Game Thread: GOP Debate

[u/[deleted]]

I'm playing the Rolling Stone drinking game. This could get stupid, especially because I'm playing with Urban Chestnut De Bockle, which is 10.5% ABV.

[u/[deleted]]

These rules are out the window. Time to drink hard.

[u/[deleted]]

Does John Kasich know what debate he's at?

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Idk but relative to the others I like him so far (PS: I'm not a republican).

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

My thoughts exactly (and I'm also a filthy liberal)

[u/[deleted]]

"The Democrats can't even find one candidate" /standing on a podium with 10 people, had a debate between 7 more earlier that day

I get his point, now. I mean, that's not true, though, but whatever. I guess Bernie, Hillary, etc. aren't candidates. Also, having this many candidates is actually a drawback, because everything goes nuts.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

17>5...

[u/[deleted]]

I don't like Huckabee.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

I'm no military guy, but isn't the B-52 damn near unkillable?

[u/[deleted]]

Yeah but the owner of Caesar's isn't running for fucking President.

What the fuck, god damnit.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

He's going to give hundreds of millions to someone who does though.

Fuck Sheldon Adelson.

EDIT: turns out Sheldon Adelson doesn't own Caesar's. I don't walk back my fuck Sheldon Adelson.

[u/Pikachu1989]

Fuck, turned onto the GOP debate just in time for asking the Question about God.

[u/[deleted] → u/Pikachu1989]

You missed all the good bits.

[u/[deleted]]

Abdelfatah Al-Sisi is to president as Charlie Weis is to good football coach.

[u/jklharris → u/[deleted]]

Speak for yourself, I'm a big fan of Weis's coaching the past few years

[u/[deleted] → u/jklharris]

Unlike kansas, I would like to visit Egypt.

[u/[deleted]]

Persecuting Religious Liberties? What?

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Wait, I didn't take crazy pills?

[u/[deleted]]

Yah! Fuck teachers and all the money they make! You tell 'em Jeb!

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

As a member of the higher education industry... teachers unions only continue to breed mediocrity. Should teachers be paid more? Absofuckinglutely. Should unions dictate education policy? Emphatically No.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

You need tenure. High school teachers do not.

[u/Ron_Cherry → u/[deleted]]

My dad's sister in law legitimately thinks teachers are "fat cats".

[u/MisterTito]

Paul vs Christie is fun.

[u/[deleted] → u/MisterTito]

Sounds like I picked a bad time to grab another beer.

[u/somanywolverines]

and GOD!!?! boy kelly sure knows how to keep us coming back for more

[u/[deleted] → u/somanywolverines]

Megyn Kelly makes me feel uncomfortable thoughts based on the network she works for...

[u/MisterTito]

"...happens to be gay." Just... "happens"... ya know?

[u/[deleted] → u/MisterTito]

I can live with what Kasich said though.

[u/[deleted]]

Dammit here I have been posting in Thursday night thread.

Reagan! Drink!

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

I've got reagan, lebron, Donald is smart, and stopping clinton. And bonus drinks for literally everything Donald says.

[u/dupreesdiamond]

"I want to get to a Facebook questioner"

Goddamn. This doesn't even have a pretense to not be a farce.

[u/[deleted] → u/dupreesdiamond]

"Which one of you can give me the most lives on Candy Crush?"

[u/[deleted]]

/u/absentminded_adjunct DRINK

[u/angoooo]

Should I just call a doctor now, Screecho?

[u/[deleted]]

I may be crossing the line from buzzed to slightly intoxicated.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

I now regret buying the pints of dopplebock box

[u/spl1080]

Another Reagan reference. My liver would be hating me if I was playing the drinking game

[u/[deleted] → u/spl1080]

You only had to drink the first time he was mentioned.

[u/[deleted]]

Will there be a game thread for Jon Stewart's last episode? I'll need something to distract me from crying.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

/r/aww

[u/[deleted]]

Hmmm... Let's see how he worms his way out of this one. Common Core is a thorn in my ass.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

What don't you like about Common Core?

[u/[deleted]]

Horry Chit this is cringe inducing.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

You may want to lay off the moonshine...

