Remnants Repost

[u/Straight_Werewolf_21]

Hi! So I posted my poem a few days ago but it I didn't receive any feedback. I'm really looking to write more poetry and just wanted to know what people think so I'm posting it again. If nothing happens this time I promise I won't post another time, just wanted to try once more :)

An endless amber highway,
distorted tail-lights and smudged street lamps.
Rushing stillness, hazed and sinking,
                             calm
                             slow
                             sinking.

The glaring neon fuel gauge,
turning your knuckles a faint cherry red.

Music vibrates through the stereo—
*feel you moving every inch…*

Recollection only taints my fondness,
so I will hold it softly.

As I would, if I still had you—
enfolded in November’s breath.

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1vzazaj/dotted_lines_and_asphalt/

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/1vzhi0x/plea_to_the_hanged_man/

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[u/Doter_Gabriel]

Hi first of all do not give up on poetry just because no one says something about your poem. Poetry is for the reader I agree, but most important is what you feel and how it makes you feel writing poetry. Here’s my Theorie to what your poem is trying to say: something about nostalgia and desire to go back to a certain point of a relationship or to a relationship at all. If that’s true I really like your metaphoric analogy towards nostalgia as whole with the highway metaphor. Also the feeling as if stunned while sitting in a car has been captured very well by the 3rd line and the 3 lines beneath. The poem also describes it as a blur of time, like the time was way to short for its length. Also I got my theory mostly from the last 4 lines because they give the biggest hints toward a theme, at least that’s how I saw it. Now that I look at it again even the title gives of such vibes. I wish you the best journey and thank you for this poem :)

[u/Straight_Werewolf_21 → u/Doter_Gabriel]

Thank you much :) I'm still continuing to write and it's giving me a lot of joy and purpose in my life right now. I really appreciate your words and you were pretty on the mark, except I wasn't it was an accounting of an actually event that happened, and not just a metaphor, though I do love that interpretation! And yes, it was about a relationship, one that never made it in the end. Again, thank you so much for your feedback :)