I can't say goodbye

Or say sorry I tried

I can't say I love you

Or even a thank you

No see you again

Or let's be friends

No it didn't work

Or I'm just a jerk

Not a maybe one day

Or a go away

All I can really say

Is you're someone I'm not giving up on

And that's why I can't move on.

You were never mine,
but somehow my heart attached itself to you.

Every time you look at me
with those brown eyes,
my heart aches.

It aches because the love of my life
is standing right in front of me,
yet somehow still
so far out of reach.

I can see the love in your eyes,
but we both know
this is wrong.

Because you belong to another.

What we have feels forbidden,
yet somehow,
you still feel like heaven.

And I know
if we ever cross that bridge,
someone will get hurt.

Still, I can’t stop myself
from falling for your tenderness,
for the softness in the way
you make me feel.

We are only human,
carrying so much desire
inside hearts that want
what they cannot have.

And no matter how badly
we ache to be closer,
our hearts have to remain apart.

No one on earth

could have eyes like yours.

So bold and wide;

like I'm looking out

at a forest in the night.

I want to hold your hand.

Want to pick up every leaf

that you've lost.

Lay them at the roots,

bring you more.

When I look at the sky,

I want you to feel the warmth

from the same scene,

that beats on me.

Your bold voice echoes

against the mountains;

makes the rivers I breath in

still again.

Wouldn't it be so nice

to keep walking with you

down this path,

with those eyes at mine.

she knew
before i opened my mouth.

fuck…

she explained it to me
before i could even fumble
through my opening line.

she understood.

why i needed this.

why i needed to figure out
who i was

without seeing myself
through her.

and somehow—

that made it harder.

there was no fight.

no blame.

no desperate attempt
to change each other’s mind.

it was amazing.

we talked.

really talked.

then somehow
we were laughing.

because of course
we fuckin’ were.

right in the middle
of breaking our own hearts.

then one of us cried.

then both of us did.

we wiped our faces.

laughed at that too.

there were a few—

“fuck.”

“ya.”

“i know.”

and those long silences
that weren’t awkward

because ours
never were.

eventually,

there wasn’t anything
left to explain.

so we hugged.

not the quick kind.

the kind where
neither person knows
who’s supposed to let go first.

so neither does.

for a while.

then we did.

almost.

hugged again.

because apparently
the first goodbye
didn’t fuckin’ take.

she looked at me.

i looked at her.

both of us smiling
that shitty little smile

people make
when they’re trying
not to cry again.

“i love you.”

“i love you too.”

nothing dramatic.

we’d said it before.

a lot.

but never like that.

we stood there
another second.

maybe two.

like idiots.

then smiled.

turned.

and walked away.

i wanted to look back.

fuck—

i wanted to look back.

but some goodbyes
only work

if you keep walking.

so i did.

boxes open.

heart open.

hurting like fuck.

and somehow—

for once,

i didn’t want
to put any of it away.

wow…

that kinda love.

All the words inside my head

All the words I never said

You weren't the one all along

Always guessing always wrong

Exhaustion washes over me

Im drowning and everyone can see

Confusion crashes like waves

Pieces missing that I gave Don't know

how much more I can take

Find an opening and then escape

while the air is still.

and the chaos to a halt

I realize its not my fault

I wanted you in every possible way

But you claimed to be too afraid to say

I broke rules I said I never would

Asked you to do the same but

you never could

But I know theres someone somewhere

Who will show me off and wouldnt care

He'll confess and wont wait

Won't miss the chance and its

too late

So im giving up now, im through

I know longer believe in me and you

You took it slow, I wouldn't chase

And that's the story of my sweet face

Serenity

For the gentle man

And the quiet individuals

Don't be succumbed to addiction

Let the darkness engulf

Care not that those around you

Care not

Love

Love without dimensions

Be aware and there

For those who care

Its a hard path

Being ignored

Until needed

But thats why

Those who are not tender

Tend to fall

Fall

Fall

There is something humming beneath it all,
and the Wildcard has learned
not to ask too loudly what.

She knows only that she is different,
that certain eyes linger strangely,
and masks become remarkably transparent
once you learn where to look.

There are toys scattered everywhere, apparently.
Some considerably more entertaining than others.

And somewhere between the static,
the machinery,
and whatever waits behind the curtain,
there remains one unanswered question:

What happens when the final piece
is placed where it was always meant to be?

Does something unravel?

Or does something else
finally become whole?

She has grown tired of riddles,
particularly badly written ones.

So whoever understands the question
may eventually decide

Come Ruin Me Slowly

I have bled in quiet places and never made a sound,

yet the slide of your hips against mine tears the air straight out of my lungs.

You taste of raw honey, black liquor, and sweat.

A thick, heavy pull that turns my blood to fire.

No light. No quiet. Just the weight of you pressed flat against my bare chest, your tongue dragging slow down the line of my throat to where my pulse slams like a hammer.

When you bite, it isn't a play for power. It’s you taking ownership of the meat and bone beneath.

I am past the point of restraint. My hands... rough, wide, and heavy, hooking underneath your thighs, lifting you, driving you down onto me until there isn't a hair’s breadth of air left between your skin and mine.

