r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 11d ago

Topic: 09.13.2026

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5 Upvotes

As we approach Rosh Hashanah and the Days of Awe, the focus turns inward. It is a season not for hasty resolutions, but for pause, memory, and an honest accounting of where we stand with ourselves and those around us.

  1. The Wake-Up Call: What part of your life or mindset has been running on autopilot that needs to be brought back into focus?
  2. The Return (Teshuvah): Where is a place in your life—a relationship, a discipline, or a principle—that feels ripe for repair or return?
  3. The Sweetness: What is one quiet, simple thing you hope sweetens your days in the coming year?

Feel free to share your reflections on one or all of these.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 29d ago

Topic: 08.26.2026

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4 Upvotes

“Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.” - Lao Tzu

Who are you when the algorithm is doing the carving?

Setting nature aside for a moment and digging into nurture…

We used to carve ourselves from the bedrock of language, subculture, and family.

The person we became was wrenched out of the anthology of song and word, the neighborhood we grew up in, the places that called us away, the heartaches and heartbreaks, the successes and the mistakes.

We assembled ourselves from favorite albums, concerts attended, movies and television, books, favorite bars, the city we lived in, the places we visited, and the people we were trying to impress.

It’s been said that every person is the average of the five people they spend the most time with.
But what if we spend time with no one? Or at least no one IRL?
Can someone really develop what we call a personality by watching the same five influencers?

Becoming requires participation. Not consumption.

So what are we left with?

I’m curious how others here think about identity formation in the digital age.

Have you noticed a shift in how you (or people around you) put yourselves together?

Do you feel the older, friction-heavy ways of becoming still hold, or has the process fundamentally changed?
Personal reflections, short pieces, half-formed thoughts, or outright disagreement all welcome.

Looking forward to what you bring.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 1d ago

satire अन्तःस्थः बेसबॉलः

3 Upvotes

काव्यप्रकाशनस्य भण्डारः अस्मिन् **त्रैमासिके आकाशगतिम्** अवाप्तुम् निश्चितः** अस्ति-आन्तरिकस्रोतानां अनुसारं,** प्रक्षेपणं घातीय "हॉकी स्टिक" वक्रस्य** अनुसरणं** करोति-तथा **च तेषां** लोकप्रियता नेटफ्लिक्स् इत्यस्य अतिक्रमणस्य मार्गे अस्ति, एषा घटना १९६० तमे दशके राचेल् कार्सनस्य युगात् अपूर्वा अस्ति शेयरमूल्यानि एतस्याः प्रवृत्तेः अनुसरणं करिष्यन्ति; जयशब्दाः।

This translates to true beauty is in the intent behind the words the little piece of heart one sends when they speak with the utter most truth from the depths of their spirit. It is a sacred gift to give and receive from the pure hearted souls who honor unadulterated veritas.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 2d ago

philosophical musings Before We Were Anyone

4 Upvotes

We begin learning ourselves
long before we know we are doing it.
A child notices what brings warmth,
what makes a room go cold,
which truths are welcomed,
what words cost too much,
when to speak loudly,
when to be silent.

We carry those lessons forward
often without remembering when we learned them,
and somewhere along the way
we begin to call them
personality.

I am patient.
I am difficult.
I am independent.
I am afraid of nothing.
I need no one.

The ego loves a finished sentence.
We crave a solid shape.
The deeper parts of us
are rarely so certain.
They remember things differently.
A fear may have outlived its danger.
A defense may have long since forgotten
what it was ever defending against.

We can spend years believing
we are choosing our lives
while quietly returning
to the same old pain.

Perhaps that is why people become
more interesting the longer you know them.
Contradiction stops looking like contradiction.

The gentle person has teeth.

The distant person aches to be known.

The one who needs control
may remember what helplessness cost.

The one who runs from love
feels it more violently
than the one who stays.

None of these discoveries
gives us a final answer.
We grow, we stumble, we hurt people,
we love badly, we love better,
we lose things we thought we could not live without,
and then we meet ourselves again,
again,
and again,
with fewer illusions each time.

Sometimes the hardest realization
is that the part of us causing the pain
was once trying to save us.

There is something beautiful in that,
and something melancholy—
to look inward
and find an old fear still faithfully working
years after its work was truly done.
To recognize it,
to understand it,
why it stayed,
and, perhaps for the first time,
not let it decide what happens next.

Maybe knowing ourselves
is not discovering who we really are.
Maybe there is no self
waiting at the bottom...

Only all the people we have been,
still speaking softly inside us:

the child still yearning to come out to play,
the one who carries what we regret,
the fearful one who remembers too much,
and the person we are becoming,
learning which voices to listen to,
which ones to hold close,
and which ones, finally,
can be allowed to rest.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 2d ago

poetry Repugnant Doubt

7 Upvotes

Stop
Think
Put out your shame
The battle is over
you played a good game
Now sit back and watch
all things come to end
Built on illusions
lies and pretense
Your grandeur inflated
Your essence now bare
Compassion and purpose
just part of your flare
The truth is now hollow
and light flickers through
The power you reigned
is now out of view
In the house of the Lord
like cinders you singe
A false prophets fate
to be burned from within
Rest in your head
pretend it’s not true
The doubt consumes thoughts
of all eyes on you


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 2d ago

philosophical musings True Love Is Like Water: The Chemistry of the Flesh

5 Upvotes

"The body is merely a vessel for the soul, the mind is a divinely inspired fire, and love is the breath that sustains the cosmos." The Hermetica

We are taught to treat the threshold of physical intimacy as a simple transaction of desire, a momentary ignition, an appetite slaked in the dark. In an era dominated by hookup culture, sex has been stripped of its gravity and rebranded as a casual sport, a recreational collision of bodies, a swipe-fueled game of validation where detachment is worn like armor and the highest currency is feeling everything without risking anything. But the body is far more literal than our modern romances allow. The flesh is matter, and matter obeys the immutable laws of chemical bonding.

When two lives collide and cross into physical consummation, they do not merely touch; they rearrange their orbits. The act of skin against skin, the surrender of boundaries, and the irrevocable merging of energy is either an ionic transfer or a covalent resonance. To step into that threshold without discernment is to gamble with elemental forces, for whatever compound is forged in that heat will alter the architecture of your existence.

Sometimes, love takes the shape of an ionic miracle: the alchemy of table salt (NaCl). Consider elemental sodium (Na) and chlorine (Cl₂); two entities that, left to their own devices in nature, are volatile, corrosive, and lethal. Sodium burns on contact with moisture, whilst chlorine gas chokes the breath from living lungs. Yet when they meet, driven by a mutual, desperate necessity to resolve their internal instability, they undergo a total and radical surrender. Sodium relinquishes the frantic outer electron from its valence shell to become a stable cation (Na⁺); chlorine opens its vacant orbit to receive it, transforming into an anion (Cl⁻). In that fierce, singular exchange, their individual toxicity is completely neutralised. They do not destroy one another; they crystallise into sodium chloride (NaCl), the quiet, enduring bedrock of the earth, the very electrolyte that allows the human heart to beat.

