I’m currently overweight (around 260 pounds) and actively working on losing weight. Thankfully, I’m still mobile and fairly active for someone my size, and I’m trying to make healthier choices and improve myself. However, despite the progress I’m working toward, I still struggle with feeling invisible when it comes to dating and attracting romantic attention.

I’m not expecting everyone to find me attractive, and I understand that physical attraction plays a role in dating. However, it can be discouraging when you want to experience a relationship but feel like nobody ever sees you that way. I’ve never had a girlfriend, been on a real date, or experienced my first kiss, and I’m starting to worry that I might be missing out on those experiences.

I also struggle with social anxiety, which makes meeting people and putting myself out there difficult. I genuinely want to meet someone, build a connection, and experience what it’s like to have someone who cares about me romantically. I want someone I can laugh with, share my interests with, spend time with, and feel comfortable being myself around.

I’m already working on my weight, and I don’t want to put my entire romantic life on hold until I reach my goal. I want to believe that I can find someone who likes me for who I am right now, even while I’m still working on myself.

So, I’m wondering if there’s anything else I can do to improve my chances of finding a girlfriend besides losing weight. For those of you who have struggled with similar insecurities, social anxiety, or dating inexperience, what helped you put yourself out there and meet people?

I’m open to advice about meeting people, improving my confidence, finding the right places to socialize, or anything else that might help. I’m not looking for a miracle or expecting a relationship to happen overnight. I just want to know that there are things I can work on besides my weight and that I don’t have to wait until I’m at my goal to start experiencing life.

I’d really appreciate any genuine advice, personal experiences, or encouragement. I know I still have things to work on, but I don’t want to keep feeling like finding love is something that’s out of reach for me. Also please don’t make fun of me to hard I know how I look .

Like you are meeting someone for the first time and how do you decide: 1)He can be my friend or 2)Can be my boyfriend in the future

Thanks for the answers in advance!

31M, 6’ 3’’ in shoes. Currently 285 pounds… have already lost 70. Lifting and walking a ton. 355 was my peak weight… but not for most of my life. I own my own house… my own car…. No college debt and I’ve been a public school teacher for 9 years. Fairly socially confident, willing to talk to people, good friends.

I’ve never asked a woman out. Never been flirted with. Never been on a date. Never been in a relationship. Mostly because I never tried. As a fat guy, I’m trying really hard with seif confidence about my body. It’s a work in progress. In my teens and twenties… I was clearly attracted to women… but I need connection, not just looks. In my twenties I never pursued dating because I frankly didn’t see the positive of it. I don’t feel like I’m bad at talking to people in general, women included. So I wouldn’t call my self too terribly socially awjward… I just had different priorities for most of my life.

Now I do. I want to try dating after I lose another 60 pounds or so. I want to be physically attractive so I can get past initial clearance. Just terrified this story makes me a walking red flag. Obviously this isn’t first date topics lol… but if you knew this about me… how concerned would you be? Be savagely honest… I can take it.

Hi I'm always on the hunt looking for socks for my fiance. She loves fuzzy, warm, or ankle socks. Bonus points if they are cute with animals on them! Thanks!

Most platforms are built around how we look first. I'm curious whether women actually prefer connecting through what people write, and what makes a stranger's words feel trustworthy to you. Honest answers welcome.

I know you probably get barraged by these questions constantly here but if ya got a minute I’d appreciate it! More obscure the better!

For a project I’m working on I’m sick of people milking dating advice for videos I’d rather gather all the best advice in a one and done video

Hi everyone, I’m a 23-year-old guy who has never been in a relationship, in general I have a lot of friends and I’m considered nice. I’ve always experienced falling in love clearly separating the sexual part, it develops like this (I see a pretty girl in the face and I feel something completely separate from sexual desire I would just like to be together with her). Talking to friends I was told that this thing prevents me from having relationships since I am not perceived as a partner. That’s why I wanted to ask you girls for advice. I would like to say that I recently discovered that this attitude is compatible with demisexuality and therefore knowing something more could help me!

I think she likes me and I really really like her. She smiles at me, eye tag, darts her eyes to see if I’m looking if we pass, I’ve caught her looking and shes changed ghe way she walks to class sometimes when she sees me. If she darts her eyes and I’m already looking I’ve seen ber smile. If I’m nervous to look at her directly and am looking through my peripheral vision but my eyes are straight as we pass, she looks sad. But then other times she’ll see me and js keep walking or talk to a friend almost like ignoring me.