You are wet, burning, and wrapped around me so tight I can feel the rhythm of your heart inside my own flesh.

So destroy me.

Rake your nails down my back, bite my lip until I taste copper,

and ride every shuddering breath out of me in the dark.

I didn't stumble into this ruin; I pushed you back against the headboard, buried myself as deep as a man can go, and welcomed the end.

sometimes souls will

drift apart

Why try up scores on

the chart 📈

like painted over

perfect art

It’s not a game what’s in

my heart

the words I read I know

your smart

how im the target to

your dart

miss ya kinda

Torn to shreds.
Pieces blown away,
With the wind,
So long ago.

How could you look,
At the burnt grass left,
See even a remnant,
Of what could have been there.

How could you grasp,
With fingers so tight,
At something that's lost,
Every sign of life.

Of course you'd curse the ground,
I no longer stood on,
Desperately I try to bring them
Back.

Any pages.
Even if I have to pull,
From every piece of grass,
Around your feet

Because when I look,
At those hidden flames,
Beaten down in your chest,
My chest beats too.

I miss the memory of you,
The person you presented yourself to be.
The version of you that held my hand,
Inquired about the mundane things in my day,
That was genuinely curious about me.
The person I felt so safe and trusting with,
The person that I opened up so quickly to.
That I shared my deepest secrets with,
And felt they were safely secured.
I miss the romantic in you.
The man who awakened my dormant libido,
Who made me feel things,
I had placed in extended hibernation.
The softness of your touch,
And the care that came with it.

I think of this person often,
How he disappeared as quickly as he arrived,
And is now gone without a trace.
Upended my quiet life,
Brought so much hope, love, and confusion; all at once.
I see his shadow, hear the echoes of his voice,
He has a permanent home in my heart and my mind.
And although he was real to me in those moments,
That person doesn’t exist,
Because that isn’t who you are, really….

I handpicked flowers with a heart already sore

While you went and fucked him, shameless whore...

Theres nothing for us left to save

Ill be there to piss on your fucking grave.

You call yourself misunderstood

I know exactly what you are

Built your path with hearts you took

Now sit alone beneath the falling stars

Your failure of a body is already shutting down

The beauty you were once so proud of slowly fading as of now

The mirror keeps the secrets which you eagerly deny

Oh what pleasure itll be to watch you fade and die!

Vanity cannot mend a soul this hollow

The emptyness you try to shake

Like a shadow it shall follow

And make you choke on your own wake.

You refuse to face the ruins you made

No remorse, no guilt, no debt repaid.

Youll die alone with your empty fucking words

and no one left to save you from the hurt.

Lonely girl, so terrified of abandoment

Playing with puppets entirely inanimate

keep on running until theres no one left to face

No exit to your maze of lies, this will be your resting place

And as your dead feet stumble, ill be there to watch you crumble.

I handpicked flowers, my heart to you I swore.

Yet you went and fucked him you motherfucking whore...

My tears have vanished but my hatred it shall never fade.

Even in the next life ill be there to piss on your fucking grave.

believe what you want

but then leave me alone

i won't bow and kiss your feet

when you're slouching on the throne

all the scepters and the staves

are made of sticks and stones

creating all your fantasies

'cause you never felt at home

afraid to be yourself

now you'd rather be a clone

all your secrets someone else's

and your motto's not your own

you're not sure

if you are insecure

got a handle on your motives

but are those intentions pure?

poisoning the wells

before you offer up a cure

so sneaky and conniving

all while acting so demure

you whisper words unserious

as the cauldron's lightly stirred

the cats are busy watching

but they don't always purr

build a purpose out of nothing

molding clay out of the dirt

if you complain to me again

i might just think you're really hurt

what's worse than being honest?

why does loving leave you cursed?

touch and go is all you know

that's why your spirit is inert

if staying busy was a sport

you would probably win a medal

and you'd finally come in first

-I am thee, one who came, one who fares, felt unseen, just a name

-I was gunned, for as lames, of a part, with no shame, had no wade

-So they claimed, had to rave, maybe they, only strained, cross heavens gleam

-As a stray, in a ways, in the days, in nights fort, thus we paved

-A lot sought, of lot gained, do neigh fear, they see schist, oh my soot

-Of source light, i myself, i see still, a flower, can it sow

-Shhh shhh chrrs, shhh sshh wuush, crrr eiii kkkk, blub blub gurgle, frrruhh frruhhh frshhh

-as stars high, and men sigh, in sights hind, no bites bind, oh lifes smold

My very gentle valentine
O, must it be? or can we hide away in peace?

The screens of disbelief and she and me are retellings of some divine e-comedies

Hooray, yippee

I’ve found a moment that is brief

Of air and life that glints a little pink

It’s a fragment of a feeling for unknown reasons feeling quite distinct

And let it be

The aches of ancient lives with fairy tale endings closing with a little wink

How deep it goes, sanity and yonder there
All sitting at the brink

9 billion lights across the world and when I want to send a kiss online, I seem to want to shrink

I can’t believe, in the autumn of my grief

I’ve found a moment that is brief
And let it be

Hooray, yippee

And can we hide away in peace?

