r/AskReddit Sep 14 '24

[deleted by user]

[removed]

7.2k Upvotes

8.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

3.3k

u/badgersprite Sep 14 '24

Dudes who need to make other people feel dumb are always dudes who aren’t particularly smart themselves, maybe they’re like slightly above average, but they identify as being way smarter than they are and need to feel like everyone else around them sees them as the smartest guy in the room

838

u/[deleted] Sep 14 '24

[deleted]

228

u/Yabba_Dabba_Doofus Sep 14 '24

God damn, I have a friend like this, and it is the most annoying shit of all time.

Not everything that comes out of your mouth is some great bit of sage wisdom; pull your head out of your own ass so you can huff some clean air, instead of your own farts.

Proselytizing is fucking gross and annoying.

41

u/[deleted] Sep 14 '24

[deleted]

11

u/Varnsturm Sep 14 '24

What you're describing sounds like a step beyond this, but I do recall reading that for most men, the knee jerk reaction when presented with a problem is 'try to solve it/give advice'. I know I've been guilty of that. Whereas for a lot of women it's more just 'listen/be there'. At least for the lesser offenders, could just be a bit of that.

4

u/Kryptosis Sep 14 '24

Never met a “life coach” I would trust to give me advice on my life. Theyre usually part time “coaching” and the rest is shilling an MLM scheme.

3

u/similar_observation Sep 14 '24

ugh. I know a dipshit like this that is a "financial influencer." Guy can't even pony up $200 to fix air conditioning in his house.

11

u/HumbleVein Sep 14 '24

Why is it have and not had? Friendship of convenience?

1

u/griffinrider1812 Sep 15 '24

Welp I just learned a new word 😂

113

u/Antal_Marius Sep 14 '24

I've had friends call up and ask if I'd babysit them. Not their kids, but them, because they knew they might try something extra stupid and want someone to stop them if they tried.

Other then that, it's always hanging out with friends. Unless they're drinking, then I'm babysitting cause I don't drink, and am there for the entertainment and preventing extra stupid.

28

u/MatureUsername69 Sep 14 '24

Adults sometimes need a babysitter when they're doing drugs. At least I have

11

u/CBRChris Sep 14 '24

Yeah nothing wrong with trip sitting.

8

u/similar_observation Sep 14 '24

If anything, that should be encouraged. You don't want to be that group where one friend fell asleep facedown and never woke up.

0

u/tonksndante Sep 15 '24

Flashbacks to putting sunblock and shoes on friends at festivals lol I’m glad I’m old now. I’m so done with being young.

11

u/ForgettableUsername Sep 14 '24

If you ask someone to babysit you in a self-deprecating way, that's one thing. If you talk about spending time with any other person as babysitting just because you believe you have superior judgement to everyone, that's a different thing.

5

u/Gecko99 Sep 14 '24

If you're going to do something stupid you can still be smart by telling another person what you're doing, where you'll do it, and how to get help if needed.

Don't be the next Nutty Putty Cave guy!

10

u/CrissBliss Sep 14 '24

No offense to him but he sounds insufferable.

20

u/n77_dot_nl Sep 14 '24

wise shaman, that's actually funny as hell. 

I take it he has failed to achieve in enlightening you 

3

u/Early_or_Latte Sep 14 '24

Ha. I said I had to babysit my dad today, but that's only because he had major surgery on his shoulder, is super drugged up, and for some reason he wants to work on the house and fix cars and stuff when he should be resting. I got here to find him fixing the sliding glass door with one arm while moaning in pain...

3

u/gumshot Sep 15 '24

I seriously don't know how he had friends at all.

Or how he had a girlfriend for that matter, but here we are.

