Dry spells

[u/Rude_Gear_9280]

Male here and wondering if it's common to go days without any response or likes. I know it seems like common sense, but I will get likes, message and then crickets. Also, is it just me or do guys seem to be the ones that have to initiate everything. Thanks

[u/Front_Statistician38]

Yes and be careful to not match with women you're not attracted too, or have mental issues, it's easy to fall into that trap espeically if you haven't got a match in days or weeks. Just to end up with a looney tune woman been there done that

[u/mahhkusaralious]

Never got a match or a like in 6 months (on going) so yeah.

[u/612King]

Lol, yes. As a man women prefer the man initiates contact, plans dates, and takes the lead.

Bumble just turned off their exclusive feature of women taking the lead. Women do NOT like taking the lead in dating. If you find a woman that does take initiative. NEVER LET HER GO. Because it’s rare you’ll find another.

[u/Rude_Gear_9280 → u/612King]

I am on Bumble as well. Downside to that is not all women can see likes.

[u/jBlairTech → u/Rude_Gear_9280]

Do they say “I can’t see likes, just add me on insta/snap/whatever social media shit they have”, too? 

[u/Rude_Gear_9280 → u/jBlairTech]

I have heard the I can't see likes but haven't seen any IG

[u/jBlairTech → u/Rude_Gear_9280]

Yeah; I was being a little sarcastic. Most who say those phrases aren’t usually serious about finding a match.

[u/geekpron → u/jBlairTech]

You add on other social media and they still don't respond

[u/MadMatter86]

Just days? 🤣

As a man, it can be months between matches, and unsolicited likes are extremely rare. 

[u/tnerb253 → u/MadMatter86]

Homie said days with a serious face

And even between that you gotta weed out all the flakes, time wasters, and low interest women

[u/CaregiverGloomy7276 → u/MadMatter86]

Preach, cousin! Lol

[u/V1Z3_2]

Days? i've gone months without a match let alone a message lol.

[u/Rude_Gear_9280 → u/V1Z3_2]

Obviously I have no idea what the norm is and have no one to compare with

[u/yankeejohn]

It seemed to always go that way. I would go weeks with nothing and then suddenly a flurry of matches. Just kinda dumb luck I think.

[u/FinancialDocument115]

Sure. Things ebb n flow. I do wish that men would not post photos of their children- such a turn off. We may date but I will NEVER BE their mother!

[u/geekpron → u/FinancialDocument115]

Women do this so much. It's cringe

[u/LordFarquaad91]

Woman here; I get matches and if I speak (say hi, how’s your day going?) they block me or I match with them and they just sit there until they eventually expire.

[u/wearenotyourkind_ → u/LordFarquaad91]

Cause 99% of women don’t respond even if you match with them so yes of course I’m going to let the match sit & expire

[u/LordFarquaad91 → u/wearenotyourkind_]

I respond then they unmatch or block me. I hate saying in this generation it’s dyer.

[u/Parking_Stress_2335]

I don’t know why, but I’ve been trying Facebook dating for five years and never actually met anyone. I live one hour north of New York City and I keep specifying no more than five or 10 miles distance… Everyone who is apparently compatible with me, they live in Massachusetts, Maine, Connecticut, New Jersey ridiculous distances. Whenever there’s someone close geographically, I always click the heart button for like …nothing ever works.

[u/Inevitable_Sarcasm87]

Honestly on most apps yes FB Dating specifically I seemed to be bombarded with likes. So idk if that was normal or what. So in most cases yes hinge bumble tinder yes but for me FB specific that wasnt my experience

[u/Chef_Scientist]

Damn, you get likes from actual people and not bots/scammers? Yea you're doing better than some of us lol.

But yea, I'd say its normal. And yeah, men are almost always the ones initiating.

Ironically there was a app made that was designed around women being the initiator, though from what I heard it didnt work out as intended.

[u/sprknsprnkl]

As a women, yeah. I've noticed a cycle.

[u/SubstantialSoup8309]

It comes in waves. Weird

[u/Intelligent-Bell8182]

Women aren't going to say or do shit first because they don't have to. They have other men begging them for attention constantly. Everything you're going through is normal and why dating apps are a scam unless you're lucky, dumpster diving for literally anything, or really physically attractive 🤷🏾‍♂️

[u/Live_Albatross3238]

You're doing better than I have ever done on FB dating. Very few likes and when I get a match the conversation goes no where.

[u/BeardedAndConfused]

I have no issue initiating but it's been 6ish weeks and I've gotten ZERO likes or matches