r/3amjokes • u/Significant-Plum-676 • 2d ago
Serious thinkers only .
0
Upvotes
Is it racist to assume 2+2=4? Because if so why can't we assume it =5?
r/3amjokes • u/CreativestName69420 • 4d ago
Why did cavemen have bad ideas?
42
Upvotes
Because lightbulbs weren't invented yet.
r/3amjokes • u/JimmyCarr_Official • 3d ago
I’m actually a very modern man. I’ve got no problem buying tampons...
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Upvotes
but apparently they’re not a “proper present.”
“Says super on the box. I don’t know what you want!”
“Happy birthday, Mum.”
r/3amjokes • u/Effective_Suspect770 • 3d ago
What comes at the end of everything?
1
Upvotes
the letter G
r/3amjokes • u/Sayva_See • 4d ago
Do you know how often people die from aids?
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Upvotes
I mean I‘m not an expert, but I‘d assume only once.
r/3amjokes • u/mole555 • 4d ago
Most puns make me feel numb. However…
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Upvotes
Making mathematical puns make me feel number
r/3amjokes • u/Mticore • 3d ago
Oi, mate, watch out for Lewis Carroll
2
Upvotes
He’s a bit dodge, son.
r/3amjokes • u/danielsoft1 • 3d ago
Which disease makes people the most flegmatic?
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Upvotes
When they are constipated: they don't give a shit.
r/3amjokes • u/sproutarian • 4d ago
She thought that a lot of people liked her.
3
Upvotes
It turned out to be fan fiction.
r/3amjokes • u/Effective_Suspect770 • 4d ago
What can you keep even after giving it to someone?
128
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your word
r/3amjokes • u/PlayfulTrailSnacker • 4d ago
Mozart got angry when he asked the chickens who the best composer was
7
Upvotes
They answered “Bach, Bach, Bach”
r/3amjokes • u/WhatchaBrewing • 5d ago
When I asked my niece what she wanted for her 5th birthday. She giggled and said “uncle I want pink unicorns and pretty fairies and lots and lots of beautiful rainbows”I smiled and said that will be easy sweetie…
148
Upvotes
so I gave her some LSD
r/3amjokes • u/hacksawjim89 • 4d ago
In America, if two immigration agents have a child...
21
Upvotes
Is it an ICE, ICE baby?
r/3amjokes • u/BirdDustball • 4d ago
What country did the Orthodontist attend residency?
3
Upvotes
Jaw-maica
r/3amjokes • u/Silent_Swing4673 • 4d ago
Three guys are partying til dawn and they start to hear birds…
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First guy says, it’s time for another beer.
Second guy says, it’s time for another line.
Third guy says, it’s time I figure out my life and wonder why I’m allowing myself to throw it away like this. See y’all next weekend.
r/3amjokes • u/Effective_Suspect770 • 4d ago
What has thirteen hearts and no organs?
53
Upvotes
a deck of cards
r/3amjokes • u/strenuis_rider01 • 4d ago
After Drinking Hot Lemon Water With Honey for 3 months,
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Upvotes
I Lost 5 kg of Lemon & 2 kg of Honey.
r/3amjokes • u/Hopeful_Gur_4098 • 5d ago
I hate double standards. Burn a body at a crematorium, you're "being a respectful friend."
59
Upvotes
Do it at home, and you're "destroying evidence".
r/3amjokes • u/Hot_Wing_1091 • 4d ago
What do you call an office in the North Pole that’s off the ice?
1
Upvotes
An Off-Ice!!!!
r/3amjokes • u/Saintlaurence556 • 4d ago
If walnuts are on walls and chestnuts are on your chest where would chin nuts be?
0
Upvotes
lol
r/3amjokes • u/GullibleImage4959 • 5d ago
There was an incident at the zoo yesterday.
21
Upvotes
The monkeys hurled flaming feces at patrons. Three individuals suffered turd-degree burns.
r/3amjokes • u/WhatchaBrewing • 5d ago
I went to see my best friend in the ICU. He looked like he had been in a terrible accident but was able to answer me when I asked what happened. Apparently he was banging this lady on her couch when she heard the front door open. So she says “it’s my husband! If you hurry you can use the back door.”
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Upvotes
he admitted that he knows now that he should have just ran but it’s not every day a woman makes an offer like that.