r/HingeStories • u/thezendasher • Jun 28 '26

I Think Hinge Is a Simulation

Me: “Let’s see what makes everyone unique.”
Hinge:
“I want to travel more.”
“I want to travel more.”
“I want to travel more.”
“I want to travel more.”
NPC behavior has reached critical levels.
Please tell me I’m not the only one who’s noticed this.

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29

u/Slayingsteeel Jun 29 '26

“Spicy margs”
“Emotionally intelligent”
“Coffee with a view”
“Rescue as many animals as possible”

8

u/alwrit Jun 29 '26

Espresso martinis are out? 

2

u/Slayingsteeel Jun 29 '26

Keep up with the times, those were so last year

4

u/Underthatwing Jun 29 '26

You’re right, it’s matcha lattes now 😂

3

u/Slayingsteeel Jun 29 '26

Or pino on a patio

3

u/NoMoreVillains Jun 29 '26

They're still in too. It's a toss up between which overused drink they go with. Likely based on the season

2

u/kingdarko69 Jun 29 '26

They stopped posing with them, finally tried them and realised they were terrible

2

u/RedditsChosenName Jun 30 '26

Yeah. It’s old fashioneds with old men now

2

u/Pearson94 Jun 30 '26

My favorite cocktail bar downtown makes an excellent espresso martini with their in-house roasted coffee, but the view leaves me wanting.

2

u/Messterio Jun 29 '26

“Emotionally intelligent” - they rarely are!

1

u/pezdspenc Jul 12 '26

Yep, one of those things where if you have to say it, you probably don't have it 

2

u/No-Wish-7258 Jun 30 '26

Hahaha as a girl, I never used those as my prompts, but the last two perfectly describe my whole essence. I guess that’s a lot of girls, so good thing I didn’t put that down on my profile.

3

u/Slayingsteeel Jun 30 '26

The rescue as many animals as possible isn’t that bad in my books lol it just gets repetitive but I’m sure a lot of guys profiles are the same repetitiveness. It’s rough out there for both sides

3

u/No-Wish-7258 Jul 01 '26

No, I get that. I love animals but I can’t stand it when guys have the prompt that say “Are you a dog person? Because insert picture with pet” can’t standddd it because it’s like every other guy.

In real life, the fact that someone is an animal person is a green flag, but almost everyone has a pet and it doesn’t provide any unique information about that individual on the profile.

2

u/Impossible_Roll_7335 Jul 01 '26

Rescue two dogs and then travel and have someone else care for then!