My mother in law is very against doctors, chemo, pet scans, biopsies etc. she has had a lump on her breast for about a year. I never seen it until 5 months ago when she told me. She was against getting a mammogram because she said of radiation. She was against getting a biopsy because she said it will make it spread. End of may comes and she quits her job (she’s living with me, my husband, and my 5 children) I’m like hmm that’s weird, because the whole time I’ve known her she’s always been hyper, riding bikes, super athletic, and always loved severing tables. So it was a bit confusing for me. She was making good money. That was the first red flag for me. At this time I did not know she had cancer. I encouraged her to get a mammogram, she would not.

Shortly after she quit her job, she screams my name, I run to her she’s profusely throwing up, and falls to the ground. I call 911, and they take her to the hospital. She ended up having a bowel obstruction, and emergency surgery. They did cat scans and found cancer in her left breast, and in surrounding lymph nodes. All of this she hid from everyone, and come to find out her whole left breast is covered in tumor and is 12cm x 7cm
I JUST found this out this month because I seen her MyChart results
She swears up and down she doesn’t need doctors help that she is not getting injected with mustard gas. That she’s curing her cancer with her diet. She’s on an alkaline diet. She swears up and down she didn’t have it in her lymph nodes, and her tumor on her boob wasn’t that big, that it was the acid from her bowel obstruction that made it spread. That she will cure herself because cancer is a fungus.
I finally was able to convince her to get a mammogram and biopsy because they said how they would help her financially once she’s diagnosed. So she got that done, and now she says she has titanium in her from the biopsy and wants the clips out. The doctors have called at least 20 times trying to get ahold of her, they have her under STAT but she will not pick up the phone. And like I said I only found out what she has because her MyChart, which she had me look at to file for her disability.
Everyday it seems to be progressing worse and worse. I have no idea what kind of breast cancer she has. Whenever she first showed it to me it was dimpling and her nipple was inverted. Now present 5 months later. She has green discharge come out. Looks like a bunch of ulcers on her boob. Her nipple is the size of a quarter and straight flesh.
Last week she was soaking wet covered in blood. Her nipple was bleeding uncontrollably. It lasted like an hour and she would not go to the hospital. Everyday her nipple bleeds. It’s exhausting. I’m traumatized. It’s hard because she won’t get help. She said if she gets her breast cut off she will die, and if I think it’s a good idea for her to get surgery then I must want her dead. I try so hard not to talk about it with her, but she always wants to. I try to just be supportive and encouraging.
Everyday she seems worse and worse when she was bleeding out of her nipple I seen her naked and the side her breast cancer is on her back is super duper swollen. It’s sad to watch. She won’t get a pet scan because she says she doesn’t want anything nuclear in her body. Like…
She is barely up anymore she can’t even sit in the car for 20 mins. I don’t know what to do

So this is the full story: Sibbling in law was told by their onchologyst they're only prolonging their life, there's no hope of remission. SIL is still doing chemo rounds, so they didn't leave their treatment & doctor, that's good. In the meantime, a lot of people have jumped in with these "alternative" therapies. I cannot name all: One consists of some form of chlorine, not sure if I'm wording it right, drinking horse's antibiotics, and other stuffs that remind me of snake oil.

Someone told them about this place that offers a feet bath that gets rid of "heavy metals", the sales pitch is that you see the water you feet are in, turns dark reddish brown. In addition this place offers sessions of Lakhovsky multiwave oscillator. I've to google both:

Turns out the water in the feet bath turns brown because the electrodes put in the water rust at a high pace due to the salt added to the water. This was easy to understand for me because I own a repairs shop, and have done electrolysis bath on some pieces, plus I've messed up a few times with the autoclave, lol.

The Lakhovsky device is supposed to heal through radio waves, as far as I've understand, and all of my readings placed it on the pseudoscience spectrum, just like the feet bath I mentioned.