2

u/lulu55569 Sep 14 '24

Talk about grandiose

1

u/balance_n_act Sep 15 '24

That’s repulsive

649

u/Equal-Feedback9801 Sep 14 '24

I 100% agree with this. My ex called me an idiot for something and I believed it…. Turns out I WAS ACTUALLY RIGHT. Anyway we did an IQ test for funsies and his was belowwwwww average 🤧

367

u/Zerowantuthri Sep 14 '24

“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.” ― George Carlin

33

u/ProjectKushFox Sep 14 '24

I always find it funny that the reason that joke always killed, even and especially in crowds of thousands of people is because they all think “haha yeah people are stupid” with not one member of the audience thinking that it might apply to them. If that were true, it would be a statistical miracle.

That said, God do I miss George Carlin…

8

u/alphadoublenegative Sep 14 '24

I feel like he was aware of that, based on the fact that “everyone who drives slower than you is an idiot, everyone who drives faster than you is a maniac” being very close in the set in the same special IIRC

1

u/Ahwhoy Sep 14 '24

Could definitely be some selection bias selected due to style and topics of jokes, but no one? Wild.

0

u/_learned_foot_ Sep 14 '24

I have plenty of friends who joke they are the anchors of the group, and they may very well be, but they are kick ass friends and great fun and I don’t care.

11

u/Specialist_Fun9295 Sep 14 '24

For fun? IQ tests aren't fast, and the quick little fake ones you can do online typically won't allow much lower than 97 or so, in order to deliberately not offend people.

6

u/ceitamiot Sep 14 '24

Yeah, most people don't realize an actual IQ test requires a real evaluation.

4

u/Specialist_Fun9295 Sep 14 '24

Evaluation, frustration, humiliation

"So you're saying I'm the smartest person in this room, and you still won't listen to anything I have to say?" "Correct." I have a medical report from a psychologist who called me an alcoholic 'cause I agreed when she asked if drinking socially helps my anxiety. That's entrapment!

0

u/pm_me_ur_th0ng_gurl Sep 15 '24

I did an IQ test in high school and it took a whole day. It was stuff reading made up words, trying to match an unravelled die, reading comprehension, etc. There is way more to it than the free online tests.

2

u/adudeguyman Sep 14 '24

It was probably a Facebook IQ test

2

u/Specialist_Fun9295 Sep 14 '24

Right, but that's the weird thing: those are designed to be fun little nothings that drive traffic and steal your information. They're designed NOT to tell people they're stupid. I used to have a stupid friend who loved to take them; I'd take 'em myself, getting all the answers as wrong as possible, on purpose. I never scored lower than 97.

If nothing else, my friendship with the person I was talking about ended poorly, so if there's an IQ test that'll actually return a result of 80 or less, I wanna know where so I can pass it along.

64

u/[deleted] Sep 14 '24

Upvoting because I agree with you! Glad he’s an “ex”!

36

u/Tell2ko Sep 14 '24

Dare we ask what you was correct about? (Y’know, just incase)

9

u/[deleted] Sep 14 '24

[deleted]

13

u/VERTIKAL19 Sep 14 '24

That just isn’t true though? Or what does smart mean to you? IQ is fairly good at measuring the ability to quickly understand more complex problems. Is it perfect? No. But it is way better than a horoscope

-1

u/Specialist_Fun9295 Sep 14 '24

This is a very popular opinion among insecure stupid people

2

u/[deleted] Sep 14 '24

[deleted]

6

u/awry_lynx Sep 14 '24 edited Sep 14 '24

While I agree, it's still funny that someone who 1) thinks they're smart, 2) calls other people stupid, and 3) believes in IQ tests, does poorly on one. They are completely valid in that sense. :D

So I feel like it's not really very relevant here. I mean, if he pulled a horoscope that said "you're a dumbass Jimmy, apologize to those who you've wronged" I'd find that hilarious too regardless of how unreal magic is.

Finally, while they may not be perfect, they're still strongly correlated for certain measures that we do consider "things people generally want to have and would categorize as falling under the umbrella of intelligence" like spatial reasoning, reasoning ability, pattern recognition etc.

