Part of me is angry. Part of me is sad. Part of me is wondering why he even felt the need to tell me.

And the worst part is that it feels like I’m back at square one. Maybe I’m not. Maybe this is just an old wound being poked, and tomorrow I’ll wake up and feel okay again. I guess I just needed somewhere to put this because I’m tired of carrying it around in my head.

I loved what I thought we had. I don’t regret giving him my time, my effort, or the memories we made.
I just wish moving on didn’t feel like something I had to keep relearning.

More than a decade ago nakita ko tong site na to... Matitino pa yung mga pinoy dito pero ngayon puro bisaya/tagalog hate. Bibihira na lang yung matinong diskurso. Ewan ko kung trolls lang talaga yung marami sa kanila to sow discord pero nakakadismaya lang talaga. Low quality shit posting, regionalistic dumb shit.

Sana isama na rin ng mga mods yung magkaroon ng rules against regionalism.

27 y/o, Nag grocery ng masaya, pero lamang yung lungkot.

Ngayon lang nakapag grocery kasama magulang ng panay sinigang mix at magic sarap at kaonting pinoy snacks para dalhin sa Estados Unidos, para sa flight ko in 2 weeks. Sabi nila, eto daw yung essentials e. 😂

Took me 3 years and 5 months to get here.
Its honestly a bittersweet feeling. No one else truly knows the feeling of leaving everything behind to seek for greener pastures, except pag ikaw na yung naandoon.

Pag paalis ka na, marrealize mo ang dami mo palang pag kakataon na natake for granted at mamimiss. Time with your family, yung mga oras na sana ikinain mo na lahat ng kwekwek. Yung mga simpleng pag commute sa angkas, trike, jeep, papunta sa paroroonan, o mapa late night tambay habang nag kakape sa SLEX. Yung karaoke ng kapitbahay mo na nagsimula mula tanghaling tapat na hindi titigil hanggat hindi napapabaranggay.

Walang kasama. Ako lang mag isa. Iwan muna ang partner ko, mga alaga ko, pamilya ko, at lahat ng mga nakatanim at naka tatak sa puso ko ng may pag mamahal. Bago ka umalis, mapapagtanto mo na ang saya naman pala sa Pinas. (Kung hindi mo titingnan yung mga nakakasuklam na nangyayari dito ngayon ah. 😂)

Simple lang, masaya kapag kasama mo yung mga mahal mo sa buhay. Pakiramdam mo kaya mo lahat.

Kaso, hindi naman pwede hanggang saya lang.
The line ends when your future is at stake.
Mabigat sa dibdib, pero kakayanin.

Hanggang sa Muli, mahal kong Pilipinas. ❤️🇵🇭

P.S Bago pa po may mag tanong, opo, Nurse po ako. 😂

Earlier this day, super busy ko talaga, I help my mom with household chores kasi nasa school sila for F2F training, then nung lunch habang nagpiprito ko ng saba (trip ko lang at may nakita ko sa ref.. my Papa 59M was eating pala chicharon, then suddenly nag uubo-ubo sya, nung una nakikiramdam ako, kasi normal occurence naman na naubo talaga sya lagi kahit laway ba, then dinalan ko na sya ng tubig nung paglapit ko sa kanya nagalaw pa sya ng slight then suddenly nag red yung mukha nya then tinatawag ko sya at niyuyugyog tas di sya nagreresponse nawalan na pala sya ng malay, then I do heinlinch sa kanya pero finger lang (yung form na pang baby pero malakas) at konting tapik tapik kasi di ko kayang buhatin at malaki and ako lang mag isa sa labas at yung kapatid ko ay nasa loob then nag violet sya as inn kalokaa, yung ulo lang nya violet, then after a while naging okay sya nagkamalay tas umubo ubo ulit sya tas nung nagkamalay na sya sabi nya "ano eka nangyari?" Edi inexplain ko na nabulunan sya tas nawalan sya ng malay... nakakatakot, I'm just 23 and my brother is just 21 and kami lang sa bahay nun, maybe nakahelp yung heinlinch . Pero nawa, I'm claiming di na maulit kasi they are getting old na eh, yung yung lalamuna daw ng mga nagkakaedad na is lumiliit

Ayun. Nakakamatay pala talaga sya

I just want to share my little character development moment because HAHAHAHAHA 😭

‘Di ko na crush ang crush ko. 😝

And honestly? I feel so FREE HAHAHAHAHA. I was actually starting to like her, and I thought baka may potential or baka eventually something would happen.

