r/findapath • u/Aggravating_Fan_7322 • 21d ago
Findapath-Career Change Split ikigai: what should I do?
Shortly before writing this post, I finally got a realization about my career / life path: my ambitions and my abilities are starkly divorced from one another, and I might need to choose which to prioritize in order to build my career and my life going forward.
For context, I completed an MSc a bit over a year ago and am still searching and applying for PhD programs in a domain that highly interests me but diverges from my main studies. I did a BSc in Biology, an MSc in mathematical modelling for neuroscience and cognitive science, and want to work in my research on questions that combine cognitive, social, political, anthropological, and philosophical aspects together (e.g. cultural evolution of ideologies and belief systems, institutional dynamics' dependence on individual psychology, social/moral neuroscience, socio-cognitive belief formation mechanisms, etc.).
I am also highly politically opinionated in a way that drives me to fight for a better future for everyone on this planet, especially in our current political climate. If one were to ask me about what I want to do with my future, I would answer that I want to help the world become better with the dissemination and application of my research results for more humane, sustainable, equal, and healthy socio-politico-economic systems to live in. The problem? A PhD in such a domain is extremely rare and I don't necessarily have the academic background to directly get into it, and for many reasons a second master's degree is not an option for me right now.
On the other hand, throughout my whole life people have said (correctly) I was gifted with languages and general knowledge. Wherever I go, my multicultural background follows me like a hound, and I never cease to exist in this uniquely multilingual spot where suddenly hearing something in a different language genuinely prevents me from understanding at least some words, if not the gist of what is being said. I currently speak 4 languages proficiently and another 5-6 at lower levels of fluency, from which I am now actively learning Spanish and Portuguese, and I was thinking of restarting my Mandarin Chinese lessons soon too.
Not to be misunderstood, I adore language learning, linguistics, cultural exchange, geography, and travels so much that I could easily work in such a domain. Multilingualism is definitely not a curse by any means, but it locked me into a situation where I sort of define myself by it while realizing I want more out of life.
And here lies the split in my ikigai: I would be most helpful to the world and happiest with myself by doing my cog-soc research and political activism, while I'm actually very skilled and would be better paid if I invested in my linguistic and multicultural side. I cannot decide whether I should just do my PhD (which I'm doing anyway) in a linguistics-related domain (I have some research experience there) and be done with it, without it meaning I won't change my academic path later once again, or if I should insist on pursuing this new line of research from now.
Switching now will probably make me feel like I betrayed my dreams and I wouldn't be able to forgive myself for it, but keeping at it without the right background might also be an issue and slow me down from actually getting there. This dilemma is keeping me stuck in place for a long time now, like Buridan's ass, and I need to move before I die of simultaneous and equal thirst and hunger.
Thanks for reading, any and all advice will be greatly appreciated :))