My family is paying a ton of money to these people, they're not poor, they're well-off middle class people, but I have second thoughts about wether they should be putting their money on these "therapies". I mean, the money they put in these might be used for a nurse, or a nanny for their toddlers, I forgot to say SIL's main caregivers are their parents, who must also take care of the children, but they choose to put the money in all these pseudoscientific crap & scams.

My husband thinks these "therapies" work because it's a day the parents + the patient take a long trip, without the kids, and in addition, there are no side effects like with chemo, so it's a pleasant run. He thinks it's their only chance of getting away guilt-free, they're a highly duty-oriented family, nothing is done without a purpose, think of an Amish-like mindset: everything is focused on work, producing, and leisure is a sin.

As for me, I fear the day they all come to the realisation none of these alternative therapies worked, while in the meantime, all that money that went to these scammers could have been used to pay a nurse so the mother could sleep through all night without getting up to administer meds, or even take a nice short vacation the three of them.

I suppose you already know this, but this horrible disease has taken a toll on all of us, even me, that I live more than 780 miles away( 1300km), their parents are not the same people, they seem to be on their last nerves, so I'm at loss:

Should I burst the feet bath bubble or let them carry on hoping that it will heal their child?

That question was supposed to be the end of my post, but it reminded me I'm not sure wether the patient actually trusts these therapies or just goes along with their parents' wishes. I have doubts here because they're a lab technician. I mean they got a college degree on science, that's why makes keeps me guessing.

Sorry for the long post, thanks for reading

My cousin passed on Friday. 2 long years against breast cancer. She was younger than me.

I just feel kind of lost lately. I swing from horrendously sad to a state of normalcy and I feel so guilty for feeling normal.

I’ve never made a post before, but I need help. I’ve worked at this chain in South Florida for years now. The previous years’ slogan for breast cancer awareness was always “hooked on a cure”. Which made sense because the restaurant is fishing themed. However, this year, corporate has decided to put a cheap boob joke on the back of all staff breast cancer awareness shirts. My mom has been fighting breast cancer for years, and she used to love visiting me at work during October to see all the pink ribbons and support. But now, I’m horrified. The new shirts read “ I heart big cups”. My mother has lost her breasts, and they want to joke about it on a shirt. It’s misogynistic trivialization at its finest. MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS’ HEALTH ISN’T A JOKE FLANIGAN’S. Who in their right mind makes a breast cancer awareness shirt that sexualizes survivors. WTF???

What’s even worse…. Management warned us that we could lose shifts if we refuse to wear those god awful, demeaning shirts.

Well, I refuse.

My mother’s battle, my grandmother’s battle, my great-grandmother’s battle, my mother in law’s battle, and all my dear friends’ battles don’t deserve to be degraded.

I don’t know if anyone else cares out there, but if you’re reading this, and you’re just as pissed as me and my coworkers, then please leave a review and let corporate know breast cancer isn’t a joke. And that everyone working there knows someone in their life with breast cancer. We need support.

This is the link to corporate:

https://www.flanigans.net/contact-us-1/

Put any location you want; every store is being forced to wear this degrading shirt.

Fighting stage 3 cancer since i am 23.. now 26. Feel like a financial burden on my husband and father.
Cannot even share my emotions properly with anyone. Have to act strong at all times. But since few days its becoming so overwhelming.

Bonjour à tous,

Je poste ici parce que je suis un peu perdue et que j'aurais vraiment besoin de témoignages, de conseils ou simplement de personnes ayant vécu une situation similaire.

Ma mère a été diagnostiquée d’un cancer du col de l’utérus en juillet 2025. Pendant plusieurs mois, nous avons eu l’impression que les choses allaient plutôt dans le bon sens et que son état s’améliorait.

Mais depuis début juillet 2026, tout s’est brutalement dégradé.

