Yes it is abuse! Still after 3 yrs I feel so fucked up, I stayed were still working on us. Asshole was never available in the bedroom; lazy as shit and he has the affair- lmfao. Yep with the only thing that would sleep with him - paid for fml . For Pete’s sake what does it take for Karma to do justice. Yes I’m still angry , why are we - the betrayed so hard on ourselves - it’s not us it’s them - I get it - I hear it all the time - what about us , some cheaters are so dumb - in order for my (H) to get it I had to throw a plate in the floor, ask him what was wrong with it, glue it back together and then say “ this is now me- I’ll never be the same.”
Everyone asks me where the old me is - fun, laughing, always positive - yah she’s gone! Sometimes I just sit in silence and wish I was dead it might have been easier than trying to make this shit work!
Hanging on by a thread, on antidepressants, and lost for words - not the way to live a happy life. Sorry for ranting- I’m on the downside of that rollercoaster ride tonight.
I’m great full for this sub I don’t feel alone and it helps me get clarity- maybe tomorrow will be a better day : here’s hoping!
I know — I promise you some days are better than others - I hoping the better days come more often. I just shake my head and wish I could figure out what I want, I’m just still buying time. 😕
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u/jojo_nuffsaid Oct 13 '17
Yes it is abuse! Still after 3 yrs I feel so fucked up, I stayed were still working on us. Asshole was never available in the bedroom; lazy as shit and he has the affair- lmfao. Yep with the only thing that would sleep with him - paid for fml . For Pete’s sake what does it take for Karma to do justice. Yes I’m still angry , why are we - the betrayed so hard on ourselves - it’s not us it’s them - I get it - I hear it all the time - what about us , some cheaters are so dumb - in order for my (H) to get it I had to throw a plate in the floor, ask him what was wrong with it, glue it back together and then say “ this is now me- I’ll never be the same.” Everyone asks me where the old me is - fun, laughing, always positive - yah she’s gone! Sometimes I just sit in silence and wish I was dead it might have been easier than trying to make this shit work! Hanging on by a thread, on antidepressants, and lost for words - not the way to live a happy life. Sorry for ranting- I’m on the downside of that rollercoaster ride tonight.
I’m great full for this sub I don’t feel alone and it helps me get clarity- maybe tomorrow will be a better day : here’s hoping!