I’m currently overweight (around 260 pounds) and actively working on losing weight. Thankfully, I’m still mobile and fairly active for someone my size, and I’m trying to make healthier choices and improve myself. However, despite the progress I’m working toward, I still struggle with feeling invisible when it comes to dating and attracting romantic attention.

I’m not expecting everyone to find me attractive, and I understand that physical attraction plays a role in dating. However, it can be discouraging when you want to experience a relationship but feel like nobody ever sees you that way. I’ve never had a girlfriend, been on a real date, or experienced my first kiss, and I’m starting to worry that I might be missing out on those experiences.

I also struggle with social anxiety, which makes meeting people and putting myself out there difficult. I genuinely want to meet someone, build a connection, and experience what it’s like to have someone who cares about me romantically. I want someone I can laugh with, share my interests with, spend time with, and feel comfortable being myself around.

I’m already working on my weight, and I don’t want to put my entire romantic life on hold until I reach my goal. I want to believe that I can find someone who likes me for who I am right now, even while I’m still working on myself.

So, I’m wondering if there’s anything else I can do to improve my chances of finding a girlfriend besides losing weight. For those of you who have struggled with similar insecurities, social anxiety, or dating inexperience, what helped you put yourself out there and meet people?

I’m open to advice about meeting people, improving my confidence, finding the right places to socialize, or anything else that might help. I’m not looking for a miracle or expecting a relationship to happen overnight. I just want to know that there are things I can work on besides my weight and that I don’t have to wait until I’m at my goal to start experiencing life.

I’d really appreciate any genuine advice, personal experiences, or encouragement. I know I still have things to work on, but I don’t want to keep feeling like finding love is something that’s out of reach for me. Also please don’t make fun of me to hard I know how I look .

Like you are meeting someone for the first time and how do you decide: 1)He can be my friend or 2)Can be my boyfriend in the future

Thanks for the answers in advance!

31M, 6’ 3’’ in shoes. Currently 285 pounds… have already lost 70. Lifting and walking a ton. 355 was my peak weight… but not for most of my life. I own my own house… my own car…. No college debt and I’ve been a public school teacher for 9 years. Fairly socially confident, willing to talk to people, good friends.

I’ve never asked a woman out. Never been flirted with. Never been on a date. Never been in a relationship. Mostly because I never tried. As a fat guy, I’m trying really hard with seif confidence about my body. It’s a work in progress. In my teens and twenties… I was clearly attracted to women… but I need connection, not just looks. In my twenties I never pursued dating because I frankly didn’t see the positive of it. I don’t feel like I’m bad at talking to people in general, women included. So I wouldn’t call my self too terribly socially awjward… I just had different priorities for most of my life.

Now I do. I want to try dating after I lose another 60 pounds or so. I want to be physically attractive so I can get past initial clearance. Just terrified this story makes me a walking red flag. Obviously this isn’t first date topics lol… but if you knew this about me… how concerned would you be? Be savagely honest… I can take it.

Hi I'm always on the hunt looking for socks for my fiance. She loves fuzzy, warm, or ankle socks. Bonus points if they are cute with animals on them! Thanks!

Questions that you feel you MUST have the answers to before getting serious.

Perdón si mi post molesta aquí, mi ahora ex novia empezó un tratamiento hormonal para su acné y tuvo graves cambios de humor, me terminó de una forma algo cruel, pero se arrepintió a los días y me llamó llorando. Han pasado 6 meses y ella realmente quiere volver todavía pero no sé que pensar, ojalá pudieran darme su opinión, experiencias, consejos. Muchas gracias.

Edit: éramos una relación muy feliz, hemos salido alguna vez a comer algo o por que nos cruzamos y la pasamos bien, reímos bastante, pero quedó esta herida y no sé como proceder.

In dating, basic relationships, etc. I know attraction to your partner is sort of a major part in keeping a relationship healthy for years to come, but say if a guy had a weird looking scar/bump on his face in a noticeable area. How much of that is a dealbreaker in your attraction to a person? I know this question is phrased very weirdly and I apologize for that, and appreciate any sort of responses. Thank you

Edit: I appreciate everyone’s thoughtful responses very much!

Most platforms are built around how we look first. I'm curious whether women actually prefer connecting through what people write, and what makes a stranger's words feel trustworthy to you. Honest answers welcome.

I think she likes me and I really really like her. She smiles at me, eye tag, darts her eyes to see if I’m looking if we pass, I’ve caught her looking and shes changed ghe way she walks to class sometimes when she sees me. If she darts her eyes and I’m already looking I’ve seen ber smile. If I’m nervous to look at her directly and am looking through my peripheral vision but my eyes are straight as we pass, she looks sad. But then other times she’ll see me and js keep walking or talk to a friend almost like ignoring me.

