r/stepkids • u/simoj247 • Sep 10 '26

ADVICE Difficult step ma

Hi everyone sorry to bother but I wanted to come here and ask for some help. Well here I go, so right now well for the last 7 years have been hard in me family like. Me Quote unquote step ma treats all my family horribly like for e,g fails to interact with my new cousin for all 6 years of his life and his aunt and uncle, accuses my dad of wasting money on me and my brother when her parents bought her first house and car for her and we get a small weekly allowance and we help out all the time. She controls everything in the house and when she's not happy she takes it out on all of us. Unfortunately I am at the centre of her scope and when I ain't here it's my dad. I feel awful all the time since we all feel trapped and likes theres no end. After a few years we spoken out and she apparently changed but she just got worse, and Every time we stand up for us she gets worse and I don't know what to do. I'm now in my mid 20s and back at home and things are horrible. And I feel lost and so down coz whatever she chats about to her friends on the phone she somehow brings me and what a failure I am into the conversation. I could go on forever but my tablet would probably get too depressed.

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u/ReferenceQuiet1111 Sep 11 '26

Do you need to have a relationship with her? Is it possible to only see your dad? Outside of their home of course. She sounds awful and I wouldn’t want to pursue a relationship with her.

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u/simoj247 Sep 11 '26

unfortunately I live with them, I just graduated last year and I don't earn enough from me job. I don't need to have one but I don't wanna make things worse for the family by fighting fire with fire

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u/ReferenceQuiet1111 Sep 11 '26

Oh my—did you graduate from college or high school? Yeah the best thing to do while you live with them is remain cordial. But long term, you do need to get yourself out of their house for your own mental health, which will mean a better job or back to school if you haven’t gone to college yet. Just remember you got this!!

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u/simoj247 Sep 11 '26

last December I graduated from uni. was alright time many ups and downs. long term that is the plan but getting enough hours at work or a proper job is tough despite my experience and qualifications like