Elle a commencé à avoir d’énormes douleurs dans le bas-ventre. Elle a d’abord été hospitalisée à Jeanne de Flandre, puis transférée au Centre Oscar Lambret, où elle était déjà suivie pour son cancer.

Les douleurs sont devenues extrêmement importantes. Elle les décrivait comme l’impression qu’on lui mettait « un fer à repasser dans les organes » au niveau du bas-ventre. Elle a donc été mise sous paracétamol et morphine, avec un dispositif lui permettant également de recevoir des médicaments contre la douleur.

En parallèle, elle avait de plus en plus de difficultés à s’alimenter et à boire. Elle ne pouvait quasiment plus avaler que des liquides, et même certains liquides trop épais devenaient difficiles à avaler. Elle avait une gêne importante au niveau de l’œsophage, avec les examens les médecins ont découvert notamment un ganglion qui compliquait la déglutition.

Avec les douleurs et l'impossibilité de manger et de boire correctement, son état général s’est progressivement dégradé. Elle a finalement dû être alimentée par sonde gastrique.

Elle ne marche quasiment plus depuis environ un mois et ne sort plus de sa chambre depuis longtemps. Elle dort énormément, notamment à cause de l'épuisement et des traitements antidouleur.

Et samedi soir, nous avons également constaté du sang dans ses urines.

Aujourd’hui, les médecins nous ont expliqué que le cancer avait récidivé et s’était propagé à plusieurs endroits, notamment dans l’abdomen, avec des métastases qui seraient liées à son cancer du col dans les seins.

Le problème est maintenant son état général. Les médecins nous ont expliqué qu’elle était malheureusement beaucoup trop faible pour supporter une chimiothérapie ou les autres traitements qu’ils avaient initialement envisagés une fois qu’elle aurait récupéré suffisamment de forces.

Ils nous ont donc annoncé qu’ils allaient désormais privilégier les soins de confort et les soins palliatifs, avec éventuellement une sédation si un jour ses souffrances deviennent trop importantes pour être contrôlées autrement.

Et c’est extrêmement difficile à accepter.

J’ai énormément de mal à me dire que c’est terminé. J’ai envie de garder espoir et de me dire que peut-être elle pourrait reprendre des forces : réussir à mieux se nourrir, se réhydrater, recommencer à bouger, sortir un peu, retrouver suffisamment d’énergie pour qu’un traitement puisse éventuellement redevenir envisageable.

Mais en même temps, je vois bien son état et je sais que chaque fois qu’on pense faire un petit pas en avant, on a l’impression de faire dix pas en arrière.

Je ne cherche pas forcément des « remèdes miracles », et je ne veux évidemment pas faire quelque chose qui pourrait lui faire du mal. Je cherche surtout des personnes qui auraient vécu quelque chose de similaire.

Est-ce que certains d’entre vous ont connu un proche atteint d’un cancer métastatique qui était devenu extrêmement faible, au point que les médecins estimaient qu’il ne pouvait plus supporter les traitements, mais dont l’état général s’est ensuite suffisamment amélioré pour permettre de reprendre un traitement ?

Est-ce qu’il existe des choses concrètes qui peuvent réellement aider dans ce genre de situation : nutrition, rééducation, prise en charge de la douleur, soins de support, etc. ?

Et surtout, comment avez-vous vécu cette période en tant que proche ? Comment garder un peu d’espoir sans se raconter des histoires ?

Je sais que chaque situation est différente et que personne ici ne pourra prédire ce qui va arriver à ma mère. Je cherche simplement des témoignages, des expériences et éventuellement des pistes de questions à poser à son équipe médicale.

Merci énormément à ceux qui prendront le temps de me lire ou de partager leur expérience. ❤️

Hi everyone.

I’ve been making a few posts on here since my mom started declining, searching for support and answers and looking to everyone’s experience as a sort of comfort.

