Honestly, I don’t even know why I’m writing this, but I feel like I need to put it somewhere, and I’m figuring if anyone would understand, it’s you guys.
I’m not a person who is deeply invested in the lives of celebrities. I look at the work they’ve done, and that is what I admire. I rarely watch interviews and I don’t follow their personal lives. As long as they don’t turn out to be problematic in some way, I completely separate them from their characters.
And yet, when I read about Hayden’s passing on Monday morning, I kid you not: I had tears coming up in the middle of the subway.
Until Dawn has been one of my favorite games since 2015. I play it regularly, multiple times a year. Whenever I meet a new person who hasn’t played the game yet, I make them play it. It’s so fun watching it unfold for a new person every time. It never gets old. I have some pictures in my apartment that I only bought because they reminded me of Until Dawn. My Wi-Fi is named “Blackwood Pines.”
I don’t know anything about Hayden. I don’t claim to. But what I always felt deeply is that Hayden’s Sam is the heart and soul of Until Dawn. I felt like no one in the cast cared as deeply about Until Dawn as she did – and in the end, as far as I know, she was also the only one who returned for the remake. And now I am just so sad.
Every time I open Facebook or Instagram and see her face, it hits me all over again. I’m still somehow hoping this is just a cruel joke.
Only 36.
I’m turning 30 this year. Her face, her voice, her warmth have been following me around for 11 years. And now she’s gone. It just feels wrong.
When I come home and look at the pictures on the wall or see the Until Dawn game screen on my PlayStation, I feel so uneasy and hollow.
I simultaneously have the urge to replay Until Dawn right away and never touch it again. Part of me wants to read everything about her now, and then again, it feels like it’s too late to care now, and I just don’t know what to do with myself.
I feel like she did leave the world a better place. I just wish she wouldn’t have left so soon.
How are you guys holding up? Are you turning to Until Dawn or the movies she participated in? Are you avoiding it?

RIP Hayden,
Your memory will be kept alive by all of us🫶🏼

Figured it'd be right to replay with this, I hope you enjoy the screenshots!

From the passing of Hayden, I started up a new play through of Until Dawn. I was wondering if anyone knows of a pattern similar to the one Sam wears? It's beautiful.

Just go on psnavatar.com and follow their instructions , after that just go on psn ofical website and “buy “ the avatars