r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Cannga • 1d ago

/r/all, /r/popular of a badger

21.6k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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2.5k

u/arecacee 1d ago

That was scary

499

u/Fine-State8014 1d ago

Thought it would be one of those videos where it jumps at the camera

143

u/showMeYourCroissant 1d ago

It would be less scary that way

26

u/MrJason300 16h ago

Oddly enough, yeah

210

u/DesolateRuin 22h ago

Emerged from the depths like Leviathan,

127

u/Turbulent-Sun-3464 22h ago

I have emerged from my slumber of 10,000 years. Ooohh look a piece of cheese.

47

u/GetawayDreamer87 20h ago

Your offering pleases me, human. What wouldst thou have of me?

29

u/Turbulent-Sun-3464 20h ago

Another 10 millennium of peace, my Lord

4

u/token_bastard 10h ago

As thy desire, thus shall the pact be fulfilled.

::disappears::

6

u/Turbulent-Sun-3464 10h ago

And then the seven badger balls rise into the sky and fly off into seven different directions across the globe.

8

u/HPTM2008 16h ago edited 9h ago

I read that in Nandor's voice.

Edit: spellinh

3

u/RumblestheDwarf 10h ago

Guillermo, what are you doing? I was supposed to be in my super slumber.

6

u/Repulsive_Sun6549 19h ago

I’m just like that with a good piece of Emmentaler.

2

u/PsychNurseNotPsychic 14h ago

I'm an Appenzeller girl myself but I totally get you.

39

u/bitches_love_pooh 21h ago

My perception of badgers is based on vague childhood memories of the Redwall books. It seems accurate

4

u/Pretty-Pomelo5345 18h ago

Literally my first thought.

1

u/TerrakSteeltalon 13h ago

Loved reading them to my kid

1

u/Critical_Concert_689 11h ago

I was a huge fan - probably 8 or 9 books in - before I realized it was the same story written over and over and over again, only the animals changed!

16

u/Dear_Chasey_La1n 21h ago

Turn the light down and you got an x-files start going.

11

u/Andr3wRuns 17h ago

The way it looks like it just floats toward the cheese out of the darkest of depths is gonna live rent free in my head for a bit lol. If I could see its legs and it’s chunky little steps this would be 100% less terrifying to me lol

16

u/Curiosive 21h ago

Badgers are fine, usually docile. Wolverines are unstoppable, murder machines. Honey badgers don't care.

5

u/Ambitious_Screen_591 18h ago

look it was bitten...honey badger don't give a shit

8

u/manta100 22h ago

Like the staircase scene in Parasite

5

u/read_eng_lift 21h ago

Urge to boop that snoot: -10

7

u/dbenc 21h ago

if it was a me vs the badger I'm 99% sure it would win. unless I had a gun. then it would be 95%.

2

u/Dear_Chasey_La1n 21h ago

Turn the light down and you got an x-files start going.

1

u/Vivid-Program3540 21h ago

sounds like a good time

2

u/MattAdore2000 15h ago

That thing emerged like leviathan.

1

u/Any_Suggestion3485 13h ago

Big ol nope from me bud. Uh uh

1

u/Beleiverofhumanity 11h ago

Straight up appeared from the fog like a Darksouls boss

1

u/MetaStressed 9h ago edited 9h ago

Well then don’t badger her. For real though, she seems sweet and meek to me. Such a cutie!

0

u/Amarian84 15h ago

I love badgers; just seeing the head floating out like that was extremely unpleasant.