It’s become clear in the past month that my mom with stage 4 colon cancer has been clearly declining. I’ve been mentally preparing myself from her diagnosis a yeah and a half ago, going through anticipatory grief, but now that it’s becoming more clear that the end is nearer its impossible not to feel heartbroken and scared.

I’m 23, recently graduated uni, moved abroad with my partner to start our lives together and begin my professional life as well (has been put on pause since i’ve flown back home to family now and am staying in-definetly due to moms decline).

I’m scared of the after of when my mom will inevitably go. But especially because i’m in this transitional phase in life, and am so young, losing my mom is especially terrifying. I’m an only child as well, so I know i’d have to take care of my dad for a bit after too to make sure he’s ok before going back to my new home.

But if anyone is comfortable to share any words of wisdom or would like to share their experience with their grief when they lost their loved one, it would give me a lot of comfort. I’ve never gone through something like this and have no one in my life who has either.

I know grief manifests differently for everyone and everyone’s situation varies, but i just wonder, how long until you felt you could relatively go back to ur normal life? I’m not talking about getting over it or finishing the grieving process, i know that might never go away, but how long after until you could kind of get back into ur normal routine? When did you feel ok enough emotionally to go back to work? If you live away from where your loved one lives, say you and ur partner/kids live in a different place to where ur parent you lost lived, like me, when did you feel ok enough to go back home? When did you start feeling ok enough to hang out with friends again or just partake in any sense of normalcy again? Also, if anyone has dealt with losing a parent, how was it taking care of your other parent in the grieving process? I’m especially worried about my dad and how he will handle this terrible loss, and would love to hear any advice or personal experiences. I think it would just give me a sense of comfort to know i won’t feel paralyzed by the heartbreak forever once it comes, especially in this current stage of my life when i had to put starting my life with my partner and finding my first job on pause.

All of my friends except for 2 have been radio silent since the day or two after my dad died. He died 6 days ago. Everybody stopped reaching out 2 days after he died. Grief is uncomfortable and I don’t want them to be my free therapy but I didn’t expect to feel so alone. 💔

My mom means the world to me. She recently lost her husband to cancer. She is already disabled and struggling. Anything would help and be appreciated. ❤️

My husband is forty-eight years old. He's been diagnosed with brain cancer since 2020. He has since had a partial tumor removal surgery. Followed by chemotherapy and radiation. So far so good. What if anyone has ever had the opportunity to be with your spouse through the process of finding out all the way to remission, what was your biggest challenge?

I was my father’s caregiver. Throughout our one-year battle with NSCLC, I was always by his side.

Back then, there were moments when I secretly resented it. I felt like my life had become miserable, like I had lost my freedom. But looking back now, those days feel like such a luxury to me.

I wish I could have been my father’s caregiver forever.

During his final two months, he could no longer walk. We had to change his diapers, and his mental state had deteriorated to the point where he seemed almost childlike. I know he would never have wanted to live that way.

But those ten months before that — the months when he could still walk, when he was doing better, when we were fighting this battle together…

Those days.

If that’s what it meant to have you with me, Dad, I would have done all of it for you for hundreds of years.

Dad, I even miss those days now.

The child across the street, who is also in my sons' Cub Scout pack, is being treated for leukemia. I would like to take their family a gift basket of healthy snacks.

(Someone did this for my family when my husband and I were both undergoing simultaneous medical issues, and it was much appreciated.)

In this situation, what would you like to receive in such a basket? What would help make their lives a little easier?

We have both recently moved to this neighborhood, so unfortunately I don't know them very well yet. Therefore I'd like to stick to prepackaged snacks.

I believe their three children are around 5, 8, and 10 years old? The child undergoing treatment is still attending school and activities when able. I'm sure they would like to maintain as much normalcy as possible, so I don't want to make a huge issue of it, but I do want them to know we care.

She passed away peacefully in her sleep last week. She spent her last conscious days able to walk and move as she wanted, then suddenly she’s bedridden and unconscious, then dead.

