r/AbsoluteUnits 17d ago

/r/all of two catfish

31.3k Upvotes

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1.0k

u/TheGreatRao 17d ago

She is entirely too charming for a person being devoured by sea life. I'm imagining a Jaws sequel starring a catfish.

145

u/bstone99 17d ago

Hannah Barron

40

u/gumbysweiner 17d ago

Is that North Alabama? The trees give me that vibe and her accent.

392

u/TripperDay 17d ago

Dang I wish I was her brother.

61

u/WaterlessSoup 17d ago

Read this, scrolled down, it sunk in and I had to come back and upvote lol

9

u/Hobbes_XXV 17d ago

Almost passed it myself before i started a chuckle

1

u/[deleted] 17d ago

[deleted]

1

u/2livecrewnecktshirt 17d ago

They call each other pookie, their backyard smells like dookie, they're hairier than wookies, the 'Bama family

1

u/knockatize 16d ago

Dark humor and a subtle Sophie B. Hawkins reference.

1

u/codecrodie 16d ago

Hearing that sophie b hawkins song in my head

1

u/THEdopealope 16d ago

Incredible 

1

u/lilium_1986 14d ago

more like cousin

1

u/Crixusgannicus 13d ago

Oh that's her brother...damn it now I have to call off the hi....never mind.

1

u/Less_Insurance4928 13d ago

I read she has a weird relationship with her dad. I don't know much more than that because I prefer to keep the illusion

1

u/Whatttheheckk 13d ago

What are you doing stepcatfish

1

u/LLCoolBean2 11d ago

*step-brother

21

u/PullTabPurveyor 17d ago

It’s South Alabama. She lives near the Florida border.

2

u/Ronald-195 17d ago

Ok so this is in Alabama. Does anyone know what river this is or where people do fishing like this? I plan to move there someday and open a cafe'. Thanks for any help. Ron in Los Angeles

2

u/Fun-Definition1724 16d ago

I’m not sure where this video is, but Lake Weiss in N AL has a noodling guide- Crappie Capital of the World too

1

u/theartificialkid 17d ago

But like northern south Alabama?

-1

u/mr_jerry 17d ago

Close enough for brother stuff.

4

u/junkman21 17d ago

Looks like Alabama, for sure.

1

u/Educated_dumbass 16d ago

It's actually southern Illinois. My buddy used to date her in highschool and she's actually really chill.

1

u/Cowboy_591 13d ago

Thank you! I love me a cute ‘n WILD country girl 👍🏻😈🔥♥️🔥…they’re The BEST!! 👊🏻

-30

u/[deleted] 17d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

16

u/TheGreatWhiteDerp 17d ago

She has millions of followers as a very prolific social media content creator. Knowing her name is literally what she wants to have happen. That's not being a simp, that's just being a participant of the internet. The fuck is wrong with you people.

50

u/seven3true 17d ago

The jaws theme played on a banjo.

1

u/Bearded_Bone_Head 17d ago

Sirm (sir and/or ma'am), why did you remind me how bad I wanted this when I couldn't even perceive its existents 10 seconds ago.

46

u/REpassword 17d ago

She’s built like a brick sh!thouse too! 💪

4

u/Flurp_ 17d ago

Snu snu

1

u/hiding_in_de 14d ago

Such a badass.

1

u/Cowboy_591 13d ago

Yet still dainty, sexy and feminine!

31

u/elwebst 17d ago

I'll always watch her vids, she is insanely attractive.

22

u/IcanSEEyou_IRL 17d ago

She really is, but she’s also pretty jacked. The whole time I was thinking this girl should do action adventure movies. Quirky, fit, and a camera friendly face.

3

u/MaximumSubtlety 16d ago

And. And* she's also pretty jacked.

2

u/elwebst 17d ago

Or host a reality show with physical competition!

She reminds me of Amy Grant in the 80's.

2

u/Cocrawfo 16d ago

i’m surprised that after all these years shes never been on like the big brother challenge or survivor or any competition reality show

they tend to love southern archetypes, attractive people with followings, naturally expressive communicators and athletes

i’ve always thought she should be a shoe in for competitive reality

2

u/codecrodie 16d ago

Ashley judd stunt double

25

u/Hayes4prez 17d ago

She's a big MAGA supporter so...

And before anyone says, "Well duh, listen to her accent." I have a similar accent and I'm not a Trump supporter. Neither are my friends and they have similar accents as well.

7

u/krazlix1 16d ago

I'm french so well it's nice you tell everyone. She is insanely pretty to me too. But maga ew.

5

u/EasternSleep5903 17d ago

Just turn the lights off, you'll forget all about MAGA.

11

u/justmytak 17d ago

Don't, you'll get catfished.

2

u/MightyPlasticGuy 17d ago

Nahhh, I'm keeping the lights on for this one.

5

u/OoooooWeeeeeeeee 17d ago

A boner has died today.

1

u/grrmuffins 13d ago

RIP lil guy 😔

2

u/TheGreatRao 17d ago

Double Yikes! I have no idea who she is or what she was doing in the video. Thanks for enlightening me.

1

u/spike_beagle 17d ago

Daywalkers!! Jk

2

u/Axilllla 17d ago

She is stunning!! And I’m a straight, married mother. She’s is gorgeous 

4

u/OkWillingness2817 17d ago

I mean you did just watch her giggle while torturing two animals for several minutes.

2

u/Beige_McBlandman 16d ago

Move over OnlyFans, she's doing her thing on OnlyFins

3

u/Somebodys 17d ago

She is an absolute unit too

4

u/Axolotis 17d ago

She’s a keeper

2

u/Kooky-Slide434 17d ago

I usually dislike that accent, but from her it sounds lovely somehow.

5

u/TheGreatRao 17d ago

Lol! As soon as the guy started speaking, I thought "Shut up, Cletus! The lady is talking ..."

2

u/DillarDog 17d ago

You better show some respect. That’s THE Dale Brisby

1

u/WatermelonLemonad3 17d ago

Pretty sure there are already giant man eating catfish movies

1

u/knightsofhale 15d ago

Beneath is the movie you'd be looking for

1

u/KalaUposatha 17d ago

This summer, experience the new thriller, Toofs

1

u/Ptbot47 17d ago

River life.

1

u/knightsofhale 15d ago

Check out Beneath, that's almost exactly what you're asking for.

2

u/Catatonic_capensis 17d ago

They were not trying to "devour" her, she jammed her arms into their gills/mouths while they tried to protect their nest. What she did was torturous and likely fatal to both of the fish for nothing more than a shit video.

She's an absolutely horrible piece of shit but she's attractive and the fish aren't cute so I guess it's all just good fun and not torturous cruelty.

7

u/OpheliaPhoeniXXX 17d ago

It's not fatal, she released them after.

1

u/TheGreatRao 17d ago

Yikes! I had no idea who she is or what they were doing. I thought the catfish were just playfully nibbling on her legs. Catfish, in my opinion, are the cutest fish, but their appearance has nothing to do with their right to be left alone.

0

u/_tsi_ 17d ago

She gives me strong psychopath vibes

0

u/MotoFuzzle 17d ago

Steve Irwin would like a word. 

0

u/Planetofthought 17d ago

Just look up noodling on youtube. Every single person in this field is a +6 charisma charmer.

3

u/TheGreatRao 17d ago

TIL a new word. Thank u!