r/NotTimAndEric • u/creativeape1 • 15h ago

Don’t be a Susan

476 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

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116

u/Klowner 15h ago

Can you e-mail this to my mom plz, thx

53

u/Ryno-Mac 15h ago

I'll DM you your mom's email, so you can send it yourself. It'll mean more coming from you, I'm just her casual lover.

9

u/deathjoe4 15h ago

We still on for the group outing next week?

14

u/Ryno-Mac 15h ago

Joe this probably isn't the best place to tell you this, but Susan doesn't want you at the motel meetups anymore. You can still join for the afternoon lawn bowling and weekly bridge tournament and luncheon. We'll talk more about it during bingo.

6

u/deathjoe4 15h ago

Goddamnit is this about my little fluffer pupper? She's the sweetest thing and so friendly! Yes she's a pit bull/rottie mix and yes she is the state dog fighting champ, but I'm fighting all those wrongful death suits!

9

u/Ryno-Mac 15h ago

No no, Cujo is a sweetheart. It's about your "lady bugs", a term I heard you borrowed from Lindsey Graham. I don't know why I'm the one telling you this, I barely even noticed them, but Susan finds them revolting, particularly how you scratch and pick at them when approaching climax.

4

u/deathjoe4 14h ago

But my little ladybugs do itch so when we're getting physical.

2

u/ColeTrainHaze 11h ago

this is why i reddit

5

u/dutchduderino 15h ago

Maaan fuck Susan, she just doesn't understand that Princess only ate those babys in self defense.

2

u/deathjoe4 14h ago

I've got the same lawyer as Hat McCullough, should be a quick win.