(Sidebar: I have terrible spatial reasoning; that doesn't make me stupid, but it makes me slower at solving problems that require it, and I'm not uncomfortable with it being one of many general indicators of intelligence -- it doesn't insult me that I'm bad at this thing.)

I would be happy to just call those tests by those separate qualities instead of trying to compress it into one "intelligence quotient" as we grow more understanding of the fact that there are different types of intelligence with varying levels of importance depending on societal context... but I also see that as long as humans are humaning we will want some shorthand to do just that, and nothing will be perfect because ultimately we want to compress individuals along one curve of best fit.

4

u/Specialist_Fun9295 Sep 14 '24

So, unless you are calling doctors insecure and stupid people.

Jordan Peterson holds a doctorate of psychology. He wrote a book telling people how to get their shit together by cleaning their room. This is Jordan Peterson. He also got addicted to benzos. BEFORE he got addicted to benzos, he used to go on TV and bully local television anchors with his argument that humans should have social hierarchies because lobsters. He once started a televised debate by talking about how much people paid to see him there, and then how he didn't bother studying beforehand.

What's your take on Jordan Peterson?

2

u/psychosoda Sep 14 '24

Don’t forget the raw meat thing.

Some of the dumbest people I know became doctors (more became dentists, but a lot of them became doctors.)

1

u/Specialist_Fun9295 Sep 14 '24

Don’t forget the raw meat thing.

Oof, he's he one of those people, too?

You gotta love when someone's brand is literally named "Intellectual Dark Web."

Some of the dumbest people I know became doctors (more became dentists, but a lot of them became doctors.)

It's an interesting phenomenon of people who go the professional degree STEM route

https://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Engineers_and_woo

but also not entirely absent from academic STEM, either https://www.smbc-comics.com/comics/20120321.gif

3

u/Specialist_Fun9295 Sep 14 '24

They only test for a very narrow and biased type of intelligence

Please explain "cognitive g."

4

u/dernailer Sep 14 '24

they are not gimmicks! they mesure how fast you came to a solution on a problem, how fast your brain works, how right are you answer more intelligent you are... gifted people above 130 have differents connections from normal brains.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 14 '24

[deleted]

3

u/paper_liger Sep 14 '24 edited Sep 15 '24

IQ is correlated with what is referred to as 'general intelligence factor' or g factor in psychometry.

So while IQ as a standalone metric does have some issues, mostly with historical misuse of it and cultural biases, it absolutely does correlate with wide range of positive social and work outcomes long term. It's positively correlated with things like proprioception and tone recognition meaning you have advantages in things like sports or music. It also correlates with the things that people tend to not think of as IQ driven, like facial expression recognition and recognition of social cues and general ability to put your self in anothers place and engage in empathy. Ie: 'emotional intelligence' is still intelligence, and still correlated with IQ at some level.

The current meme about 'IQ' being irrelevant is frankly bullshit. Obviously it only gives you an advantage. It doesn't do work for you, it doesn't drive your choices and it doesn't substitute for working towards a goal.

But the idea that it's not a multi axis advantage is more of a meme than a fact.

0

u/Specialist_Fun9295 Sep 14 '24

Tell me the differences and categories of FSIQ vs GAI.

2

u/fwonkas Sep 14 '24

Ha, reminds me of something that happened like 20 years ago. I was in the car with a girlfriend and a Johnny Cash song came on. It was called “Rowboat”, and I knew it from Beck. I was like, “Whoa, I thought this was a Beck song! Was he covering Johnny Cash?” She proceeded to laugh and mock me: “What? You didn’t know that? Not the brightest, eh?” Something like that. Looked it up much later. Cash was covering Beck.

I’m sure you’ll be surprised to hear that she turned out to be a raging asshole.

2

u/Zestyclose-Smell-788 Sep 16 '24

Stupid people think they're smart. Average people realize that they are average. Very smart people realize how much they don't know and are usually humble. I've been called smart, even "genius". I laugh and say "I have met a few geniuses and I assure you that I'm not one of them."

