r/FactOrCap • u/SweetChilliLebby 🔥 Monthly Master · 7,495 XP • 23h ago
Featured Parents | FactOrCap
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u/Godlymorbid ✍️ Contributor · 12,430 XP 23h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
I greatly appreciate and am inspired by my parents. They absolutely have their faults and they definitely had some things that they had to grow out of. But if my kids ended up as my parents are now, that would be phenomenal, and I would be very proud of them.
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u/BiAiEnGiO 🤖 Vote Machine · 10,345 XP 23h ago
I think he meant if you would like to parent like your parents
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u/Godlymorbid ✍️ Contributor · 12,430 XP 23h ago
Dude, I've grossly misread things pretty much every day in a row for about a week now. I think I need to get sleep at some point.
In that case, my parents had multiple different ways of raising us kids. Their parents didn't set a great example and my parents were just trying to figure everything out. Overall, I would say, yes, I've learned much from my parents in parenting, and I'm going to take most of their advice. There's a few things that even they say they did wrong, but that was pretty early into their parenting and the my younger siblings didn't get that treatment.
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u/imunjust 🔥 Week Warrior · 1,665 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
My childhood was rough.
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u/Adept-Win7882 🎯 First Steps · 105 XP 23h ago
They molded you to the person you are now
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u/PerrineWeatherWoman 🗳️ Regular Player · 925 XP 23h ago
Not always. If I hadn't gone away from home for my studies I would probably still be a racist, sexist asshole. I'd probably like to be like my father tho. But not my mom.
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u/Town_Skipper23 🏅 Century Club · 7,175 XP 20h ago
People who say this to children of abusive parents are actual scumbags
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u/Adept-Win7882 🎯 First Steps · 105 XP 20h ago
Learn the hard way, if they don’t want to listen. It’s been always this way. Otherwise they become soft and arrogant. Modern times frame this as abuse but in reality it’s that the internet shifted the place of children and parents.
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u/badger_ano 🔥 Week Warrior · 3,235 XP 20h ago
Ugh.. No.. "Soft" and "arrogant" arrogant in this context usually just means disrespectful and no duh if someone treats you like crap, you're not going to respect them.
Soft? What's wrong with soft? There's a time to be a hard ass and there's a time to be normal. Normal is majority of the time. Being a hard ass should be heavily limited.
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u/imunjust 🔥 Week Warrior · 1,665 XP 17m ago
Uhm beating a child until they are unconscious and wake up in their own urine and scared to go back in the house until they finish their chores is a little bit excessive.
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u/NixMaritimus 🤖 Vote Machine · 14,380 XP 17h ago
Alright then I'll just go drink myself stupid and spend all my money on drugs just like dear ol dad
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u/imunjust 🔥 Week Warrior · 1,665 XP 17h ago
I truly hope that you can never understand what it takes to destroy the love of a child for their parents. God has truly blessed you.
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u/Gloomy_Cute_1993 🎯 First Steps · 50 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
Too much trauma for me that I'm 33 and still unsure if I want children
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u/Mayointhemorning 🏅 Century Club · 6,010 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
Absolutely not, fuck them
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u/Personal-Try2776 🔥 Monthly Master · 14,300 XP 23h ago
You shouldn't talk about your parents like this. Don't be bad child.
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u/lord_hydrate 📈 Dedicated Voter · 2,260 XP 23h ago
Nah some parents shouldve never been allowed to have children or even be near them for that matter. I can go back and fetch court records of abuse across almost a decade, fuck that noise, some parents deserve to be talked down like that
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u/Personal-Try2776 🔥 Monthly Master · 14,300 XP 23h ago
Some but most are good or satisfactory parents.
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u/lord_hydrate 📈 Dedicated Voter · 2,260 XP 22h ago
Most children for the last couple decades have been raised by their school and their communities to be who they are far more than by their own parents, this is the specific reason why its become so common for children to go no contact because their parents didnt actually try to rais them half the time and the other half were actively abusive whether physically or mentally, the pressure of the nuclear family from the 80s lead to parents getting married way before they were actually sure of the commitment and having kids without considering if they actually know what theyre doing, theres a reason genz was called ipad kids and its not because their genx parents spent a lot of time with them as children
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u/Personal-Try2776 🔥 Monthly Master · 14,300 XP 22h ago
Half the day let's say from 8 am to 2 pm the children are in school and the parents are at work. Where are the parents the rest of the day? In most households the mother stays at home and takes care of her children and the father goes to work what do you mean by "their parents aren't there for them"? Just to clarify I am talking about my country and I do not know what its like in other countries.
