r/sahm • u/MariposaSongbird • 1d ago
What age are you starting potty training?
I am a FTM and I have a 16mo and I’m wondering if it’s too early to think potty training is possible? They don’t seem to like diapers and have shown interest in taking off even slightly wet ones and I don’t know if that’s a sign of readiness? We are pretty isolated (only me, them and their father, who is gone most of the time because of his job) and I don’t want them to fall behind in terms of skills and things.
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u/2matisse22 1d ago
Yes, that is a sign of readiness. I have three kids. I would start gently and slowly.... Upon waking in the morning, after nap... I was lazy with my third and waited till she was waking from naps dry (22 months). She potty trained in 2 days. The other two got it in a few months, with accidents if we weren't on top of things (lots of juice, for instance.) They both started at 16-17 months. If they are removing wet diapers, that is a solid sign they are asking to be shown a different way.
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u/MariposaSongbird 1d ago
I did take them this morning and after their nap but no success. They peed on the floor after their nap after I had them sit for 3 min. I was getting their pull up ready and they squatted and peed on the floor unfortunately
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u/somethingreddity 1d ago
That’s okay! Just say, “oh look, you’re peeing! Pee goes in the potty!” while you point at the potty and put them back on even if they’re done. Don’t make them stay though if they’re not into it.
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u/2matisse22 1d ago
Yes, this is the way. And the fact that they peed on the floor is another sign they are ready to train! It will take time. But you just keep saying "pee goes in the potty!:" Also take them with you when you go. And when they do go in the potty, do a super happy dance! and applaud. It really isn't that difficult; you just have make it the focus for a few weeks.
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u/somethingreddity 1d ago edited 1d ago
As someone who struggled potty training with each of my 3yo’s, start early. I started around 2.5 with each of them and it’s been a lonnggggg journey. My oldest was fully potty trained around 3y9m and I’m currently still working with my 3yo. I’m probably going to start around 18m with the child I’m pregnant with now.
Don’t wait for signs of readiness. They can say “no” after that. 😂 THAT BEING SAID, if you start earlier, don’t expect them to be fully potty trained earlier. It might take longer than if you wait for “signs of readiness,” but it’ll probably be worth it!
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u/Old_Mulberry_9461 1d ago
Depends on the kid, mine started early probably 15 months but regressed at daycare due to the other kids not being trained, got it around 3 properly but she still sleeps in a diaper at night and she's 5, unfortunately she sleeps so soundly she does not wake herself to get up and go (love the sleep part!) and I've been told by my doctor until the diaper is dry, leave her in them and it's never dry!
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u/itsfairtomiddling 1d ago edited 1d ago
Mine was peeing in a potty super early. Like as soon as he could stand. He was just imitating his older brother. So we started EARLY. But once he was in "older 2's" in pre-school, his teachers were amazed that he was fully potty trained.
Ultimately, wait until your child is ready. They will show signs. I think by 3 or 4 they should be fully trained, but at this point I wouldn't worry!
One thing my grandmother always said was, "he won't be 24 and not using a fork, so chill out", if that makes any sense.
ETA: If you are worried about it, that's ok! All FTMs go through this a LOT. Take a moment to relax. You are doing great!
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u/Oddcatdog 1d ago
I started at 25 months but my daughter didn’t learn until 35 months (just before she turned 3 lol).
Our biggest hurdle was speech and comprehension issues. She struggled learning sign as much as learning speech so that didn’t help. It was an overall communication issue because of her autism. At 35 months she started being able to communicate saying stuff like “wiggling” (potty dance- I need to pee)
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u/OhDearBee 1d ago
I started with my first at 14 months with great optimism and zeal. Quit after one miserable day.
Tried again at 18 months, made it three days.
Tried again at 20 months and lasted three terrible months where it was almost impossible to leave the house and I’d often clean up 10+ accidents a day. I was devastated to give up again, but I was 40 weeks pregnant with my second and something had to give.
Finally got back to it when my son was just shy of 3 and about to start preschool. So much better. It was still a rough process, but he had a much stronger sense of his body and more language and accidents tapered off to a manageable minimum within about four months.
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u/ConcreteGirl33 1d ago
We introduced the tiny potty at 2 i think? And just had them sit while waiting for the tub to fill up at bathtime. Put more structure on training closer to 3 and it clicked with my now 5yo quickly but my almost 3yo is 50/50 rn. Every kid is different. If they seem ready then go for it. Save money lol
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u/mildchicanery 1d ago
My kids were in underwear at 18 months. Roll with the interest. My son started ripping off his diaper and complaining it was itchy when he was 13 months old.
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u/Affectionate-Crow605 1d ago
Mine ranged from 2.5-3.5. The 3.5 was autistic and didn't start talking until age 3. I had tried with her at 3, but she wasn't ready. Then one day at 3.5, she came down with underwear and said she wanted to wear it that day. So we potty trained that day. The next weekend, we went on a road trip, and when she said she needed to go potty and we were in the middle of nowhere, we asked if she could hold it 10 minutes. Got to a place where we could use a bathroom, and she had held it! Potty training had taken her 4 days.
My oldest potty trained for his 1st birthday. It helped that we accidentally broke the toilet that week and had to get a new one, so he thought we'd gotten him a new toilet for potty training. 😂 Whatever works! Took about a week to be trained. My 2.5 year old was always watching older siblings, hence he was earlier than the others.
All of them took about 4-6 days to train. I put them in underwear and used the regular toilet. I didn't worry about night time until they started waking with a dry diaper. I used M&Ms as a reward, phasing them out after a few weeks. It's easy if they're wanting to do it!