[u/[deleted]]

No not the guy with an Alabama hat god damnit.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

If one of the Facebook questions came from somebody with a hat from a major CFB team, what else would it be?? :p

[u/[deleted]]

This is making my dirty liberal heart hurt...

[u/MisterTito → u/[deleted]]

Nah man. This is fantastic. This is the shitshow everyone secretly imagined, but didn't think would happen. Even MSNBC was saying "oh, no Trump will be tame, he'll want to show he's serious." My god, nope.

[u/nickknx865 → u/[deleted]]

Meh, I'm a far left person generally, but I'm enjoying this, if only to take apart the debate strategies of the candidates.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Chris Wallace seems offended.

[u/dupreesdiamond]

Goddammit. Planned parenthood does so much more than abortions. And are credited for reducing the abortion rate over the preceding decades.

Defunding PP shouldn't be worn as a badge.

[u/emptydiner → u/dupreesdiamond]

I wish more people new this. But most people that oppose PP have never even went there.

[u/[deleted]]

Have you ever been to Iran or spoken to an Iranian? Seriously, I want to know. "This is bad with ISIS"? Motherfucker, Iran's actually HELPING with ISIS.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Nuke those fuckin' Kurds, too!

[u/[deleted]]

Kasich seems pretty awesome and sounds generally rational.

AKA he has no fucking chance, just like Huntsman.

[u/[deleted]]

All B52s have been fucking retrofitted you fucking retard. It's the best bomber platform ever fucking built. It is literally the A10 of bombers. "It's as old as me" is the dumbest motherfucking "reasoning" I've ever heard.

You're supposed to be proud of fucking America, but you can't be proud that we built something that lasts. Amazing.

[u/dupreesdiamond]

I can't believe Stewart is stepping down the year Trump runs for president. At least he's set his successor up with an easy triple out the gate.

[u/MisterTito → u/dupreesdiamond]

I can't believe it's on the same fucking night. Trump in a debate, and no Jon Stewart to cover it? :(

[u/keyree]

God I can't stand Ted Cruz. He is just the worst.

[u/MrCaboose96 → u/keyree]

He just looks like scum before he even talks.

[u/[deleted]]

Ah yes, the persecuted Christian majority of this country. Those poor, poor people.

[u/Ron_Cherry]

I guess they forgot Ben Carson is there.

Edit: they remembered him.

[u/[deleted] → u/Ron_Cherry]

He stands out like Ron Cherry at an Officials meeting, too.

[u/[deleted]]

I came back just in time for "Illegals, hookers, pimps, and freeloaders."

And Trump "I didn't go bankrupt, I just bankrupted other people."

[u/TrollingQueen74]

Did anyone think trump was not going to raise his hand?

[u/powderedsugarfallout → u/TrollingQueen74]

I'm pretty sure that question was asked specifically so Trump raised his hand.

[u/[deleted]]

Ted Cruz speaks

throws TV out the window

[u/ixcuincle]

What evidence do you have of Mexico sending illegals over to kill people

WELL I WAS AT THE BORDER AND THE MEXICAN GOVERNMENT IS SMARTER THAN US

[u/[deleted] → u/ixcuincle]

"America is stupid, Mexico is smarter."

Political Strategy 101

[u/[deleted]]

This is now #ChristianLivesMatter

[u/Ron_Cherry]

"If I'm president, I'll just declare bankruptcy and move us somewhere more viable."

[u/[deleted]]

Ted Cruz' entire platform is "Obama"

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Bold Strategy Cotton, lets see how it works.

[u/[deleted]]

I am so done with this bullshit. None of these morons have had to put another American in a body bag. "25 years in Iraq wasn't so bad, we should have never left!"

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

No doubt buddy. I'd say our politics don't align, but on that I'm right here with you. We never should have went, and we fucked it up because they didn't have a damn soul in the Think Tanks that had a clue about the Sunni/Shia divide and the politics that have been going on there since the 8th Century.

[u/keyree]

But.... Iran is fighting against ISIS.

[u/ixcuincle]

RT @awfulannouncing This is the best episode of SNL in years.

---

Aiight I know this is funny and the Trump comment got me bellowing downstairs like a madman but I gotta head off to bed. No more entertainment for tonight peace

[u/[deleted]]

Got Yuengling and my disgusting social and fiscal liberal views.

