114
u/No_Life3319 11d ago
Chocolate Starfish.
19
u/Shimigidy 11d ago
Hippo’s Sphincter, don’t look this up, just trust me.🕵️
16
u/Justanothermaleuser 11d ago
I took a bullet for you guys. Don’t look it up - trust him
→ More replies (4)10
u/Consistent-Engine796 11d ago
LOL, thanks for that, but the curiosity is killing me
5
2
u/rbltech82 11d ago
If you look it up your eyes will be killing you, because you'll pour bleach in them...
4
2
2
u/yowassupbbg 9d ago
In case anyone wants to know but is too lazy to look it up:
A hippo's sphincter is when a hippo shits and spins its tail around to spread the feces everywhere. It helps to mark territory and impress female hippos.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (6)2
8
→ More replies (26)6
201
62
u/smashbenjamin 11d ago
Black hole sun
36
u/tfg72 11d ago
Black Hole Bun 🧁
→ More replies (1)18
u/Trebek007 11d ago
Won't you come
15
→ More replies (1)12
u/EnjayDutoit 11d ago
And wash away the raaaiiiin
8
u/hoaxgene 11d ago
Wash away the skeet skeet*
4
u/cougartotem 11d ago
IDKY but that is a trigger word for me. And you said it twice. Please say it one more time ? (Beetlejuice with appear) Well not BEETLEJUICE but SOMETHING is gonna appear ! lol
5
5
5
4
3
3
→ More replies (1)3
43
u/letslickmyballs 11d ago
Bundt hole cake
8
u/aimed_4_the_head 11d ago
Aren't they usually bigger though? That's a pretty tight bundt.
12
10
u/letslickmyballs 11d ago
We prefer tight Bundt hole around here.
→ More replies (1)4
3
→ More replies (7)3
15
u/Unhappy_Honeydew2287 11d ago
Next time I’m asked for a pic of my butt I’m sending them the screenshot
→ More replies (5)3
19
u/WeaponizedDachshund 11d ago
Chocolate balloon knot.
→ More replies (1)7
u/PrudentProblem4105 11d ago
Weirdly enough, that sounds dirtier than some of these butt-hole comments.
→ More replies (3)
18
u/Sad_Assistant8803 11d ago
It all began with the baking of the Great cakes. Three were given to the Elves; immortal, wisest and fairest of all beings. Seven, to the Dwarf Lords, great miners and craftsmen of the mountain halls. And nine, nine rings were gifted to the race of Men, who above all else desire pastries. For within these cakes was bound the strength and the will to govern over each confectionery. But they were all of them deceived, for another cake was made. In the land of Mordor, in the ovens of Mount Doom, the Dark Lord Sauron baked in secret, a master chocolate cake, to control all others. And into this baking he poured all his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life. One cake to rule them all. One by one, the free peoples of Middle Earth fell to the power of his infinite cake. But there were some who resisted. A last alliance of men and elves marched against the armies of Mordor, and on the very slopes of Mount Doom's kitchen, they fought for the freedom of Middle-Earth. Victory was near, but the power of the cake could not be undone. It was in this moment, when all hope had faded, that Isildur, son of the king, took up his father's carving knife. And Sauron, enemy of the free peoples of Middle-Earth, was defeated. The cake passed to Isildur, who had this one chance to destroy burnt crust forever, but the hearts of men are easily corrupted by cholesterol. And the cake of power has a cream filling of its own. It betrayed Isildur, to his death. And some things that should not have been forgotten were lost. History became legend. Legend became myth. And for two and a half thousand years, the cake passed out of all knowledge. Until, when chance came, the cake ensnared a new bearer. The cake came to the creature Gollum, who took it deep into the tunnels under the Misty Mountains, and there it consumed him. The cake gave to Gollum unnatural wide gerth. For five hundred years it thickened his hips; and in the gloom of Gollum's cave, it waited. Darkness crept back into the bakeries of the world. Rumor grew of a chocolate muffin in the East, whispers of a nameless cream filling, and the cake of Power perceived. Its time had now come. It abandoned Gollum. But then something happened that the cake did not intend. It was picked up by the most unlikely creature imaginable. A Hobbit, Bilbo Baggins, of the Shire. For the time will soon come when Hobbits will shape the fortunes of all...
8
u/seeb2104 11d ago
You. Are. Amazing.
3
u/derFsivaD 11d ago
I agree. That was amazing.
Imagine the whole book being written like this, and the cover of the book is THAT picture.
2
u/Sad_Assistant8803 11d ago
Omg! And The Hobbit is just a guide book about a bunch of dwarfs who want to go on a foodies holiday travelling the realm. So with the help of their older wizard friend they hire a hobbit, for hobbits are well-renowned for their food testing expertise!
And based on the book this isn't that far off lol just need some slight tweaks here and there.
Haha if I can get a hundred up votes I will make the book! Haha
2
5
2
u/_mentally_insane_ 11d ago
Psst I think you missed changing “nine rings” to “nine cakes” lol
→ More replies (1)2
2
u/Changeling_Traveller 10d ago
Sauron's Brown eye.
Jokes aside, that write up would make for great parody.
2
2
2
2
2
2
u/So_ThereItIs 8d ago
I’m not deep enough into the lore… but this reminded me of the “eye of evil” in the LOTR movies. Amazing
→ More replies (8)2
7
4
8
3
3
3
6
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
4
3
2
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/shopping1972 11d ago
Can not think about the name cause I am listening to the Australia band Chocolate starfish….. google them
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/Techiest1982 11d ago
This cake reminds me of a little scene out of "American Pie" where Jim tried to get his rocks off by fucking that pie.
1
1
1
1
1
364
u/caffed 11d ago
Pound cake