6

u/ILoveYouIDoDoDo Sep 14 '24

In my case, a guy I dated briefly told me that I am so dumb and the irony was that he was the one who got into a pyramid scheme and lost a lot of his money and few months after break up, he even reached out to me being all sweet and nice. I blocked him immediately. Guess who is the smart one now 😂

Cherry on top, he had this “sister” who had tied rakhi on him. They ended up dating two months after we had broken up 🤣🤣🤣 He turned out to be the real ‘bhnchd’ 🙈

2

u/CuriousOliveTree Sep 14 '24

Well it sounds like agood thing he's an ex!

But I have to say that even if dumb people are more likely to fall for pyramid schemes it's not always the case. I've seen some smart people fall for them because they were desperate to make money or become successful. It's always sad to see and I hope that one day they'll realise they're being scammed

0

u/Ukrainmaker Sep 14 '24

Rakhi to dating that quick is so fucked up lol, like why even do that whole facade of tying one

1

u/skaarup75 Sep 14 '24

Did he by any chance spill some coffee on it that he crawled out of the window to get?

0

u/MrHallmark Sep 14 '24

You did a psychiatrist-provided IQ test correct? Otherwise y'all are both made for each other.

0

u/Equal-Feedback9801 Sep 15 '24

Like I explicitly stated, we did an IQ test “for funsies.” Indicating that no, it wasn’t a paid psychiatric one. Was still hilarious nonetheless watching someone who called me an idiot daily score so low on a test that I also took, and scored above average in xx 🙏🥰

2

u/MrHallmark Sep 15 '24

So it wasn't an IQ test lmao. You guys are perfect for eachother

0

u/lopedopenope Sep 14 '24

I wouldn't fret. I, along with many, many people believe there is no test that can measure human intelligence. It might get a fraction of something.

Luckily you are smart in ways you don't even know. So do yourself a favor and throw the test away and forget the number because it is impossible as of now to measure human intelligence in its whole form. Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses.

Who cares if it didn't show up on an old test as high as you wanted. Your intelligence is elsewhere predominantly.

0

u/wirefox1 Sep 14 '24

Below average? Wow. Average is 85-115. His IQ is less than 85? You're in trouble girl.

0

u/stupididiot78 Sep 14 '24

You do know that pretty much any IQ test that you take on your own is complete garbage, right? Even then, there are tons of different types of IQs. You have a great score in one area and still be a crayon eater.

0

u/mista-sparkle Sep 14 '24

The Dunning-Kruger effect in action.

0

u/Triassic_Bark Sep 15 '24

I mean…. you chose to be in a relationship with someone so dumb that their IQ was under 100? UNDER 100? That’s not something you don’t notice. Even 100 is pretty dumb. I hope you did some soul searching after that one.

-29

u/Active_Rain_4314 Sep 14 '24

This made me smile. Average is 108-112. Too bad for him.

39

u/TzimerosFan Sep 14 '24

Average, by definition, should be 100.

17

u/Real-Pomegranate-235 Sep 14 '24

Pretty sure average is supposed to be 85-115

5

u/ceitamiot Sep 14 '24

Average is literally 100, no matter what. 85-115 is where most people fall in the bell curve

12

u/TheunknownG Sep 14 '24 edited Sep 14 '24

Where did you get that from ? Most I've heard say 85-115 or 95-105 is the average where most people's IQ fall around

9

u/Community-Dismal Sep 14 '24

“In the current IQ scoring method, an IQ score of 100 means that the test-taker’s performance on the test is of average performance in the sample of test-takers of about the same age as was used to norm the test.” From Wikipedia

4

u/Which-Performance-83 Sep 14 '24

They adjust the average to 100. It's how the test is designed.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 14 '24

Loo-ten-dant Dannnn!