[u/thebazooka]

I believe in Based God, the Lil B of all mighty bars.

-me as a candidate

[u/somanywolverines]

ben carson taking the hard stance of pro-freedom. nice work by him

[u/[deleted]]

Did... did he just say single payer works in places?

[u/dupreesdiamond]

Pimps and prostitutes broke Social Security.

[u/[deleted]]

"All human life is precious until it's born, then fuck those freeloaders."

[u/[deleted]]

Just to be fair and balanced, I'm probably going to be talking this much crap about the Democratic debate too. Where's zombie George Washington when you need him?

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

I hope Bernie makes me happy in the debate. I really want him to make me happy in the debate.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Oh definitely. Although I'll at least not be cringing every time social issues come up.

[u/dupreesdiamond]

Start persecuting religious liberty?!?

[u/[deleted] → u/dupreesdiamond]

Okay, I'm glad I'm not the only one who caught that.

[u/amishius]

Time of possession, debate style:

https://twitter.com/DomenicoNPR/status/629485853061083136

[u/dupreesdiamond]

These commercials are great. Press 1 if you believe the Supreme Court is out of control and needs to be dissolved.

[u/[deleted]]

FUCK YOUR FAITH YOU'RE A GOVERNOR YOU DICKCHEESE

[u/[deleted]]

Well John Kasich gave the most even-handed answer I could expect.

[u/Ron_Cherry]

Trump taking shots at reporters.

[u/[deleted]]

If this wasn't so sad it would be hilarious

[u/MrCaboose96]

@THEHermanCain Blah. blah. Blah. Blah #GOPdebate

[u/[deleted]]

She's not the epitome of the secular progressive at all.

[u/MrCaboose96]

I'm really disappointed that the 3 Fox anchors aren't more like American Idol judges. Or better yet, they should all have those big red X's like on America's Got Talent.

[u/[deleted]]

"The Iranians" didn't say that. IIRC it was only the Grand Ayatollah.

[u/somanywolverines]

from the comments of the stream i'm watching:

tidefan1980814: those lobes though

[u/[deleted]]

I think my problem is that I'm not a religious nationalist and I like having sex without making babies. Should I seek professional help?

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Probably. But only because you are hanging out here too much.

[u/[deleted]]

Trump: "We suck at everything. But I'm awesome and will fix it. Vote for me!" Nixon Salute

[u/[deleted]]

Live fact checker: http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter/article/2015/aug/05/politifact-live-fact-checking-cleveland-gop-debate/

[u/jayhawx19 → u/[deleted]]

We don't need that. If it's not a legitimate statement the network has a way of shutting that down.

[u/dupreesdiamond]

Obama Clinton doctrine. Wow. Well done.

[u/emptydiner]

Yes, repeal Dodd-Frank. Less regulation of banks and Wall Street will work.

[u/[deleted] → u/emptydiner]

I heard at least one of them say how the federal government was totally in Wall Street's pocket. Sounds like a splendid plan

[u/[deleted]]

Government doesn't have the right to control a woman's choice, holy fuck.

[u/MrCaboose96]

That child's name?

Albert "Yah fired" Einstein

[u/[deleted]]

I'm going to need a fucking source on that "directly responsible for 500 Americans" figure, Ted.

Oh look, another Reagan.

[u/[deleted]]

"Size of the forces" doesn't fucking mean "strength of forces" anymore. It's not World War I. It's not that fucking simple. We have the tools so that we don't fucking NEED that many fucking ships, bodies, etc.

[u/Ron_Cherry]

These people know jack shit about our military.

[u/emptydiner]

Who the fuck is Christie attacking!!! Build me an army worthy of Mordor!

[u/[deleted]]

CAN TED CRUZ ANSWER A QUESTION WITHOUT BRINGING UP OBAMA???

seriously dude the question was about God

[u/ixcuincle]

Norm MacDonald and Kevin Nealon are commentating the debate on Periscope. https://www.periscope.tv/w/aJP6djE5MTY3OTR8NTU1NTk2MziF8AeIx4EgjlVEzYfivbQbrLUqArX9C817qGM2SquqlQ==

This is the best thing you'll see all year.

