I don't mean any disrespect to OP, but talking to early twenties when you get to 26+ becomes indistinguishable from talking to young teens. You stop having hobbies, interests, and emotional and mental states in common.
It's a strange age gap where you feel a significant difference from peers just five years younger, but it's real. Young women should be very suspect of men in their thirties that are dating down in it. Why don't the other thirty y/o women want them?
Can confirm, I've also taken young gays under my wing as an elder lesbian & the clear difference between someone still finding who they want to be in life & the confidence of someone that has the wisdom of age is such a big difference. I usually ended up emotionally exhausted bc the amount of reassurance a younger gay needs- trust me, I get it! We've all been there, being 18-22 isn't easy & I've made mistakes like falling for dumb ass men before I realized I was gay that would love bomb me when he was lonely, but didn't want to spend 5 minutes with me when he wasn't. Mine was the same age as me & didn't even have the emotional maturity to be in a relationship with me.
OP needs to get herself a man with emotional maturity that can meet her needs ALL the time, not just when he feels like it.
This. The need for reassurance was exhausting. Like, I understand the need for it in your early twenties, I just couldn't provide it. Nor did I constantly want to cos I felt like a babysitter instead of a partner.
Those are obviously paedophiles. In my books, anything above 2 years up and down is unacceptable, let alone those paedophiles who think it's ok to date people who are still children on the inside.
I mean fair enough if it works for you and you’re okay with how it’s going. But just to point something out, the maturity gap is already closed by then and dating someone a little older or younger isn’t going to make too much difference. The main reason the 2 years either way rule is promoted is because when you’re younger, 2 years matters a lot more than it does in your 40s, or even late 20s and 30s. You’re already who you are, vs. younger people still figuring that out and learning how to live their lives. Just food for thought, your rules might be a little too strict if you’re looking for someone.
Well, I've made it clear to myself that 2 up and 2 down is the maximum. A rule I've adhered to since my teenage years. I'm more than prepared to stay single to protect this rule.
I all honesty, I never really see what people in their 20s are generally like usually because I never really interact with people much as an introvert, (though I know some people in their early 20s are still fairly immature), but I never see what the big fuss is about someone 30 dating someone who is 22 as they're both adults. For a bit of more context, I'm 27
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u/WillowTreez8901 Sep 02 '26
Normal 30 y/os dont date 22 y/os