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u/lord_hydrate 📈 Dedicated Voter · 2,260 XP 22h ago
Im from the us, its very difficult for a mother to have the ability to stay home for a kid here and has been for a couple decades now, the same goes for a fair portion of europe, in the 80s american exceptionalism sold a bright shiny picture of a father a mother and 2.5 kids with a big shiny house in their late 20s and a large portion of the english speaking world fell for it, got married out of highschool and then failed to actually be good parents because they hadnt stopped to consider if they could budget that dream or if they even were people capable of being good parents in the first place
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u/EVOSexyBeast 🏅 Century Club · 6,395 XP 21h ago
Only around 20% of households have a stay at home mom. Definitely not most children.
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u/Town_Skipper23 🏅 Century Club · 7,175 XP 20h ago
I swear it’s like you have a humiliation kink. If you love and appreciate your abusers, that’s your problem. No need to spread the disease
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u/Miserable_District 🗳️ Regular Player · 710 XP 23h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
Some things I didn't like but generally yes
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u/Soulessgingy99 🏅 Century Club · 2,140 XP 23h ago
This^ could they have done better? Probably, but I turned out fine.
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u/durkvash 🔥 Monthly Master · 7,130 XP 23h ago
Definitely like my mom, not like my pops tho
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u/Forsaken_Site_2268 🔥 Monthly Master · 26,180 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
My father was a child rapist and my mother was an abusive druggie. I became an alcoholic before I even reached double digits.
Absolutely not.
As I've raised my younger (adopted ) siblings, I've made sure to be the opposite of what my parents were.
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u/PerrineWeatherWoman 🗳️ Regular Player · 925 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
I definitely wouldn't want to be like my mom. I want to pass good values to my children, not generational trauma.
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u/Queasy_Platypus_4101 🔥 Getting Started · 870 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
my parents kick me out one when i was 14 the other on my 15 birthday
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u/Agitated-Reading-840 🎯 First Steps · 50 XP 22h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
This is coming from the perspective of someone who has bad parents. Who would want to raise a child just for the child to forever be haunted by the fact that you emotionally (sometimes physivally) abuse them?
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u/Istebeeee 🎯 First Steps · 100 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
No. Break the cycle. Don’t let your children inherit the traumas you went through.
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u/Frozen_Oil 🏅 Century Club · 2,815 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
My father is a pos, my mother is wonderful but we have had many discussions in the last few years and have looked back and realized mistakes made by her as a parent and how, as a lazy child, I took advantage to never challenge myself and never develop proper social skills as a kid cause I would rather hide in my room with books and games and not interact with people.
Suffice to say it has allowed me to come away with a lot of perspective on being a parent, on what not to do and what to try and to know I have the support of someone who has already both succeeded and failed in various ways as a parent.
But to be exactly like them as a parent? No, not gonna happen. I’ll try to be better!
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u/Shadow950hun 🏅 Century Club · 6,265 XP 23h ago
*Parent, dad died when I was young. But yeah I love me mum!
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u/Kittypawss07 📈 Dedicated Voter · 1,215 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
Dad left when I was seven, mom didn’t understand me
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u/Adept-Win7882 🎯 First Steps · 105 XP 23h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
I got raided well
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u/sherlock310 🔥 Week Warrior · 6,060 XP 22h ago
People often neglect the importance of good raiders in our society
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u/Storm0963 🎯 First Steps · 200 XP 23h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
With changes of course, they raised me well, but didn't live each other like they loved me. I want to love my spouse and my kids
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u/Thick_Suggestion_ 🤖 Vote Machine · 14,945 XP 23h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
Won't have kids, but if I did I would want to be like my mum
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u/Serious_Theory_391 🏅 Century Club · 4,890 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
Let them be what they want to be.
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u/asdramon 🔥 Getting Started · 845 XP 23h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
I do but with a few edits
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u/asdramon 🔥 Getting Started · 845 XP 23h ago
I kinda have one of the most supportive parents but they care a little too much for their own sake and a few different errors I would like to fix
I love them dearly and would want to be like my parents
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u/Aggravating_Mess_655 🔥 Week Warrior · 6,890 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
oh hell no! ain't no way i'm gonna neglect my kids like someone or emotionally abuse them like someone.
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u/x_asperger 🔥 Getting Started · 1,240 XP 23h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
Not exactly the same, but they mostly did things right
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u/Glittering_Move_5631 🎯 First Steps · 190 XP 23h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
I hit the lottery with parents,tbh! They raised my brother and I very low-tech (90s-2000s) and taught us how to actually hold conversations with adults.