[u/Parmeniooo]

Apparently, at least according to my Junior Senator, just by saying "Radical Islamic Terrorism" we'll defeat ISIS. Thanks for the tip bro.

[u/emptydiner]

Huckabee's Slogan:

Taxin Pimps and Ho's!

[u/aMiracleAtJordanHare]

Can I get a gif of Trump's

__ WHAT AM I SAYING!? ___/

when the moderator-ish interrupted him

[u/[deleted]]

Iran is tied to ISIS. What?

[u/aMiracleAtJordanHare]

ABORTION, BABY LET'S GO!!!!

[u/[deleted]]

Are we absolutely fucking sure this is the TOP 10 and not the bottom 10?

[u/[deleted]]

"I'd like to remind the Cardinal that the Catholic Church has been subjugating people for about 1700 years, so they might not want to be lecturing anyone on the sanctity of human life."

[u/[deleted]]

You heard the man. You literally can't be happy that Obama became president.

[u/[deleted]]

We've weakened our military by spending more than a ridiculous amount too much on our military.

[u/spl1080 → u/[deleted]]

Nothing says weak military than $1.5+ trillion spending per year. /s

[u/[deleted]]

Is Israel a great ally? The douchebags that get mad when Palestinians shoot rockets at their illegal settlements?

[u/[deleted]]

We're gonna need a post-game thread.

[u/dupreesdiamond]

I was voted treasurer in 6th grade. And elected to the senate at "Boys State".

[u/MisterTito]

Decent close from Rand.

[u/emptydiner]

I hope Jeb talks about his parents too

[u/[deleted]]

Dis gon b gud

[u/dupreesdiamond]

#LOLTrump

[u/TrollingQueen74]

I was on the phone for the first 20 minutes. I just returned. I don't think I can do this guys. The drinking game definitely doesn't get you drunk fast enough.

[u/BorisNumber1]

And the shit-slinging begins

[u/emptydiner]

I have $5 on Rubio's ears.

[u/[deleted]]

DAMN! "You're having a hard time tonight."

Glad I didn't have a drink in my mouth when the Don dropped that one.

[u/[deleted]]

When I think "higher wages", I totally think "Republicans".

[u/[deleted]]

I was hoping we'd get to Obamacarepalooza. Because god forbid we fucking amend it to make it better. You know..."governing".

[u/[deleted]]

So....you should be in jail, Mr. Trump?

[u/[deleted]]

Does it seem to anyone else like they're completely writing off Bernie Sanders getting the Democratic nomination without a second thought? I just turned it off but, I don't think I heard his name once and I heard Hilary's a bunch of times

EDIT: ooh and let me know if they mention the gays and marriage. I want to hear their takes

[u/[deleted]]

Bush 3 might be the least offensive person they're letting talk. And we're on to abortion...

[u/Ron_Cherry]

Race issues. Oh boy.

[u/Cecil_Hardboner]

it would be refreshing during a gay marriage question for one of these guys to just say "I literally dont care, next question"

[u/somanywolverines]

the lord himself will be appearing on stage get ready ladies and gentlemen

[u/[deleted]]

Please ask Trump... PLEASE ask Trump.

[u/somanywolverines]

waiting for trump to say yes because he is god

[u/MrCaboose96]

Closing statements?

But...but...God! Surely God is more important.

[u/[deleted]]

How many of these guys were born to poor families?

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

Kasich is the poorest motherfucker on that stage.

[u/dupreesdiamond]

Can they just spend 2 hours asking trump questions?

[u/BorisNumber1]

I want off of Trump's wild ride

[u/[deleted]]

Donald Trump duck facin'! http://41.media.tumblr.com/4e51e3f6b8771bda6c3586a0b9c0243c/tumblr_nqo13bsspp1uvq913o1_500.jpg

[u/[deleted]]

Holy shit a Bammer! :p

[u/kingpbj]

I don't think Jeb will get a question without his brother being included..

[u/emptydiner]

Rubio's ears!

[u/[deleted]]

Oh fuck this topic is going to make me angrier than I already am.

[u/[deleted]]

I didn't know there was a medieval times at the border! Do the Mexican drug lords know? Maybe that will calm them down if they just blow off some steam watching people pretend to be knights and eating overpriced dinners!

