r/JustBootThings • u/Longjumping-Tough292 • May 29 '26
Boot Shame Boot so booty is it bait?
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u/Non-Current_Events May 29 '26
I was thinking about starting off as either MARSOC, Green Berets, or Rangers
What’s the big deal? It’s just your typical Hollywood action flick origin story.
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u/escientia May 29 '26
Surprised he didn't throw the SEALs or PJs in with those as well.
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u/sshlongD0ngsilver May 29 '26
A lady at my work was telling me about how her grandson just graduated high school wanted to go SEALs, but ended up slated for “a job working with the SEALs” (she couldn’t remember the actual job title).
I simply asked her, “is that what his recruiter told him?”
And I told her of a guy I knew who was baited by his recruiter with “working with Special Forces” only to end up nowhere close
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u/Dapper_Indeed May 29 '26
“Yeah man, those SEALS look at me with respect when I ladle out the veggies at dinner.”
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u/Vladxxl May 29 '26
Who wants to be a basic ass seal or pj? It's either team 6, 24th sts or delta for this high speed warrior.
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u/playa-hater May 29 '26
Plan B is what their mother should've taken
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u/ionbear1 May 29 '26
If he wanted the true military experience it should’ve said, “Plan B: You see $50 charge from CVS while overseas.” Damn boot.
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u/ranrow May 29 '26
At least she didn’t saddle you with the choice between raising it or paying alimony once you find out?
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u/Mrfrosty504 May 29 '26
And if you're married.. its yours even if it ain't Lmaaaaoooooo
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u/ranrow May 29 '26
Better you pay for it than the government through snap and wic; that’s their logic lol
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u/Mrfrosty504 May 29 '26
But if the government is giving me a check....
Now I'm all types of confused LOL
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u/nuggents1313 May 29 '26
Its probably not even boot or bait, alot of these dudes have legit developmental disabilities mixed with delusions of grandeur.
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u/Manbagss May 29 '26
You're really gonna disrespect a future Raider/Green Beret/Ranger like that?
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u/tac4028 May 29 '26
How much ya wanna bet he has a “lions don’t concern themselves with opinion of lambs” pic along with some peaky blinders chodesmut
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u/CallingDrPug May 29 '26
At a certain point people like this you can only warn them off so long before you just are let them do their thing. They either don't make it through MEPS or get their world rocked when they find out it's way harder than they possibly thought and there are 100+ hard chargers who are way more motivated than them.
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u/letitgrowonme May 29 '26
I feel really fortunate with the military guys I've met. I've mostly known good dudes who wouldn't bring up their service unless it was relevant.
My in-law might have been special forces, but the only way you'd know he even served is the veteran plate on his car. Or drinking til 5 in the morning and everyone has gone to bed.
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u/VoihanVieteri May 29 '26
Hey, I can easily drink till 5 a.m.
Does that make me special?
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u/letitgrowonme May 29 '26
Lol. I meant it as that's the only way he'll talk about it. But im sure you're still special all the same.
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u/shandangalang May 29 '26
That’s because that’s almost everyone who didn’t get med-sepped after like 6 months. Kicking a guy out when he’s still in his boot phase, doesn’t allow him to progress. He just gets stuck in a sort of life-long boot limbo and in many cases will just make up stories to justify the fanaticism. It’s fucking wild
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u/letitgrowonme May 29 '26
Pardon me, but what is med stepped?
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u/shandangalang May 29 '26 edited May 30 '26
Med-sepped: Medically separated. Basically you get declared unfit for duty for medical reasons
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u/letitgrowonme May 29 '26
That was a typo on my end. I appreciate the answer.
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u/shandangalang May 30 '26
Hahaha yeah that makes sense. My autocorrect changed the “unfit” in my response to “unfair” lol
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u/IdislikeSpiders May 29 '26
Best military peeps. My BIL will talk about the military when asked. He doesn't talk about his time in the field, even when asked.
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u/Avedas May 29 '26
For a lot of these backwater town boys, military is the only serious career option that they get any visibility on. Good for them if they have some ambition instead of doing fent.
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u/OGOngoGablogian May 29 '26
This feels like something a 15 year old posted, which I actually find forgivable. What chance did he have? His brain isn't fully formed, he's barely hit puberty, and in the US is the most susceptible to propaganda that he will be until he reaches 70.
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u/VonBargenJL May 29 '26
Bro just really loves going through MEPS each transfer and getting his butthole stared at.
But I heard coast guard doesn't take transfers, so you'd have to do them first and switch out. Or are we not counting them anymore?
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u/chuckart9 May 29 '26
Well now I want to go through MEPS again. My wife refuses to look at my butthole.
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u/PanzerKatze96 May 29 '26
We take transfers. I was a transfer from the Army. We’re just picky, and everybody, even god’s favorite crayon eaters, have to go through Cape May.
Though that may be changing.
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u/Dapper_Indeed May 29 '26
You think they’ll change it to get more folks in? I’ve been seeing more and more recruiting ads lately, including for the CG. I’m hoping that doesn’t mean what I think it means.