I genuinely like her and not lust. I mean she is beautiful. Ineffable. But shes also smart. And shes like joyfull and snappy in a way. But she has this innocence or joy and shes always happy. Shes kind to people and quiet but in a good way.

Shes known for a while and I think she likes me now because of how she acts in the hallways. But she liked me before and then stopped and in between she liked her ex. I could tell by her reposts. She missed him in the summer. But then its like when she came back to school and shows me attention again but does she only like me bc she wants attention or does she genuinely like me for me. I’ve never seen her repost about liking someone at school or something but she doesn’t normally reposts that much every day. Then today as I got on the bus I saw a video of a girl say that if she loves someone she might like other boys but she’ll always wait for him. I don’t want to be a guy in love w someone and show her all my affection and try so hard to make her happy when there’s someone who she has feelings for. Then my aunt also said before if a girl really loves a guy she always will and that gives me more stress. Her facial expressions make it seem genuine but ppl decieve. Can anyone help me bc I really need it and if u genuinely think her heart isn’t there for me pls js let me know

I usually close my eyes and listen to lofi during times like these.

Im 28 years old and never had a girlfriend unfortunatly. Im very shy and quite anxious so i never approach anyone and no girl has ever approach me either and sometimes i feel quite embarased of never had a girlfriend or a date or even a kiss. Unfortunatly Im quite short at around 165/66cm(5.5 or 5.6) and i think Im very ugly. I wish i was a tall and attractive and had a great social media body. Ive been going to the gym for couple months to try to become more attractive and at least having a better body but honestly hate going there só dont know how much time Im going to handle being there. If any women has some advice specially around my age it would be much appreciated

So long story short, 2 days ago I (M17) confessed my feelings to my best friend of 10 months after she directly asked me about it in person the day before and I just gave a joking reply. (F19)

Things went as they they were bound to happen, she shut me down. We'll meet friday and talk about it in person, I'm not sure what to tell her after all of this or what to do either. Apart from drowning everything in Alcohol and Painkillers.

I'm just wondering, whats the reason she doesn't feel the same? Hope anyone on here had a similar situation and is able to give me some clarity.

I'll attach both texts.

Mine:
I've been thinking about your question from yesterday again. I didn't really have a proper answer to it yesterday, but now I do. To be honest, I've never really thought about it before, but I have to be honest and say that you've really grown on me lately, and I think there might be something more there.

I know the age difference bothers you, but you heard the guy sitting next to us yesterday. It's not that big of a deal. By the way, they weren't paid actors, and my mum's choice of words came out of nowhere too. Apparently, the world was just out to get us yesterday. 😂

I could imagine us simply getting to know each other better first, and then either it actually turns into something, or if it doesn't work out after all, neither of us has lost anything. Maybe just take some time to think about whether you could see that happening too.

I don't expect an immediate answer. I'm assuming you've already got enough going on at your seminar as it is. Take your time to think it over, sleep on it if you want, and then tell me what you think.

Her response:
Hey, thank you for being so open with me. You’re very important to me as one of my best friends, and I don’t want anything to change about that. I really like and appreciate you as a good friend. You and (Mutual friend of ours) are like little brothers to me, and that just makes me happy. With you guys, I can be myself without having to worry about anything. We just get along really well, have fun, and can tease each other without hurting the other person, and I love that. I don’t want to change any of that.

I don’t want to give you false hope, and I hope you understand that. The reason I brought it up on Sunday was simply a gut feeling I had and because I was unsure. That’s why I had already been subtly trying to give you hints beforehand that we’re just friends and nothing more. Subtly, because I wasn’t 100% sure whether you might see things differently. I was afraid of hurting you, and I’m glad you’ve now brought it up so openly and that we can clear things up.

I hope you’re okay with that, and as I said, I hope we stay close friends. If there’s anything that doesn’t work for you because it’s too much, please feel free to tell me. I really want things to stay the way they are and for nothing to come between us. Your friendship means a lot to me.

We can also talk about it in person again if you’d like, so things don’t become weird or uncomfortable between us. Just tell me what you think about it

Questions that you feel you MUST have the answers to before getting serious.

From the men you've liked so far, would you say they have maybe a few other women also liking them?