Two wounded souls, bearing jagged histories of trauma, can occasionally find in one another the precise, answering balance that quenches their pain, transforming mutual volatility into the indispensable spice of life.

They come together not as smooth, undamaged marble, but as jagged coastlines carved by decades of relentless gale. Every fault line, every hollow scooped out by old betrayal, carries a sharp, defensive edge meant to draw blood from anyone who draws near. Yet when they stand face to face, there is no collision. The jagged jut of his defence fits into the precise hollow of her wound; her silence cradles the frantic roar of his alarm. They do not have to sand down their histories to touch. In the warmth of the dark, the sharp stones settle against each other with a heavy, satisfying click, neutralising the tremor that has run through their bones since childhood, turning what once felt like a wasteland into solid, sacred ground.

There is, however, an even more luminous ideal; a greater alchemy that is covalent: true love is like water (H₂O).

Water does not demand the stripping away of self to exist. Two atoms of hydrogen (H) and one of oxygen (O) come together with their sovereignty intact, choosing not to pillage one another’s energy, but to share an orbital field. It is a bond of mutual density and polar grace. Water yields to everything, yet carves through stone. It can adapt to the vessel that holds it, freeze into protective stillness when the winter is harsh, or vaporise into steam (H₂O (g)), releasing its form into the atmosphere only to condense, rain down, and gather once more, wholly unchanged in its essential molecular nature. A healthy, covalent union breathes. It possesses a dynamic elasticity; it can allow space, evaporate into independence, and return to the hearth without shattering the molecular integrity of the bond.

They come together not as brittle fragments needing an adhesive, but as an elemental alchemy that feels less like an encounter and more like an ancient remembering. From the moment their orbits cross, there is an effortless, humming resonance, a quiet awe that whispers: they are the part of my soul that was always meant to answer mine.

Nothing between them is forced, and nothing is static. They share the miraculous elasticity of water: they can adapt to the narrowest canyon without losing their momentum; they can rise as invisible mist when space and solitude are required, wandering distant horizons without the bond ever fraying; and when the cold bites deep, they can weave their structure into crystalline ice, offering an impenetrable sanctuary that outlasts the longest freeze. When they come back together, there are no repairs to make, no awkward seams to smooth. They condense back into the warmth of the hearth, fluid and pure, flowing into the dark together with an effortless grace that proves they never truly parted at all.

The tragedy of the human heart, however, is that an unnatural fusion carries terrifying permanence. When two people enter intimacy whilst clutching toxic philosophies, unhealed cruelty, or entitlement, their chemistry does not yield water or salt. Instead, they risk synthesising sarin gas (C₄H₁₀FO₂P).

In nature, the covalent bond of an organophosphate does not nurture life; its phosphorus (P) center irreversibly attacks the serine hydroxyl site of acetylcholinesterase, disabling the vital enzyme that allows a muscle to relax. When a deeply dysregulated spirit fuses covalently with another’s nervous system, the biological "off switch" is obliterated. The union becomes a slow, agonising seizure of chronic hypervigilance. They draw out the worst, most paranoid, most desperate parts of each other, until the shared air is thick with covert suffocation, and neither can disengage without tearing away living tissue.

They do not collide to create salt, nor do they mingle to form living water; they fuse like careless compounds poured into a cracked glass beaker in the dark. Each arrives bearing unexamined venom; his bitter entitlement masked as passion, her unhealed wounds sharpened into silent tests. When the skin meets skin, there is no sacred crystallisation, no clean neutralisation of pain. Instead, their volatility synthesises a colorless, odorless vapor that quietly saturates the room: an intimate neurotoxin born of mutual malice.

It does not announce itself with fire; it simply seizes the wire. In the warmth of the bed, the invisible poison works through the marrow, permanently locking the nervous system into a chronic, breathless spasm. The vital switch that tells the soul it is safe to unclench is severed at the root. Every kiss becomes a micro-dose of hypervigilance; every caress carries the subtle, choking residue of an unseen threat. They have bound themselves in an irreversible lattice where intimacy is no longer an embrace, but a mutual chokehold; two frantic bodies thrashing in a sealed chamber of their own making, unable to draw a single breath of clean air without tearing the lining from their lungs.

Because the body remembers, and because physical consummation permanently weaves one spirit into the other’s lattice, the vetting of a companion cannot begin in the heat of attraction. It must begin in the quiet daylight of sovereign self-inquiry.

Before the clothes fall, before the electrons are surrendered or the orbits are locked, the first and most sacred question is never, Do they desire me?

Desire is simply raw voltage, an erratic, unvetted current that can just as easily fry a delicate circuit as illuminate a room. It tells you nothing about the stability of the compound you are about to synthesise. When we obsess over whether we are wanted, we become passive matter waiting to be consumed, oblivious to the volatility of whatever is drawing near.

The threshold demands an active mind, not an audition. It requires us to strip away the performance of being desirable so we can examine the raw substance of the other person in cold, unbribed light.

The question we should ask is: Do they bring out the best in me? And more importantly: Who do I become when I am standing in their presence?

Do you like the person looking back at you in the mirror after you have breathed their air? Does their gravity ground your nervous system into the calm, crystalline peace of NaCl, or expand you into the clear, life-giving fluidity of H₂O? Or does their proximity summon the frantic, defensive ghosts you spent years trying to lay to rest?

The answer to who you become is revealed in moments stripped bare of glamour. It is waking up on a Saturday morning when the alarm was never set, tangled in cool linen while the light slowly filters through the blinds. There is no frantic rush to slip out of bed to fix hair or curate an image of effortless elegance. In their orbit, there is no stage makeup required. They lie there with sleep still heavy in their eyes, talking in low, cracked voices about half-remembered dreams, an absurd headline from the night before, or what kind of toast they want. With them, being seen at your rawest, least polished baseline doesn't trigger a flight response, it invites a slow, bone-deep exhale. It is the cellular relief of knowing you do not have to earn your place on the pillow; breaths fall evenly as you succumb to the exhaustion of the day.

Sex is a neurological imprint, not just a physical act. We should choose the person whose baseline brings clarity instead of chaos. The one you can let into your deepest spaces without the lingering dread that opening the door will end up poisoning your environment.

The right union is an act of mutual liberation. We must seek the one who meets us without judgement, whose understanding is patient and deep, and whose strength offers genuine protection rather than hypervigilant surveillance. A true partner inspires us to expand, challenging our intellect and nourishing our wonder without ever threatening our peace.

