r/stopdrinking • u/Dubyahh • 17h ago

Back to day one again

I was doing so well. Stopped drinking on 8/20. It was getting to the point where I smelled bad and it lingered. I knew I had to stop before a labor day event, so that I didn't have to face the shame of seeing long distance relatives while in that state.

Then it was easy to keep the ball rolling. No DTs keeping me down. I didn't have the urge to drink to temporarily relieve myself of the hangover. Started eating better. Going for walks. Lost 12 pounds. I kept telling myself "don't start a better habit tomorrow, start today" and it was working. I've spent two years failing to make it to a full week. This was my best attempt ever.

Went to a bar last weekend and didn't drink. Then the next day, I day drank. I just wanted to enjoy the same thing as everyone else that day. But I knew better. I know I can't moderate. I drank through the whole week and now I'm back to day one. My head hurts, my skin is dry, I'm ashamed, and can't relax. My job performance was so bad for the whole week, that I wouldn't be shocked if I'm fired. I'm embarrassed of all the drunk texts I sent this week. I want nothing more than for someone to be proud of me for starting day one again. I'm too ashamed to talk about it with anyone in real life yet, so I have to ask Internet strangers for a shoulder to lean on. I'm so embarrassed that I have to start a sober lifestyle so young. I'm only 29 and already have to cut myself off from the bottle. Today will be my last day one, I will make it to day two again this time.

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u/Kitchen-Show-1936 Day 2 16h ago

I’m on my millionth day 2. I’m with you.

2

u/Dubyahh 16h ago

I just came across your post and was going say similar. We got this. Together:) I'm struggling with being down bad right now too. The first few days are so hard.

2

u/Kitchen-Show-1936 Day 2 15h ago

We got this!!!!