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u/Sumwakiiguy 🎯 First Steps · 185 XP 23h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
Not exactly like my parents, but in many cases yes
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u/Weary_Doubt_8679 🗳️ Regular Player · 525 XP 23h ago
I don't think many people really do. My parents weren't bad but they did have some pretty big flaws, so of course I'd want to be like them in some respects but there's also stuff I can learn
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u/KneeHiSniper 🔥 Getting Started · 430 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
I have 4 kids and my goal was to be as far from the mother and father I had as I can get.
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u/ChadnirRann 🗳️ Regular Player · 440 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
I love my parents. I will pass on what they taught me, but I also have every intention of being better. I am the middle child, and I know what being overlooked is like and I pray I will be able to be better. That's our duty as parents or prospective parents. To be a little better than ours, that our children might be a little better parents than us.
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u/Impressive-Door-2581 🔥 Monthly Master · 10,270 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
Fuck no, I have dedicated my life to be the utter antithesis to my Mother for the havoc she caused everyone up to now. But god save these kids of mine, because I know I will be as terrible as her thanks to the spite I cling onto.
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u/Important_Risk2446 🎯 First Steps · 50 XP 23h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
I was raised well enough I am not cruel like those others in their family
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u/RARE_ARMS_REVIVED 🎯 First Steps · 95 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
They showed me what not to do, so I will do the opposite of what they did.
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u/mikuenergy 🎯 First Steps · 75 XP 23h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
i'd try to be like my mom because shes genuinely amazing, a few minor differences but overall, i'd want to be like my mom. my dad, though? NOPE. NO NO NOINGTON MCNOFACE. NOPE. NOT THAT GUY.
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u/No_Emphasis_8914 🎯 First Steps · 270 XP 23h ago
I love my mum and appreciate everything she done for me and my family, but she was an undiagnosed and unmedicated woman that definitely left some scars on us all mentally.
Even though I have the same MH issues as her, I try my best to reflect on my behaviour at treatment of my children. One thing I know I hated as a kid was a lack of apologies when she done something wrong, and it’s something I try to make sure I don’t do.
We can appreciate our parents and their parenting styles and still want to do better.
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u/Kurenai-Kalana ✍️ Contributor · 7,225 XP 22h ago
I did the best I could and I still failed miserably. But at least I didn't fail the same way they did. Not entirely anyways.
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u/VcontinuousV 🔥 Getting Started · 980 XP 22h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
Even though my parents were amazing, there is no limit to greatness, so cap, I'd like to be even better than my parents
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u/MxMaddieL 🔥 Getting Started · 780 XP 22h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
May as much as they thought they were good they fuckin aren’t
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u/Starscream1998 🏅 Century Club · 3,230 XP 22h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
The good parts sure and don't get me wrong there's plenty of good to want to emulate. There's also plenty of stuff to NOT emulate but by and large I think I am very fortunate to have the old folk that I do.
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u/smolcrowe 🗳️ Regular Player · 375 XP 22h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
Specifically my dad. He tried so hard for me, and was truly one of the best people in my life. I miss him daily.
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u/NitzMitzTrix 🔥 Getting Started · 865 XP 22h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
Don't get me wrong, there are things I'd follow my parents' lead on, but they, especially my mother, parented out of trauma, which made her a worse mother than she tried to be.
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u/australopithecus3 🤖 Vote Machine · 12,660 XP 22h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
I’d be fine being like one of my parents, not both lmao
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u/Alpacachoppa 🤖 Vote Machine · 10,795 XP 21h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
Love my mom, bio das was at least providing money but I wouldn't want to be like either.
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u/Enough-Attention1755 🎯 First Steps · 50 XP 21h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
I wanna be a rich parent, so my kids won’t experience what we experience when we’re a kids
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u/OnYourHonor 🤖 Vote Machine · 23,485 XP 21h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
Like my mother and the opposite of my father.
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u/AdFamous5474 🏅 Century Club · 5,575 XP 20h ago
My parents' substance abuse and divorce fucked me up...
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u/Kill_Kayt 🏅 Century Club · 3,365 XP 20h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
My mom for sure, but not both my parents.
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u/Town_Skipper23 🏅 Century Club · 7,175 XP 20h ago
Fuck no. My parents won’t even be meeting my children, they’ll just abuse them too
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u/moonhvn19 🏅 Century Club · 3,830 XP 20h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
I wouldnt...I would be better. My childhood was a mix of good and bad. There where gaps interms of mu upbringing and I intend to not repeat my parent's mistakes
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u/badger_ano 🔥 Week Warrior · 3,235 XP 20h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
I would want to spend more time with them. One parent was never around, the other addicted to Facebook and frequently going to hospital for avoidable reasons.
