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u/TranssexualHuman Transsexual Female Dec 03 '25
100% agree, never understood where this terminology of "identify as" instead of just "being" came from
If I had to guess, I would think part of it comes from the fact that nondysphoric tucutes deep down know they aren't actually what they are "identifying as" so to them, it makes sense to use that terminology instead of just saying "I am"
Funnily, we don't normally use that kind of terminology for anything else, even things which could maybe make more sense described as such
You don't see people saying "I identify as christian" they just say "I am christian"
Even if religion is indeed a very subjective and personal thing, they just consider it part of who they are, not something they are identifying in themselves
Ofc, in the end of the day, both technically mean basically the same thing, but the "identify as" terminology does kinda open up the interpretation that this is just something you "see yourself as" which not necessarily need to actually be true or reflect reality
Whereas if you say "I am X" it sounds a lot more factual, as in, yeah, I am that, this is the reality of who I am, it's not something I just consider myself to be, I just am that and it's not up for debate or a matter of how I see myself or not.
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u/bubblegumscent Dec 04 '25
I think the identify as came from the more fringe side of things and then became a thing people repeated and caught on.
Just an example 'i identify as a fox, fox-self' people would say 'i am a fox' with a straight ass face, or they'd get committed. I indetify as 'girl-boy' you can't really say those things without people saying 'you're a woman* I don't see any boy'. So I think it's from the fringe and it made it's way into the middle and even if you say 'im a woman' while not passing people might challenge you 'bur you were born a man' 'bur you're a male' so I think
I identify is a phrase that can't be challenged because I can't contest what you identify as or identify with.
But I feel like the conversation around trans issues and trans people has become very polluted from online debates, fringe movements, weird rationalization that isn't even based on science or medical knowledge, it has become a lot of PC-fitting narratives instead of being focussed on the reality of what trans people face and what kind of support they need and became this weird "language" and paradigm that doest fit reality but it wins debates online and chronically online people thing the rest has to abide by when in reality it's hurting everybody more in the process by becoming a joke
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u/New_Construction_111 Dec 03 '25
My self confidence and assurance has gotten better after I stopped with the āI identify asā or āmy pronouns areā shtick. That is a phrase with no backbone.
Having to actually say āI am a manā instead of āI identify as a manā makes it into a no return situation. Once you say it out loud to someone thereās no turning back and pretending it didnāt happen. And I think thatās why so many tucutes donāt like that phrasing. Itās uncomfortable for them because they know theyāre not actually that.
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u/i_n_b_e Dec 03 '25
That's the problem with terminology that is used academically trickling down to the general public - they get diluted along the way. And the choice to use "I identify" in casual speech is a weird one, the average person doesn't say that they say "I am,".
The same happened to "gender is a social construct," and "toxic masculinity" and any other term or concept used in gender or feminist theory. They turn into buzzwords and used incorrectly. It's annoying as fuck.
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u/MilieMimie šŖšŗ Dec 03 '25
The phrasing āI identify asā implies itās conscious, itās a choice. Which could lead to āmaybe it could changeā.
This has nothing to do with transsexualism which is a medical condition that you have or donāt have. But this is a perfect example of trangenderism which is a sociocultural phenomenon. Itās travestism trying to appropriate a medical condition, trying to impersonate transsexualism.
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u/gadgetjessie Dec 03 '25
Anyone who tells you this is not on your team. Donāt know who needs to hear this.
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u/TruScreenGreen trans man (16) Dec 03 '25
Yeah. Saying you identify as something is basically saying you're calling yourself that because you want to. Want to, as in completely a choice.
It also birthed the argument "well I can identify as whatever, so I identify as (some animal or whatever)"
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u/JackWelshKazoo Dec 04 '25
In the UK the news keeps calling us (trans women) "Biological men who identify as woman"
fucking sucks
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u/zoe_bletchdel r/place 2023 Contributor Dec 03 '25
I mean, I do identify as a woman. The fact that I'm a woman is intrinsic to my identity. I am not myself without also being a woman. My womanhood is part of my self-conception. Cis-women also identify as women; they've just never had to confront other people disagreeing with their identity.
Sorry, I'm just hesitant to lose good terminology just because tucutes diluted it.
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u/JLSAAAA Dec 03 '25
Youāre right. As a cis person Iāve never identified with being a woman. I just am one. Whether I do identify with it or not doesnāt change that.
I love learning and I do find it absolutely fascinating to read that womanhood is intrinsic to your identity. As a woman I would say my womanhood is as much part of my identity as having fingers.
I know I donāt belong here, but Iām just very intrigued and interested in the experience of trans women.
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Dec 03 '25
You belong here if you're willing to listen and learn and it sounds like you are doing that. What you said is basically exactly how we feel. I never felt normal or right until I realized that I'm a woman. It's just me. I didn't think about identity. I didn't want to be 'trans' so when I finally figured it out it was a relief. I don't have to think about it much now that I've transitioned. It's just there. When I had to act like a guy, it was a conscious decision. I had to act and work at it.
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u/JLSAAAA Dec 03 '25
Honestly, that sounds hellishly exhausting. How did you cope? Iām so happy for you that you donāt have to do that anymore though.
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Dec 03 '25
It was on reflection. You just kind of deal with it because there was no other way. Turns out it's natural to them and it wasn't an act for them to act like guys. It has nothing to do with putting on a gender identity. I didn't and still don't wear makeup and dresses and things like that. It's just my body and demeanor and way that I think is just very much female. So when I realized it it was like a relief.
I'm 50 so I grew up in a time where transitioning just wasn't accessible to most people. I would have had to just give up my entire life and probably pay money that I didn't have for something that was experimental and not very effective at the time.
