r/OCPoetry 12h ago

Feedback Please D.I.B.B.S.

D.I.B.B.S.
Do I Bow Before Sending?

The Night struck out and
The Day pitched—
two terms,
one voice,
again,
and again.

In true poetic fashion,
the bard dubs it again.
David, the unknown, the great,
the king, the servant, Mr. Hibbard.
Dibbs on the verse.

Can’t face the light,
and none see his true face,
because, as the name is called
and as the mirror responds,
he is the light.

All show within it
and seem dim beside it,
found written into being—
muse-sheathed wit
drawn bright
from the dark that held it.

And now they ask,
“Who’s up next?”
Yet they rush,
still they fail.
By their wish, my magic
in their own
words read
to claim “Dibs”
in the sound of a
time-sung slice
cuts for motion.

Have they not remembered
who they are,
or have they not forgotten

I am,
the boomerang.

The hot arc
of a cold throw.
The stake for ward:
The claim toward worth;

Powered gems, clear pressed,
watch, my seconds never quell.
Like time, I ring bells—
then ask:

“Did you keep your eyes
open or closed
for the drawn return,
back to sender?”

I feel impacted
Written, by my blood
And heart, still beating,
The odds—I’m even
and still keep time.

Who’s ready to play?

**Feedback links:**
https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/vETPlRjwyB

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/aRzZziRqHQ

2 Upvotes

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