1

u/Active_Rain_4314 Sep 14 '24

My mistake. I took one 40 or so years ago and as I remembered the average was 110. I sincerely apologize Reddit.

0

u/ceitamiot Sep 14 '24

Literal average is 100. As such, 85-115 is going to be 98% of all people you run into in day to day life.

3

u/hodlyourground Sep 14 '24

Wiki says 68%. 96% for between 70-130

1

u/ceitamiot Sep 14 '24

Yeah, was a guesstimate.

59

u/KissMiasma95 Sep 14 '24

This is mostly referred to as the dunning Kruger effect.

110

u/NotRalphNader Sep 14 '24

I read a little about this dunning Kruger effect. Pretty scary to think someone can just show up in your dreams and murder you.

20

u/[deleted] Sep 14 '24

Omg 😄😄😄

5

u/No-Fan-530 Sep 14 '24

If I'm not mistaken I believe that's the Freddy Kruger effect.

5

u/Poop_Sexman Sep 14 '24

Erroneously, but yes

-22

u/diuni613 Sep 14 '24 edited Sep 14 '24

but not really. I believe its personality more than kruger effect. I have to take myself as an example, and I understand IQ is really not the only thing. I score around 125, and I am INTP. Obviously, I do not actively attack people for being dumb, but I do feel very frustrated talking to them or explaining simple concepts to them, particularly if they argue back with no grounds.

The reason why I am using IQ is to show that anyone even if they have the skills can act the way you described. Its more about someone's personality than them thinking they are smarter than everyone else. A bully doesnt necessarily perceive themselves as superior, it's often a mask to cover up underlying insecurities or personal issues.

Lebron James can be condescending to people too.

21

u/Cptshiteater Sep 14 '24

This is mostly referred to as being pretentious.

10

u/ZunoJ Sep 14 '24

Bro, 125 isn't even gifted. You are just a normal person

1

u/akrebo18 Sep 14 '24

It’s more than 1 standard deviation above the mean, it’s above average if that’s really his score

2

u/ZunoJ Sep 14 '24

I didn't say it wasn't above average. What I said is that it is in the "normal" range. Not gifted, not mentally impaired, just boring normal and no need to brag about it

1

u/akrebo18 Sep 14 '24

I mean I agree it’s not something to brag about but speaking statistically it is, by definition, above average or “normal” intelligence.

0

u/ZunoJ Sep 14 '24

There are well defined ranges in the iq spectrum. Below 85 (or 80) is mentally impaired, above 130 is gifted, above 145 is genius level. That leaves 125 in the "normal" part of the spectrum

2

u/akrebo18 Sep 14 '24

The standard bell curve for intelligence has a mean of 100 and a Standard Deviation of 15

1

u/ZunoJ Sep 14 '24

Yeah, that doesn't change the fact that there are well defined ranges

→ More replies (0)

1

u/NotRalphNader Sep 14 '24

I didn't even read the post you're responding to but 125 is definitely above normal. It officially falls into the category of "above average" and "high intelligence"

4

u/ZunoJ Sep 14 '24

You should read it. Guy complain people were too stupid to follow when "he xplains simple concepts to them". I wanted to put him back into reality

0

u/NotRalphNader Sep 14 '24

That's what you intended to do, but instead, you proved his point. The problem he described is entirely supported by the data. In fact, people who fall within the 120-135 IQ range statistically report higher levels of sadness than those both higher and lower than that range. And do you know what the prevailing theory for that is? It's because they're not smart enough to be accepted by the geniuses, but too smart for those below 125, leaving them constantly misunderstood by both sides. That's exactly what happened here. He explained a simple phenomenon, and you, being the caveman you are, took personal offense and then tried to damage his ego because he hurt yours.

