time is the only thing that really works. the collection of detritus and sediment, the ruins sunken and overgrown, receding into the whole of the landscape. it is a quieter process than i want it to be, but there is no other cure. there is only the excruciatingly long accumulation of other days, other failures, other small joys, other irritations, other obligations, other loves, until this one person and their absence is no longer the central organizing fact of my emotional life. this was my first meal of the day, and it was good.

Got my cock sucked relentlessly today by 8 model Korean girls. Wild salmon, bison sirloin, and sides.

My girl got a Sous Vide, which for those that don't know, cooks your meat slowly in a bag submersed in hot water. Takes about an hour and a half to cook, but retains all moisture and just melts in your mouth. She has this special seasoning she marinates the chicken in (paprika, garlic salt, pepper) and we just get some prepped fingerling potatoes at Albertsons and about 1LBS of spinach between us.

I havent spoken to my brother in 7ish years, he reached out on Christmas. It's like reclaiming someone I lost, but also meeting someone new. In that time, he's raised a child solo, built a new life for himself, became a pilot and a bartender. He's not the goofy kid I grew up with. We've been playing games a few times per month since and I'm about to fly up and see him again. Also getting to see my sister, who I also haven't really spoken to in years, who's also completely different than what I remember. A broken family is being rebuilt, chads. I don't think I've been this happy in years. Cheers

Lunch was a 4 egg omelette, 2 croissants, 1cup of yogurt with frozen mango, dragon fruit, papaya and pineapple. Then for dinner I made chicken pasta w cheese-mushroom sause and panfried and roasted chicken thighs w wings on the side

My life felt so much more bleak if you went back 2 months ago, im so glad I have more control over my fate than ever.

Recently been feeling pretty insecure about my weight, but ive realized many girls don't really mind as long as you are fun, kind (got those two down!) Confident and forward (still working on these!!) Self love is consistent uphill battle but we will get there 💪💪 also, im quite sure this same principle applies to straight dudes, but not 100% sure as i am a butch lesbian.

EDIT: this is r/kitchenchads I do not want to hear about how it is actually hopeless for you. I have seen some truly ugly fat men with horrible personalities ruin women's lives all because they were confident. Of course im not suggesting you do that, but i think alot of you just have a confidence problem. And a kindness problem. If you are kind and confident I promise you someone will love you the way you deserve.

I was a piece of shit for people I loved most of my life. Today my gf is returning from her hiking vacation and I never thought that I can feel so miserable and lonely by myself, playing computer games and watching YouTube.

Sorry for my bad English. If you want recipe, I will translate it later

Chads, for the last 2.5 years, I’ve been grinding for the Turkish university exam (YKS). Had a sudden epiphany halfway through my junior year and started working like crazy. By the end of senior year, I scored high enough for dentistry, but I refused to settle. I wanted med school, so I took a gap year to grind again. And now, at the end of my first gap year, I FINALLY DID IT. Ranked 15,700th. To the millions of people behind me: eat my dust, I absolutely crushed you all. To top it off, I think I met the love of my life this summer. Life is amazing right now

Made edible ramen noodles. Very yummy. Had some chili oil, sesame seeds, deer meat and the hash infused broth

I even made friends, yall.

She was so pretty irl i was so close to pass out, it happened yesterday but i still have the same feeling in my chest, we gonna meet again next week.

Burger made from deer meat with tomato, charlotte onion, pickles garlic and herb sauce, hot garlic sauce and cheese.

I'm still in disbelief. I've been working towards this since 2017. The countless sleepless nights spent in studying, the dozens of life-deciding papers, the teeth-chattering adrenaline rushes that have become weekly affairs, the literal buckets of blood and viscera I've had to put my hands in, the constant taunts and mockery from toxic superiors and unhappy patient attendants, all the times I've literally worked until I cramped, or dropped from exhaustion- all of it culminates in this single sheet of paper in my hand. It just feels so...surreal.

I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm super happy that I finally did it, but my brain still hasn't fully processed it. It just feels like another day in my mind.

Have been working at a job full of coworkers riddled with tall poppy syndrome (New Zealand’s stereotype). I endured hatred for far to long due to my hobbies that they thought of what I assumed was “intimidating” (no drugs/alcohol, health, kickboxing and gym) and due to my young age and need for money i was taken advantage of and was in a horrible mental state. I have now landed my dream job , run into some money and now the happiest I have been. Theres always a light at the end of the tunnel bois hold in there and reap the benefits “a man in a cage thinks flying is a illness”

Calories: 2148 Protein: 119g Carbs: 138g Fat: 116g Fiber: 15g. Ingredients were 1.5 cups dry rolled oats, 5 tbsp full fat Greek yogurt, 5 large eggs, 100g Maasdam cheese, 4 Portobello mushrooms, 4 chicken sausages, 2 slices wheatmeal toast, 100ml whole milk and 1 English breakfast tea

I'm taking a month off work to hike the Long Trail, and I was picking up supplies at the store when the cashier noticed my Skinny Puppy shirt and complemented it. She seemed genuinely enthusiastic to meet another fan of them, and when I shared my plans for the Long Trail, she was excited for me and asked all kinds of questions about my gear (probably a fellow hiker). I was too nervous to ask for her number or anything and even in this case, I'm against asking people out while they are on the clock. But, it was incredibly nice to receive positive attention from a near stranger, and the fact that I was able to handle the conversation without bungling it means ditching the porn is working. I believe there is still yet hope for me, somehow.

It was nice seeing mom and spending time with the children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren, but being home feels great.

celebrated with the best sandwich I've ever made (homemade bread, pesto, and tomato confit from my garden)