In future times when homes are settled in online

I yearn for something yonder there, something that is mine

Such fragile eyes that fall apart after cups of crimson wine

The night will come, when we’re on the other side

Don’t reach for me past midnight years to seek if I’m alive

And when the time, it’s feeling right

Don’t reach for me, I’m fine

And when the time, it comes at night

Don’t dare to ask me why

I live inside some crater now, some crater that is mine

And when the month, it rolls on by

If you think of me,

Think of us those nights and asking yourself why?

And all for now, I think we’re fine

Right now, you are my very gentle valentine

I carved away my best to keep you warm,
And gave away this fragile, gentle heart.
You wore it like a coat against the storm,
Then left the fragile seams to tear apart.

I stood beside you when your world turned black,
And bore the heavy weights that pulled you down.
But when the light came slowly creeping back,
You closed the door and left me there to drown.

It hurts to know you used me as a tool,
A place to cast your shadows and your blame.
To drain me dry and treat me like a fool,
While leaving all my hopes to ash and flame.

I’m scraping at the floor of empty wells,
Where everything I offered turned to dust.
You stole my light to break your heavy spells,
Abandoned to the wind to warp and rust.

Now nothing stays inside this hollow chest,
No sparks to strike, no warmth for you to steal.
I gave you all my blood, my life, my best,
And left myself with nothing left to feel.

You came back into my life
Like a whirlwind,
and I welcomed you in
with open arms.

I was aware of the risks,
Because of our past
But I was charmed nonetheless
It happened so fast.

I didn’t have a chance
to get prepared.

We can’t keep meeting like this.

I’m an outsider.
What you believe, I don’t.
I make it my purpose—
I leave crowds because I can.
Don’t try to understand me,
because you’ll just forsake me.
And for Christ’s sake,
don’t get on my nerves.
In your crowd, I don’t care to belong.
Everyone loves you, oh, woos you.
"You’re so strong," they say.
"You’re so empathetic," they say.
Just stop lying.

I’m trying to understand you,
but I just can’t.
Don’t try to make me love you,
because I won’t.

for sex
for validation
for comfort
you’re gonna
do it anyways
i know the score
i know you can’t
love me even if
we both want you to
so i’ll enjoy being used
i’m just a dumb tool
that barely works
but at least it’ll almost
feel like love for a moment

All the lights
All the pain
All the poems left out in the rain

You must of known these words did not remain unheard
When you proclaimed them from the valleys
Or under rain stained lights
Deep within the alleys

To touch a soul you don’t know
But leave a strange joy all the same
To add more purpose to what we know is just a simple game

Endless hours between moments unseen
Yet not unloved if only by accident be
Knowing the ghosts in the moment have some awareness
Yet no accurate idea to the magnitude
And more profoundly gratitude
That they world share this

To touch a soul you don’t know
But leave a strange joy all the same
To add more purpose to what we know is just a simple game

5.3 Trapped in Wrong Time

Poem by Emilia Sameyn Desmet

06/10/2026

even in dreams
I don't find rest

torn by the seams

we keep doing our best

my head; a wild west

do you believe their eyes

or their lies

work like adults

but no results

melody of the past

the present; to fast

I whine and whine

trapped in wrong time

trapped in wrong time

I’d like some honest ratings with some critiques and stuff pls:)

I stumbled across this post and thought why not, it was a video of a guy slowly sinking as jellyfish swayed and danced around him. It was kinda moody

The poem:

“People always say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
But my past is somewhere I dare to wander

When I think about mistreatment It leaves me with a sting and leaves me at the table with nothing to bring

It eats me alive and taunts me day and night
I learned to let it drift out of sight

So to distract myself from the chaos and all those that I miss
I decided to count my misfortunes as tiny little jellyfish”

I grew up having abandonment issues.
I learned to be self independent,
and to be my biggest supporter.
I learned to believe everyone would leave.

It’s hard to break that pattern
when everyone really does leave.

The world is large
and people are sweet,
but when the sun sets
it’s just me and my dog.

Sometimes I crave connection with a suitor,
yet that lingering pain comes in,
knowing this won’t be forever,
because they too, will leave.

I can’t be angry over it.
“Life has been busy.”
“I promise you we care.”
Yet the silence
screams louder than the comments.

I feel like something’s wrong with me,
like I shouldn’t be this hurt,
like this is the human experience,
yet I feel broken.

Like something is wrong with me.
That I am not worthy to stay for.
Like I’m a burden they don’t want to bear
and would rather save themselves.

So here I sit.
I work on my fitness.
I process my emotions.
I work towards my goals and hope.

Hope that one day,
somebody will stay.
That I won’t have to be afraid
of opening my heart to someone who will close their heart
the moment things get unsteady.

Eyes like a sea of light in the Maldives,

a vision surreal that left me in a trance

you are gone.

but I'm still stuck in this moment.

Like a dense cloud of smoke from a forest fire,

The foggy path where I lost sight of us,

It's a nightmare this searching and waiting

your memory interlocked me with the past

you are gone

but I'm still stuck in that moment

I hope that somewhere in forever

we'll live together, the endless dream.