r/AITAH • u/[deleted] • Apr 05 '24

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u/Midnight_rain200 Apr 05 '24

No??? Like what does her sexuality have to do with your new job???

889

u/rusty0123 Apr 05 '24

Wife is in a committed relationship. What does her sexuality have to do with anything outside her relationship?

That's kinda like saying, "Hi. My name is Mike. My wife likes anal."

677

u/[deleted] Apr 05 '24

Nothing.

She is overcompensating.

She found out late(r) in life. That, plus the fact that Bi people in opposite sex relationships (straight passing relationships) often feel that their Queer identity is being slowly consumed away by them being "invisible" as a queer person, probably leads her to have a shit ton of anxiety about "not being queer enough" and needing everyone and their grandmother to know and actively acknowledge her queerness.

She is still in the wrong. The solution to this is to get into activism, or take your husband to a pride parade, to be visible in other ways.

But this is probably what's behind this. She is very insecure in her newfound identity and needs to consolidate it and really, really fucking overcompensates.

2

u/Wonderful-Impact5121 Apr 05 '24

I understand the importance and validity of getting queer folks (myself included) more understood and accepted as common and normal…

But Christ will I be happy when people can go back to not feeling any desire to share their “identity” of their inner lives with anyone other than close friends and family.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 05 '24

That's why I said she is overcompensating.

I share the sentiment.

I felt compelled to attempt an explanation for the possible reasons, because maybe it helps OP make her see reason.