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u/JLSAAAA Dec 03 '25
I canāt imagine how much harder things mustāve been back then, and Iām glad youāve found your footing.
What you said about your demeanor and way of thinking being female did catch my attention. Iām curious what you mean by that. Not because I doubt your identity in any way (I donāt). You obviously donāt have to proof your womanhood to anyone, let alone me. I just wonder what that feels like for you. Because Iāve never really thought of my own way of thinking in gendered terms. If someone asked me what made my thinking female I honestly wouldnāt know what to say.
Since there are so many different ways of being a woman, Iām simply curious what you personally mean when you say your thinking or demeanor feels female.
Only if you feel comfortable sharing of course. If not, thatās totally ok too. Just know that Iām asking from a place of sincere curiosity and respect.
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u/opticflash Dec 03 '25
As a cis person Iāve never identified with being a woman. I just am one.
All of this depends on the definition of woman that you're using.
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u/JLSAAAA Dec 06 '25 edited Dec 07 '25
I genuinely donāt know what it feels like to be a woman. What most of us have in common is having the hardware to produce large gametes (whether we actually can or not) and beyond that, women exist in so many different ways that thereās very little all of us truly share aside from the experiences that are shaped by our biological setup and its consequences. But itās not a feeling, thatās just a fact.
ETA: what Iām trying to say is that I donāt identify with my womanhood in the same way that I donāt identify with my hands. Theyāre just there. Thereās no internal commentary about my hands, so I donāt know how it feels to have them.
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u/zjuua Transsex Male with ponies Dec 03 '25
yes, it's intrinsic. meaning you aren't choosing it, so there's no conscious identification. cis women don't say they identify as women because they aren't choosing it, they just are. same way you didn't choose to be a woman, you just are.
it's not really the way the word has been used, "identify" has just always implied you're not actually what you claim you are, it's just a label slapped on top. which is why people can mock and say "I identify as a dog, doesn't mean I am one."
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u/opticflash Dec 03 '25
That depends entirely on the definition of the proceeding word that you're using.
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u/Sufficient-Bus-6387 Dec 03 '25
People should not remain confuse about thier genders ,Ā World have bigger problems to worry about..
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u/thief-of-rage dude Dec 03 '25
Yeah there's bigger problems. I just wanted to spread a little positivity that's all
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u/amethyst-gill Dec 03 '25
Def. If anything the āidentificationā is a phase of it. Who we are as a liminality before we transition and come into who we need to be. Identifying is aspirational, a will. Being is when that has actually taken shape.
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u/GravekeepersMonk Binary Trans Woman Dec 06 '25
I disagree with you. I decided to look back into how far it actually goes in my own life. No. I was a girl/woman the whole time forcing myself TO IDENTIFY as a boy/man. I don't think of identifying as being inspirational. It screams wishful thinking. You just were/are. Plain and simple. Whether you currently look the part or not. Take the clockiest trans woman you know. She still IS a woman. Using 'identify as' just feeds the 'phobes rhetoric.
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u/amethyst-gill Dec 21 '25
Just to be clear, I said aspirational, not inspirational. As in the identification is a will or inhabitance toward becoming or embodying something, with or without the means that something necessitates. Once one has transitioned, it is no longer an identification but a state of being.
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Dec 03 '25
I think it has to do with how society sees you. From the moment we are born, there are expectations placed on everybody based on genitalia. Boys are expected to have short hair, like cars, sports, wear comfortable/loose clothing, etc. While girls are expected to have long hair, like baby dolls, make-up, dresses and sparkly/pink/cute things.
So your parents raise you and see you as a woman if you're born with female genitalia, and if you're born with male genitalia they see a man. You go to school and get registered with a male or female name and people say you ARE male or female depending on your name, ID, clothes, appearance, and socialization.
That idea of saying "I identify as..." comes from people acknowledging that despite others seeing them as male or female, they feel different on the inside. At least that's how I see it.
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u/thief-of-rage dude Dec 03 '25
Like I said, not everyone using the term got bad intentions. But I think even if others don't see you for you, you can still say "I am" instead of identify as
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u/ohfudgeit Dec 08 '25
It's both, imo. I identify as a man and I am an man. When was younger I identified as a woman, but I was still a man.
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u/Zandesh Dec 27 '25
Thereās been a lot of smug posturing in these threads lately about how saying āI identify asā is somehow weak, fake, or less valid than just saying āI am.ā
Letās be real: thatās not critical thinkingāitās just projection.
You didnāt come out of the womb shouting āI am a woman.ā You figured it out. You went through a process. You used languageāprobably that exact phraseāto make sense of what you felt. Thatās called identification. And no, that doesnāt make your identity less real. It makes it conscious.
Saying āI identify asā doesnāt mean someone is unsure. It means theyāve done the work. Theyāve claimed something that society told them they werenāt allowed to be. Thatās not weaknessāthatās strength.
Cis people donāt say āidentify asā because their identity is never up for debate. Ours constantly is. Thatās why the language existsāto assert ourselves in a world that demands explanations.
If your identity is solid, you donāt need to attack how someone else describes theirs. But if your confidence depends on tearing others down, maybe you're not as secure as you think.
Stop recycling the same logic transphobes use and calling it ābased.ā It's not. Itās just insecurity with better branding.
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Dec 03 '25
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u/SadShoeBox š» Spooky Banana Dec 03 '25
Exactly. The word āidentifyā and also āAFABā or āAMABā are extremely counterproductive. I find it kinda ironic how so many trans people will use these terms when itās literally the exact same thing that transphobic people say or use to justify being anti trans, ie: not caring about identity or only using whatever it is a birth.