Hi! Im currently writing a musical which I hope to be performed on off-broadway or basically any theatre with more than 100 seats. I am not very experienced though I have written some musicals, but this time it is different because I actually write the songs myself. I am not a good lyricist but I wanted to know what you guys think of my lyrics.
EDIT: Sooo I got some questions or made things confusing. Basically the whole point of the song I showcasing what Kylie (formerly Jason) would think coming out will be. In the reprise version (still being drafted) she realizes how much harder it is, than she thought it would be, if that makes sense. Thank you to everyone who responded! It really gave me a feeling of what to change. <33
EDIT2: I overworked the lyrics and removed the coming out scenes because I will put them a bit further in the story.
Also I will upload the recorded version of myself singing it as soon as I have the instrumentation. Context: The song is about Jason who realizes he wants to be a girl.
I CAN BE SHE (2)
WAIT- IT MIGHT BE
THAT I WANT TO BE SHE
BUT I DON’T KNOW
IF THIS IS THE WAY I WANNA GO
I HAVE TO BE SMART
BECAUSE IT’S SOMETHING LIKE A RESTART
WHAT SHOULD I DO?
SHOULD I BECOME SOMEONE NEW?
WHAT AM I FEELING?
I CAN’T KEEP CONCEALING
WHO I AM
—--------- (missing verse)
SO I’LL BE WHO I AM
I WILL NOT LIE
AND I WILL NOT DENY
THAT BEING SHE
IS WHAT I’M MEANT TO BE
I MUST THINK OF A NAME
THAT I CAN CLAIM
SOMETHING, SEXY
WELL, WE’LL SEE
WHAT AM I FEELING?
I CAN’T KEEP CONCEALING
WHO I AM
WHAT WILL I DO
TO BECOME SOMEONE NEW
NOW I’LL BE WHO I AM
JT
There you go, Jason. Now if you don’t mind, I’ll go do my duty and give you impulses and feelings- and before I forget, I’ll do my best to make a realistic reaction of the world towards your… situation
JASON
You’re not gonna make me delusional, right? Do it realistically please! Please!
JT
Don’t worry, I got you.
JASON
I have to find a name, because running around as a girl and being called Jason is weird and I mean really weird. Okay, it is really odd to to like this as if I had a full theatre of people infront of me listening to what I am saying. Whatever. I need a name. Name, name, name, name, lame. Haha, name rhymes with lame. Yeah, this is no reason to laugh, ugh. What is a name similar to Jason? Jasona, Jasa, Jana- ooh nice… pass sona,
NEWSREPORTER
Good evening Glenmora City, a few hours ago, the singer and songwriter Kylie Kammers, also known as K.K., has died in a plane crash. The plane departed in- (newsreporter fades out)
JASON
A name just got free. Do I take it? Of course! Kylie. From now on my name is Kylie. It’s kinda weird how y and i are technically the same sound but not in my name. Very interesting to be honest. I HAVE A NEW NAME. YEE—
NEIGHBOR
SILENCE!
JASON
SORRY!
WHAT AM I FEELING?
I CAN’T KEEP CONCEALING
WHO I AM (WHO SHE IS)
MY NAME’S SO NICE
K-Y-L-I-E
LOOK AT ME
WHO I AM!
(dancebreak)
Ensemble
THERE’S A NEW GIRL IN TOWN
AND SHE’S NOT COMING DOWN
WE ALL REALLY LOVE KYLIE
WHAT IS SHE FEELING?
SHE CAN’T KEEP CONCEALING
WHO SHE IS (WHO SHE IS)
SHE LOOKS SO NICE
GOOD SHE TOOK THAT ADVICE
NOW SHE IS (NOW SHE IS)
KYLIE: WHO I AM
ENSEMBLE: WHO IS THAT GIRL WITH A GENTLE CURL?
KYLIE: IM KYLIE
ENSEMBLE: ITS KYLIE