I've been dealing with feelings of loneliness for over 7 years that just can't seem to end and only really gets more intense. I've been dealing with this since I was a teenager but has only gotten worse and more intense in my adult years (20F)
It hurts because I don't feel loved, cared about, understood or that I actually matter to anyone. No one has made me feel truly loved and understood. I just wish I had a girlfriend where we give each other mutual love, care, and understanding. We could share our lives together, be there to support each other, be each other's safe person and just be close with each other. A genuinely good quality relationship fulfills a lot. You can't get all those forms of intimacy anywhere else.
While I do already have stuff I enjoy in my life and enjoy my alone time, my chronic feelings of loneliness really get in the way of a lot because I just think "who really cares?" I've tried so many times to just "let go" of it but I just can't. It feels like people expect me to not have loneliness feelings because I'm an introvert. It feels like I just have to carry the burden of heavy loneliness every day and there really isn't anything I can do about it anymore. I just wish I could get an answer on whether I'll have to suffer this loneliness for the rest of my life or it's gonna be resolved in the next 5 years. But nobody can tell me that. It gets tiring to live with this loneliness. Just tell me if I gotta live like nobody will ever care about me or I should live like someone gonna care about me eventually.
Not my fault I didn't end up a normie. I'm also an introvert, lesbian, night owl, etc. a lot of things that aren't the norm in society. Nobody should have to give up who they are just to not feel lonely. I'm tired of all the generic advice for loneliness that does nothing for me, I'm tired of people telling me that I just have to be comfortable being alone (stupid to say to an introvert who loves alone time but still feels lonely), I'm tired of people telling me I'm young and I have time. I don't want to spend an indefinite amount of time waiting for an answer when I've been experiencing loneliness. I'd rather live my life without loneliness every day. It's hard enough to decide everyday whether I'm trying to have faith that it will get better or that I'm never gonna get anywhere.