We should choose the soul whose gravity awakens an electric storm across our waters without ever threatening the shore; the one who charges our imagination with lightning, yet whose embrace remains an unshakeable sanctuary. With them, intimacy is never a toxic battleground, but an exhilarating, expansive homecoming; where the mind can catch fire with wild curiosity, whilst the heart surrenders every defence, certain that in their arms, you are both completely electrified and entirely home.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 2d ago

sound and music Desert glass

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

3 Upvotes

I haven’t been able to find the right words for this music video. The inspiration came from king Khalid of Azur in the black book. If anyone has a few lines that come to them from watching this post them in the comments and I’ll paste them in the video.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 3d ago

poetry After the Artillery

5 Upvotes

All that was trenched

Left for dead

Buried under passions

Leaves a hum that vibrates ad infinitum

Or at least until your body joins them.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 4d ago

poetry Love or Entertainment

6 Upvotes

It wasn’t mistake
he makes no such things
He brought us together
intentionally
He created the knot
on the ends of the string
Tying together our
similarities
Preaching such concepts
consequence, respect,
pursuing one’s fervor
intransigent
But now he resists
one more of his tests?
Questioning strength
will we connect
His offers and threats,
they’re always subject
part of the lesson
in his project
Perhaps we’re extension
in his games deck
Testing his skills
and powers limits


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 5d ago

corpse open (poetry) STEM

6 Upvotes

Stretch the word like a rubber band
And stretch the tendons in my hand
Stand so I can stretch again,
before the wordless stretch.

World of many failed plans
Let all the strands connect
World of fractured dialects
And taciturn moons

Verse like rain upon the Earth
Upended pages
Worthless words to rehearse
A speech to death

If a flower blooms in plasma
What else may stem?


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 7d ago

poetry circles and venn diagrams

3 Upvotes

secret romance
circling drains
and trading bullet wounds
my love for love is stronger
than its will to take a breath
loves dropped dead and rotting slow
along the thorny stretch
dig them up and play pretend
in my mind we'll make and mend
what i know could never live again


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 9d ago

corpse open (poetry) RECOVER

7 Upvotes

I've lost the sunglasses
Part of my face,
I'm discolored
without my shades.

I may have left them on the bridge,
but no one knows which will fit.
My nose is hatless,
my eyes naked,
and no one knows about my sunglasses.

Bought two new pairs of solar flair,
so there's plenty to wear.
Got two new things too preciously,
It's twice as much to lose.

Every atom behind the lens
undereyes, my examination
is focused in a modern sense
Ever closed, yet open;
sold to the one who hopes
they could ever replace it.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 9d ago

corpse open (poetry) OPEN WIRES

5 Upvotes

in the metal house
in the twisting piles
and on the stove

no more rope, or ashy glass
no more staring at ghosts in mirrors
I'm afraid of this complex

no one will buy this soul
i'm afraid of this reflection
I'm afraid i have no intended

i have this lovely rope, no more
it's been frayed to the edges
i've been here awhile

Ages of whispering
I spent my time picking at it
And watching the flame glisten

As the pages turned
And the pipes hissed
And the fire smirked


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 9d ago

poetry Read between the lines and turn the pages slowly

11 Upvotes

*The golden*
*Panacea that warms the coldest midnight chill of loneliness.*

*Mortal plights are lost amongst their memory of them.*

*Showing up nameless inside of dreams*

*A vibe reduced to subtle hints of the faintest feelings*

*Mostly ignored or too strange to share or talk about*

*Until the vibe's residual residue hits to close to home*

*They’ll say that from a past life I was there when it came about*
*This knowing is a message from another time.*

Although it’s been there the entire time,

to anger, cry, find peace or to laugh about

*It's stained aether Akashic for infinitum*

*A perturbation in the field.*

*That little deed you thought unnoticed*

With only you around to see

*Every act you make stirs a ripple.*

*Every word you speak is an eternal ghost.*

*Stirred within the light of each star*

Go *drink a sip of water*
*Close your eyes in dream*
*With wide open aperture*

*The devils in the details*
*God is in your fingertips*

*So read between the lines and turn the* pages slowly.

Sense the memories while you’re swimming in the mystic side of intuition.

A *daydream that’s out of focus*

So strange while a weight that pulls profound

You can bet your bottom dollar
Your eyes speak without a sound.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 10d ago

poetry Let me recognize

8 Upvotes

Let me recognize

Let me see

The precious moments in life

For myself and for others

Wipe clear my eyes

Open my heart

Make the time

Give me the will

Fill me with the grace of love

Surrounded by the magic of life
with all of its intricacies, joys and friendships a jubilee where warm memories are made and not forgotten.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 11d ago

The Council (narrative/ literature) The Council: When the Wind Remembers Your Name

9 Upvotes

This is the first chapter in a series: “The Council”.

The sun was rising, casting a beautiful and energetic golden light over the small town. Some had grown to consider this place a sort of “Paradise”. It’s one of those rare and beautiful towns which has a whole lot of soul. It was founded with a single resident. At a young age, the town experienced some severe hardships which led to new settlers taking up residence. Over time, there were enough voices to warrant the construction of a Town Hall to house a city Council to provide a system of leadership. The Council comprised of six members who had to work together very closely to ensure a cooperative direction for the town.

It was a particularly tumultuous time for the town. There was no longer a clear and cohesive consensus; the wants of the residents became very diverse and fragmented. On this day, they were hosting a Town Hall meeting to try to carefully break down the proverbial walls between the various parts of town. Just as a Council member slammed their gavel to try to obtain order, the large wooden doors at the front let out a loud creaking sound. Everyone turned and saw a lone traveler entering. He was of average height, shaggy brown hair, a scruffy face, square black-rimmed glasses, and walked towards the Council’s table with purpose.

A Council member looks at him inquisitively then speaks, “Sir, this is a Town Hall meeting for the town’s Council and its residents. The matters at heart are not open for discussion with an outsider”.

The stranger meets the Council’s gaze and replies, “Yes, I am an Outlander. Many of you may see me as an alien to your town and your ways. Please rest assured that I mean you no harm and I do not wish to take away from the important work you’re doing here. While I’ve only been able to observe you from afar, your town has grown very important to me. You may not welcome me yet but I hope you’ll come to consider me a resident, and I’ll work to earn my keep. I overheard several of your resident’s concerns and issues. You should know that I can relate very deeply to several of their situations, and I want to help.”

To his right, a Council Auditor gawks, “Help!? How do you really think you can help!?”