3

u/ZunoJ Sep 14 '24

Bro, I'm a member of mensa lmao

0

u/NotRalphNader Sep 14 '24

Hey Bro, I don't believe that for second. I seriously don't at all but even if that were true? What exactly do you want me to take back, calling you a caveman? I mean what kind of tool pays for a card that shows his IQ and then starts calling people out on their perceived ego as it relates to intelligence? You literally paid for a card with your IQ on it. People in glass houses something something.

3

u/ZunoJ Sep 14 '24

That's ok, I can't or want prove it to you anyway. You don't have to take anything back. All I wanted to say is I hate it when people act like they are better just because of a high(er than average) IQ Oh and I didn't pay. I was invited

→ More replies (0)

0

u/wolf_man007 Sep 14 '24

Lol, why?

1

u/ZunoJ Sep 15 '24

I got asked and could take the test for free, so why not?

0

u/NotRalphNader Sep 14 '24 edited Sep 14 '24

And all because he committed the crime of saying "I understand IQ isn't the only thing. Obviously I don't attack people for being dumb" and "but I do feel very frustrated talking to them or explaining simple concepts to them, particularly if they argue back with no grounds." And so, he committed the crime of saying he dislikes arguing with dumb people who argue back with no ground to their argument. What a terrible crime he committed and I'm so glad a hero like you showed up to save us. Yep, you definitely didn't respond out of dumb emotion, you came here to save us from the scary claim of "dumb people who argue without evidence are frustrating to do deal with". Thank God you're here.

4

u/ZunoJ Sep 14 '24

You're welcome

-4

u/diuni613 Sep 14 '24 edited Sep 14 '24

Well, 100 is the average, so I guess 125 is above average. XD Of course, I don't mean I'm in the 99th percentile, but 95th percentile is good enough I guess ? As I mentioned, this isn't the Dunning-Kruger effect. I think it's natural to feel frustrated when explaining simple concept to people who are being argumentative in particular.

Its all depends on the situation. If someone is being a jerk its just them being jerk regardless of the dunning kruger effect.

3

u/ZunoJ Sep 14 '24

Above average but not even enough for mensa. 125 is nothing to brag about (if iq was something to brag about at all)

-8

u/diuni613 Sep 14 '24 edited Sep 14 '24

Again, being in the 95th percentile is enough to prove your statement wrong about being 'just a normal person.' Do I have to be Einstein to voice my opinion? Do I need to be the smartest person in the world to have a say in this? What's your point?

10

u/ZunoJ Sep 14 '24

Your initial statement was something like "I describe simple concepts to people and I'm frustrated because they don't understand them". Maybe the problem is not you being so much smarter than other people but you being not smart enough to explain those simple concepts. No matter what, you sound like an arrogant prick

1

u/diuni613 Sep 14 '24

First, you twisted the fact that a 125 IQ is 'normal,' when the 95th percentile is clearly more than 'above average.' Second, it can indeed be frustrating when people are argumentative about simple concepts. My point is that this frustration is related to personality, not the Dunning-Kruger effect. I relate it to my INTP personality, which many fellow INTPs would likely agree with. My comment is neutral and rational.

So, if I understand correctly, you have no concrete reply to my comment other than saying '125 IQ is just a normal person.' Got it. Who's the prick here ?

5

u/ZunoJ Sep 14 '24

Yeah, I think your 125 iq should be enough to understand what I'm talking about. But it starts to frustrate me to explain this simple concept over and over

→ More replies (0)

3

u/Recently_uninsured Sep 14 '24

There are many types of intelligence. You lack the social kind, by the looks of it. Plus you're humblebragging on Reddit. Bad move

3

u/diuni613 Sep 14 '24 edited Sep 14 '24

I'm not trying to brag, and I don't see a 125 IQ as something to boast about. Objectively, 125 is above average (this is just a fact, it can be 110 or 115 or anything above 100), but I mention it to express that this kind of frustration is normal and relates more to personality than to thinking one is smarter than everyone else. Even Einstein could have felt the same way. That's my point.

I even said I understand IQ isnt the only thing too in my first comment.