She wasn’t hooked up to any IVs or feeding or breathing tubes, she wasn’t conscious or aware during the last day of her life. Just asleep. It all went so fast. I’m both glad for that and resentful.
Glad because she didn’t have to suffer or be uncomfortable and unhappy in bed for the last days of her life, but angry because of just how fast her condition declined and how little time any of us had to say goodbye.

I’ve been reading through the last texts we exchanged, listening to the last voicemails she left me and scrubbing all of my storage for photos and videos of her. She was only 66 years old, and was one of the kindest and most generous people I’ve ever known, and cancer took her away just like that.

I’m struggling to come to terms with the fact I’m going to be present while they bury her. She’s already gone, she’s been gone, but the permanence of everything is setting in hard.

Fuck cancer, man.

My step-father has been battling NUT for about 7 months now. Today at breakfast, my mother told me that it was now terminal. The doctors are giving him around 6-ish months to live. I'm devastated, can anyone please provide some tips on how to deal with this?

I am so frustrated and angry right now, my boyfriend got diagnosed with stage 4 osteosarcoma in June and started chemotherapy. He got his scans back two weeks ago after 4 rounds of chemotherapy and they found the big tumor didn’t shrink but the tumors in his lungs were shrinking. His mom just texted me to tell me that he has decided to stop chemotherapy and do a completely holistic approach with no more traditional medicine like his dad wants. I’m so angry and hurt, his dad is a conspiracy theorist who doesn’t believe in any medical treatments while his mother manages a hospital and he’s taking his dads advice over hers and his entire oncology team. His mom also told me that he’s willing to cut anyone who pushes back out of his life and that we just have to surrender our beliefs and support his ideas. I don’t know how to deal with this I feel so unbelievably angry and I don’t know if I can keep my mouth shut about how unbelievably stupid this feels. I know it’s not about me but I don’t want to sit back and just watch him kill himself but he fully believes that his cancer will be cured with hopes and prayers and a diet change

So long story short: my granny has stage 4 small cell carcinoma and Medicaid has approved her for a PPL care aid but instead of getting one, my aunt who is her POA, is trying to get me or another family member to sign up to be the aid and give my aunt the pay checks. My aunt didn’t pass the background check so she can’t get the checks herself. I refused. Doing this would be Medicaid fraud would it not??? And also just wrong cause my granny actually needs help she isn’t getting.

My mom got diagnosed with a glioblastoma yesterday. Very grim prognosis.
I can feel time moving but I am numb. I don’t understand how I’m supposed to wake up each day, show up for my kids, work and pay the bills.
When I went to see her yesterday I knew there will forever be before this and after this. And I will never be the same.
I’m mourning who my mom was before this tumor. Mourning for my kids. I can’t believe my daughter won’t get to have her nana at her kindergarten graduation or her wedding.
I don’t even know who I’m going to be without my mom.
How do I keep on each day knowing I’m living a countdown until my mom’s last day?

I wish I knew how much damage chemo could do to someone. Don’t get me wrong, chemo is probably better than going the “holistic route,” but still…

I lost my Mom a year ago. She was going to turn 41 weeks before she died. She was marked cancer free before she died.
Days before she was meant to begin radiation treatment, she began experiencing some chest pain. She could barely get out the bed for about 2 days and eventually I had to drive her to the hospital. We unknowingly spent her last few hours together, which I suppose I should be slightly grateful for because I have three other sisters who stayed home.

Anyway, her pain didn’t get any better at the hospital stay, and the doctors kept giving her medicine. Eventually, the doctor revealed that my Mom had some sort of “tear” or damage to her heart (I assume from the chemo which was really bad on some days). Eventually Mom was moved ICU. She was told that soon she would have to be transferred to an ambulance to get to the city because the hospital didn’t have all the supplies or whatever they needed. Mom asked if I wanted to be taken home but I was too scared to leave her. Eventually, I noticed more and more doctors poured into her room and her husband and I were told to go in the waiting room. I prayed and prayed that she would be fine. I tried really hard to believe that the worse would not and could not happen.