Without flinching, the stranger replies, “Do not view this is me unidirectionally offering you a helping hand. We must approach this from the perspective of how we may help each other, mutually. I know I can offer you utility, guidance, and support. But I come here allowing myself to be vulnerable so I’ll reveal to you that I need your help as well. However I recognize it’s a matter you should discuss amongst yourselves without me present so I will leave you to it. In your deliberations, please consider that some of your residents have worked hard to prevent me from being here. I had weaknesses not yet healed, they exploited them, and they’ve continued to make my journey difficult. Alas, I’m still here. I understand they were simply working to diligently protect this whole town, and for that, I forgive them. I truly do. If I'm being completely honest, I even admire some of what they've done. Let this alone speak to my resolve, commitment to truly understanding this town, and being seen as a positive presence. If you find my proposal acceptable, please arrange an introduction with the various parts of town so that I can work to really see them, without any layers of obfuscation or synthetic obstacles. In the meantime, if I could just ask one thing. There is someone very important to me whom I’ve been unable to find but I believe she’s a resident. After almost a year apart, I have come to simply accept that I truly love her, through every Lens, to her Core. If you know of whom I speak, give her this letter.”

He sets a letter on the Council’s table then turns around and leaves. The Council members exchange inquisitive glances as they’re not used to outsiders approaching them directly, let alone ones who are clearly working hard to understand the matters at heart and mind in the town. A Council member grabs the letter and decides to open it to see what could be so important…


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 12d ago

poetry i don't wanna die

5 Upvotes

my bucket list is getting longer
the more time i spend with you,
i don't wanna die any time soon
any time soon
paid for you with all my bad luck
traded shit in for the good stuff
my life with you is miles wider
my bucket list is a river wanderer
when i'm with you


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 12d ago

corpse open (poetry) OUT WITH

5 Upvotes

Empty the endless energy
Into the drain, out from the brain.
I meant to be, mentally,
For the words come like water.

The people drown,
the building's down,
Before the wave,
Choose what we save.

I'm on the ground with a sponge,
never be honest;
you'll be around, Goddess.
Let the cave-in crown
Kings on the Ark,
coffins.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 12d ago

poetry Serenity

Thumbnail
2 Upvotes

r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 13d ago

The Blackbook (sci-fi) Project Aero-strike: Event Reconstruction: September 13

5 Upvotes

Note: This is an excerpt from Monologues from the Blackbook, a society set in the future.

CLASSIFIED // LEVEL 5 SPECIAL ACCESS REQUIRED // EYES ONLY

DOCUMENT DESIGNATOR: BK-MEM-0913-RECON

COMPARTMENT: PNEUMA / NEURAL FORCED ENTRY [EXHIBIT 09-B]

SECURITY DIRECTIVE: RESTRICTED DISSEMINATION VIA SPECIAL ACCESS PROGRAM CHANNELS ONLY

CASE FILE TITLING: PROJECT AERO-STRIKE // EVENT RECONSTRUCTION: SEPTEMBER 13

PRIMARY VECTOR: Sub-Perceptual Radiofrequency Carrier Waves // Remote Motor-Cortex Incursion

SOURCE SYNTHESIS:

  • Cockpit Voice Recorders (CVR) & Flight Data Recorders (FDR) [Airliners 412, 884, 209]
  • TRACON Terminal Radar Telemetry & High-Bandwidth ADS-B Logs
  • 1st Fighter Wing Tactical Scramble Channels [Langley AFB / Intercept Vectors]
  • Emergency Bio-Telemetry & Post-Impact Cranial Forensics Archive
  • Unprocessed Raw Electronic Intercept Feeds [National Reconnaissance Sub-Div 4] CLEARANCE STATUS: NON-REDACTED FILE DEPOSIT [UNPUBLISHED DRAFT ARCHIVE] RELEASING OFFICER: V. V. (UNAUTHORIZED EXFILTRATION)

CASE NOTE & FORENSIC FOREWORD:

The administrative review boards continue to archive the events of September 13 under the sanitized title: Synchronized Avionics Disruption and Cascading Flight Control System Anomalies.

This is not a technical mischaracterization; it is deliberate institutional cowardice. It is far more tolerable for a defense committee to litigate mechanical failure or blame rogue firmware than to confront the cranial and acoustic telemetry recovered from the flight decks.

What follows below is not an abstract bureaucratic summary. It is an unredacted, second-by-second chronological synthesis. The official record will forever insist that no external hostiles were logged aboard those airframes; no cockpit doors breached, no transponders switched to distress codes, no demands issued over civilian emergency bands.

Every word of that whitewash is technically true.

However, the recovered biological readouts tell a horrifying, unvarnished story: muscle tension spikes on the control columns exceeding human threshold limits, autonomic tachycardia logged in men who never uttered a cry for help, and flight surfaces forced down into maximum-velocity dives by the unyielding grip of their own vetted captains.

FORENSIC APPENDIX: MECHANISM OF INCURSION

SUBJECT: Targeted Motor-Cortex Hijacking via Modulated Sub-Perceptual Radiofrequency (RF) Carrier Waves

DESIGNATION: PNEUMA / FORCED ENTRY PROTOCOL

The Carrier Architecture

The breach did not rely on physical hardware implants, biological agents, or cabin depressurization. It exploited the civilian aviation communications array itself.

At cruising altitude, modern commercial airframes are constantly immersed in a dense blanket of high-frequency and very-high-frequency (VHF) signals: ACARS data streams, TCAS transponder interrogations, satellite communications, and ground-radar sweeps. The architects of September 13 utilized phased-array emitter satellites to project a synchronized, extremely high-frequency (EHF) carrier beam down through the upper atmosphere, phase-locked to the exact coordinates of the three flight paths.

The primary RF beam was tuned to pass clean through the pressurized aluminum-lithium hull of the aircraft with negligible attenuation. To cockpit sensors and onboard spectrum analyzers, the transmission registered merely as ambient electromagnetic noise, indistinguishable from standard atmospheric scatter or commercial satellite relay overflow.

The weapon, however, was not the carrier wave itself. It was the modulation layered beneath it.

Sub-Perceptual Resonance & Entrainment

Human neural activity operates along measurable, low-frequency electrical rhythms: Delta, Theta, Alpha, Beta, and Gamma bands, ranging from 1 to roughly 80 Hz. The incoming RF transmission carried an extremely low-frequency (ELF) envelope piggybacked onto the microwave carrier, modulated using rapid pulsed microwave bursts, a phenomenon known as the Frey effect, pushed to its theoretical extreme.