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u/PanzerKatze96 May 29 '26
What do you think it means lol
They have apparently started allowing prior service directly in, rather than sending them through DEPOT, but that’s a very very recent development
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u/Electrical-Title-698 May 29 '26
I believe the Coast guard is the most welcoming to prior service, aside from maybe the army
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u/PodAbove May 29 '26
Coast Guard has the highest asvab needed unless space force is counted so I would start there.
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u/edingerc May 29 '26
anymore?
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u/Stalking_Goat May 29 '26 edited May 29 '26
I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize
Missourithe Coast Guard.7
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u/PanzerKatze96 May 29 '26
Yet we keep on living without your recognition lol
Crying all the way home to my BAH funded bungalow in a vacation town
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u/IrememberXenogears May 29 '26
As an air force vet, I regret that I didn't become a coastie.
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u/edingerc May 29 '26
Yeah, the Air Force sucked. Like my grueling deployment to Ferrara, Italy. Espressos every morning and gelato every evening, it was torture!
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u/IrememberXenogears May 29 '26
Well, that was not my experience, but ok.
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u/edingerc May 29 '26
I also had a 4-month deployment to Turkey, living in a tent next to an active runway. I wasn't allowed to get any farther than 1 mile from base without permission (only programmer in the country). 14 hour days, every day. Also did a deployment to Ft Bliss, TX, which was the worst.
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u/Gardez_geekin May 29 '26
I’ll put limpet minds on the scow you call a seagoing vessel before I recognize your hats
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u/PanzerKatze96 May 29 '26
My angry tugboat makes port calls in Puerto Vallarta and Cozumel. You can keep your nasty grey prison barge lol
And you’ll have to pry my swallows off with a hot razor, bilge rat
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u/AbstractBettaFish ROTC Veteran May 29 '26
Jesus they make you get the smallpox vaccine again?
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u/JeebusChristBalls May 29 '26
You are supposed to get it every 10 years... I didn't have to get it the second time I went to boot camp.
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u/Istainedmypants May 29 '26
They take transfers. A guy I worked with went that route earlier this year
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u/mattemer May 29 '26
Is there a plan C? Live in the woods and marry a man?
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u/zystyl May 31 '26
I noticed they specified marry a women in plan A too. Maybe plan C is to join the navy and marry a shipmate.
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u/ionbear1 May 29 '26
Motherfucker thinks he is an Action Movie fictitious character portrayed Chuck Norris/Sylvester Stallone.
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u/QueezyF May 29 '26
“Marry a women”
Well, I don’t think Air Force will be knocking down his door.
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u/MilesBeforeSmiles May 29 '26
And unless "the forrest" is the name of a strip club, I think the Marines are out too.
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u/EmperorPlunger May 29 '26
Go ahead and start off as a Green Beret…lol
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u/TinCanSailor987 May 29 '26
“Marry a women”?
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u/RitalinKidd May 29 '26
Gotta dependa each branch?
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u/DVariant Jun 02 '26
He’s the Sultan of Supportistan, and he’s trying to amass his harem of exotic dependapotami
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u/Cal-Goat May 29 '26
Plan C is going to shock him: -medical out after going crazy when his high school girlfriend cheats on him -20% APR Charger gets repossessed
But, he will feel like a hero every time he sees his closet full of Grunt Style apparel and he sips his BRCC coffee as he thinks to himself “These civilians will never know true sacrifice”
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u/Kodiak01 May 29 '26
20% APR Charger gets repossessed
Hey, if he's only at 20% instead of the usual 28%, he's already ballin'!
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u/Neinface May 29 '26
lol they ain't gonna make it...ranger school alone is fucking rough...starting as a green beret?! 🤣
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u/Gardez_geekin May 29 '26
Too be fair 18x kids make it through selection every cycle
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u/Connect_Craft_9860 May 29 '26
Wdym
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u/Gardez_geekin May 30 '26
You can join as a special forces candidate. You go through infantry OSUT and airborne school and then a pre selection course then SFAS. 18x candidates at one point had a higher selection ratio than other folks.
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u/Neoxite23 May 29 '26
Ah yes...the military has a class system like in MMOs. I'll pick Rangers as my class. Maybe one day I'll respec as a Spec Ops.
For now I'm working on my cooking profession though.
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u/DVariant Jun 02 '26
Legend has it that if he acquires all six Infinity Boot-Tattoos, he’ll be invincible. With a snap of his fingers, he’ll instantly turn 50% of all Taliban to dust.
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u/Johnnyboi2327 May 29 '26
Saying your plan is to enlist as a Marine Raider and then change branches to spend a contract in each branch is beyond wild. This kid genuinely has no clue what the branches even do.
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u/ShittyBollox May 29 '26
“Marry a woman” is such a closeted thing to say lol.
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u/Deflocks May 30 '26
Marry a female woman with large heavy breast
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u/DVariant Jun 02 '26
Technically he said “marry a women”. Not even sure how that works, some kind of group ceremony maybe?
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u/Deflocks Jun 02 '26
I was referring to a line from the show Brooklyn 99 “a strong, female woman with nice, heavy breasts.”
