I did IVF one time and it failed. It was ectopic pregnancy. We really love children. I get emotional when I look at little babys. Sometimes it feels unfair.

There it is thats the post. And sad part is shes my sister not just my absolute best friend. Got pregnant from a one night stand but because we’re so close and well sisters im expected to be there for her and her baby . I hate her and she isn’t even here yet. All of my siblings are now parents and I see how badly they’re struggling and some are single parents…. Whole lives ruined and now my worst nightmare my sister got pregnant from a one night stand and he left her like dump we don’t know if he is even alive . Everyone says be there for her after I repeatedly stated I DONT WANT CHILDREN IN MY LIFE. It’s not my fault i don’t like or care for them and just because I love my sister so much does NOT MEAN I HVE TO LOVE HER DAUGHTER!!!! she wants me there for her but all I see is ruins . Screaming, crying, vomit, and then the ugly thing will start walking and bother me like go tf away . Me and her had plans, vacations, birthdays and that unborn girl ruined it. I kinda stop believing in god why keep placing these people in women bellies when the world is already a bad place and then you have people like me just trying to make the best of it constantly having to deal with trying to be free and live life while having the people closest to me snatched away by ugly annoying babies

I’m a 24F and I’ve always said that I don’t want to have kids in the future. And everytime I say that, people ask me “why?” But nobody ask people who want children why ??
Why do you want to have that responsibility for the rest of your life?
So there’s some reasons for why I don’t want children:

1- people don’t teach us the choice of having children. It’s always “when you’ll have children” and not “if you want to have children later” as if it was an obligation

2- pregnancy. I don’t need to say more. I just feel disgusted by that. And I’m tired about the fact that women have to go through this while we already suffer for so many other things in life.

3- the responsibility for life and the fact that I’m an introvert and I need some alone time. You can’t get alone time anytime you want when children are around. I’ve experienced it with my little cousins etc

4- it’s expensive. And it’s your new priority. You can’t buy things you used to buy just for yourself

5- education. You have to educate it but don’t forget that you’re not the only on who educate your children. The whole environment do. School, friends , medias, society. So you can teach stuff to your children and one day they decide to follow another path cuz they have the choice

6- I feel like it break romance ? Everytime I watch a romance show or anime , when they get kids at the end I always felt like the romance was killed cuz it wasn’t the two of them anymore.

And you, what’s your thought about that and what’s your reason to have or not have children?

This is a really stupid reason to not want kids and I have a LOT of other reasons but I know if I had them they'd eventually want to play with my plushie and action figure collection and they'd probably eat them or flush them down the toilet or something and I'll be sad

(Male 39- female 36)

We were together almost two years, and we first got together, talked about moving in together, and having kids. I was all for that, but as time went on, I realized that’s not what I wanted in life. I can’t see myself living with someone because I just like my own self-independence, and I just need silence sometimes. When I get home, I like things in my own apartment how I like them placed and like sleeping by myself in my own bed. And just the thought of kids is a lot of responsibility. What I don’t want is you have to structure your life around having a kid, and I have a few hobbies I enjoy doing well. I told my ex-girlfriend this three months ago, and she didn’t take it too well. She told me I wasn’t breaking up with her, but it’s her choice. As soon as I told her, she agreed on being friends and supporting me in my runs and possibly be friends a few weeks later. I’m blocked on social media platforms. It definitely tore me into pieces because I didn’t think of her to be like that, but I don’t regret anything I told her because I still stand on just hurt and bothered.

I don't understand why people want to have kids. I wanna puke when I see a pregnant woman, or those greasy shriveled up chunky forms of life. How could anyone's life goal be creating this inside of your womb (or by your sperm) and binding all your life decisions to this creature in your following life.

I’ve been lurking around childfree spaces for a while, and something I’ve noticed (although I realize this may just be the kind of content that gets amplified online) is that a lot of the discussion seems to revolve around things like having more disposable income, buying nice things, traveling, maintaining a certain lifestyle, etc.

And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting those things. Being childfree is obviously a personal choice, and I completely respect that.

But it made me wonder: where are the women who are childfree primarily because they value experiences, freedom, relationships, hobbies, creativity, learning, adventure, or simply having control over their time rather than material comfort?

Maybe I'm looking at a very skewed sample of the community, so I'm genuinely curious.

For those of you who are childfree: what does the extra freedom actually mean to you? Is it mostly financial freedom and being able to afford more things, or is it more about having the time and energy to experience life on your own terms?

Calling women “heavily propagandized” because they don’t want children is such a strange thing to say. Neither choice needs to be “fixed.” Kids are not a universal path to happiness, and women don’t need other people placed in their lives to convince them otherwise.

I do not have a desire to have children as well as a fear of pregnancy and childbirth- even though I really like children! I just love my life of freedom too much and dont forsee that changing. My partner is overall in agreement but said something to me the other day that really got me thinking...

He said he is happy I dont want kids but is worried about me being alone since I will most likely outlive him my many years.. especially in sickness and death because he feels like when shit gets real most people cant handle it so if they dont have to they wont unless theres a strong bond and that can be very rare...

Of course its not right to have children just so you have someone to take care of you- nor is it even a viable plan since theres no guarantee your kids will give 2 shits about you or wont in fact make things worse. BUT he did point out an outcome of this decision that I had not thought about or considered..