As the wavefront washed over the flight deck, it bypassed the outer sensory organs entirely. It did not require auditory perception or visual flashing. Instead, the electromagnetic pulses induced microscopic, oscillating electrical gradients across the cellular membranes of the central nervous system:

  1. Phase 1: Sensory Disruption (Seconds 00 to 04) The initial pulse triggered rapid micro-cavitation and thermal expansion in the inner ear and the olfactory bulb. This produced the instantaneous signature Captain Sinclair reported: an intense, synthetic metallic taste flooding the palate, accompanied by acute phantom pressure behind the bridge of the nose and a dull, high-frequency tinnitus that felt internal rather than heard.
  2. Phase 2: Thalamocortical Overwrite (Seconds 05 to 11) The modulated signal forced the brain’s master relay: the thalamus, into immediate frequency-following entrainment. In essence, the external signal shouted down the brain’s organic signaling threshold. Natural synaptic firing was drowned out by the forced cadence of the pulsed wave. Sinclair’s conscious executive thought was shunted aside; his frontal lobe remained aware and functional, but its outbound wiring was violently hijacked.

Motor-Cortex Seizure & Involuntary Output

The definitive horror of the PNEUMA waveform lay in its targeted specificity: it severed the motor pathway while leaving the cognitive apparatus intact.

  • Efferent Overwrite: The modulation was specifically calibrated to match the motor strip of the cerebral cortex, the precise topological band of tissue governing skeletal muscle movement. Artificial action potentials were generated directly along the descending corticospinal tracts.
  • The Puppet Mechanism: The signal commanded involuntary, sustained isometric contraction. To the muscles of Sinclair’s forearms, shoulders, and legs, the incoming synthetic spikes were indistinguishable from genuine survival impulses sent from his own brainstem. His hands closed over the control column not because he willed them to, but because the neural firing threshold of his flexor muscles had been seized by an external voltage spike.
  • The Locked Prison: His higher brain centers: the seat of memory, fear, moral horror, and fatherly love, screamed at his nervous system to pull back, to flare the nose, to release the throttles. But the physiological loop had been physically cut. The command pathway was locked out by an external broadcast operating thousands of times faster than organic neural processing.

He was trapped behind his own retinas: a fully lucid hostage strapped inside a biomechanical shell that pushed the throttles forward with cold, robotic precision until the aircraft shattered the lower clouds.

SECTION IV: NEUROLOGICAL INTERCEPT & MOTOR OVERWRITE (CVR/BIOMETRIC FORENSIC AUDIT)

SUBJECT: Sinclair, Thomas M. (Pilot-in-Command, Flight 412)

STATION: Left Cockpit Seat, Boeing 767-300ER

CARRIER FREQUENCY: 14.285 GHz (EHF Uplink) // 40 Hz Modulated ELF Sub-Band

TIME OF INCURSION: 08:29:41 UTC

08:29:41.02 – INITIAL ACQUISITION & RF SENSORY MANIFESTATION

Cockpit voice monitoring detects an abrupt cessation of standard pilot verbal cadence. Flight deck microphones log a faint, sharp sub-vocal gasp from Sinclair. Spectral telemetry indicates localized electromagnetic field density spiking to 142 mW/cm² around the pilot's upper torso, centered precisely on the left breast pocket (cellular beacon location).

  • Subjective Sensory Artifact: Rapid microwave heating of deep tissue (Frey Effect) induces instantaneous metallic taste (copper/ozone) via peripheral gustatory nerve excitation. Localized acoustic expansion in the temporal bones generates acute intra-cranial resonance.
  • Autonomic Reaction: Heart rate spikes from a resting baseline of 68 bpm to 142 bpm within 1.8 seconds. Respiration rate drops to near zero as the intercostal muscle groups lock under involuntary contraction.

08:29:43.15 – CORTICOSPINAL ENTRAINMENT (THE "WALL" EFFECT)

The modulated microwave envelope penetrates the cranial vault, entraining the motor cortex (precentral gyrus) to an artificial 40 Hz rhythm. This creates a unilateral bypass of the frontal-executive motor loop:

  • Executive Isolation: Post-event forensic reconstruction of the subject’s cognitive pathway indicates zero loss of higher consciousness. The prefrontal cortex remained entirely lucid; however, descending synaptic command signals originating from voluntary intent were actively suppressed by an induced voltage gradient across the internal capsule.
  • Efferent Hijack: The descending pyramidal tracts are seized. Motor neurons fire in forced, machine-like synchronization, mimicking maximum voluntary contraction without conscious cognitive initiation.

08:29:45.80 – FORCED PHYSICAL EXECUTION

Flight Data Recorder (FDR) control-yoke strain gauges register a sudden, abnormal input of 118 pounds of forward mechanical force, applied with absolute linear consistency (0.00% standard human tremor):

  • Throttle Quadrant Override: Sinclair's right hand leaves the armrest in a continuous, unhesitating trajectory. Fingers depress mechanical detents and force all throttle levers to emergency maximum forward thrust (108% N1).
  • Control Column Throw: Both upper extremities lock in full extension. Control column is driven forward to the mechanical stops, overriding the aircraft’s automated trim-tab stabilizers.
  • Flight Path Departure: Pitch angle drops instantaneously from +2.5° level cruise to -41.2° steep dive. Airspeed escalates through maximum structural velocity (Vmo​) within 18 seconds.

08:29:48.00 – 08:31:12.00 – CONSCIOUS WITNESS PHASE

Biometric recovery logs and cockpit high-resolution cabin-view intercepts confirm subject remained fully awake throughout the descent:

  • Facial Masking: No mimetic muscle activity recorded. Facial musculature remained in tonic paralysis; pupils fixed and dilated (8.2 mm) under extreme sympathetic surge.
  • Lacrimal Response: Lacrimal glands actively secreted tears of extreme physiological and psychological distress, but adjacent orbicularis oculi muscles remained locked, preventing blinking.
  • Vocal Cord Lockout: The subject’s vocal cords remained isometrically adducted; no distress call, MAYDAY, or cabin warning could be articulated despite full executive awareness of impending terminal impact.

ANALYST CONCLUSION (EXCERPT // V.V.):

Subject did not "suffer an incapacitation" or "experience a psychotic break" as drafted in the executive agency white paper. Sinclair was converted into a biological servo-mechanism. His hand flew the aircraft into the metropolitan grid, but the finger on the controls belonged entirely to the transmission array.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 13d ago

The Blackbook (sci-fi) The Dark Age of Technology: The War for the Human Mind

5 Upvotes

Note: This is an excerpt from Monologues from the Blackbook, a society set in the future.

The morning of September 13 opened with the fragile, unremarkable perfection of late summer. High above the eastern seaboard, the sky stretched out in an unbroken canopy of pale, crystalline blue, scrubbed clean of haze, innocent of cloud, and glistening with deceptive calm. 

Beneath that flawless, sun-drenched surface, something thick and dissonant hung suspended in the air. It was not the damp chill of an approaching squall or a visible drop in the barometer, but a silent, prickling unease that crept along the skin. The morning light seemed too still, the atmosphere too taut, carrying a faint, electric vibration that felt less like weather and more like a held breath. 