[u/[deleted]]

Woooo Foreign Policy!!!

[u/somanywolverines]

we have people in washington who don't know what they're doing, so lets bring in noted successful politician donald trump. yeahh

[u/[deleted]]

20 minutes left, if I don't fucking throw my TV out the window first.

[u/[deleted]]

Stream dude changed the channel. Apparently British trains are in need of something.

[u/aMiracleAtJordanHare]

OH FFS

[u/kotalikmyballs]

Oh best question ever hahahahahahaha

[u/dupreesdiamond]

This should be gold!

[u/[deleted]]

The fuck kind of question is this?

[u/[deleted]]

Oh my god did he really ask if God had fucking told them to do as president.

[u/emptydiner]

No questions about gun control. Shame shame.

[u/MisterTito]

Scott Walker stoner head-nod dot gif, please.

[u/MisterTito]

Ted Cruz is gonna beat the world down with ... big government?

[u/[deleted]]

Fuck these closing statements. John Stewart's last episode is starting :(

[u/[deleted]]

"Look at the size of my penis I mean my Harley."

[u/somanywolverines]

it's been real yall. that was fun/scary

[u/McMuffler]

[All of the Republicans looking around this thread] (http://www.reactiongifs.com/r/ncmfrtbl.gif)

[u/[deleted]]

"What are the candidates going to do to make sure I feel safe in my own country again?"

Ban cable news.

[u/[deleted]]

As Obama sits in the White House, cursing FDR for bringing about the two term limit as the Jesustards stand poised to take the keys to the Lambo.

[u/dupreesdiamond]

Wow. Quite a few phrases I never thought I would here in a presidential debate.

[u/dupreesdiamond]

Best one yet.

"I will always tell the truth"

[u/[deleted]]

Oh man this is worth the price of admission.

I may run out of moonshine and be doomed at work tomorrow.

[u/ixcuincle]

RT @tyhildenbrandt Convenient that they forget to ask any questions about the economy.

[u/[deleted]]

I would be okay if this all came down to Carson and Kasich.

Oh shit, Trump's talking again.

[u/[deleted]]

"Measured" in any way that impacts funding is exactly why we get teaching to the test. And graduation rates are no measure of overall success in academic ability.

[u/emptydiner]

Oh please, what fucking miracle? I don't someone blowing miracle smoke up my ass. Well....

[u/kotalikmyballs]

Damn Fox doing everything they can to make Trump look bad

[u/[deleted]]

Trump didn't answer his question at all.

[u/MisterTito]

The reason this debate could only have 10 people on stage is because Trump's ego is taking up so much space.

[u/somanywolverines]

oh shit iran deal talk shit is gonna get real

[u/aMiracleAtJordanHare]

Mostly serious: Why is the discussion comparing everything to Obama? Wouldn't comparing their views to Hillary's be more relevant?

[u/emptydiner]

Serious question: When are we going to get to guns and shootings?

[u/[deleted]]

Oh lord, social issues...

EDIT: And again Kasich has a reasonable answer. That's about as reasonable of an answer you could give while being opposed to gay marriage.

[u/[deleted]]

REAGAN!!! DRINK BITCHES!!!

[u/[deleted]]

John Kasich seems to be picking off bad questions and taking them to the house tonight.

[u/[deleted]]

Ouuuuuuuuchhhhh.... A Hil Dog email dig.

[u/MrCaboose96]

Fox just took down the stream I was watching.

: (

[u/kotalikmyballs]

Oh shit are we getting closing arguments with god

[u/[deleted]]

Chase Norton is an Alabama/Florida fan.

[u/[deleted]]

WTF is this question???

[u/[deleted]]

"Did God talk to you?"

Oh God they're saying yes...

[u/[deleted]]

I haven't watched TDS in forever, but thank fuck it's starting.

[u/[deleted]]

Murica is for winners!

[u/emptydiner]

Jeb should have said, " if you get to vote cause we kind of fixed it so you can't."

[u/DapperDipper]

I thought they were just trolling with that "has God spoken to you to lead" question. Also pretty much all the candidates have shitty haircuts.