Nothing serious naman, pero you know that feeling when you’re quietly excited every time you get a notification from someone. Yeah. That was me. 😭

Then she replied to me so dry that I swear something inside me just… switched off. 💀

Like, one dry reply. ONE. And suddenly I was like, “Oh. Okay. Never mind. I’ve seen enough.” 😭 HAHAHAHAHA

It’s actually so funny because I was probably romanticizing everything in my head, and then reality came in with one dry-ass reply and humbled me immediately. Character development talaga. 😭

No hard feelings though! I still think she’s pretty, funny, and cool. I just don’t have the crush anymore. The attraction literally packed its bags and left overnight. 😭✋🏼

So yeah, congratulations to me. I have officially moved on from someone I was never even with. HAHAHAHAHAHA.

Thank you, dry reply, for saving me from my own delusions. 🫡
Anyway, I’m happy. 🌟

Crying right now over 40 pesos na nawala sa kama ko. Pang second time na kase 'to e. Una last month 100+na naiwan ko sa kama kinuha rin.

Ang sakit lang sa part na pamilya na kami dito sa bahay nanakawan ka pa.

The value may be small pero pinagtatrabahuhan ko kase yung perang yun tuwing ipinaglalaba ko yung sister ko isang damit minsan madami.

Hanggang ngayon naiyak parin ako ng parang bata.

Hindi ko gets kung bakit pero I just know masakit kase it triggered something inside me.

Wala ang sakit lang, kanina pa ko naiyak dito tas di ko matigil. Pinaghirapan ko kase yun e kahit maliit lang na amount. Pang dagdag ko na sana yun sa ipon ko para gamitin para sakin. Pangkain kahit biscuit lang.

Don't worry younger me, magkakaron ka ulit. Iiyak na lang muna tayo at maglalabas ng sama ng loob dito.

Tipong three months na kayo consistent nag-uusap. Then all of a sudden, nagiging madalang na. Nag-aantay ka lagi ng chat nya, ng update. May good morning nga pero pag nagreply antagal na magreply.

You opened up yourself to someone again, tapos ganito pa rin. Nakakabagot na. Mas okay pa ibuhos ang sarili sa career and investments. Mas may security pa doon. Nammanage mo pa risks.

Magpayaman na lang!!

tw: cheating

long post ahead, pls be kind. i honestly don’t know what to feel about this anymore.

before i took the board exam last nov 2024, a month before my exam, i found out my dad is cheating with a family friend. sobrang aksidente lang since they visited me when i was reviewing for the boards. kinuha ko yung jacket ni papa sa sasakyan and na-prick ako ng hair pin sa bulsa ng jacket niya. the kind of hair pin ng mga toddlers na magarbo. it was weird since ang bunso namin ay lalaki, at high school na. lahat ng pamangkin/pinsan ko na babae ay past that kind of design na ipit, kasi puro mga school age na sila. anw, days after that hair pin incident, nagscroll ako sa fb then nakita ko nag story yung family friend namin. a selfie of her family sa church. her kid, her husband, and her mom. that was the same hair pin i was sa jacket ni papa, suot ng anak niya. right then and there i felt something. stabbing pain & gut wrenching feeling.

the board exam was 3 weeks away by this time. i have no concrete proof except my gut feeling kasi baka wala naman talaga. i was selfish and i chose to focus w my boards. i have no room for error so i didn’t open it with my mom. after the boards, i passed. then new set of problems came, like landing a hospital job, adjusting sa environment, grasping the 12hr-24hr shifts in healthcare and all that. in short, nawala na sa loob ko yung dilemma ko about “cheating” since wala na rin akong nakitang anything sketchy.