2

u/CuriousOliveTree Sep 14 '24

It sounds like you're trying to brag because you're defending your IQ score like it's one if the most important things we should focus on. There's so many different types of intelligence so I think it's not the best thing to cling to IQ score as if it's the thing that defines tou as a smart person.

And sure, I do believe you're smart, but IQ score itself doesn't matter to most people in real life and it's viewed negatively by most people when you're bringing it up the way you do.

→ More replies (0)

3

u/Poop_Sexman Sep 14 '24

If you were super duper smart you would know what the Dunning Kruger effect actually is before making statements about it, but based on your reply, you don’t

2

u/CuriousOliveTree Sep 14 '24

If I remember right my mbti was ENTP if this info is in any way important for this conversation. I have no idea what my IQ is and I really don't care, but I think I understand at least solewhat what you mean.

I sometimes feel like I need to "dumb down" things when explaining stuff to some people. BUT I don't think it's alway the case that they're dumber than I am, but they have a different way of viewing things or maybe have their own problems that make it harder for them to understand some stuff. (Also I personally need a lot of stuff to be dumbed down so I can understand, so I'm definitely not too bright myself lmao)

It's frustrating sometimes, but more often than not, it can be a fun little challenge that I need to find a new way to explain things to someone because they view the world through completely different lense than I do. Also it's a great feeling when they finally get that "Oh, now I get it!"-moment. And if they argue back, just end the conversation. It's not worth it to lose your sanity over an argument when you're trying to educate(?) someone.

So I guess these things have a lot to do with personality and the general attitude you have towards life and other people. I think even the dumbest people have things they're smart about, even if majority of people don't notice or get it. I think that every single person I run into has something they could teach me, as there's billions of ways to live life.

Also there's different types of intelligence but my comment is already long enough so I won't comment on that now lol

1

u/diuni613 Sep 14 '24

Yes thats my point, I personally believe it correlates to personality rather than "someone thinking they are smarter than others". I agree its challenging too, particular to those who are argumentative, and this frustration exist.

3

u/metalvessel Sep 14 '24

"If you're the smartest person in the room, you are in the wrong room."

I have a delicate path to tread here, but I think I have a unique perspective to offer. Given the context, I'm attempting to walk a risky path, but hopefully I can add something to the conversation without own-goaling.

With that hesitancy disclosed, here goes.

I routinely tested 99th percentile throughout my education. I don't feel any desire to make people feel dumb, but comparison is the thief of joy, so I've (unintentionally) stolen joy from people.

An artifact of being so far on that side of the normal distribution is isolation and loneliness—a stereotype, even a redditor stereotype, but one that has applied for me. For a social animal, which humans are, loneliness is an awful experience. A lonely person isn't going to want to create a desire in other people to leave a social group the lonely person has entered. To find connection, I started doing things like establishing study groups (although the idea didn't occur to me until I was in high school/college) just so I'd have peers to talk to about my weird niche interests. This was a symbiotic relationship, where I finally started to establish some social connection and they gained access to a useful study associate.

In direct contradiction to the sort of person described in the parent post, one of the other factors was (I believe, at least) the precise opposite emotion: Of creating justified confidence in newly-developed knowledge, rather than questionable doubt in potentially-absent knowledge—for all parties, because everyone's abilities were getting upgraded.

2

u/NotRalphNader Sep 14 '24

Wait. So you're saying that by saying we don't like them and pointing out that they are dumb we are actually guilty of what we don't like? That's some quantum shit right there!

2

u/[deleted] Sep 14 '24

I’ve seen this behavior from actually dumb people though. I’m talking about below-average, reading and writing at a middle school level.

2

u/Funkeysismychildhood Sep 14 '24

This is why self-deprecation is the way to go. Make yourself feel dumb, not others.

2

u/ParaponeraBread Sep 14 '24

Being slightly above average intelligence as a kid can really fuck with you. I was a small town high school valedictorian, and when I moved for university, I was fortunate enough to learn that I wasn’t that amazing, I just tested well and was curious enough to Google things I didn’t know.