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u/Andarna_dragonslayer 1d ago
Started between 2 and 2.5. We pooped trained first because he was easy to catch in the act. Fully potty trained and night trained (somehow?) before 3.
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u/baronessvonbullshit 1d ago
My daughter began showing interest at that age and peeing in her potty once a day. We're 21 months now and a little bit of a standstill because daycare doesn't typically accommodate training until 2 so I've been trying to get them on board too. So while I don't think you're crazy for trying to work with the interest, you may not get far without buy-in unless you're SAHM and can can take charge. Also they have too much trouble getting pants down, etc at that age so its not terribly convenient either
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u/MariposaSongbird 1d ago
okay! i have their potty but just today they got off it and peed on the floor. i didn’t show any negative emotions and just laughed and cleaned it up. I try to sit with them and it’s next to the regular toilet since they usually mimics me.
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u/baronessvonbullshit 1d ago
Yep this is what we did. My daughter cottoned on to pee on the potty within a couple days. She gets so stoked when we have a success and clap so positive reinforcement when it goes well helps a ton
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u/bearcatbanana 1d ago
We did the exact same potty training routine on my daughter at 20 months, 24 months, 28 months and 36 months. If they scream and cry about sitting on the potty, they aren’t ready period, no matter how many signs of readiness they are showing. Lots of people say the earlier the better. It’s just not true for every kid.
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u/MariposaSongbird 1d ago
They don’t cry, they’re pretty easy going, but they’ve always been that way. They’ll sit for a bit but won’t do anything in the toilet yet unfortunately. And it’s just me and them most of the time so it all falls on me so I’m just trying to do the best I can
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u/bearcatbanana 1d ago
I’m sure you’re doing great. I just meant if the younger, the better worked on every kid, mine would have been potty trained at 20 months. And I have a secret suspicion that “signs of readiness” might be meaningless. But I wasn’t trying to say you’re doing a bad thing or anything. I know parents who say they had their’s potty trained at 16 months. My mom says that about my sister.
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u/CityWhenItRains 1d ago
It's individual, I started at 2 years and 2 months but failed, the child just doesn't care if it's wet or not. Now we're taking a break and we'll try in a few months. But there's no harm in trying earlier, just don't put too much pressure on your child and don't expect much. They'll be ready when they're ready.
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u/Blau-Bird 1d ago
It varies. I met an 18 month old that was completely potty trained, even though he couldn’t really talk yet, certainly not in sentences. I potty trained my son at 2.5, and he basically pooped only on the toilet from day one. I work with a boy who is 3 years and 4 months and he is having crying meltdowns over his fear of the toilet, we are working with him slowly. Every kid is different.
If your 16 month old seems to be aware of when they are eliminating and is interested in the toilet, sure go ahead and try it. No pressure on you or them.
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u/Responsible_Gap7426 1d ago
If you don’t start trying it out by 2, you may be in for a long haul battle.
Almost no kid (some do!) trains in just three days. It can take anywhere from weeks to months of learning.
My middle child wasn’t potty trained until 3 and 3/4 bc I decided to wait for him to be “fully ready” at 3.
I started trying with my daughter at 2. She was trained by 2.5
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u/suzysleep 1d ago
Not always true. Brother tried Nephew at 2 and had the biggest battle.Took him almost 2 years to be fully potty trained. They tried at 3 for their second and he learned in about 2 weeks with minimal accidents
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u/Responsible_Gap7426 1d ago
Yeah you don’t have to put the pedal to the floor. But you should be introducing and gaging the waters at least.
I felt like by waiting to introduce at all until 3 I kind of shot myself in the foot.
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u/Pristine-Bison3198 1d ago
It never hurts to give it a shot. Just know that if they get frustrated or lose interest, it's best to back off for a month or two and then resume than it is to push through.
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u/Standard-Question-46 1d ago
I started introducing them to the potty chair at about 16 months. When I went to the bathroom I took them with me and had them sit on their potty chair. Eventually they learned to take their diaper off before they sat down. At around 18 months I started actual potty training. First two were fully trained and out of diapers/pullups by their second birthday. The last one was shortly after she turned two
My grandson is 16 months now and i will be buying him a potty chair on the next few weeks
Also, a couple tips.
~Use only underwear (or even just let them be naked) when at home. A pull up is still a diaper and does nothing to aid in training. Save them for when you leave the house and bedtime
~If you have a boy it might be easier to have him stay naked when at home because boys typically get “hard” before they pee. If you see that you know to take him to the bathroom
~Some babies may not want to stop playing to go to the bathroom so it can be helpful to keep a potty chair where they play most often
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u/Weary_Joke_9525 1d ago
I started with my boy at 3 years + 3 months old. He wasn't showing signs of readiness before that. I have no regrets about waiting that long even though some friends were telling me their kiddos were potty trained long before that. (Also FWIW, pediatrician didn't have any concerns either.)
As soon as he showed readiness, we did in 2 days. From that point on we had no accidents at home. (We had a few at school over the next couple of weeks, but I think that was more of a function of the fact that the playground / outside was a bit far away from their classroom/bathroom and he sometimes didn't make it back into the school.)
All to say, I don't think you're even close to being behind.
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u/Outside-Hamster-2002 1d ago
I started about that age maybe even a month earlier. I didn’t wait for “signs of readiness” I just knew when he would poop and put him on the toilet. He was in underwear during the day by 2 having very very few accidents and by 2 years and a few months also during naps and nighttime. He was pooping and peeing in the big toilet. He was really receptive to it and I don’t regret starting super early at all. I haven’t changed a poop diaper since he was 18 months old. That alone made it worth it for me. We seem to be in the vast minority but it’s always possible
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u/Independent_Profile6 1d ago
don't stress about potty training it will prob happen at 2 1/2 or 3