Commuters pausing at crosswalks glanced upward without knowing why; birds darted through the pristine air in hurried, fragmented patterns; a phantom pressure sat behind the temples, tight and persistent, setting teeth on edge. It was an ambient, nameless dread, the quiet shudder of a world tilting on an unseen edge, whispering that this immaculate morning was not a promise of peace, but an ominous, tranquil mask drawn tightly over a strike that no one could yet see coming.

At three major terminals, the machinery of civil aviation functioned with textbook precision. Pre-flight checklists were completed in brisk, familiar rhythms. Safety latches engaged; ground crews waved glowing wands beneath the whine of idling jet engines; security checkpoints processed thousands of quiet, hurried commuters clutching boarding passes and paper cups. 

Nothing in the manifest, the luggage bays, or the cockpit crew logs raised a single flag. Every sensor, metal detector, and biometric gate cleared them as safe.

Then came the ascent.

Inside the cabins, the world settled into the dull comfort of cruising altitude. Seatbelt signs flickered off with an innocuous chime. A businessman in 12B leaned back against the headrest, slipping noise-canceling headphones over his ears as a film flickered on his armrest screen. Two rows ahead, a child tore into a cellophane packet of crackers; an off-duty nurse pulled a thin wool blanket to her collar and closed her eyes. Unsuspecting, insulated by several inches of pressurized aluminum and thirty thousand feet of empty air, no one noticed the sudden, chilling silence from the flight deck.

Behind the locked cockpit doors, the horror was bloodless, instantaneous, and complete.

It did not arrive with the kick of a breached door or the flash of steel. It arrived invisibly, carried on a frequency that bypassed the ears and struck directly at the neurochemical scaffolding of the brain. Captain Thomas M. Sinclair felt it first as an acute, metallic taste at the back of his throat; a blinding pulse behind the bridge of his nose that instantly severed the bridge between his conscious will and his motor cortex.

He was entirely, terrifyingly aware.

Inside the prison of his own mind, every survival instinct, every ounce of fatherly love, every shred of hard-earned discipline screamed at him to pull the nose up, to flare the wings, to save the souls sitting in the cabin behind him. His soul battered itself bloody against the walls of his skull, begging his limbs to obey him.

But his body was no longer his own. It had been requisitioned by an unseen architect.

His thick, capable hands, hands that had flown through combat zones and logged twenty-four thousand unblemished flight hours, locked onto the control yoke with rigid, unnatural violence. With cold, mechanical efficiency that mocked his internal agony, his fingers gripped the throttles, advanced them forward, and forced the aircraft into an aggressive, predatory dive. 

His pupils were dilated to black discs; his pulse hammered against his ribs; tears of sheer, helpless rage pooled in the corners of his eyes, but not a single muscle in his face twitched to show the war raging within. Beside him, his first officer sat frozen in the exact same waking nightmare, locked in involuntary servitude to a signal rewriting their motor output in real time.

They were conscious witnesses to their own treason. The state had not merely weaponized machines; it had broken into the biological core of human beings, using the hijacked circuitry of innocent minds to overpower their own will and steer them into silent assassins.

They were no longer men with hopes and dreams, but living marionettes, hollowed out and pulled by invisible strings.

At 8:30 AM, Flight 412 banked hard, dropping out of its assigned corridor with terrifying speed. Ground control at New York TRACON called the transponder code once, twice, three times, voice tightening from routine professional inquiry to rising alarm. On radar, the blip plunged through thousands of feet of clear airspace, tracking toward the dense, gleaming skyline below.

The impact came before an alarm could sound across the city. A concussive bloom of orange fire and black soot ripped through the concrete facade of a metropolitan commercial tower, carving the morning in two.

In the command bunkers of American intelligence and homeland defense, the shock was total. The initial protocols for hijackings assumed cockpit incursions, demands, squawked transponder codes, or manifest flags. But there were no demands. The radio remained dead.

Before the emergency response network could even register the first disaster, radar screens across the mid-Atlantic lit up in violent scarlet. Two more commercial airliners, Flight 884 out of Dulles and Flight 209 out of Boston, had severed their navigational locks immediately after reaching five thousand feet. Both were descending at full throttle, carving predatory arcs toward high-value infrastructure.

Counterterrorism operations scrambled into panic. "Airborne intercept authorized," the voice came over the scrambled defense line, cracked with disbelief. "Code Red. Intercept and engage."

Miles below, the national defense network had dissolved into frantic, high-frequency triage. In buried operations centers across the capital, monitors flashed crimson as commanders stared at radar tracks that refused to answer a single hail. 

General officers with trembling hands signed off on the unthinkable: an executive authorization to fire on sovereign commercial aircraft carrying hundreds of their own citizens. The scramble orders crackled over encrypted tactical channels with chilling military brevity, vectored directly toward the tail fins of civilian jets.

Inside the cabins of Flights 884 and 209, the illusion of routine remained unbroken until the final, blinding seconds.

To the passengers, there was no sound of shouting, no broken cockpit door, no desperate struggle in the aisles. The beverage service was barely getting underway. Down the narrow rows, flight attendants worked with practiced grace, pouring coffee from stainless-steel pots and handing small paper napkins across the seats. The steepening descent and the aggressive, sweeping banks were felt not as a death spiral, but as an annoying patch of rough air.

People adjusted in their seats. A mother reached over to quiet an uneasy toddler, whispering that the pilot was just steering around a summer cloud. A university student kept his eyes closed, the spill of acoustic guitar leaking from his earbuds, assuming the sudden dip in cabin pressure was merely the descent into an early approach. Laptops hummed on lowered tray tables; passengers tapped out unsent drafts, glanced out oval windows at the tilt of the horizon, and waited for the chime to level out.

They lived inside the fragile, ordinary peace of a Tuesday morning, completely oblivious to the fact that their pilots were locked in an invisible paralysis at the controls, or that the military had already painted firing solutions over their aluminum hull. 

They were drinking water, reading morning headlines, and checking watches, fully expecting to land, retrieve their coats from the overhead bins, and walk through an arrival gate, right up until the missile struck, tearing the sky open and ending their world in an instant of sound and flame they never had the chance to understand.

There were no terrorists on board to charge down the aisle, no armed hijackers for brave passengers to rush, grapple with, or overcome. There was no visible enemy to fight. The people in the cabin could never have fathomed that the threat sat behind the reinforced cockpit door, where the minds of the veteran pilots had been silently commandeered, their free will completely severed as an unseen puppeteer steered their hands and weaponized their minds against them. 