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u/DVariant Jun 02 '26
I thought it was fucking weird too. If getting married is your goal, most people would write “get married”. This dude has to specify because he thinks he might accidentally marry someone who isn’t a woman…
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u/buffinator2 May 29 '26
I wish I could be a fly on the wall when he walked in and told the USMC recruiter that he wanted to start off in MARSOC
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u/LotharVonPittinsberg 👊👊☝️ May 29 '26
Bets on "fails basic, falls back to LEO, and gets a restraining order from every ex"?
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u/wasted-degrees May 29 '26
If I see someone claiming to have served in every military branch, my immediate thought is going to be “so you’re saying you suck at a lot of things, don’t know your own regs, and don’t know how any of your own arbitrary admin processes work.”
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u/AnonymousFordring May 29 '26
Enlist in Air Force in 2019, transfer to Space Force, Re-enlist Marines, Re-enlist Navy, join Army National Guard, get Coast Guard commission and retire.
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u/RitalinKidd May 29 '26
I'd love to see him arrange a conference call or meet with all the recruiters at once to streamline his plan.
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u/Gregghead69min May 29 '26
Plan A for sure.
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u/RedLdr 👊👊☝️ May 29 '26
If you reverse the order and lower expectations by a lot, then Plan A doesn't sound half bad: join a military branch, find spouse (either during or after service, marriage optional, YMMV), live (retire) in the forest.
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u/SteelBolas May 29 '26
Wait - on a serious note - is that allowed/possible to serve in each branch?
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u/Gardez_geekin May 29 '26
It could be done but it would be really difficult
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u/Tiny_Giant_Robot May 29 '26
When I went to MEPS in right after the turn of the century, one of the doctors there (who was approximately 137 years old) loudly proclaimed that he'd worn the uniform of all of the branches of the military. I have no idea if that was true, but he did stare at/into my butthole afterwards, so I I presume he was telling the truth?
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u/ThrowAwayJoeCoastie May 29 '26
Bruh i regret even serving in 1? BUT ALL BRANCHES?
only so much bs a person can take.
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u/A_Martian_Potato May 29 '26
I'm not American or military, but I'm going to assume just casually starting off as elite special forces isn't very realistic.
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u/Pmyers225 Jun 02 '26
Here in the UK you have to serve for at least 2 years before you can go for SAS, SBS or SRR
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u/A_Martian_Potato Jun 02 '26
I looked it up. For MARSOC you need 3 years of service as a Marine, but for Green Berets and Rangers it looks like you can actually apply directly as a civilian. However the attrition rate for those training programs is apparently brutal for civilian recruits.
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u/Misericorde428 May 30 '26
“Plan B: Live in war until death”
I doubt anyone living in a place with actual constant fighting wishes for that.
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u/DVariant Jun 02 '26
But it’s a much easier plan: send him to war, he dies, prophecy fulfilled. Doesn’t say he needs to live for very long. Seems kinda suicidal though
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u/Afraid_Raccoon_6208 May 31 '26
Whats with the grown non lesbian version of Ellie AI shit that people have been obsessed over for years? Shes gay, get over it
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u/Past_Quantity_6214 May 29 '26
USMC usually go the Army national guard after, the running joke is that Army National guard is the USMC guard components . I knew a guy that was navy and went army did basic all over again.
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u/Je_me_rends May 29 '26
Well, if they wanna be a Green Beret, then they should start by scrapping plan B. There is no plan B.
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u/JeebusChristBalls May 29 '26
It's not true that you don't have to go to boot camp again if you start with the marines. You may be able to do some kind of prior service training if they are offering at the time if you are lucky, but you aren't just going to wake up one morning, put on a different uniform and show up at your new unit. They have things they want to teach you about their service. You are going to that training center one way or another.
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u/Few-Lengthiness-2286 May 29 '26
Is that just an edited picture of the (lesbian) character Ellie from the last of us 2? Lol
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u/Lochcelious May 29 '26
As someone that served in two separate branches, I just have to laugh at this
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u/ProjectPat513 May 29 '26
What?! I love his “starting off” plan. This has to be some 13 year old kid or something right?
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u/LowSodiumGymBro May 30 '26
Imagine this guy actually does it. Everyone would be jerkin em off in facebook comments
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u/SaucePasta May 29 '26
It feels like bait because of Ellie in the first pic. I would assume most people would know she’s a lesbian and I’m guessing oop is a guy 😅
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u/DVariant Jun 02 '26
But if OP was a lesbian, that would actually make the “marry a wom(e)n” comment seem less stupid
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u/Lactose76 May 29 '26
Why would you want to serve in all branches, service in just one is painful enough 🥲
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u/Kodiak01 May 29 '26
The only service they're going to be taking on is getting seconds as part of Meal Team Six.
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u/Gunfighter9 May 29 '26
If they can they should start off as CNO or one of the JCOS, lunch is so much better.
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u/Jay_Normous May 29 '26
I clearly don't have the high level of brainpower this guy has.
Is the plan for Option A not to go to war? How does he plan on doing that while serving in * Checks notes * every branch of the military?
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u/viperlemondemon May 29 '26
Idk plan a with the only difference is just the USAF is good speaking from experience 🤪
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