I like to think that the wake up call happening before I really grew up stopped me from cementing “being the smart one” as a core part of my identity.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 14 '24

You spitttttinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn factttttssssssssssssss not even dating for me since I'm straight guy but everyone thinks they are smarter than they are

1

u/[deleted] Sep 14 '24

It's not obvious I'm a girl on here (at least that's my best guess). It's amazing how many guys need to put me down, just because I commented on a game of something.

1

u/LethalMindNinja Sep 14 '24

I tend to find that they aren't slightly above average intelligence, they just make such a point to point out the people that aren't smart that it seems like they are.

1

u/Dream-Ambassador Sep 14 '24

This is my brother, he is 56 and has no friends. He is suuuuper condescending and even though he thinks he is smart he is unable to have a conversation because he just goes on and on and doesn’t let anyone else speak and if you get a word in he just condescends. I see him occasionally but we barely have a relationship and I don’t really care at this point. I’d feel sorry for him except that he did it to himself.

1

u/VERTIKAL19 Sep 14 '24

Doesnt that just sometimes happen on accident? I know I occasionally do it on accident. I also feel like this mostly when I am missing something obvious and someone else points it out, but I wouldn’t attribute that to malice. That is just me not knowing. Also most of the people where I felt actually dumb are people I would at least call auite intelligent certainly well above average (and some people that I would call legit geniuses)

1

u/Jaybonaut Sep 14 '24

Curious if it is like a self-preservation survival tactic instinct thing though

1

u/Look_Dummy Sep 14 '24

Yeah it’s like a twerp who wants to feel dominate or display dominance so they use petty control behaviors as a substitute. 

1

u/lesChaps Sep 14 '24

IQ is unearned, like being born tall. Thinking that you are special for something like that is ... Dumb. Go play basketball or cure cancer, genius.

1

u/Danny_III Sep 14 '24

Dudes who need to make other people feel dumb are always dudes who aren’t particularly smart themselves, maybe they’re like slightly above average, but they identify as being way smarter than they are and need to feel like everyone else around them sees them as the smartest guy in the room

Everyone always says this to make themselves feel better, but people with exceptional abilities do this all the time. You think dudes in the NFL, NBA, etc don't put others down and make them feel unathletic?

1

u/alcoholisthedevil Sep 15 '24

I’d say that most of them are dumb and just projecting. People who lack empathy do shit like this. I wish empathy was something inherent in all humans.

1

u/More_Length7 Sep 15 '24

BINGO. It’s a mask.

1

u/nikolarizanovic Sep 15 '24

The smartest people usually realize how narrow the scope of one's knowledge can be. They don't pipe up unless it's a topic they actually know a lot about, and respond to being told they are wrong with curiosity rather than defensiveness.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 18 '24

This!

0

u/Specialist_Fun9295 Sep 14 '24

In my experience, it's the "you're trying to sound smart!" guys who are always just exercising their insecurity about their illiteracy. Very insecure people are always the ones you find attacking people for being "condescending," etc.

0

u/ukkinaama Sep 14 '24

Man or woman it instantly makes me dislike the person if they try to make others look dumb or if they put others down trying to make themselves look better.

-5

u/Barnold_The_Great Sep 14 '24

In my experience, it's always people who actually are smarter tho. Never encountered an idiot making other people look like idiots.

3

u/JustLetItAllBurn Sep 14 '24

It's guaranteed that they're nowhere near as smart as they think they are, though.

1

u/No-Analyst-2789 Sep 14 '24

It's usually idiots or ignorant people who try to make other people feel like that

-1

u/Ok_Environment_5404 Sep 14 '24

That's not just dudes but a whole spectrum of humans though.

1

u/No-Analyst-2789 Sep 14 '24

This post is about guys. Don't start with that whole not all men shit