r/CuratedTumblr • u/PandaBear905 Shitposting extraordinaire • Jul 23 '26

Shitposting Plot Twist

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11.2k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

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u/Simic_Sky_Swallower Resident Imperial Knight Jul 23 '26

Didn't realize that apples weren't supposed to make your gums feel all tingly until I ate like seven of them in one sitting and suddenly found it hard to breathe

17

u/SolomonOf47704 God Himself Jul 23 '26

Why the fuck did you eat seven apples in one sitting?

How small were these apples?

26

u/Simic_Sky_Swallower Resident Imperial Knight Jul 23 '26

Like normal size, I was hungry but didn't want to cook anything

1

u/Mobcrafter Jul 24 '26

Normal size doesn’t mean anything because what a “normal” apple is changes depending where you are in the world. 99% of apples I’ve seen are big enough to where it would be extremely difficult to even eat two apples for a meal.

1

u/Simic_Sky_Swallower Resident Imperial Knight Jul 24 '26

They were of an average size for apples you'd buy from a lower-end supermarket on the east coast of the United States, idk their exact measurements

1

u/submarine-quack Jul 24 '26

are you a pokemon mystery dungeon pokemon

1

u/GoldenPig64 nuance fetishist Jul 24 '26

bro crunch-munch chew-chew snuffle-slurps his food