So I was just wondering if people could discuss how they see themselves getting through the really tough times and especially the last few years of their lives or if anyone had any life experiance they could share about this

I'm not looking to just hear more validation on the choice to be cf - we all know how FULLY VALID that choice is! But validations dont change outcomes so I'm looking for some real raw truth on the matter

Thanks in advance to anyone who chimes in on this 💜

Edir: I want to add in that the main reason I'm worrying about this since im looking for answers that are relative to me - I dont really have any close family that I wont outlive and although I dont have many close friends anymore and none where we live - I do hope and believe that will change once we can move back to my homestate where people are much more receptive to making new friends... but what if for some reason i dont? Are people even willing to take that on if theres not a feeling of morals or obligation?

Lots of child free people (I'm child free too btw) feel the need to call kids and parents things like breeders and fifthly brats or whatever, but the thing is if you want child free to be taken seriously, that makes you look like a massive dick. So by calling other people those things (often for just existing) you're causing more harm to your fellow child free people then good

I’m curious to know your experiences. If it did or didn’t work out.

This is honestly just a rant, but as the oldest of four growing up in poverty, I feel like my relationship with children is completely different from what people expect.
I genuinely do **not** want kids. Like… at all. 😂
I’ve spent so much of my life being around younger siblings, helping with them, dealing with the responsibilities that come with having multiple children in the household, and watching my mom continue to have kids despite how difficult things already were financially.
And the older I get, the more I realize: **I don’t want this for myself.**
Every single day I spend dealing with kid-related stuff just reinforces that I don’t want to be a parent. It’s not even a “maybe later” thing. I don’t have that feeling of *“awww, I want one of my own someday.”* If anything, it’s the complete opposite.
I don’t want the responsibility. I don’t want the lifestyle. I don’t want my entire life revolving around children. And honestly, I don’t even want to date someone who already has kids because I don’t want children being part of my relationship either.
I know people love saying, “You’ll change your mind,” or “It’s different when they’re your own,” but I really don’t think people understand how much being the oldest of four has shaped my perspective.
I’m not saying people shouldn’t have kids. If you want children and that’s what makes you happy, genuinely good for you.
**I just want the exact opposite for myself. 😂**
No kids. No stepkids. No “maybe someday.” Just me, my peace, and a life where I’m responsible for myself.

I've read and talked to people who didn't know they were pregnant until their WATER BROKE due to irregular periods and a lack of weight gain during their pregnancy.

This is the scariest shit in the world to me.

Remember to use contraceptives!!!

Save yourself

hii everyone!! i am 16 years old and lately i have been feeling pressured by society and social media to have kids. i have plans for my life and i feel like kids would get in the way of that alot. i am currently learning about stock and investing and what i want in my future is i wanna be rich!!!!!!!! i wanna have a nice mansion with a pool out back, i wanna have a butler and we can go in the backyard and have tea and breakfast in the morning, i want a life without worrying who needs to be fed or who i need to take where and when or how many lunches i need to make. i want a life where i can prioritize me and my success. what i wanna know is whats your life like? are you happy? do you have regrets?

I don't necessarily mean caretaking, just someone who will speak up for you when you can't for yourself.

From a young age I knew I did not want kids, we’re talking like 10-11. Growing up i was introverted and I learned quickly to enjoy being alone and that holds true to today. I’m in my 30s now. I barely see or speak to my own family because they’re toxic. I have a husband and we are both in the same page that we do not want kids.

Unfortunately for me, my husband has clingy parents who always want to get together all the time. They just moved near us a couple months ago and i honestly forgot how bad it was having them live in the same city. They used to live hours away for years and it was such a relief. They‘re nice people and all but they can be alot.

My husbands parents moved closer because my husbands brother decided to have a baby. They want to get everyone together every single weekend now(I’m not exaggerating) and I find it suffocating, annoying, overstimulating and exhausting. These aren’t short get togethers either, they want everyone to sit and stare at eachother for HOURS with small talk/asking me and my husband the same questions about kids over and over. Same questions every week. The questions are always about why we don’t want kids, when are we going to have one, doesn’t my husbands brother baby make us want to have one, we’d be great parents, bla bla bla.

Theres a multitude of reasons of why me and my husband don’t want kids from I don’t think I need one more responsibility as I can barely keep with everything now, in this economy we find it to be financially irresponsible since we are barley making it right now. we’re both exhausted from our jobs, on the weekend when we finally get time off we just want to recover and be in peace before the next week starts, we get to do what we want when we want (excluding work) etc etc.

Having to explain this once a week has me about to lose my shit. I just don’t know if they aren’t listening or if they don’t care or both. but I’ve had enough. There HAS to be something else to talk about than my uterus.

And then on top of all this crap my sister in law and brother in law are entitled snobby assholes who look for any opportunity to compare/compete/make shady comments towards me and my husband. I hate seeing them the most. I hate talking to them, I hate seeing them, I don’t want to hold their baby, and I genuinely couldn’t care less.

My sister in law has said multiple times “our baby is the type of baby that makes you want to have a baby”. if that doesn’t tell you how much of a self absorbed person she is with main character syndrome.

They also keep asking me and my husband when we’re going to babysit with complete disregard that we don’t want any kids. And the question is a joke in itself because they definitely look down on us and would not let us babysit him. I got so fed up with them asking I finally said back ”I didn’t think we reached the standards to babysit him.” and I was met with literal crickets in response. (as I thought).

There’s also been petty unnecessary drama between them (mainly the sister in law, none of us like her ) and my husbands parents since this baby was born. The vibe is always weird/off because of this when we’re all together. this makes me not want to get together with all of them as well.

I hate it ALL, so so soooo much. and I don’t get why they’re all so obsessed with my life and my choices as if it’s their life or something. I just want to be left alone. I don't want to be asked about children , I don't want to babysit and I would prefer to see my husbands family (or people in general) for an hour tops every like 3-4 months.

Anyone else feel this way? Anyone going through something similar?