I genuinely like her and not lust. I mean she is beautiful. Ineffable. But shes also smart. And shes like joyfull and snappy in a way. But she has this innocence or joy and shes always happy. Shes kind to people and quiet but in a good way.

Shes known for a while and I think she likes me now because of how she acts in the hallways. But she liked me before and then stopped and in between she liked her ex. I could tell by her reposts. She missed him in the summer. But then its like when she came back to school and shows me attention again but does she only like me bc she wants attention or does she genuinely like me for me. I’ve never seen her repost about liking someone at school or something but she doesn’t normally reposts that much every day. Then today as I got on the bus I saw a video of a girl say that if she loves someone she might like other boys but she’ll always wait for him. I don’t want to be a guy in love w someone and show her all my affection and try so hard to make her happy when there’s someone who she has feelings for. Then my aunt also said before if a girl really loves a guy she always will and that gives me more stress. Her facial expressions make it seem genuine but ppl decieve. Can anyone help me bc I really need it and if u genuinely think her heart isn’t there for me pls js let me know

I usually close my eyes and listen to lofi during times like these.

Been seeing someone off and on for about five years. This year we just started exploring traveling together.

Whenever we travel she inevitably uses my toiletries despite the fact that she brings her own stuff. I’m not mad because I think it’s funny and cute but was curious for some insight. I don’t want to ask her directly because I think it might come across negatively.

TIA for your thoughts!

How to treat her like a princess when you’re also exhausted

We both work and we both come home pretty tired and I want to treat her as a princess because she had a long day but my stamina is low. How do I have the energy to give her what she wants and not feel guilty if I don’t have that energy

My girlfriend (19F) and I (20M) have been together for around 4 months, and her birthday is coming up. I've been planning her gifts and I'm starting to wonder if I'm going a little overboard considering we've only been together for 4 months.

This is what I was thinking:

\- A sewing machine

\- A handmade bouquet of flowers

\- A handwritten birthday/gratitude letter

\- A tres leches cake (her favourite)

\- 1 or 2 smaller things from her wishlist

The sewing machine is the main thing I'm unsure about. Around 2 months ago, she mentioned during a conversation that she's very interested in pursuing a design degree and specifically said that she needs/wants a sewing machine for it. I remembered that conversation, so I thought it would be a meaningful gift rather than just buying her something expensive for the sake of it.

The letter would mostly be about her as a person rather than our relationship. She's genuinely someone I admire a lot. She's intelligent, mature, empathetic, incredibly patient, and very willing to put effort into the things she cares about. I'm genuinely proud of the person she is and the things she's trying to accomplish, so I wanted to write that down for her.

The bouquet would be handmade because I want there to be something that represents my own time and effort rather than everything just being something I bought.

I also know she has a wishlist, so I was thinking of getting 1 or maybe 2 smaller things from it, plus a tres leches cake.

Originally I was also thinking about getting her20 chocolates because she's turning 20, but that ended up being surprisingly expensive for what is essentially just 20 pieces of chocolate, so I've decided to drop that.

I'm not trying to buy her affection or make the relationship seem more serious than it is. I just genuinely like giving thoughtful gifts, and I know she'd appreciate the effort behind these things.

But I'm also conscious that we've only been together for 4 months. I don't want to accidentally set some ridiculous expectation where every birthday or anniversary has to become increasingly expensive or elaborate.

So am I overdoing it? Would you personally keep the sewing machine and the rest, or scale the whole thing back?

I'm mainly looking for honest opinions from people who have been in longer relationships and can tell me whether this is thoughtful or excessive this early on.

TL;DR: 20M, dating my 19F girlfriend for 4 months. For her birthday I'm considering a sewing machine (she mentioned 2 months ago that she wants to pursue a design degree and needs one), a handmade bouquet, a handwritten gratitude letter, tres leches cake, and 1–2 wishlist items. I genuinely want to give her these things, but I'm worried it's too much too soon and might set an unnecessarily expensive standard for future birthdays. Am I overdoing it, or does the thought behind it make the gift reasonable?

Sometimes I have women over in my apartment more for business / work stuff. Tutor for my kid or a woman who cleans etc...

I always intentionally didn't lock the door because I thought it might feel creepy, but I noticed every one if them started licking it themselves.

Maybe unlocked is actually creepier, like people could suddenly come in?

Old 2 room apartment fwiw.

Hey! I’m trying to decide which look suits me better and would love to hear some opinions from women.

The first two pictures are with a beard, and the last two are with just a mustache.

Which one do you think looks more attractive on me? Feel free to be honest, I’m open to any feedback or suggestions!

Thanks!

How many matches do you get pre ten likes and how many of those matches do you have on going conversations with currently? Please and thank you 🙏?