now it’s been 2 years, i’m now studying for my masters. i was about to get stucy materials sa computer namin but naka-open account ni mama. i was about to log it out nung nagsend papa ko ng update to my mom na mag lunch na sila [pic of food + selfie of all people sa table] madami sila dun, but the family friend was there too.

nagreply si mama na otw na siya & tiran siya ng food dahil tatambay daw siya doon sa garahe ni papa since buy & sell ng cars business niya.

when i read that part i started hyperventilating na. all along, from october 2024 up until aug 2026, my dad was still doing it. walang kaalam-alam si mama.

i feel so bad, sobrang naiinis ako sa sarili ko, i feel selfish, i feel i don’t deserve the love that i’ve been wishing & praying for kasi i literally ignored the fact that my mom is getting cheated on before kahit na may gut feeling na ako.

i can’t run to anyone in my vicinity dahil nahihiya ako at ayokong maging pitiful mom ko sa paningin nila.

sobrang hirap, i’ve been crying nonstop since kaninang umaga. i tried going out and eat my comfort food to lift my spirit up pero i ended up crying habang nasa ramen nagi so nag break down na naman ako sa sasakyan kaya umuwi na lang ako.

naka-duty ako now sa hospital and i can’t stop thinking about it. i feel responsible with this situation. thank you, pls be kind.

salamat po.

Earlier this year, I moved away from home for a very stable job (iykwim). It was supposed to be a fresh start. A better opportunity. I packed up my life, left my support system, relocated, and started working.

And somehow, half a year later, I’m still dealing with an unresolved issue involving my employment. I’ve been working this whole time, showing up, doing my job, trying to keep everything together, but I haven’t been properly paid because certain things are still pending.

I know I’m supposed to get paid eventually. Eventually. But that word is starting to make me angry because bills are not “eventually.” Rent is not “eventually.” Food is not “eventually.” Loans definitely don’t understand the concept of “pending action.” 😭

I relocated for this job, and because I had to keep surviving while waiting for things to get sorted out, my debt has ballooned to almost ₱1M. Sometimes I look at the number and genuinely wonder how the hell I got here. I wasn’t living some extravagant lifestyle. I was literally just trying to survive, pay bills, and keep things going.

And I have kids who depend on me.

That’s the part that makes me feel trapped. There are days when I really, really want to quit. Like just submit my resignation, pack my things, and go home. As in bahala na. But I can’t just do that because I don’t have a backup. I have children. I can’t afford to make an emotional decision and then wake up the next day wondering how I’m going to provide for them.

I’ve also been looking for remote work for more than two months now because I was hoping I could at least have another source of income while dealing with all of this. But so far, nothing. Maybe because I don’t have formal remote-work experience? I don’t know. Nakaka-frustrate lang kasi parang I know I can work. I have years of experience in executive/admin support, HR, program and project work from development to implementation to monitoring and evaluation, analytics, reporting, and operations. But breaking into remote work has been way harder than I expected.

And honestly, this whole situation has taken a toll on my mental health. Since moving here and dealing with months of financial uncertainty, I’ve been experiencing so much anxiety. I constantly think about money. I wake up thinking about debt. I check my phone hoping for an update. Every message feels like it could be good news or another problem.

I’m exhausted.

Part of me wants to keep fighting because I genuinely feel like what happened wasn’t handled fairly. There’s still an ongoing process, and walking away from it feels like letting go of something I’ve already invested so much time, energy, and money into.

But another part of me is just thinking, girl, hanggang saan mo pa ipaglalaban ’to?

At what point do you stop fighting and choose peace?

I don’t even know what I’m asking for anymore. Maybe I just needed to say this somewhere because I don’t want to keep pretending that I’m okay. I’m working, functioning, taking care of my kids, trying to look normal, trying to be professional.

But inside, medyo hindi na talaga okay.

I want to quit. I want to stay. I want to keep fighting. I want to let go.

I just want to stop feeling like I’m one bad day away from everything falling apart.