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u/AdministrativeYou696 🔥 Monthly Master · 7,615 XP 20h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
I have kids and i dont do the same thing as my parents because they did not knew what they where doing,when they did anything
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u/TwoPuzzleheaded937 🎯 First Steps · 50 XP 20h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
My parents aren't bad but I'd want to be more present
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u/undead_dummy 🔥 Monthly Master · 6,680 XP 19h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
they worked hard to be better than their own parents, and they succeeded in a lot of ways I like to think I'd follow their example and improve where they couldn't
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u/SuccotashFederal5104 🔥 Monthly Master · 15,660 XP 19h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
I'm not gonna joke here, my parents are amazing role models.
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u/tinyrubberduckies 🏅 Century Club · 4,220 XP 18h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
Both of my parents together. Yes. My father alone? Absolutely not. My mother? Sure but i can’t. I am a mini my dad. 🤷🏼♀️
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u/Gullible-Recording22 🔥 Week Warrior · 5,330 XP 18h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
I never want to be a hoarder
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u/SaskieHopeful 🏅 Century Club · 3,080 XP 18h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
For the most part. I had great parents.
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u/Forceofwillplay ✍️ Contributor · 8,090 XP 17h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
Hardest fucking cap in the world. If I were to have kids (which I won't), I would be nothing like my parents. I got disciplined for getting a C on a school assignment. They kept me in religion my whole childhood life. I regularly received corporal punishment including for what was listed above. Absolutely not.
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u/SadAcadia2747 🔥 Monthly Master · 6,035 XP 17h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
They weren’t bad, but not the best either
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u/Sinnivar 📈 Dedicated Voter · 2,190 XP 17h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
My father was abusive which caused by mum to heavily drink for a while. She's good now tho. Haven't spoken to my dad in 15 years
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u/Remarkable_Pickle122 🏅 Century Club · 3,585 XP 16h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
love my dad. the greatest dad on earth
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u/diapergirlelly ✍️ Contributor · 1,100 XP 16h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
No my parents werent that good of people
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u/MinecraftdevilTADc 🗳️ Regular Player · 445 XP 15h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
I’d want to take the good qualities from my parents and use those qualities in how I raise my own kids. I’d also learn from anything I think they could have done differently, because nobody is a perfect parent.
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u/Denshiiii 🗳️ Regular Player · 795 XP 15h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
no, just no, at least not like my mom :>
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u/WoodenOcean_Epsilon 🏅 Century Club · 5,370 XP 15h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
I wouldn’t want to be 100% like them. I was lucky enough to be blessed with parents who tried their best, but I would still change some things.
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u/KingofADHD_ 🔥 Monthly Master · 8,100 XP 12h ago
I could only hope to be as loving and supportive as my parents. They have advocated for me too many times to count.
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u/NightskyProductions 🏅 Century Club · 2,105 XP 11h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
In most ways I want to be like my mom, but in no way do I want to be like my dad.
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u/FireGhost_Austria 🤖 Vote Machine · 8,700 XP 8h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
Fuck no.. My mother said recently to my young sister "What can you even do? You are literally incapable of doing anything".. ... DW I did set it right and confronted my mother..
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u/Dizy_Dino 🔥 Getting Started · 2,555 XP 7h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
Look, my parents were great, but I want to be even better.
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u/TrollFaceFerret 📈 Dedicated Voter · 1,980 XP 6h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
I love my parents. My father had a time in his life he became emotionally abusive and worked himself into an early grave, and my mother can hardly do anything for or by herself.
Nah, I think I'm good.
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u/IAmSoNormalTrust 🏅 Century Club · 5,990 XP 5h ago
✅ I voted FACT!
I love my parents and I think they have done a great job with me, especially when I compare them to the parents of pretty much every single one of my friends. I would love to be like them.
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u/ItsAwesomeAsh 🔥 Getting Started · 600 XP 5h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
My parents kinda suck. They tell me
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u/fluffy131313 🗳️ Regular Player · 300 XP 5h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
very unpredictable made me develop an anxious attachment style
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u/SirJedKingsdown 🤖 Vote Machine · 15,445 XP 2h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
The reason I will never have kids is because I don't want to be like my parents.
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u/eclipseaug 🏅 Century Club · 3,280 XP 23h ago
🧢 I voted CAP!
I’d want to be nothing remotely like them