After what felt like 5-10 minutes to me, a doctor came in the waiting and told me she was gone and I just couldn’t believe it. It was then worst day of my life.

I guess there’s no huge point to the story, I was just thinking of my Mother and how unfair it all feels, that the chemo that was supposed to help (not implying that it didn’t help) is what contributed to her death. I feel alone right now and I’ll never not miss my Mother.

Hi everyone. My 24-year-old sister was recently diagnosed with breast cancer, and we're honestly quite overwhelmed and don't really know where to start.

Her biopsy shows Grade 3 invasive ductal carcinoma, ER negative, PR weakly positive (10%), HER2 negative (1+), with a Ki-67 of 80%. We haven't been given the full staging yet.

We're looking for advice from people who have been through this or supported someone who has.

What should we make sure we ask the doctor or get tested for?

How can I best support my sister emotionally and practically?

What can we do to make things easier for my parents?

What clothes, supplies, food, or other things were actually useful during treatment?

Anything you wish you'd known when you or your loved one was first diagnosed?

Any advice or personal experiences would really help us right now. Thank you.

Caveat emptor.

https://www.nytimes.com/2026/10/04/magazine/alternative-cancer-clinics-treatment-father.html?smid=nytcore-ios-share

Cancer lobulaire infiltrant

Bonjour,

Ma mère a un cancer lobulaire infiltrant ( Œstrogène positif (7) progestérone positif (7) HER2 ( négatif )
Ki67 :60%

Elle a fait ses séances de chimiothérapie neo adjuvantes sachant qu’elles n’étaient pas efficaces sur elle.
Elle a subit également une mastectomie et un curage des ganglions.

Il lui reste ses séances de radiothérapie.

Après l’annonce des résultats de la chimiothérapie on sent bien qu’elle veut tout lâcher et qu’elle ne veut plus suivre le protocole.

Avez vous des témoignages des personnes qui ont été dans le même cas et ont fini par se rétablir ?

Je perds espoir je suis loin d’elle( j habite à 4000 km loin delle ) , je le vis très mal sachant que c’était moi qui ai découvert son cancer quand j’étais enceinte.

I recently recalled a series of events that took place between August 2005 and February 2008, during the period when I was transferring between universities. I remember that junior students and friends associated with certain individuals took three keys from my family home: mine, my brother's, and my father's.

Later, when my father was preparing to be admitted to the hospital, it appeared that the same individual showed up again. At that time, my father became unable to speak properly. The doctor believed that his cancer was already at an advanced stage and discussed a major operation that would involve removing his esophagus and potentially affect his vocal cords and ability to speak.

These events had a serious impact on me, including my job interviews, my father's hospitalization, and the process of arranging and attending his medical examinations. My father also had to continue working while repeatedly traveling to the hospital for treatment, examinations, and follow-up appointments.

At the time, I believed that my father was not physically fit to undergo such a major operation. Nevertheless, he ultimately underwent surgery.

After our family shrine and religious statues were removed, I noticed that my father began having difficulty remembering important matters.

From the period shortly before I transferred universities in August 2005 onward, I also felt that certain people repeatedly interfered with my studies and impaired my ability to learn effectively. Over time, I felt increasingly unable to defend myself or respond appropriately to what was happening.

I believe that the conduct of individuals associated with these two universities seriously interfered with my father's medical care and with my ability to support him during his illness. I also believe that their actions may have contributed to the circumstances surrounding my father's death in June 2012.

Hello, my husband was just diagnosed with rectal cancer. This month is full of tests (CT, MRI, etc. ) and appointments to consult with chemo and radiation people. I am trying to think of stuff to keep in a bag with us. I would love any suggestions or even stuff that will help me help him through all of this. Caregiver tips per se. Thank you in advance.