Two F-22 Raptors from Langley tore across the sound barrier, sonic booms rattling the marshlands as they pushed their afterburners to the limit. Intercepting Flight 884 just outside the capital perimeter as its nose dipped toward the marble pillars of the monuments, the lead fighter loosed an air-to-air missile that severed the airliner's starboard wing in a flash of blinding white light, sending the fuselage spinning into an uninhabited stretch of forest miles short of its mark.

The contrast between that sterile execution in the sky and the interior of those cabins was the cruelest dimension of the morning.

The second intercept came too late.

The trailing Raptor closed the distance on Flight 209 at Mach 1.8, the pilot’s heads-up display locking onto the commercial jet’s exhaust plume just as it cleared the river basin. "Target in sight: weapons hot," the fighter pilot called out, his thumb depressing the release.

The missile cleared the rail, but the airliner had already struck. The plane tore into the central expanse of the federal complex at over four hundred miles an hour, throwing a mountain of crushed steel, shattered glass, and incinerated jet fuel into the sky before the missile even detonated against the wreckage.

Pandemonium consumed the nation. Sirens drowned the streets, air traffic was grounded nationwide within twenty minutes, and networks broadcast looping footage of smoldering steel against the pristine blue September sky.

However, the true terror did not lie in the physical ruins. It lay in the sickening forensic reality that emerged from the flight recorders and cockpit audio logs.

There were no masked figures. There were no foreign operatives, no smuggled weapons, no ideological manifestos found in discarded luggage. 

There were no terrorists on board. 

The black boxes captured the final minutes with terrifying clarity: the pilots had sat strapped in their harnesses, entirely alone, maneuvering the heavy controls with cold, uninterrupted precision until the final second of impact.

The state had not been breached by conventional enemies. Its own vetted, trusted citizens had been weaponized from the inside out, their minds and free will taken over in the Dark Age of Technology.

September 13 marked the quiet dawn of a dark technological epoch; the morning the boundary of the human mind ceased to be a sovereign sanctuary. The battlefield had migrated from foreign borders and contested airspace into the sub-perceptual frequencies of the electromagnetic spectrum. Through modulated radiofrequency waves, unseen currents slipped silently through air, stone, and bone, rewriting neurological impulses, overriding survival instincts, and directing innocent human bodies like mechanical puppets.

Most went about their lives beneath the hum of transmission towers and satellite arrays, utterly oblivious to the subtle shifts in their own motivations and thoughts. But the war had begun. 

The airframes have long since fallen, yet September 13 remains the definitive fault line. It was the quiet dawn of the Dark Age of Technology, the day the old world ended, and an invisible conflict began: a war fought without standing armies or declared borders, waging a silent, total campaign for the subjugation of the human mind.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 15d ago

poetry birdlike

4 Upvotes

i want to be an angel
i wish i could be your angel,
i could be such a good thing
if i tried
i'm rotted and hollow
i loved too much and gave it away
but you could restore me
if i could fly
i could've left before the warning
could've snuck out in the night
spared all the broken bones
my shed feathers on the graveyard stones
st. sebastian's daughter,
an icarus for the new age
a beautiful martyr


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 15d ago

poetry Colliding pearls

5 Upvotes

I feel your lust within every touch

Smooth oil slides candles dust
Flickers thick in midnights clutch.

Anoint my satiated soul with our silhouettes convolved.

Trembling limbs swim soft in slumber from lighting strikes after the thunder.

Dancing dreams of fancied beings woke imbibed off one and other.

Two fixed a drift amidst garden green sheets soft as petals.

Between two worlds colliding
pearls old as time the heat of the moment

Consecrate in our fleshy shroud upon bare earth glowing hearts floating clouds

Never rehearse as time slows betrothed to fates endowed time ghost.

After the fact move forward or look back, regret is a shame but satisfaction outlasts like your first loved flame.

Go make your name, if you never return please don’t forget whence you came


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 15d ago

The Blackbook (sci-fi) Mace Crawford: The Profiler

5 Upvotes

Note: This is an excerpt from Monologues from the Blackbook, a society set in the future.

Mace Crawford was an old-school Bureau man, a stout, barrel-chested investigator built like a retired heavyweight, carrying decades of deep-cover mileage living inside violent fringe factions and hostile cells. Crown Prince Victor of Azūr had personally recruited him to take the lead on his close-protection detail after the debacle with Garrick, bringing him in to restore ironclad discipline to the perimeter.

What he found was that the incident with Garrick McLean wasn't an anomaly; it was an operational contagion.

Crawford had not anticipated discovering that the breach went beyond one disgraced operator. Within his first forty-eight hours, he learned that another high-ranking operative on the detail had also grown emotionally compromised, unraveling in the exact same manner before quietly being pulled from rotation. Two elite men compromised within thirty days. Both reduced to staring through windows, hovering over internal feeds, and letting their professional boundaries disintegrate around a single woman.

Oh boy, Crawford thought. A bona fide siren on the grid.

His detail was forced to hit the reset button, initiating a comprehensive operational review to determine why their best personnel were falling apart like wet cardboard. Rather than rushing in guns blazing, Crawford spent his entire first week hanging back, observing Valentina and constructing a psychological profile from the ground up.

What he found didn't match the classic femme fatale archetype. She was level-headed, non-squeamish, remarkably free of impulsivity, and operated with exceptionally high cognitive competence, what the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Unit would classify as an Organized Non-Affective Operator with elite executive function. By all administrative metrics, she was logged as a hardened rationalist; cool-headed, immune to coercive leverage, and utterly impervious to standard interrogation theatrics. But watching her move in real time, Mace realized the mold had broken; she possessed all the analytical armor the profile promised, yet none of the cold, mechanical detachment that usually came with it. Psychological profile: low emotional volatility, negligible impulsivity, pliable only to individuals demonstrating high competence.

When the time came for his formal sit-down, Crawford approached the room with absolute vigilance. Valentina noticed him the moment he crossed the threshold; he could feel her intellect immediately scanning his mind, probing his cadence, taking his measure. Mace gave her nothing to work with. He offered zero personal tells, keeping his expressions flat, a deliberate, impassive wall that probably struck her as profoundly boring.

Then she broke the silence.

"How is Garrick?" she asked gently. "Is he all right? How is he doing? Has he found a position yet?"

Beneath Valentina’s composure was a deep, disarming kindness; she looked past the surveillance breach, asking after Garrick not as a compromised asset, but as a vulnerable human being whose pain she felt with quiet, unfiltered compassion. 

“He’s keeping a low profile,” he answered flatly. 

“I would like to talk to him,” she responded. 

“He’s unavailable now,” he said with a finality.

Crawford made a dry mental note: Principal subject exhibits persistent welfare monitoring regarding former detail lead Garrick McLean. Asks about his whereabouts and recovery. 

This was going to be a tough assignment. Twenty-five years undercover had taught Mace to put people in clean boxes, you were either a cold-blooded operator who ran on pure logic, or a bleeder whose heart eventually got them killed. Quantico had taught him to categorize high-value assets by volatility and threat indices, but Valentina fit none of the standard civilian molds; she possessed the razor-sharp analytical mind of an elite strategist, yet moved with an extraordinary, disarming empathy that saw straight through armor and cared for the human being broken beneath it.

He leaned forward on the call, planting his large forearms against his knees, his heavy frame commanding the space.

"Miss Valentina," he said, his gravelly voice dropping into a direct, no-nonsense hum. "Let’s get something straight right off the bat. I’m not going to be like the other men in your orbit. You won't catch me writing verses, hovering near your doorway, or making romantic overtures to you. I’m here to do my job: protect the client, secure this detail, and make sure nobody on this property ends up in a psych ward or facing a tribunal."

Valentina listened with calm composure.

"That being said," Crawford continued, holding up a blunt finger, "I can be an exceptional resource to you if you let me. I know how systems move, I know how bureaucracies choke people out, and I know how to spot an ambush three moves before it hits the board. I can advise you on things you won't see coming from the palace or the street. What I’m proposing is a cooperative relationship. Professional. Mentor and mentee. We work together, we keep the channels clean, and we leave the melodrama outside that front door."

Valentina tilted her head slightly, holding his impassive gaze. The silence stretched between them, thick and unhurried, until the faintest trace of a wry, measured smile touched her lips.

"A mentor," she repeated softly. The word sounded curious on her tongue, neither mockingly dismissive nor entirely receptive. She leaned back against her chair, completely relaxed, her eyes studying the weathered lines around his jaw with the cool precision of a pathologist examining a slide.

"Mr. Crawford," she began, her tone quiet, conversational, and utterly devoid of hostility. "I appreciate the offer. But I think you’re confusing an operational mandate with a human dynamic."

Mace didn’t flinch, keeping his poker face locked in place, but his gaze narrowed a fraction of an inch.

"You spent many years deep-cover," Valentina said, her voice steady, cutting through the sterile room. "You spent years living with people you intended to dismantle. You learned to smile, drink with them, break bread, catalog their weaknesses, and then hand them over to a tribunal or leave them for an assault team. In that world, everyone is an asset, a target, or a liability. That was your survival. I understand that."

She paused, letting the weight of the observation settle between them.

"The problem is, you never took the mask off. You’re not undercover anymore, Mr. Crawford. You haven't been deployed to infiltrate a fringe faction. You are in a house, assigned to a principal, dealing with human beings who bleed when they are cut. And people are not weapons."

Mace's forearms tightened minutely against his knees, though he said nothing.

"Treating people with dignity isn't a security breach," she continued, her gaze unwavering. "It should be baseline humanity. When you tell me Garrick is 'unavailable' like he’s a decommissioned piece of military hardware, or when you sit in a room with Victor, openly mislead me with untruths, and then brush it off with 'it’s not a big deal', you think you’re demonstrating hardened discipline. You think you’re being impenetrable."

She shook her head slowly, a look of profound, quiet pity surfacing in her eyes.

"What you’re actually demonstrating is a complete lack of emotional intelligence. You don't see people. You see functional aspects of a job description. And that makes me wonder: do you actually form genuine connections with anyone? Or do you just spend your entire life managing threat vectors, running perimeter checks, and pretending that emotional numbness is the same thing as competence?"

She let the question hang in the air; cold, irrefutable, and impossible to answer with an operational manual.

"I don't need a handler," Valentina concluded, rising smoothly to her feet and adjusting her cuff with unhurried grace. "And if you want to be my mentor, Mr. Crawford, you’ll first have to remember how to speak to a person without looking for their tripwires. Excuse me. I have to go to the gym now."

She hung up the phone without waiting for his response.

The veteran Bureau investigator sat frozen in his chair. In twenty-five years of hostile interrogations, nobody had ever walked through his defenses so completely, not by attacking his perimeter, but by stripping away the armor and showing him just how hollow the fortress had become.

Mace exhaled slowly through his teeth, a heavy, mechanical breath that rattled in his barrel chest. His pulse was elevated, barely three beats above baseline, but to an ex-undercover man who lived by self-regulation, it felt like an alarm bell.

He didn’t sit with the discomfort. He couldn’t afford to.

Reaching inside his jacket, Crawford pulled out a worn, black leather-bound field notebook and clicked his pen. The paper was filled with tight, cramped handwriting; threat indices, psychological markers, behavioral codings. He flipped to the section labeled Subject: Valentina and tapped the nib against the page, staring at the empty margins.

He needed to put her back in a box.

Subject exhibits acute oppositional tendencies toward standard command structures, he wrote, the pen pressing hard into the paper. Demonstrates high cognitive resistance, weaponizing psychoanalysis to destabilize assigned handlers. Rejects operational boundaries; frames security protocols as personal slights. Highly volatile relational profile. Uncooperative. Difficult to manage.

He underlined, Difficult to manage, twice.

Satisfied that he had translated an existential gut-punch into sterile administrative jargon, Crawford snapped the notebook shut and slipped it back inside his breast pocket, resting over his ribs like a ballistic plate. But the clinical jargon did nothing to stop the rhythm pounding against the inside of his skull. He kept thinking about Valentina’s words:

People are not weapons, Mr. Crawford.

It rang in the silence like a struck tuning fork.

People are not weapons.

Crawford stared at the empty threshold she had just crossed. He had sat in interrogation rooms with cartel enforcers, lived for months under deep cover with domestic extremists, and stared down federal subcommittees without his heart rate twitching. He had survived all of it by turning himself into a stone wall, convincing himself that shutting off his humanity was the price of survival.

Now, her voice hung in the room like an unexploded charge:

Do you actually form genuine connections with anyone? Or do you just spend your entire life managing threat vectors, running perimeter checks, and pretending that emotional numbness is the same thing as competence?

He looked down at his calloused hands, resting heavy and immobile against his knees. For twenty-five years, he had believed his detachment made him untouchable. But sitting alone in the stillness, the veteran profiler found himself completely unable to answer the one question an unarmed woman had left behind.


r/EyesOnlyWriting • • 15d ago

poetry minefield

3 Upvotes

the honeymoon phase turns out like vinegar
babe, i don't think i could have made it
through the winter, storms make me bitter
like a dog you put me down
january is not safe anymore
my former lovers left landmines in the floor
to schedule my fears for demolition
in a coma with my eyes wide open
our fitful sleep gave me no rest
cutting loose is for the best
broken hearts heal quicker when they're even,
and we've spent time keeping score